Sleeping himself, Gunner doesn’t know Rose is crying. It is heart wrenching that I can not allow myself to enter her room because my self-control has limits. Instead, I sit on the roof by her open window. No sign of the Demons, but the Guardians never leave us. There are no reports of other attacks throughout the town either, but Parker says we can not let down our guard.
The next night is another no-show for the Clones, and Rose is even worse. Gunner takes care of her mom and the kids while Rose stays in her room, deteriorating.
Gunner appears as torn as I am while he reads to Rose in her bed. Her head rests on his chest, searching for comfort that I am starting to believe she won’t find without me. Unbelievable amounts of guilt plague my conscience. I should have never allowed contact.
The following day I do not sleep much. Instead, I find myself perched in her tree watching Rose continue to crumble. With the sun up, Rose’s body is not in danger, but her heart is. I’m consumed with blaming myself.
Gunner seems distant as he sits in the rocking chair on Rose’s back porch with a package in his lap. Rose approaches. Gunner observes her arms wrapped around herself and smiles. “I got you a little something that might come in handy about now.” Rose opens her mouth, but he says, “And don’t start with me about spending money on you. I wanted you to have something for your birthday from just me.”
She weakly smiles and nods.
Gunner pats his lap. She crawls into it and opens the gift. It’s a blue knitted blanket with a white rose on it. She kisses him. Gunner covers her then holds her, rocks her the way I wish I could, but I have done enough damage. Blame and guilt turn into frustration and anger as I think about how fate brought Rose and me together, made her irresistible to me, then ripped her away.
When Gunner tilts his face to Rose’s and another kiss takes place, pressure in me explodes. I feel an energy burst escape. Again, birds rush from the tree.
“Ryder! What are you doing?” Sage climbs into my tree from another, tying his long, blond hair back.
“I’m dying inside—”
I stop when I hear Gunner say, “I have another surprise for you.”
Blaze joins us in the tree, and we all listen to Gunner planning on taking Rose out for the night. Blaze is pleased. “This is perfect. Just what we needed for tonight. Good job, Gunner.” When he sees my displeased expression, he explains. “Ryder, Rose will be safe while we feed the Demons bait. My mate! I would like you focused on Morning Star so she lives through this.”
I’m ashamed of being so cold about his sacrifice. “Blaze, I am sorry. You are right, and I give you my word. I will be very focused on Morning Star.”
He grits his teeth. “My. World.”
I stare at Rose. “I understand what you mean.”
We watch Gunner assist Rose upstairs. She is lethargic and not excited about her plans for this evening. She tiredly crawls into bed. Gunner covers her with the new blanket. He tells her to nap and that he will be back tonight. The kids are in school. Her mother is resting. The house is quiet.
Whether or not I am allowed in Rose’s life, I can not let her be so miserable. I know what I have to do. I nod to Blaze. “Morning Star will be returned without a mark. Go spend some time with her. I’ll be right behind you.”
Sage shakes his head. “Ah, I think—”
“That you trust your brother, Warrior?” I try to sound convincing.
It didn’t work.
“Not really. Twenty minutes, if I don’t see you—”
“You have permission to beat me down.”
When Sage and Blaze are out of sight and Rose is sleeping, I run across her yard with speed to not be seen by the human eye. It’s day, and I am breaking yet another rule. On her porch roof, crouching at her window, my heart pounds and demands I fix what I have broken. Slowly, I creep in her window and kneel at her bed. “I want you to be happy.”
Rose inhales deeply. “You’re back.”
“Yes, and know, dear Rose, I will never leave you. I will always be here for you but”—I force the hardest words I have ever spoken out loud —“you need to let me go.” I fist her blanket as I offer the female I love to another. “Be with Gunner. He loves you.” I begin to choke. “I love you too and want you to be young and… free.” I grab her hand and hold it to my lips as I give up my own needs for her. “Wake up happy, Rose.” My eyes close in prayer. “Be happy, my love.”
Chapter Eight
Rose
My eyes open, and air rushes into my lungs, along with happiness. It is such a relief that I want to cry joy-filled tears. Loved. I feel loved again. I jump out of bed with energy that has escaped me the last few days. I’d been feeling a void clinging to me—haunted by something I was missing—yet it felt as if it was right in front of me for the taking. It felt like going without air, and it was causing a crack in my soul, as if I was constantly witnessing someone else’s hurt. Excruciating pain had pounded through me at an unexplainable rate. I kept finding myself sitting up in my bed, legs pulled to my chest, my arms wrapped around them, trying to console the inconsolable ache in my soul.
But not anymore. Now I feel great!
When Gunner’s headlights come up my driveway I run out of the front door. “Bye, Mama! Don’t do anything I wouldn’t do with Mr. Hayes.” I’m on a high from my nap, and it is compounded with Mama doing so much better. After you lose one parental figure, and within a year, the only one left is saying goodbye, your world crumbles. Now, when hope can be alive again—because that parent is recovering—I feel like a teenager, one with no worries. I feel free.
Mr. Hayes gets out of Gunner’s old, green truck and heads up my steps. “I’m here to help your mama.”
In passing, I kiss his cheek. “Thank you for taking such good care of her.” He shyly smiles.
Gunner looks surprised at how excited I am, waving at him. He opens the driver door and slowly walks to me with a slack jaw. “You look so… beautiful.” When I start rushing down the porch steps to him, Gunner runs to meet me, catching me as I leap into his arms.
Gunner swings me around as I tell him, “This is such a good idea!”
He laughs. “But you don’t even know where we’re going yet.”
I tighten my hold on his neck. “It doesn’t matter. I’m with you.” I pull back to see his warm eyes. Staring at him, I slowly lean in to kiss him. Our lips meet, and we both try to deepen the kiss, but it just goes… awkward. My tongue struggles with his and makes me realize my lack of passion again.
After a moment of trying, he pulls his face from mine and stares at me some more. “Is it… weird for you to… kiss me?”
Gunner lets my feet touch the ground as I think about it. Being honest is the only way I know how to talk to him. “Well, maybe ’cause it’s still new for us. Is it… weird for you?”
He pushes hair behind my ear. “You’re the closest person in my life. I-I can honestly say that I cannot function without you.”
I nod, wholeheartedly agreeing with the statement. “I second that. Must have you, Bubba.”
“So it makes sense that we do this, right?”
And there it is: voiced doubt.
Driving in silence is saying a lot. Gunner and I are at a crossroads, and we both seem unsure what path to take. There is so much at stake. The wrong decision could change our friendship, and I think that would kill us both. Gunner suddenly pulls his truck off the road and parks. He turns to face me. “I have to have you in my life, my whole life Rose, for as long as there is air in my lungs. Do you understand?”
I start crying. “Y-Yes—whole life.”
He pulls me to him in a powerful embrace. “I’m sorry. Don’t cry. Damn, this is supposed to be your night. I just feel—I just feel like I may be losing you.”
I pull back and wipe tears. “Never. No mat
ter how we decide to move forward—friends or more—it’s together. Deal?” With relief, he quickly pulls my lips to his. It isn’t passionate, but it’s full of love.
When we pull up to Mountain Café—only restaurant in our tiny town—I see vehicles I recognize. “Hey, isn’t that Darren’s truck?”
Gunner opens the passenger door, showing unusual chivalry, and acts playfully clueless. “Huh, not too sure.” He looks in the bed of his truck. “Sam, stay.”
“Why’d you bring him anyway?”
“Looked like he wanted a ride.” Gunner winks and opens the diner’s door for me. Even though I can see everyone through the big glass windows, I jump when they all scream, “Surprise! Happy birthday!”
Holding his hand, I smile ear to ear. “Gunner Hayes, what have you done?”
My boss grabs me for a tight embrace. I see friends from high school, some I haven’t seen in a long time. “Archer and Betty!” Everyone! It feels so good to be young and happy. The only ones missing are Wade, Lulu, Mr. Hayes, and my mom, but I understand them staying home with her. Even with her feeling better, people are too frightened to be near someone with the illness.
“Aren’t you excited?” Shelly pulls me from my thoughts.
“Well, Gunner and I are taking it slow.”
The freckles on her nose wrinkle. “Take what slow?” She points to a seat along joined tables with balloon centerpieces. “Birthday girl sits here.” For a split second, I consider allowing myself to feel unworthy of the attentions, but it’s too exciting to bother with diving into self-pity. I’m deep in a blissful moment that Gunner, thoughtfully, has put together for me and decide to enjoy every minute of it.
I take my seat. “Shelly, what are you talking about?”
Gunner kisses my cheek. “Haven’t told her yet.” Harry and his chef hat try to take the chair next to mine. Gunner punches his shoulder. “Harry, have you lost your damn mind?”
Harry laughs at Gunner, knowing it wasn’t going to fly, then kisses my cheek. “Happy birthday, girl.”
“Thank you!” Gunner sits down next to me, and I meet his eyes. “What is Shelly talking about?”
“Ordering food.”
I smack him. “Later, dimwit. What is Shelly going on about?”
He grins, showing me his adorable dimple. “Old-school Manhunt in the woods.”
Now I understand Sam coming with us.
Shelly squeals, “Running, hiding, and playing in the woods. Bonfire and loud music, just like old times.”
Woods. My body quivers at the thought of going into the woods. Good and bad shivers. My thoughts are interrupted again when the diner’s lights dim, and my boss carries a cake through the kitchen doors. Twenty candles glow. Everyone sings, “Happy Birthday…”
My eyes water as I hide in his chest. “Gunner! Cake before dinner?”
He lifts my face and kisses me in front of everyone. “Happy birthday, Rose.”
Chapter Nine
Ryder
At the village, Parker prepares us, giving out orders with strict instructions. Blaze puts Rose’s scarf on Morning Star with an even stricter lecture. “I mean it. You don’t stop running. No matter what you see or hear.” His hands shake as he puts the hat on Morning Star’s head, trying to cover her white hair that doesn’t resemble Rose’s in the slightest. I start to believe Blaze is not going to be able to follow through with the plan. His voice trembles with adrenaline. “You just run as fast as you can to me. I will be waiting. The Guardians will lead those bastards away from you.”
Morning Star stares with wide violet eyes. “Blaze—you’re—you’re Tying to me.”
Parker glances at Blaze. “Oh, shit.” Then he whispers something to shocked Sage, Hunter, and Chase.
Blaze touches his neck and sees his pearly, fluorescent green blood on his shaking fingertips. Instinctually, he reaches for her. Morning Star’s hand grasps his wrist so he can’t touch her face. “I can’t let you mark me, Blaze. The Demons will know.” Blaze’s tortured expression changes into that of a rabid animal. Morning Star speaks softly. “Blaze, I will run like the wind, straight into your safe arms.”
Blaze has her wrapped up in his arms in a blur of speed. “Parker! I can’t do this.”
“I’m seeing that. Sorry, kid. We will help you through the repercussions of Tying, but Morning Star is the fastest female. Isolde said she will be fine, or I wouldn’t ask this of her.”
As gentle as Morning Star seems, she and her brother Sage have a very long, pure bloodline. Generally, females are slower and weaker than males, but Morning Star leaves us all in the dust with her lightning speed.
Blaze’s eyes shut as he squeezes her even tighter. “You’ll be fine. You’ll be fine.” I think he’s whispering to himself more than his mate. Inwardly, I am doing the same. Rose will be fine. Rose will be fine.
“Alright, Warriors, it’s time. Ryder, get Morning Star to Rose’s house.” Parker stalks toward Blaze.
I walk to Morning Star and wait for Blaze to release her. She kisses him and takes a deep breath. Blaze refuses to let go. I reach out my hand but stop when a growl threatens me. Nora shakes her head. “This is no good.”
Sage ties back his hair. “I love you, my brave sister, but I have to tackle your mate now.”
Blaze growls with hatred. “Don’t. Fucking. Touch. Me.” Morning Star kisses the possessed-looking Blaze, who wickedly eyes the Warriors surrounding him—trying to soothe him—but his arms tighten around her as his chest rumbles another warning. Hunter nods to Sage. Sage links his arms through Blaze’s and pulls backward. Hunter, Parker, and Chase join the struggle.
“Blaze, you have to let her go.”
“Hunter, help me hold him.”
I take Morning Star’s hand as they fight with the florescent green bull. “I’m so sorry, Blaze, but nothing will happen to her.” I pull Morning Star away as Blaze is forcefully taken to the ground, seeming stronger than I have ever seen him.
Parker fights an arm that has gone rogue. “Don’t make me strap you down, male.”
“Strap him?” Hunter struggles with kicking legs. “We’re going to have to knock him out!”
I notice Morning Star reluctantly looking back to Blaze as he bellows, “Give her to me! Ryder! Give me my female!” His desperation almost compels me to follow his most serious command.
I skfen to him, With all I am, I will keep her safe, and continue my journey with Morning Star, entering a blanket of trees.
I know Morning Star is also Reflecting because Blaze’s voice carries through the distance, “No… No! Come back to me! I love you, too. Morning Staaarrrr… come back…”
Linked male and females can skfen privately. We can feel their emotions but not hear thoughts meant only for each other. And the emotion Blaze sets off tells me, if the strongest, oldest Warriors were not holding Blaze down, he would be in my face, fulfilling his threats.
Morning Star and I head deeper into the woods. “Thank you for doing this. I am sorry for the torment it causes your mate.”
She kisses my hand. I refuse to let go of hers because my closest ally trusted me with his one and only. She smiles with a hint of Isolde’s wisdom. “I will always do what the people need. The Prophecy is life or death, as you are well aware.”
I inhale deeply. “Yes. Yes, I am.” I grab my necklace with my free hand, thinking of Rose’s. “Morning Star, what does an upside-down triangle mean?”
“Symbols have different meanings, depending on tribes and religions. But a universal one—in my opinion—for an upside triangle is female and lunar. Represents mother earth, water, rain, and my favorite, grace. My aunt told me about a special female who used to wear this charm you speak of. Isolde said she was full of magical grace.”
“What do you mean she used to be?”
&nb
sp; Morning Star ignores me, which is something else she has learned from her aunt. “Do you doubt your future, Ryder?”
“Wait, Morning Star, I think—”
“Do you?”
It is becoming clear I am not going to get an answer, nor will I have the chance to tell her about Rose’s charm, so I choose to answer Morning Star’s question. “Uh, I don’t think it is as much doubt as it is pain. I have been put before the most beautiful light I have ever seen, but I’m not to touch it or feel it shine on me.”
“Ryder, sometimes the light cannot reach or shine on you because you are without movement. Your own light has become still in the agony you’re holding on to. Surrender to the circumstance, and maybe—just maybe—with no resistance, the light will find its way to you.”
Even though Morning Star and I are around the same age, we are spiritually on different levels. While Blaze and I trained incredibly hard during our whole childhood, Morning Star, along with other little girls, had more one-on-one time with Isolde. Everything Morning Star says feels right to me, like she’s putting me back on track, just as she was trained to do.
I am, once again, aligned with my purpose. “Morning Star, as of this moment, I release my hold on this pain eating at me and causing more conflict. You have reminded me to believe in the bigger picture. As long as I am around Rose, even from afar, I will be thankful.” Weight falls off my shoulders, and of course, forest fairies fly around me for confirmation.
She watches them. “There is the Ryder I love and admire. Follow true to your purpose, and the light will follow you.”
Morning Star—the bait—sits in the dark on Rose’s back porch. Mr. Hayes and Rose’s mama are busy bathing Louisa and Wade. They don’t notice Morning Star. I focus on our surroundings, watching over her. We can’t have any other Guardians around. We need the Demons to believe we thought they had given up. Suddenly, the forest goes quiet. I skfen, Morning Star, they’re coming.
Rain (Stranger in the Woods Book 1) Page 8