Second Chances Boxed Set: 7 Sweet & Sexy Romances in 1 Book

by Tracey Alvarez

  “Yes. He’s a great kid.” He looked at Lucia, suddenly realizing what lay behind the quiet question. He slipped his arm around her shoulders. “Guy said you’re still waiting on the results of the latest IVF. It’ll happen.”

  He felt her sigh and shake her head against his shoulder. “I don’t know if I can take much more. Each time, I’m so hopeful, so full of expectation that… it’s just so much harder when it comes to nothing.”

  “Don’t give up.”

  “That’s all right for you to say, James. You’ll marry when you find the right girl and have a tonne of children.”

  “No. That won’t happen. Anyway, this is you we’re talking about. You and Guy and it will happen, I know it.”

  Lucia laughed and pulled away. “Even though I know you’re talking me up, I feel better. You can always do that, James. It’s your gift to the world.”

  “Sure.” He turned back to the window to watch Susie walk away from the group, into the house.

  “Why don’t you go and find Susie. I think she’s a bit embarrassed by my faux pas. I’m really sorry.”

  “Doesn’t worry me. But then your mistake is completely understandable.”

  Lucia looked up into his face and kept her hand on his arm, detaining him. “Is Callum right? Is this for real?”

  James felt the tension of emotion ball up inside him, making him unable to speak for a few moments. He cleared his throat and still found he couldn’t speak. He pressed his lips together in a rueful expression and nodded and looked away.

  She smiled. “Tread carefully, then. Susie doesn’t look the sort of woman to forgive things lightly.”

  “You’re right there. But, then, she’s had it rough.”

  “Go find her.”

  He walked past the room that they were both to have shared and hesitated by the spare room. He knocked on the door. Susie answered it straight away, as if she’d been waiting on the other side. She still hadn’t changed for dinner, but had obviously been standing by the open windows that looked out to the rolling hills planted with grapevines. Her low-heeled pumps had been kicked off and her bag sat, still packed, on the bed.

  She looked lost and, unusually for her, anxious. James fisted his fingers in restraint. He desperately wanted to take her in his arms and hold her, to make everything all right. More than that, he wanted to take those damned corporate clothes off her. Best of all he’d have preferred to see her naked. Second best, at least in clothes that she felt comfortable in—shorts, t-shirt, casual clothes that suited her outdoors, practical nature.

  “You okay?”

  She nodded, too quickly. “Sure.”

  “Lucia’s mortified she had the wrong idea.”

  Susie shrugged. “It’s not her fault.”

  “You mean it’s mine.”

  She sighed. “Look, James, I’m sure you didn’t tell her we were a couple but I’m equally sure she’s not used to providing separate rooms for you and your… friends.”

  “True. Come on, get changed. Dinner will be soon.” He took hold of her hands and looked deep into her eyes. “What is it?”

  “It’s just weird, being with all your family again. I mean, my family were their employees and I still feel like one.”

  “You don’t feel like one to me. You never did.”

  “That’s because you’re, you.”

  “So I’m not so bad, then.”

  “I didn’t say that.”

  “What did you say?”

  “You’ve always been able to see me for who I am.”

  He nodded. “I know.”

  “How?”

  “Because it was the same for me. And you knowing that, Susie, is what made what happened all the more difficult for me to understand.”

  “What?”

  “You believing that I slept with you on a dare.”

  “Because you did.”

  “No, I didn’t. I was young, I’d drunk too much and the guys were having me on. All it did was to make me look at you in a different way. All it did was make me go up to you and instead of sharing a joke, to take your hand and ask you to dance. All it did was to make me drop the screen that lay between you and me and make me see you for what you really were.”

  He still hadn’t looked her straight in the eyes. Instead he watched her throat constrict as she swallowed hard.

  “A girl, you mean?”

  “More than that. A girl who was beautiful, a girl who somehow, completed me.” He nodded and stepped away.

  “Completed you? What does that mean?”

  “I don’t know. It’s what I felt. Correction, it’s what I still feel.” He walked backwards away from her before he pushed his luck too far. He wanted to go on, wanted to tell her what was still in his heart but was scared it would drive her away.

  “If you felt like that, why didn’t you come to see me?”

  “Susie! I did, you know I did. You refused to see me!”

  “That was after I’d had the abortion, after I’d discovered you already had a girlfriend, after Dad had died and your mother had tossed me, my mother and my brother out of the shepherd’s cottage that went with his job and off the estate. After my life was in tatters.”

  “And you blamed me.”

  “Of course I did.”

  “Do you still?”

  “Partly. But I blame myself more. I should never have listened to my parents or to you. And…”

  He lifted her chin gently with his finger. “And?”

  “I should never have believed your friends, over you.”

  “It’s past. We can only move on from here.”

  “But how?”

  “Step by step. Slowly. I don’t want to make the same mistakes again.” He moved forward and kissed her forehead. “Come on, let’s go.” He grinned. “Otherwise all those protestations I’ve been making about our relationship being platonic won’t be believed.”

  She sighed and shook her head. “I’ll get changed.”

  “Don’t worry about what to wear. Just wear your usual…” He indicated her clothes with his hand as if unable to express it.

  “Usual chain-store rubbish?”

  “I didn’t say, ‘rubbish’. No.” He shrugged. “I mean… whatever you wear you look beautiful in.”

  She shook her head but smiled. “James,” she said reproachfully.

  “What?” he asked, indignation playing on his features. “I mean it.”

  “I know you do.” She walked up to him and kissed him quickly and softly on the lips. “I know you do,” she repeated more softly. “And that’s what makes you so very special.”

  Susie walked towards her suitcase and James backed out of the door, confused, swept away by the soft kiss and her words. He closed it behind him and leaned back against it, unable to move towards the light and laughter that spilled out from the open door at the end of the hallway. He felt as if he’d been given an electric shock. His heart pounded and he felt more alive than he had for years. He’d wanted absolution and he doubted he’d ever get that. But Susie had just given him something far more valuable. She’d shown him a future that wasn’t bleak, a future that held a light of hope. And he wanted that light. He wanted her.

  Chapter Eight

  James sat back and watched his friends and family relax. The conversation flowed and the teasing and laughter was easy, showing the rapport the group had together, a result of years of friendship. Usually James was the center of attention, always a part of the action, but not tonight. Tonight, he sat back and watched his family and friends talk. Tonight, his mind and heart were full of the woman whose absence he felt more acutely now than he had over the last ten years. Crazy, he thought to himself.

  He shifted his gaze away from the group to the swimming pool upon whose darkness pinpricks of light reflected from the outside lights. He focused on the bright shimmering spots, his eyes prickling with their brilliance. Crazy, he repeated, to think seeing her again, helping her out financially, would make things easier for t
hem both. It had made things a whole lot more complicated. He’d planned a future based on the assumption that there would be no love, no family for him. But now the world had shifted from under his feet and he’d have to return to the States and cancel those plans. It wouldn’t be a problem because his personal life and his business life had slowly merged into one until they’d become indistinguishable. And business could always be canceled.

  “You’re quiet.”

  He turned to find Cassandra had removed herself and had sat down beside him. She was one person from whom he couldn’t hide his thoughts. “Yeah.” He smiled. “Happens once every decade or so.”

  She raised an eyebrow. “Laugh it off all you want, but you can’t fool me.”

  “Cassandra, I didn’t think anyone could fool you, not for one moment, especially not my big brother. He’s far too direct and honest to fool anyone.”

  “And so are you, behind the charm.”

  He felt his façade slip away, along with his smile. He sighed and pushed his fingers through his hair. “What the hell am I going to do?”

  She sat back and took a sip of her wine, apparently unsurprised by the question. “Tell me about her.”

  “How did you know it was about Susie? And not some other woman, some other deal, some other—”

  “Just a random guess.” She grinned.

  He paused, trying desperately to make sense of the myriad thoughts and feelings that ran chaotically through his mind and body—surging, retreating, swamping him with confusion. “I’ve known so many women, I’ve lived life all over the world, doing what I wanted, where I wanted, with whom I wanted. Non-stop excitement. But…”

  “It’s not enough?”

  He shook his head. “No.” He could hardly say the word but he could feel it, like a bitter pill stuck to his lips that he was trying not to swallow. “No,” he repeated even more softly, shaking his head.

  “Then stop that life and start a new one. Sometimes it takes a bit of time to work out what you want.”

  “Ah, but you see, I think I’ve always known what I wanted. Trouble is I messed up, I’m not good enough for her.”

  “Come on, that’s not true. Give yourself more credit than that.”

  He shook his head. “You don’t know what I did.”

  “Whatever it was, it couldn’t have been that bad. I’m sure she must have forgiven you by now.”

  “I don’t think…” The words died on his lips as he turned to follow the gaze of the others. Susie stood there, looking hesitant and… sensational.

  “Go to her, James, and make it work. You deserve it.”

  Did he? He couldn’t agree but he had no choice but to rise and walk over to her. He was drawn to her at some instinctive level that he couldn’t understand. And he didn’t want or need to understand. He held out his hand to her and she took it. He curled his fingers around hers and gripped them like he was never going to let it go.

  As soon as James took her hand, Susie forgot about being self-conscious in the dress that clung to her every curve. She’d packed the dress on a last-minute whim. She’d worn it only once before, not liking the way men had stared at her in it. She hadn’t analyzed her impulse to wear it again, but now, seeing the way James was looking at her, she knew that that was why she’d brought it. Deep down, she wanted James to stare at her in the same way. But she hadn’t anticipated the others being here and she felt self-conscious. But the secure warmth of James’s hand wrapped around hers, made her nerves disappear.

  He drew her hand to his lips and kissed it. “You look beautiful,” he murmured. And, for once, she felt it.

  “Hey, Susie!” Gemma called. “Come and sit over here.”

  As they walked hand in hand over to the others, a part of Susie—the no nonsense, cool-headed woman who didn’t like to reveal her emotions in public—thought she should release his hand, but she couldn’t. He had a hold on her in more ways than just his hand. For some reason he was able to find the chinks in her armor and connect with emotions she didn’t even know she still had. She had a frightening feeling that there was no going back, no covering up the girl who was revealed simply by James’s presence. Under the soft lights of the terrace, their relationship had just moved to a deeper level. She didn’t know where it would lead, she only knew she’d need all her strength if she was going to stop it from taking over her life.

  She drew in a deep breath and tore her gaze from James whose soft smile and hungry eyes were both admiring and devouring at the same time. She forced herself to look at Gemma who glanced between them with a smile.

  “Tell us about yourself,” Gemma said. “We don’t often get to meet up with James’s friends.”

  “The interrogation has begun,” James said. “Sorry, Susie. There’s no getting away from it. I’ll get you a drink.”

  As James walked away, Susie sat down beside Gemma and Lucia, trying hard to work out how she could recount a past that didn’t show the Mackenzies in a bad light. “Nothing much to tell. I live a quiet life on Waiheke Island. My son visits at weekends and I work hard at the winery pretty much 24/7. The owner wanted out of the business and so James has bought it. He’s interested in building up The Lodge business. Hence our visit here.”

  “Great idea,” Lucia said. “Guy says it’s remarkably successful and if anyone has enough contacts with people to make a lodge work on Waiheke, it’ll be James.” Lucia hesitated and then leaned towards Susie. “Tell me, how did you go from rural Mackenzie country into growing wine on Waiheke?”

  Susie looked uncomfortably at James who passed her a large glass of wine. “The long way round. Hard work, long hours and sacrifices.”

  “Sounds so unlike you, James.” Dallas laughed.

  “Hey, wait a minute. I work smart.”

  “And are you saying I don’t?” Susie asked.

  “No, of course I’m not.” James’s voice changed when he addressed her. “You’ve done what you have to do.” He turned to the others. “Susie’s worked her way from nothing to where she is today. A solo mum with a kid, it must have been hard.”

  Susie pressed her trembling lips together tightly as she listened to James proudly list her achievements.

  “Very impressive, Susie,” Dallas said, leaning back, watching her consideringly. “That takes a lot of dedication.”

  She shrugged. “I had no choice. I had to look after myself and my son. And luckily I shared the same vision for the winery as its previous owner.”

  “And now you’ve got James. What vision for the winery do you have, James?”

  “Susie and I are in agreement,” James said quietly, looking at her. “Invest in some new machinery, create a high-end lodge, but otherwise, keep the wine as it is. It’s excellent. There’s no need to change it.”

  “Did you consider amalgamating with a larger winery, say one of the Marlborough vineyards, import their grapes, increase variety and quantity. It could push Whisper Creek into a different league.”

  “We considered it.” James glanced at Susie. “But Susie prefers to be independent and, in this case, I think it works.”

  “Right.” Dallas looked from Susie back to James and back to Susie again. “There’s a lot to be said for independence.”

  “It’s the way it has to be.” Susie looked at James. It was a message for him and only him. No matter how he looked at her, no matter how he made her feel, she had to look after herself, she couldn’t let him threaten her hard-won independence. Not when he could destroy it again, on a whim. “It’s the way it has to be, James.”

  He turned away abruptly.

  “So…” said Cassandra, obviously picking up on the change in atmosphere. “If you’re not staying on at Waiheke, James, where to next?”

  “We’re both back to Auckland tomorrow. Susie’s off to Waiheke and I’m leaving for the States. I have”—James’s gaze faltered slightly—“I had things planned that I need to change. Then, well, we’ll see.” His gaze didn’t shift from Susie’s, but she tried to
avoid it, focusing on sipping her wine. “You know me,” he continued, “never still for long.”

  “Certainly never home for long,” Dallas said.

  “Apart from that time, James, when you came back to Glencoe,” said Callum. “I never did understand what that was all about.”

  James shifted his glance and frowned at Callum. “I needed some time out after my first year at university.”

  “It lasted a whole year! A year in which you did nothing but hang around, getting in everyone’s way.”

  Susie looked quizzically at Callum. “That doesn’t sound like James.”

  “Well.” Callum looked at James. “Crap happens sometimes that gets to you. Even if you’re James.”

  “Were you depressed?” Susie asked directly.

  James didn’t meet anyone’s gaze just raised his eyebrows in surprise, as he swirled the wine around his glass. Slowly he lifted his glass until it was level with her face and subtly shifted his gaze from the glass to her eyes. She was shocked by its dark intensity. “Who me? How likely is that?” His words were designed for humor but his glance, that only Susie could see, wasn’t. The others laughed. Susie didn’t. And nor did Callum.

  “Pretty likely after what Dad did to you,” Callum said.

  Dallas ground his teeth and looked away. “I should have been there.”

  “You couldn’t be everywhere,” Callum said. “Besides, I sorted it. James and I sorted it.”

  “What happened?” asked Susie.

  “Just Dad being a bastard as usual. He liked to use his sons as punching bags. James had avoided most of it because mother sent him away to school. But when he returned he copped it worse than either of us. He wasn’t used to it, like I was,” Callum added. “Didn’t know the signs.”

  “You should have told him,” Dallas said angrily.

  “I tried. I told him to leave but he wouldn’t and I wasn’t always around to stop it. God knows what James was hanging around for—he just kept saying he was waiting for someone.”