Chasing a Dream

by Beth Cornelison

  “Mercy,” he mumbled as she worked her way back toward his lips and settled more fully on top of him. The Coyote’s buying habits were quickly forgotten.

  ***

  “Hmm. That’s weird.”

  “What is?” Brian looked up from the evening newspaper at Hallie, who browsed through the day’s mail.

  “You got a postcard from Samson, Arkansas, but there’s nothing written on it.”

  He arched an eyebrow. “I don’t know anybody in Arkansas. Let me see it.” She handed him the card, and he turned it over to study the postmark. When he saw the handwriting, his pulse screeched to a stop. “Oh, my God! It’s from Justin.”

  “What? But I thought—”

  “This is his handwriting. I’m sure of it.” Stunned, Brian stared at the card another moment, examining every detail. “The postmark is only two days old. He’s alive! That’s what the card is for. To tell us he’s okay and where he is.” Relief as pure and sweet as anything he’d ever felt rushed over him. “I knew he’d contact me somehow, but . . .”

  “But?”

  “He doesn’t want anyone else to know where he is. Otherwise, why use such strange and vague means to contact us?”

  “Do you think that means Tess is all right, too?” Hallie’s tone sounded as hopeful as the light in her eyes.

  “I don’t know.” Tapping the card against his palm, Brian narrowed his eyes. “But I intend to find out.” He shoved out of his chair and stalked toward the back of the house with Hallie trailing after him.

  “What are you going to do? Brian, if Justin’s being this secretive, doesn’t it stand to reason he might not want you to blow his cover? I doubt he sent you the card to have you come after him.”

  He threw his suitcase on the bed while Hallie fussed.

  “He’s my brother. I just have to make sure he’s okay. I’ll be careful, I promise.”

  “I don’t like it. It could be dangerous for you.”

  Turning, Brian pulled Hallie into his arms. “If it’s dangerous for me, then it’s dangerous for Justin. And that’s all the more reason for me to try to help him.”

  “Oh God, Brian. I couldn’t stand it if anything happened to you.” Hallie hugged his waist and turned worried eyes to his.

  “And I couldn’t stand it if anything happened to Justin, and I hadn’t tried to help him.”

  She sighed sadly. “I understand, but I don’t like it. Not one bit.”

  Squeezing her tighter, he kissed the crown of her head. “I love you,” he murmured into her hair then turned to finish his packing. “I’ll leave first thing in the morning.”

  ***

  Hallie’s scream jolted Brian from his sleep.

  “Don’t give me a reason to kill her.” The gruff male voice sent panic sluicing through him as he spotted the dark figure holding Hallie from behind.

  Shadows shrouded the man’s face, but the gleam of the gun aimed at Hallie’s head was unmistakable.

  Brian’s heart leaped to his throat. Raising his palms slowly, he said, “Okay, easy. Don’t hurt her. What do you want?”

  “I want your little brother and Tess Sinclair. Where are they?”

  “I don’t know.” Brian prayed his courtroom training would help him out-bluff the man holding his wife at gunpoint.

  The click of the gun cocking reverberated in the dark room. Hallie whimpered.

  “Come on, guy,” Brian begged. “Let her go. We don’t know anything about where Tess is.” That was almost true.

  “Why don’t I believe you?”

  Brian pulled in a slow breath. Don’t panic.

  “Look, I read about Tess’s death in the paper. We assumed that meant Justin was dead, too. Some men dragged them out of here the other night and—”

  “I know all that, asshole. I was one of those men. But I made the mistake of trusting your punk brother and the Sinclair woman when they couldn’t be trusted. Now Randall Sinclair’s after my neck and theirs. I don’t plan on dying. I plan to find Tess and your brother first. And you’re gonna help me.”

  Listening carefully to the man’s explanation, Brian gauged his motives and calculated the risks. “What if you do find them first?”

  “I’ll ask the questions, pal. Tell me where they are, or I’ll blow blondie’s head off.” The thug nudged Hallie with the gun again, and Brian’s gut clenched.

  “I don’t know where—”

  “Don’t lie to me!” The man jerked his arm tighter around Hallie, and she gasped.

  The sudden volume and desperation in the man’s voice alarmed Brian. He played a dangerous game for his brother’s life, but Hallie’s danger was immediate.

  “I’ll kill her! I saw the suitcase. Where are you headed?”

  “A business trip.”

  “Bullshit!”

  Brian heard Hallie sniffling. He fumbled quickly for a plausible story. “Nashville.”

  The man didn’t answer. Brian held his breath.

  “I don’t believe you.”

  “I swear to God. Justin always wanted to go to Nashville. If he’s anywhere, he’s there.”

  “What if I said I was going to take blondie here along for the ride? If I don’t find little brother in Nashville, blondie dies.”

  Brian’s palms were sweating. “Take me instead.”

  “Not a chance. Your brother and Tess betrayed me and cost my wife her life. If I don’t have my wife, why should you have yours? Last chance, brother. Where are they?”

  Knowing he only had one chance to save Justin and Hallie both, Brian sent up a prayer for assistance and courage. He had to tell the man what he wanted to know then hope he could find Justin before this maniac.

  “I got a blank postcard from Samson, Arkansas, today. I think he’s there.”

  The thug remained silent as if considering the information. When he finally released Hallie, she slumped to the bed, sobbing. Brian rushed to her.

  “You’ve been most helpful,” the intruder said as he backed toward the door with the gun still aimed at them. “Do yourselves a favor. Don’t say anything to the cops about this, or I’ll be back. Blondie won’t be so lucky next time. Got it?” He disappeared into the hallway, and Brian wrapped his arms around Hallie. She trembled violently in his embrace. Or was that him shaking so hard?

  “I want you to go to your parents’ house. Wait there for me. I’ll check in with you tonight. If you haven’t heard from me in twenty-four hours, it means something’s gone wrong. In that case, call the police and tell them what you know . . . everything that’s happened.”

  Levering himself higher, he peeked out the bedroom window to watch the light-colored sedan pull away from the front of the house. He dressed in a hurry while Hallie gaped at him in horror.

  “You’re not still going after Justin, are you? Brian, you can’t!” Her voice was high-pitched and hysterical.

  “I have to get to him before that creep does! Get dressed and get out of here! Go to your parents, and don’t talk to anyone unless you don’t hear from me.” He snatched up his suitcase.

  “Brian!” Hallie screamed in panic.

  He stopped long enough to blow her a kiss. “I love you, babe.”

  CHAPTER TWENTY-FOUR

  “Morelli just left the brother’s house. You want me to rough up the brother and find out what he told him?” Dominic asked his boss via cell phone.

  “No. Follow him.” Randall fumed at Morelli’s betrayal. “Once you have an idea of where he’s headed, call me back. We’ll meet you. I think Mr. Morelli will lead us straight to Tess and her boyfriend. Then we can pop all three at once.”

  “Yes, boss.” Randall disconnected the call then leaned back in his desk chair to wait for further news. Ten minutes later, Dominic called back. “Morelli seems to be headed out of town. Going north. You think he’s going to that little podunk town Boyd’s from?” “That’s what you’re to find out. Don’t lose him! We’ll be right behind you.”

  ***

  Night encroached on
the horizon by the time Brian passed the sign that welcomed him to Samson, Arkansas. His eyes scanned the town with a heightened sense of awareness, and apprehension wound inside him. What if Justin had merely been passing through town on the way to Nashville or Canada or . . . ? Stopping at a red light, he dragged a hand over his face and sighed. He was bushed. He’d driven nonstop after being awakened early that morning by the thug with the gun. Lord, his life had been turned upside down. When he found Justin, he’d kill his little brother himself!

  Spying a small motel, Brian pulled in to get a room. He couldn’t do much to find Justin until tomorrow, so his first order of business was sleep.

  ***

  Tess walked up behind Justin, who hunched over a notepad at the tiny table in their motel room, and she rubbed the muscles in his shoulders. She glanced at the paper he worked on while so deeply in thought. “What are you doing?”

  “Hmm, that feels good.” Justin rolled his shoulders as she massaged them. He tossed his pen down and handed her the pad of paper. “I’m trying to reconstruct a few songs I’d written. I thought maybe I could use a different name and try to get them recorded, even if I can’t be the one to sing them.”

  Tess moved around to the edge of the bed and sat down with the pad, meeting Justin’s bright blue eyes with a smile of admiration. “Never say die.”

  “Huh?” Justin wrinkled his nose as he absently scratched his stubble-darkened chin.

  “You. Your never-going-to-quit attitude. Your faith and doggedness.”

  “Are you calling me stubborn?” Justin tipped a wry grin at her.

  “Yes. Charmingly stubborn. Don’t ever change, Justin. It’s one of the reasons I fell in love with you.”

  The grin on his lips slipped, and his eyes flashed with emotion. “Say that again.”

  “Which part?”

  “You used the ‘L’ word.”

  She glanced down at her hands and furrowed her brow. “I did, didn’t I?”

  “Yeah.”

  She did love him. So why was it so hard to say the words? He’d pledged his love to her, sworn to stand by her, proven his trustworthiness. What was wrong with her?

  “Justin, I—”

  “It’s all right. I understand.”

  But the pain in his eyes and the disappointment in his voice said he didn’t understand. And she’d hurt him. Regret sliced through her. Dropping her gaze to the notebook, she read what Justin had scribbled on the page.

  I tried and tried to play the chords she taught me

  I was just a kid learning the hard way

  More than anything, I wanted to make her happy

  For my sister, I’d practice night and day

  Sayin’— Next time I’ll do better

  Experience is a teacher

  A second chance is all I need

  If you’ll believe in me

  I won’t let you down

  Oh, I promise I’ll do better

  Next time.

  A dull ache lodged in her heart. “You wrote this about Rebecca.”

  He angled his head and released a slow, deep breath. “Yeah. Right after she died.”

  Tess read aloud. “ ‘Well, we grew up, and big sister got married. She was just a wife learning the hard way. More than anything, she wanted him to be happy. For her husband, she’d give both night and day. Saying, “Next time I’ll do better. Experience is a teacher. A second chance is all I need” . . .’ ”

  She stopped when her voice broke, then with a deep breath, she went on to the third verse. “ ‘The first time he got angry, she forgave him. But in the end she learned the hard way. How I wish I’d done more to convince her. Not to give the man who’d hurt her one more day. But she believed him when he’d say, “Next time I’ll do better. Experience is a teacher. A second chance is all that I need. If you’ll believe in me, I won’t let you down. Oh, I promise I’ll do better. Next time.” Now when the cold night wind blows. I only hope Rebecca knows. What I’d give if she could have had a next time.’ ”

  Tess sat silently, absorbing the love and grief that had prompted Justin to write the song. Finally she whispered, “You know, you gave me a next time. You gave me a reason to want a second chance. You’ve given me what Rebecca was denied. In a way, I feel like Rebecca gave it to me too.”

  Justin turned his gaze up to find hers. His expression reflected a degree of surprise, a touch of sadness. “That’s what I prayed for the night she died. A second chance to do better. The opportunity to make up to Rebecca for not being there for her. God sent you to me. I know he did. You’ve helped heal me.” His gaze bore into her. “Do you know why I fell in love with you?”

  Her heartbeat tripped. “Why?”

  “Besides the fact that you’re the best-looking woman I ever met, and you have a smile that could stop traffic . . .” He paused, and the smile he sent her felt like a soft caress. “I loved your heart.”

  His voice and gentle expression held her mesmerized.

  “Despite all the reasons you had to not trust the world, despite all the pain you’d suffered, despite the right you had to harden your heart and be bitter, you didn’t. The woman who offered me a ride that rainy day was trusting and kind and generous and sweet and witty and—”

  She held up a hand to stop him. “I think I was naive and foolish and sympathetic and frightened, and you just saw all my flaws in a positive light, being the optimist that you are. I had selfish motives for picking you up.” She ducked her head and bit her lip.

  “And you don’t give yourself enough credit.” Justin pushed himself out of the armchair and knelt in front of her. “Don’t underestimate yourself, Tess. Randall has dimmed your vision of your worth, but I can see all you have to give, all the virtue in you. You’re a warm, intelligent, wonderful woman, and don’t you forget that.” He pressed his hands to her cheeks and lifted her face.

  She couldn’t hide from the intensity in his eyes, and her heart turned over. Her troubled conscience split wide and poured at his feet. “For so long, I turned my back on what I knew was wrong. I gave up my self-respect. I sold what was good about me to survive. How do I ever forgive myself for that?”

  “One day at a time, baby. You did what you had to, what you felt was best at the time. But you didn’t lose everything good to him, or you wouldn’t be here now. You have courage and strength and a sense of justice that led you to act when the time was right.” He stroked her cheek. “Remind yourself of that when you want to doubt what you have inside.”

  She gave him a weak smile, and his mouth descended to hers. His kiss filled her with warmth and hope and promise. When the tip of his tongue traced her lips, the warmth heated, and the most basic of longings burgeoned from inside.

  Easing back onto the bed, she took Justin with her, and his body blanketed hers while their hunger for each other grew. As always, Justin’s patience and attention to her fulfillment awed her and touched her heart. His hands stroked gently, slowly, and his kiss explored intimately, thoroughly, until Tess quivered with desire to be one with him.

  And as before, when Justin joined their bodies, she experienced the union to her core, in her spirit. Each time Justin made love to her, she lost a little more of her heart and soul to him, just as he gave his own heart and soul to her.

  He became an extension of her, an amazing phenomenon Tess wanted to spend the rest of her life exploring. He stirred to life the hope that she could find all the good in her once more and cling to those qualities when doubt reared its head.

  In Justin she’d found her safe harbor, her home. But more importantly, he’d helped her find herself.

  She realized then the reason she withheld the words of love he needed to hear. The gift of love he gave her was whole, unblemished, complete. She wanted to offer the same to him. But Randall still haunted her. Before she could offer her love to Justin, she had to truly free herself from Randall and his hold on her soul.

  ***

  Brian waited patiently while the man at the
five-and-dime studied the picture of Tess.

  “Pretty woman,” the man said. “Why is it you’re looking for her?”

  “Long story,” Brian replied with a sigh. “Have you seen her or the other guy around here in the past couple of days?”

  The store clerk handed the pictures back to Brian. “Afraid not. I’d remember a woman who looked like that.”

  Brian huffed in frustration. If he’d shown the picture to one person, he’d shown it to 500, and he sensed that his time was running out. “Okay, thanks anyway.”

  When he climbed back into his car, he crossed the address off the list of stores and restaurants that sold the postcard of the National Monument.

  The secretary at the small printing company that distributed the postcards had helped Brian construct the list he worked from, but after a full day of showing Justin’s and Tess’s pictures around town, Brian’s patience had worn thin.

  The last three names on his list included a diner near the interstate, and since he’d skipped lunch, he decided he’d visit the diner next.

  Once there, he noticed the rack of postcards at the cash register before he slid into one of the booths.

  A waitress with her hair pulled back in a ponytail handed him a menu.

  “Hey, I like the haircut,” she said and smiled. “But it does sort of make you look older. Don’t you think?”

  Brain looked at the waitress. “How old do I look?”

  “About thirty-five, maybe thirty-six. I like it better long, but then that’s not for me to decide, huh? What does your girlfriend think? She is your girlfriend, right?”

  “Who?”

  The waitress tapped her pencil against her order pad. “Who do you think?”

  “I really don’t know.” He watched her face as she narrowed her gaze and wrinkled her nose.

  “Hey, whatever. Forget I asked. You want the regular? Chocolate chip pancakes with extra syrup?”

  “God, no! Why would you say that?” His stomach turned over at the thought of so much sugar. He only knew one person who liked sweets enough to eat a meal like that.