by C. M. Steele
We heard the shower go off, so I pulled her outside the gym door and kissed the fuck out of her before walking away.
It was a hard way to say goodbye, but it was for the best. I still wanted to knock him out, but knowing she wasn’t out meeting him intentionally made it easier. I needed to find out if he or his parents were trying to run into her or was it a coincidence. I had a feeling it wasn’t, but I would figure it out soon. I could have easily kept her here, but I didn’t want her to regret it later. As much as it hurt, it was necessary.
7
Vanessa
The moment I landed in Illinois, I texted Tim. I miss you already. How am I supposed to do this? This really sucks.
It took him over an hour to text me back. Fear crept up at me. I was expecting an immediate reply. I miss you, too. Are you in your dorm?
Yes, I’m home. I replied
I was feeling like a really needy bitch when I sat there for over twenty minutes waiting for a text back. You’re not home. You’re in your dorm. Home will be where we live together.
Don’t make me fall in love with you? I replied as a tease because I was head over heels in love with him, but I wouldn’t admit it.
Already there. I gasped after reading it. He knew I loved him and he sounded so cocky about it. “Thanks for not saying it back jackass,” I hissed aloud.
I didn’t bother to respond, instead I hit my pillow because it was already ten at night and I had my first day of classes, all of which were scheduled for early morning. Today was one of those days where I wished I had afternoon classes.
~~~~~
I woke up the next morning in a rush and left my dorm without my phone. It took me until I was walking into my first class that I realized that I forgot it. “Shit,” I said out loud, getting everyone to turn and stare at me. I shrugged and said, “Sorry, I forgot my phone.”
“I hate when that happens. When do you get to go back to your place?” the professor asked.
“I won’t have time until after one pm, and I still have lots of books to buy today.”
“Well, if you need a printout I can help you.”
“Thank you, sir, but I have the list,” I said with a smile.
“Any time, Miss…”
“Vanessa James.”
“Vanessa, it’s nice to meet you. I’m professor Martin Mann. Welcome to Math 103.” The smile he gave me was so friendly. He must be from around the area. I felt like those that lived around here were so nice.
~~~~~
It was almost two when I finally got back to my apartment. The minute I got in I pulled my phone off my desk and saw I missed ten calls and eight text messages. He wasn’t happy, so I called him.
“Where the fuck have you been?” he roared on the other end. I wasn’t even offended or mad. I was mad when it took him twenty minutes to return a text. Tim has been contacting me all day; he was probably scared out of his mind.
“Calm down. Seriously, I forgot my phone on my desk this morning. My first class is at seven and I was rushing out. I didn’t realize it until I got there, and I didn’t have a break to call.”
“I’m sorry, babe. I shouldn’t have snapped. I was just fucking scared.” I could hear the contrition in his voice, but he didn’t need to explain.
“Tim, it’s okay,” I said, trying to calm him down from the edge.
“No, it’s not. I shouldn’t have freaked out and yelled.” He really sounded upset by his attitude.
“Well, let’s agree to disagree.”
“So then, how was your first day of classes, baby?” Every time he called me baby, I melted. It was like his voice wrapped around me, holding me close.
“They were okay. You know we go over the whole syllabus and meet and greet in every class. My teacher for the first class seems really nice.”
“Oh, yeah? That’s good, Vanessa. I wouldn’t like to have to go kick some ass if someone was mean to you.”
“Thanks, but I’m sure I can manage.”
“Just say the word and I’ll sneak away.” Oh how I’d love for him to come and see me. Just to have his arms around me, comforting me.
“I wish you could come here,” I said wistfully.
“Yeah, but you know if I did you’d be coming back with me,” he threatened.
“I know. I know. So are you really busy?”
“Today, I wasn’t, but yesterday I had several staff meetings. That’s why it took me long to respond. I was starting to think you were mad at me,” he said apologetically.
“I was a little upset at first, but I tried to let it go.”
“So, are we good now?”
“Yes. So what do you want to talk about?”
“How beautiful you are.”
“Stop playing. Tell me a little more about your family. I know you said you lost your parents years ago, but you do have some family somewhere, don’t you?”
“Yes, I’ve got a couple of cousins and two aunts and uncles, but grandma is the only one I actually talk to regularly. She’s a sweetheart, but not doing so good anymore. I hate that I don’t get to see her often, but that’s the way she likes it. She says that once a year is all that she wants. I’m actually due to go see her right before you go on spring break. That’s about it. I don’t see the others. They do their own thing.” There was more to that story, but I knew he didn’t want to talk about it at the moment. I’d find out about it sooner or later.
“Wow, that’s all your family. I think I have like twelve cousins and aunts and uncles galore.”
“Yes, it’ll make my guest list to the wedding very small.”
I didn’t know what to say after that. Thinking that far ahead scared me. I didn’t want to get my hopes up and his determination would withstand the test of time. We had to go several months of separation before we could be together. I hoped my will power lasted that long.
8
Tim
Being away from her for so long was eating away at me. I was so tempted to just up and run to her school on my way to my grandma’s. I had the next week off, then I’d be back in time to see Vanessa at her parent’s house. The flight to Pennsylvania had been a long one because I was so anxious to see my grandma. We talked last week and she tried to hide that she wasn’t feeling well. At ninety, she was getting up there in age and it was taking its toll.
My uncle, her oldest picked me up from the airport even though I told him I could rent a car. “Hello Nicholas. How have you been?” He didn’t like for me to call him uncle.
“I’m well, Timothy. It seems you’re doing well. You’re finally not in a uniform. What is it that you do now?” He said it like being in the military was a terrible thing. We protected his right to be a fucking snob and his family’s existence. What a prick.
“I’m the head of security for a family wealthier than ours.”
“You mean mine,” he said with that condescending air that he always had. I hated the fucker and all of the others. My mother married beneath her and everyone didn’t approve of a lowly carpenter marrying into a classy family. When my parents died during a trip in the Bahamas, my mother’s family blamed my father. I was cast off to live with my grandmother, who treated me like a king and raised me to love and respect everyone. She never hated my father because, unlike the rest of the family, money wasn’t everything to her. Love ruled all. Unfortunately, my grandfather was like the rest of the snobby family, but his death over two decades ago gave my grandmother some peace. He believed that I should be sent to a boarding school, and I was until his death. Apparently all of the kids had gone away to school making them cold and heartless. The only two who craved love were my mother, the youngest, and my grandmother, who hated that she was forced into the marriage.
“Yeah, whatever. Why the fuck did you bother picking me up if you were going to be a total prick? I don’t need your shit because you were never man enough to not live off your father’s hard work.”
“You sound like the trailer trash that you are.”
“Stop the fucking car right now because I’d rather walk the two miles in this weather than be stuck in the car with an arrogant snob who has a death wish.”
“I am not stopping and you will do as you’re told.”
“How old do you think I am? I’m man not some little shit you can push around.”
“If you want to see my mother, you’ll stay in the vehicle. I don’t want to take you anywhere but back to the airport, but it was mother’s request. If you go walking, she’ll be upset with both of us.”
Changing the subject before I killed this fucker, I asked, “How sick is she?”
“As expected for someone her age. It won’t be long now.” He sounded cheerful and full of anticipation.
“Wow, what the fuck? You sound like you’re looking forward to it. What? Is all your inheritance already spent?”
“Please. You have no idea what you’re talking about. There isn’t anything I need from my mother but her time. Something she wants to share with you.”
“Sucks to be you, doesn’t it? Uncle Nick, you know if you pulled that stick out of your ass, you could actually sit back and drive.”
“When she’s gone, I hope never to see you again.”
“First, that’s a dick thing to say about your mother, but since you’re a dick it’s no big deal for you. Just so you know, I could have visited grandma without looking at your ugly, pompous ass face.”
Thankfully we pulled up to the estate before it came to blows. I got out of the car and grabbed my bag before he could even say something shitty to me. His barbs over the years never bothered me when they were toward me. There was something about Nicholas Ellison II that struck me as odd over the years. All the other family members were tight with him, but with me he always gave me some shit. It all started when I was a kid and I said how he looked like grandma, but not grandpa. It always caused me to wonder if there was more to that, but I left it alone because I saw grandma’s sad expression. Whatever was the story behind the origins of that piece of shit wasn’t meant for public consumption.
The instant I got into the house, my cousins just walked right passed me.
“Grandma wants to see you in her rooms,” Sheila, one of the prick’s girls, said. She was another asshole. What was wrong with all of them. They acted like I was the kid from the wrong side of town instead of their cousin with parents who lived better than average lives. We weren’t poor when I was little, so I couldn’t understand why they hated me so much. It didn’t matter, though. I was looking forward to going home to see my woman in a few days.
I carried my luggage with me because I didn’t trust a soul in this place, except for the woman I came to see. She was the only reason I’d ever step back into his cold place.
As I knocked on the door, I smiled at the beautiful old woman in the bed. “If it’s not my handsome grandson. Come here already boy, I’m not getting any younger,” she teased. She looked sick but her spirit seemed high.
“I’ve missed you, Grandma,” I said, hugging her as tightly as I could without hurting her before pulling back to stand in front of her.
“Come sit with me here, and please tell me about the girl of your dreams,” she said, tapping the side of her bed. If I’d known that she was sick enough to be bedridden, I would have come sooner.
“You wanted me to come all this way to talk about Vanessa?” I asked, laughingly. The moment I told her I had someone special she told me that I’d better get my ass to her estate to discuss it.
“Ugh, Vanessa, what a terrible name to have,” she muttered, sticking her finger in mouth, gagging on the name.
‘Yes, just like Anderson’s wife.”
“Yes and she’s a real shrew, a total cunt.” I tried to keep from cracking up, but the woman had no filter. She wasn’t going to be held back from saying what she pleased.
“Well, Vanessa’s nothing like that. She’s a sweetheart. Beautiful, kind, and a little too young.”
“Robbing the cradle?” Her large grey eyes opened wider in a mock horror.
I laughed her off because that was all you could do with this damn character. “Just about. She’ll be nineteen, next week. The thing is we haven’t told anyone about us.”
“Why would you do that? I want to meet her now. Is something wrong with her?” Uh oh, her hackles rose.
“No, calm yourself, Grandma. Nothing’s wrong. Her brother just happens to be my close friend and boss.”
“Oh, Tim, please don’t let them make you feel less than worthy of her because you’re not. I won’t insult your woman by saying that she’s not good enough, but she’s got herself the best possible catch.”
“Thanks, Grandma. I love her very much. I feel like the lucky one.”
“That’s good, my boy.”
“So when is the big secret going to come out?”
“Next week during her spring break. We just met when she was on her Christmas vacation.”
“Love at first sight.”
“Yes, it was. She has me by the balls Grandma. I’d do anything to keep her.”
“As you should. Love only comes around once for most of us and sometimes it’s at the wrong time.” I had a feeling there was more in her words.
“There’s something I must tell you, but I want you to know that it changes nothing.” She took her time to speak. I thought it was because she was unwell, but it was because she had something to reveal—something massive.
“The thing is. I fell in love once. He was amazing, smart, hardworking, and kind. There was just one big hiccup. We were both married with children. Marriages set up by our parents. Divorce was something your grandfather would never accept, even when I became pregnant with your mother.”
“Grandma, what are you saying?” I wasn’t sure if I was understanding her correctly because it was too incredible to believe.
“That out of my children, your mother was the only one conceived in love, and I believe she was the only one with a heart for a reason. She didn’t have old cold, Ellison gene in her.”
I sat there taking in what my sweet old Grandma just admitted. My mother had been a love child from another man. I knew that my grandparent’s marriage was a terrible one from the start, and when I came to live here my grandmother told me that I was special over all the others when it came to her love. Now I understood why. My mother was the child she wanted to have, not forced to. It also explained away the look of sadness I had seen on my grandma’s face when I said Nick didn’t look like grandpa. It was because they were hiding a big secret. My grandfather wasn’t my mom’s dad. Insane. I felt like that was too much to cope with.
“I hope this doesn’t change your feelings for me.” Her eyes begged for forgiveness, but she didn’t owe me one. Her life had been complicated and mostly forced.
“No, not at all. I love you, Grandma. It just explains why everyone else doesn’t care for me.”
“Yes, well there are tons of secrets in this family. But you were the best kept. I love you, my sweet Timothy, and I love your mother for giving you that name. It was her father’s.”
“She knew the truth?”
“Yes, Evan didn’t let her ever forget it. He had several other children with several of my staff, but I couldn’t care less about it because we were only married in name by the time I met Timothy.”
“He actually filed for divorce when he learned about your mother, and we were about to runaway together when he was killed in a car accident.” I heard the suspicion in her voice. It was more than likely not an accident.
“I’m sorry that you lost the love of your life, Grandma. I could never imagine losing Vanessa.”
“Then don’t ever let her go.” I could hear the weakness in her voice. She was getting tired.
“Grandma, I’m going to let you rest. Let me know if you need anything.”
“Thank you, sweet boy. I’m so glad you gave up going to war, but you know your true grandfather had served his country proudly during in WWII. You remind me of him so much.
”
“Goodnight,” I whispered, bending down to give her a kiss on her forehead.
I walked to the room that had been mine since I was a little boy. Putting my suitcase down, I walked to the bed and sat on the edge, thinking about her revelation. As I sat there, I understood that times were so different then. Life wasn’t full of the choices today as they had been before. My grandmother suffered at my grandfather’s hands. I knew that was why my mother loved someone so out of her realm. She wanted what was real. Just like I want with Vanessa.
Needing to hear her voice, I gave her a call and told her everything that happened since I landed. “Oh, Tim. I’m sorry. I know that wasn’t what you expected coming here, but it’s for the best. Didn’t you say you couldn’t stand the others and it’s for a reason. I’m glad there’ll be none of that asshole blood in our kids’ genes either.”
“Thanks, baby. You’ve made me hard as fuck without even trying. Just the thought of knocking you up with my babies gets me stiff. Damn, I might have to change my plans after I see you next week. I wonder if there’s a house for rent somewhere in Urbana.”
“Are you saying you want to come and stay there?”
“No baby. My home is in Seattle, and I love it there, but it will be our place until you finish the semester.”
“I like that idea much better than waiting until the end of the year, but what about your job?”
“Let me worry about that.” I never told her that I had money saved up and invested while I was in the service. Since they had hated me, I wasn’t included in the Ellison wealth, but it hadn’t put a damper on my situation. I had more than enough to start the security firm I wanted to establish. There were plenty of potential clients that I already had shopped. It was only a matter of time until I had all my ducks in a row. I had some of my battle scarred buddies who already had their own firm out in Boston and were working in Seattle for the time being. They gave me plenty of inside information and potential employees for when I was ready to get the ball rolling.