Once Upon a True Love's Kiss

by Julie Johnstone

  "All right, Julianna. I'll see you tomorrow."

  She jerked her head and raced out the study door, through the dark and silent house, and into the night. Lightning illuminated the sky, followed by the booming sound of thunder. Rain suddenly poured down from overheard, but she was already running toward her house and it had nothing to do with fear of getting wet. Her feet pounded against the pebbles of the path that led from her house to his. Twice, she almost fell as the moss-covered rocks grew slippery from the downpour. The wind slashed across her face as she ran and whipped her hair across her wet skin. Her breath came in short, ragged, gasps, and a consuming pain battered her heart.

  She pounded on the door of her home and fairly shoved past the butler as she raced inside, dripping a puddle of water behind her. She was halfway up the stairs before she realized someone stood, looming at the top. A candle flickered low and moved up through the darkness to illuminate Audrey's astonished face.

  Julianna tripped on her dress and went sprawling to her knees on the staircase. Footsteps tapped down the stairs, and suddenly Audrey was kneeling by her. "What's wrong? You raced in here as if you were running from something."

  "I am," Julianna huffed and pushed into a sitting position. She shoved her wet hair out of her face.

  Audrey's eyes grew wider than they already were. "Who are you running from, or should I ask, what? The weather? Were you trying to beat the storm?"

  Julianna eyed her friend, the only person in this world she possibly dare admit the truth to. "It's not the weather. I'm running from myself. And Nash. Though, come to think of it, he didn't give chase." The attempt at humor was helping to keep more annoying tears at bay.

  Audrey wrinkled her brow. "I don't understand."

  "Neither do I," Julianna blurted. "All I wanted was one night of passion, yet my heart— Well, it hurts terribly."

  "I see," Audrey said, grinning. She gave Julianna a knowing look. "Did Mr. Wolverton offer marriage along with this night of passion?"

  Julianna nodded, refusing to feel bashful with Audrey. Her friend had led the most scandalous past, and Julianna seriously doubted her one night with Nash would shock Audrey.

  "Thank goodness! Then I've rushed here for nothing. And through this dreadful rain, too."

  Julianna stilled, not caring for the words Audrey had just spoken. "What are you doing here, anyway?"

  "Your brother-in-law came to see us yesterday. He overheard some woman in town talking about a little girl's wonderful new tutor and the woman said it was you. It seems you failed to tell your brother-in-law all the details of your departure."

  Julianna pressed her fingertips to her aching head. "I knew he'd protest and try to make me feel guilty for taking a position and not marrying."

  "Darling, I hate to tell you this, but he is not going to simply try and make you feel guilty. He'll be here tomorrow with Lord Cameron in tow."

  "What? Why would he do such a—" Julianna's question died on her lips. "Oh dear heavens. He cannot really expect me to marry Lord Cameron."

  "I do believe that's exactly what he expects. He made it clear to me yesterday that he believes your taking a position as a tutor will destroy Liza's future, as well as the future of his child. Their names will be tainted by your working or some such nonsense as that. I came to warn you, so you could be prepared, but clearly there is no need as you are going to marry Mr. Wolverton, so all is solved."

  "I am not marrying Nash," Julianna groaned and shoved to her feet. Without waiting for Audrey to stand, Julianna started up the stairs.

  Audrey caught her at the top and huffing out a breath, fell into step beside her as she entered her bedchamber.

  "I want to go to sleep, Audrey. Might we talk in the morning?"

  "No," Audrey responded, plopping unceremoniously onto Julianna's bed. "Why would you not marry Mr. Wolverton? It's obvious that you care for him."

  "That's just it!" Julianna screeched, not meaning to lose control but unable to help it. "Today I care for him, and tomorrow it's a little bit more, and then a little bit more. Before you know it, I love him and can't imagine living my life without him, and just when I get good and comfortable and irrevocably entangled with him maybe he'll die from sickness, or a carriage accident, or…or a duel."

  Audrey quirked an eyebrow. "A duel for your honor? My, you have changed in this future you are imagining. You're quite the hoyden in years to come."

  "Oh, do be quiet," Julianna snapped, swiping at the tears coursing freely down her face. She slumped onto the bed beside Audrey. "I don't want to marry him because I know I could love him."

  "Darling." Audrey hugged Julianna's shoulder. "Are you sure you don't already?"

  There was the awful truth of it. She wasn't sure. "No." She shook her head. "Actually, I'm quite sure I've already started to, which is why I must stop it now before the love grows too strong and becomes the kind that will kill me if I lose it."

  Audrey grasped Julianna's hand in hers. "Darling, you've survived losing Henry."

  "Just barely," Julianna whispered and looked down at her lap. "I loved Henry with all my heart but not with all my passion. With Nash, well, I'm afraid it would be both, and I simply cannot face the possibility of risking my heart in that way."

  "Perhaps you should sleep on it after all," Audrey said. "I'm sure tomorrow you will change your mind."

  "No. I won't. Tomorrow morning I'm going to go see him and tell him I can no longer be his tutor, nor can I marry him."

  "Oh, darling, you're going to break his heart."

  "No, no, I won't. He doesn't love me."

  Audrey snorted. "I don't believe that for a second."

  "It's true," Julianna protested. "He has not once said so to me. And if he felt that way why wouldn't he tell me?"

  "That's something you need to ask yourself."

  "Mama!" came Liza's scared voice from the hall. "Mama, nightmare!"

  Pushing her concerns to the back of her mind, Julianna jumped up and went to care for her daughter.

  After Forever: Chapter Ten

  IT HAD BEEN TWELVE HOURS SINCE Nash had last seen Julianna. He stopped pacing his study and glanced out the window through the rain to the path he had followed her down last night. Twice he had almost raced to help her when he had thought she was going to lose her balance in her desperate flight, but she'd stayed upright and his instincts had told him that she was running from him. Whether she was running from what they had done, her feelings for him, or both of those things, he didn't know.

  He hoped it was her feelings for him because that meant she realized she cared for him and caring could lead to love. He certainly didn't want her to be regretful or ashamed of the passion they had shared, especially since they were going to be married.

  He loved her. As cracked as it was, he loved Julianna though he'd only known her for such a short time. She'd captured his admiration the day he had met her, and not long after, she'd earned his trust, and without him realizing it, she had seized his heart and now held it in the palm of her hand. He was hers, body and soul, if only she wanted him in return.

  He'd been a fool to ever think he could settle for only having her desire. Maybe he was still being a fool believing he could win her, but he couldn't help it. The rain battered the house as he stared out the window. How long should he give her to come to him? How long could he stand not to go to her? His instincts told him to allow her as much time as he possibly could.

  Sitting down at his desk, he picked up some contracts he needed to read, but between his lack of sleep and the dull ache that had been present in his head since yesterday, concentrating was hard. And it was bloody hot in his office today, which was odd because the rain and lack of sun should have cooled the house. Yet, his brow was damp, he felt clammy all over and breathing was difficult. A cough, sounding much like the one Maggie had just gotten over, rumbled from him.

  He leaned back in his chair and closed his eyes, and as he did, a scratch came at the door followed by Reed's voic
e.

  "You have visitors, Mr. Wolverton."

  Nash jumped up, his heart racing. It had to be Julianna and little Liza. "Send them in," he called, and started once again to pace the room. Was Julianna bringing Liza with her a sign that she was afraid to face him alone? Before he could answer his own question, the door opened and Barrows entered followed by Trevelle. Nash stared at the two men, Julianna's brother-in-law and the lord that had dared to ask Julianna to marry him. Why the devil were they here? Together. So early in the morning. And in such bad weather so far away from Town. An uneasy feeling gripped him.

  "To what do I owe the pleasure of this social call?"

  Barrows narrowed his gaze on Nash. "This is no social call. This is a friendly warning."

  Nash eyed Trevelle for a moment to gauge if he seemed as irritable as Barrows was. The man slicked his wet hair back, frowned slightly, and then quirked his mouth. He appeared more ill at ease than anything. Focusing once again on Barrows, Nash folded his arms across his chest and widened his stance. If the man thought to intimidate him, he clearly was not thinking.

  Barrows coughed uneasily as they eyed each other.

  Nash leaned toward the man, pleased to see Barrows flinch. He let Julianna's brother-in-law squirm around a bit before speaking. "In general, I think it's safe to say a warning cannot really be considered friendly since the very nature of the word warning implies a threat when delivered in the manner you just conveyed it."

  "Fine," Barrows snapped. "Then let's call it a threat. I overheard your nanny talking in Town. She said Julianna is working for you as a tutor. You will cease employing my sister-in-law instantly or you will find your club in deep trouble."

  His nanny? The man had to mean Esther. Nash shrugged. "I'm not that concerned about the club. I planned on selling it now that I'm in the shipping business."

  Barrows face turned red, and he took a step toward Nash, but Trevelle stopped the man with a hand to his arm and slid between the two men. "Listen, Wolverton. I like you, so please try not to take what I say as an insult, but it won't do for Julianna to work for you as your daughter's tutor. As much as I hate to say it, there are people in the ton that would ostracize her for working, and though she has apparently decided she doesn't care, those same people will also shun her daughter for what they see as Julianna's social downfall. Her daughter having to suffer for Julianna's actions would break her heart. She clearly hasn't thought everything through because I know she would never endanger Liza's chances at a good life."

  "And her activities will reflect on me, my wife, and our unborn child as well," Barrows added.

  "Cease talking, Barrows," Trevelle snapped, without even turning to look at the man.

  "I agree that Julianna does not need to work for me," Nash said, enjoying the twin looks of surprise that graced the men's faces. "But you don't have to be worried because Julianna is going to be my wife."

  Trevelle's mouth gaped.

  "The devil you say!" Barrows exploded.

  Nash clenched his teeth together. So much for hearty congratulations. "I believe I spoke clearly."

  "She cannot marry you." Barrows pointed a finger at Trevelle. "She is going to marry him."

  "That's a lie," Nash said, pleased his voice sounded calm since he wanted to make Barrows bleed at this moment. Perhaps Trevelle, too. He eyed the man. "She turned you down."

  Trevelle nodded. "She did, but then she sent me this." He reached into his pocket and pulled out a crumpled letter.

  Nash didn't wait for the letter to be handed to him. He snatched it from Trevelle and yanked it open. Only eight words were on the paper, but each one was like a hard blow to his gut. He blinked to make sure he had read correctly. His vision was unclear for some reason. The words appeared doubled and swam in and out of focus. He had to strain to make them line up, but damn it, when they did they still said the same thing.

  I've reconsidered your proposal. Please come to me at once.

  Yours,

  Julianna

  The word yours pounded through his skull much the way the rain pounded against the roof. He curled his hand into a fist, crumpling the letter as he did so. "When did you receive this?" His voice sounded distant to him. Almost muffled. Maybe it was the anger.

  "Yesterday," Trevelle replied. "I contacted Barrows, and we came immediately."

  Nash tried to think, but his thoughts collided against each other as if his head was full of cotton and there was not enough room for order of any kind.

  Julianna would have had to have sent it soon after she'd arrived here. That would mean she had been knowingly lying to him and deceiving him. It would mean she had never intended to marry him and that she had used him. He refused to believe her capable of such a thing. There had to be some sort of explanation. Maybe she had written the letter, but then realized how drawn she was to him and had not thought to write Trevelle again and tell him not to come. That had to be it.

  Street urchin. The old voice that used to haunt him as a child and very young man whispered in his head. The room seemed to tilt slightly as the voice whispered again. By blow.

  The room sloped again, and Nash stayed on his feet by sheer luck. By God, he was going to black out. He'd gone down once in a fight. Only once. But he'd had that same floating feeling he had now, and he'd seen the same damned stars dancing in front of him that were there at this moment. His vision started to tunnel, becoming dark at the edges.

  "Get out," he snapped. He'd be damned if he was going to go down in front of Barrows and Trevelle.

  "Wolverton, I'm sorry," Trevelle said. "Did she tell you she would marry you?"

  Damnation. His gut clenched. She never had uttered her agreement to marry him. He couldn't get into this now. Later. Tonight, when he felt better, he'd go to Julianna and she would explain, and everything would be all right.

  He shook his head. "Go," he growled.

  As the door clicked behind them, the room jerked violently, and as Nash fell to his knees and then his chest, darkness settled in.

  "I DID NOT WRITE to you," Julianna snapped while glaring at Lord Cameron. She didn't even feel the slightest remorse about being so churlish. She had already told him the very same thing moments ago when he and David had met her at the door as she was on the way out. She'd spent all morning gathering enough courage to go see Nash and tell him she could not marry him, and the last thing she wanted was to be forestalled by such ridiculousness.

  How she wished she had not sent Audrey home this morning. Her friend would have known the right words to propel these two men straight back to Town. But Julianna had wanted to end things with Nash without an audience.

  Lord Cameron's brows came together in a deep frown before he turned a murderous look on David. "Barrows, you better hope you had nothing—"

  "My lady," the butler called as he raced into the room. "I'm sorry to intrude but Mr. Wolverton's cook is at the door, and she says he's very ill. She wants to know if you can—"

  "Yes," Julianna cried, shoving past the butler. She got three steps out of the library when a hand clamped around her arm and halted her progress.

  "Let his servants care for him, my dear," David said.

  She yanked her arm from David's hold, desperate to go to Nash. "If they thought they could manage, they wouldn't have called me."

  "Then I'll come with you."

  "No!" Nash certainly wouldn't want David, who had treated him rather poorly when they met, to see him in a weakened state. "Don't be silly. You stay here, rest and freshen up from your travels. I'll be back soon."

  David's mouth parted, as if were going to protest, but he finally clinched his jaw shut with a huff. "We have much to discuss when you return. Like this nonsense about your taking a position."

  "All right, David." She would have agreed to a pact with the devil at this moment just to get to Nash faster.

  As she rushed out the door, she thought she heard Lord Cameron's voice raised in anger, but she wasn't going to spare even a second to tu
rn back around and find out why. She had a suspicion that David was somehow behind the letter to Lord Cameron.

  She met the cook at the front door, and together they raced to Nash's house. By the time she reached his bedroom, she was panting for breath. He lay atop his bed, eyes closed and a sheen of sweat covering his brow. His butler hovered in the corner but came forward as she entered.

  "I found him passed out in his study, and the footman and I and carried him up here. I'm sorry to have disturbed you, my lady, but with Esther gone I didn't know what to do."

  Julianna laid a hand on his forehead and gasped at the heat that met her touch. Bending down, she gently shook his shoulder, but he did not stir. She listened to his breathing a moment, which sounded wheezy to her, much like Maggie's and Liza's had sounded when they had been sick.

  Relief flooded through her. They'd gotten better, and so would he. Wouldn't he? She studied his face for a moment, noting the rapid movement of his eyes under his lids.

  "Nash, please wake up," she whispered in his ear. Neither of the children had passed out with the sickness. The realization did not comfort her.

  He flinched and coughed, a loud harsh sound, but his eyes did not open. A stark memory of Henry's eyes rapidly moving under lids that never opened again filled her head. She had the overwhelming urge to flee the room and the possibility that Nash might die. Instead, she stood and faced Mr. Reed. "Send the footman to fetch the physician immediately."

  The butler nodded and left the room to do her bidding. She turned back to Nash, angry that she had no real knowledge of how to care for a sick person. All she knew to do was what the physician had told her to do for Henry, and that hadn't worked. A sob lodged in her throat and made it ache. She glanced down at Nash's large frame. He appeared indestructible because of his sheer size, but that was an illusion. The strongest man was no match for death. She bit hard on her lip and forced the thoughts away. They were doing no good.

  Rolling up her sleeves, she pulled a chair beside the bed and then retrieved the washbasin and set it down on the stand by Nash's bed. As she loosened his shirt and her fingertips grazed the muscles of his chest, a sob escaped her. She clenched her teeth together on any further hysterics. She could do this. She could sit here and sponge a man who might die and take another piece of her heart with him.