Wanton Desire

by Ruth D. Kerce

  “I’m glad you’re home and that the baby is all right.”

  They pulled apart. “Thanks,” Beth replied as Cal walked up beside them. “I was so scared for a while. I wish you’d gotten here earlier.”

  “So do I. But as long as it all worked out in the end, we can be grateful.” She looked at Josie and lightly touched her petite nose. Josie was just as beautiful as Emma knew she’d be. She had her mother’s blonde hair and big blue eyes, which would likely change color as she got older. The little girl didn’t make a sound. She just stared up at her as if in wonder.

  “It was definitely a blessing,” Cal said. “I hope never to feel that helpless again.”

  Wade and Skylar joined them. Skylar immediately came forward to give her a hug. She glanced around. “Where’s Joe? He wasn’t in town. We heard all sorts of rumors as soon as we rode in.”

  She couldn’t help but wonder what kind of rumors they’d heard but she didn’t dare ask. “He’s inside, um—”

  Colton pushed into the middle of them. “Howdy!”

  Emma smiled down at the boy. “Well, hello, Colton. My, you’ve gotten so big.”

  “I’m not a baby anymore, so Mama’s gonna have another one,” he said excitedly. “I’m going to teach her everything I’ve learnt so far. Pa says it’s my job.”

  Emma looked up at Skylar, who smiled widely. Her hand drifted to her stomach. “Yes, we’re going to have a baby. The doctor who took care of Josie confirmed it.”

  “Colton’s convinced it’s going to be a girl,” Wade said.

  “Oh, Skylar,” Emma replied. “That’s wonderful.” She hugged the woman, sincerely happy for her. She knew Skylar and Wade had wanted more children for quite some time. “Congratulations.”

  Colton cocked his head as he continued to look at her. He pointed to her stomach. “You too!”

  “What?”

  “You’re gonna have a baby too.”

  He hesitated a little before saying that last word as if unsure of himself or as if distracted for a moment. Or maybe that was just her imagination. Emma wasn’t sure. All she knew for certain was that her heart was pounding in her chest.

  Everyone looked at her and they all fell silent. She chuckled. “Well, maybe one of these days.” As she spoke, her stomach fluttered, catching her by surprise. She held back the gasp that almost leapt from her throat. Pregnancy was possible but, of course, the boy would have no idea of that.

  She looked around at all the expectant faces and waved off the subject with a flip of her hand. “Why don’t we all go inside and sit down for a meal?” Her face felt warm and she hoped her cheeks hadn’t turned red. “We can catch each other up on everything.”

  “Yes, of course,” Skylar said quickly, breaking the tension in the air. “I’m sure Myrah is just itching to fill us with some of her good food.”

  “Myrah!” Colton exclaimed, running toward the house.

  “Sounds good to me,” Cal said. “I could use one of Myrah’s meals.”

  Beth slapped his shoulder. “Thanks.”

  “No offense, honey. But you’ve got to admit she has an almost magical touch with food. You know her pies are famous far and wide.”

  Emma breathed a sigh of relief at the change of subject. Everyone continued chattering about food and about the trip to Santa Fe as they all headed for the house.

  * * * * *

  Over supper, everyone got caught up on the happenings since the last time they’d all been together. Joe even made it down the stairs to join them, despite Emma’s protests. It was way too soon for him to be up and about. She’d tried to convince him to stay in bed and rest but he wouldn’t have it.

  Montana and Willie had decided to eat upstairs because Montana’s leg was too sore for him to walk. Emma suspected that the true reason Willie didn’t join them was that she didn’t want to face Beth and spoil the reunion if they got into an argument. Somehow she needed to end the feud those two had going but she didn’t know how to broach the subject with Beth. Maybe it was better to simply leave it alone, given the coming changes.

  They were all appalled to hear about the problems that had taken place while they were gone—everything about Slim and Cora, the kidnapping, how Joe got shot, and the destruction done by the flooding. Cal and Beth were both anxious to see their place and supervise the repairs being done, even though they were mostly complete now after more of Wade’s men had pitched in to help. They were all especially thrilled to hear of her and Joe’s engagement and the women couldn’t wait to plan the wedding.

  Earlier, Willie hadn’t said much when she and Joe had told her the news before the rest of them got together. Emma worried about the girl. Willie had said that she was ecstatic about them marrying but she’d have to think about going to Boston with them. It was such a long way and such a different lifestyle. Emma hoped the girl would agree.

  She didn’t think Joe would leave without his sister. If not, then what would they do? Even if he did agree to leave without her, what would Willie do on her own? She’d survived on her own before meeting up with Joe but she certainly hadn’t fared very well.

  Emma looked around the table, enjoying the family feel of having all her friends around her. Yes, coming back here to practice medicine was definitely what she wanted to do. She didn’t have that much longer to go in her studies and Elk Valley needed a permanent doctor—someone who knew and cared about the residents and the future of the town.

  Before they all had sat down, she’d taken a closer look at Josie at Beth’s request. The baby seemed fine and no worse for the wear. Her hand lightly caressed her stomach as she wondered if Colton’s innocent announcement hadn’t been so innocent. It certainly was possible that she was carrying Joe’s child, though it was too early to tell. The boy had predicted Beth’s pregnancy… The chatter around the table ceased and she looked up from her plate. “What?”

  “Are you all right?” Joe asked from beside her. “You were just staring blindly at the roast beef.”

  She chuckled. “Sorry. My thoughts were elsewhere.”

  “Well, I’m not surprised,” Beth said. “So much has happened. And with the wedding coming up, I don’t see how you can eat at all.”

  Emma simply smiled.

  As the others started up the conversation again, talking of horses and home improvements, Joe leaned close to her. “Are you sure you’re all right?”

  She nodded, then turned her concern to him. “How are you feeling?”

  “I’m a little more tired and sore than I thought I’d be.”

  “Do you want to go upstairs?”

  “Will you come up with me?”

  “Yes. But you know I can’t stay the night. Not in the same room. Not now that Wade and Skylar are back.”

  “Damn. All right. I’m not going to sleep nearly as well without you next to me. But I do think I need to lie down.”

  They pushed back from the table and everyone looked their way. “I’m going to take Joe back upstairs,” Emma told them. “He’s worn out. I’ll be back for dessert.”

  “Need any help?” Wade asked.

  “No.” She put her arm around Joe’s waist. “We can make it ourselves.”

  She got Joe up the stairs and settled into his bed without too much trouble. After giving him something for his pain, she stayed with him until he fell asleep, then she went to check on Montana. He seemed to be doing well. Willie had quite the talent for bandaging and mending folks.

  She urged the girl to go get some sleep but Willie wanted to stay with Montana for a while longer. Emma worried about how close they’d grown so quickly, thinking back to Joe’s words, but she didn’t voice her concerns.

  After Emma left the room, Montana looked at Willie. “So are you going to Boston with them?”

  Willie’s eyes widened. “How do you know about that?”

  “I heard them talking to you in the hall earlier about getting hitched and going back East together.” He hadn’t meant to listen in but they hadn’t
actually kept their voices low as Willie and Emma had helped Joe from his room.

  “Oh. Um, I don’t know what I’m going to do. I haven’t made up my mind yet. I don’t think I would like a big city. I’m not exactly all prim and proper like the ladies there will be. Nor do I like following rules. But I just found Joe and I don’t want to lose the only real family I got left.”

  He reached out and touched her hand. “You’ll make the right decision.” He didn’t want her to go. She was the only person on his side here in Elk Valley. Or so it felt like. He hadn’t had many friends in his life but he considered her a friend and would miss her terribly. At the same time, he couldn’t ask her to stay. Though the thought did occur to him. He had nothing to offer her. Hell, he couldn’t even take care of himself.

  It seemed he was going to be alone once more. He didn’t much like the idea. Never had, which was one reason he’d stuck with Slim for so long. Although…

  Just because you have folks around you, doesn’t mean you aren’t alone.He remembered his ma telling him that when he was very young. It was one of the last memories he had of her. He supposed he understood what she’d meant now more than ever.

  Willie looked at him all expectantly, as if he had the answers, when all he really had were questions and feelings of inadequacy. He pulled his hand back. “I need to get some rest.”

  She nodded and a look of disappointment crossed her face. “I’ll leave you be then. I’ll check on you in the morning and bring up breakfast.”

  Even though she wasn’t his responsibility, he still felt as useless as tits on a boar hog, as if he should have been able to make everything right for her. “Fine. Thanks.” He turned on his side away from her. He knew he wouldn’t sleep a wink. Still, he closed his eyes and forced his body to relax.

  He heard her step from the room and lightly close the door behind her. “It’s best,” he whispered to himself. He’d done a good job of messing up his own life. He sure as hell wasn’t going to mess up hers.

  Chapter Fourteen

  Emma looked down at her frilly white dress, hardly believing the day was finally here. Her wedding. It hadn’t actually been that long since the shootings, just long enough for Joe to be getting around again without too much trouble. Even so, she’d been counting the days, eager to become his wife and for them to start their new lives together.

  She’d lucked out and found a white gown at the general store. Myrah had fixed it up with pearl buttons and lace and pieces of white satin. She thought it was about the prettiest dress she’d ever seen.

  Beth rushed around behind her, making sure everything was ready and in order. Beth was the maid of honor and Willie was a bridesmaid. Since her papa wasn’t around to give her away, Emma had asked Cal to do the honors. Wade would stand up as Joe’s best man. Joe had asked Montana to be a groomsman as a thank you for saving them but he’d declined, saying it didn’t feel right.

  Wade had also stepped in and offered the young man a job but he’d declined that too. She shook her head as she thought about Montana. She didn’t know what was rolling around in his head. Even so, she felt bad for him. He seemed so lost and uncertain of what he should be doing while here or even what he wanted to do with the rest of his life. He should have taken Wade up in his offer and put down some roots. Montana was still recovering from his leg injury but would soon be well enough to leave. Then what would become of him? She wished him well and hoped he found whatever he was looking for in life.

  Thankfully, Willie had finally agreed to move to Boston with Joe and her. She’d telegrammed ahead and asked some friends to find a suitable place for all three of them to live. Paying for a new place would be a challenge but hopefully Joe would find work soon. They both had some money saved and Wade had some inquiries in with a few businessmen out that way whom he or his family had been in association with over the years.

  Willie could get some proper schooling while in Boston and the exposure to more culture would do her good. Emma fingered the necklace the girl had loaned her to wear for the ceremony. A golden locket. The only thing she had left from her ma. Apparently it had been passed down for several generations. So very precious. She’d been touched by Willie’s gesture and had vowed to take good care of the heirloom.

  “Are you ready?” Beth asked, coming up behind her.

  Nerves suddenly struck her hard. She patted her hair and noticed her fingers were trembling. “I guess so. Do I look all right?”

  “You look beautiful.” She chuckled. “And scared to death.”

  They both chuckled at that. “It’s a big step,” Emma said. “Though it seemed forever coming, it’s also moving so fast.” She shook her head. “I know that doesn’t make any sense.”

  Beth patted her arm. “I understand. I felt the same when Cal and I got married. I think every bride probably suffers nerves of some sort.”

  * * * * *

  Joe tried for the fifth time to get his tie right. “Damn it.”

  “That’s quite a greeting.” Skylar pulled the door closed behind her.

  “Sorry. I’m all thumbs today.” And all nerves. Married. Him. He never would have thought this day would come.

  Skylar walked over to him. “Let me.” She glanced around. “Where’s Wade?”

  “There was some problem with a delivery. He said he’d be back before the ceremony started.”

  Skylar fiddled with his tie, undoing it and then retying it properly “I’m really happy that you’ve found someone to love and build a future with. I’ve always wanted that for you, Joe. Emma is a wonderful woman and I know you two are going to be really happy together.”

  “Yeah? Then how come you have that frown on your face?”

  She looked up at him as she finished with his tie. When she stepped back, she sighed. “I’m worried about Boston and how you’re going to fare there.”

  A grin tugged at his lips. “Don’t think I can manage life in a big city?”

  “I don’t think you’re going to like it.”

  He also had his doubts but he wanted to do this for Emma. “It won’t be forever. We’ll be back.”

  She pointed a finger at him. “I’ll hold you to that. This is where you belong. Where you both belong.”

  “I know.” He scooped her up around the waist, twirled her around and gave her a peck on the cheek.

  She laughed and patted his chest.

  “Leave you alone for five minutes and you’ve got your hands all over my wife.”

  They both turned to see Wade standing at the door. The smile on his face showed his words were simply in jest.

  Joe released Skylar and stepped back. “That’s what happens when you run out on me. I couldn’t even fix my tie properly.”

  Wade stepped up beside Skylar and slid his arm around her waist.

  She kissed her husband’s cheek, then looked back and forth between the two of them. “Joe’s a little nervous, I think.”

  “More than a little,” he mumbled.

  “So I see.” Wade nodded as if in understanding. “Well, everything out in the garden looks ready to go. The preacher is waiting and the guests are here. Myrah has all the food handled. Beth said that Emma was ready. Colton and Josie are giving Montana hives though, you better go rescue him.”

  Joe cocked an eyebrow at Skylar. “You left the kids with Montana.”

  “He needs to feel useful. They’re all right. I’ve got one of the hands watching to make certain. But I do have to get out there and make sure everyone gets seated and that the piano is properly positioned where everyone can hear the music.” She kissed Wade again before rushing from the room.

  Joe shook his head. “She’s a much better person with you than she ever would have been with me.” His and Skylar’s relationship never had gone the way of lovers but there was a time when he’d contemplated it.

  “I know,” Wade answered seriously. After an awkward silence, a slight smile crossed his face.

  Joe laughed. “Well, I guess it’s about time I
got hitched.”

  * * * * *

  “Where’s Willie?” Emma asked, looking around the bedroom. “I haven’t seen her all morning. Is she dressed and ready?”

  “I don’t know,” Beth answered. “She wasn’t in her room last I looked. And Myrah hadn’t seen her in a couple of hours, or so she said when I asked.”

  “That’s strange. I hope she’s all right. It’s almost time.”

  “It is time. And we can’t wait for her forever.”

  Emma’s heart skipped a beat. “We can’t start without Willie, Beth. She’s Joe’s sister.”

  “Maybe she got cold feet about being a bridesmaid. Or maybe she just took off. It wouldn’t surprise me.”

  “Beth!”

  She sighed. “I’m sorry.” A genuine look of apology crossed Beth’s face. “I shouldn’t have said that. I’m sure she’s around somewhere and will see the ceremony. She probably just doesn’t want to stand up in front of everyone in a dress. I doubt she’s even owned one until now.”

  Emma wrung her hands, wondering what was the best thing to do. She supposed delaying the ceremony wouldn’t be appropriate, considering how many people had ridden out to see the wedding. “I wish you two got along. I love you both, you know.”

  “I know.” Beth hesitated a moment. “Maybe I have been a bit hard on her. But she’s a tough one to figure out. She doesn’t let people get close. I didn’t trust her for a long time.” She shrugged. “Maybe I was wrong.”

  Beth’s confession gave Emma hope and her heart felt lighter. “Will you tell Willie that?”

  “I’ll think on it.” Beth fussed a bit more with both their dresses. “Perfect. Now come along.” She led the way out. “If we wait any longer, everyone will think that you got cold feet.”

  Worry hit Emma hard. Willie might have been scared off by having to wear a dress and stand up in front of everyone, but wouldn’t she have at least told someone? If Willie had let Joe know, he would have passed the message on to her, so she figured he had no idea yet that his sister was unaccounted for. She just hoped the girl turned up soon.