Finding Faith [Red Hook, Texas 2] (Siren Publishing Classic)

by Lee Rose

  She nodded. “I’m just happy she is okay. I was so terrified when I woke up here. I felt so sick when I got home from work. I threw myself on the couch and fell asleep. I must have been heavily asleep. I don’t remember you pulling me out or the ambulance ride here.”

  “You should have called me, Faith. I would have come over and helped you.”

  “We argued, Adam. We said no more contact until the birth of our baby,” she reminded him.

  His eyes filled with grief. “I’m sorry for what I put you through, Faith. You didn’t deserve it. I realize now that I do love you, Faith. I have for a long time. I was just being a coward because I was afraid of losing someone I love again.”

  She put her hand up to stop him. She didn’t want to believe in him only to have the rug pulled from under her when he calmed down. “No, Adam. It’s just the panic talking from the scare you had yesterday. You said you were scared when you saw the fire. Once you calm down, you will realize it was the fear talking. You’ll regret all this emotional talk. You hate this kind of stuff, remember? You will change your mind and remind me no one can take the place of Josie.”

  He shook his head in denial. He gave her a sincere look. “I realized my feelings before the fire. I was calling you when the alarm went off and we headed to your house.”

  He looked sincere but she had a hard time believing he could do such an about-face in such a short time. She couldn’t handle any more stress. She had to put the baby first. Adam was too much work. The doctor told her that her blood pressure was high. She needed to quit stressing over everything and rest. Easier said than done but she had to try.

  “You don’t believe me,” he stated dejectedly. His shoulders slumped down but she refused to feel any sympathy. He had hurt her one too many times. He sighed loudly and changed the subject.

  “When can you leave the hospital? Do you have a place to stay?”

  “Red Cross is paying for a hotel for three days,” Faith told him. “I have to look for another house to rent or maybe I should just buy. The baby needs a stable home.”

  “You and Holly can stay at my house. Noah’s old room is empty,” he suggested.

  Faith would never be able to live in the same house as him and not have him. It would be too painful. “I don’t think that is a good idea, Adam. We’ll fight in twenty-four hours and say hurtful things to each other. We agreed to stay away from each other.”

  “I’ll behave. I promise.” He crossed his finger over his heart seriously but Faith snorted. “Yeah right.”

  She yawned.

  “I’m not going to give up on us, Faith,” he said softly and she could see the determination in his eyes. It confused her. He had been so insistent he couldn’t love another woman. Was it just the fire making him say these things? She had to resist him or she would only get hurt in a week or so when the intense scare he had faded away. He would be back to loving Josie.

  “I’m not Josie, Adam,” she said sadly. Her eyes grew watery and her vision became blurry. “You’re still in love with her, remember? I deserve a man who is going to love me. I have never been loved before and I refuse to settle for pity or duty. It would devastate me.”

  Adam looked at her with grief. “I knew it wouldn’t be easy to convince you of my feelings. I’ve done a good job of having my head up my ass. If you give me another chance, I will spend the rest of my life making sure you are happy.”

  “You’ll get over it in a few days and you’ll be back clinging to your old memory,” she insisted.

  She yawned again. “It’s too late for us, Adam, but I would like you to be there for our child. I always felt responsible for my dad leaving us. Raising children is hard work and I thought maybe we were too much trouble for him. I don’t want our daughter feeling that way.”

  “I don’t either, and I will be there for her and you. I am not giving up,” he said firmly again. “I see how tired you are but I will see you later.”

  Faith barely nodded at him before her eyes closed and she fell into a much needed sleep. Sleep was easier, so she let herself go.

  * * * *

  Faith sat on her couch in her office. They had stayed at a hotel for three days and she did nothing but rest. She made Jenny the manager and gave her a raise. It had been good to have a lot of time to just relax. Now she felt more energized. Her doctor said her blood pressure was lower and he was happy about that.

  Holly was staying with a friend from school while Faith tried to find another house. They checked out of the hotel that morning and she planned on spending the night on the couch in her office. Tomorrow she had a couple of places to look at.

  Alana had tried to convince her to stay with her, but Alana was still a newlywed and she felt funny intruding. The shop was cold and she had a thick sweater on. Thankfully most of their clothes just needed a few washings and were okay. The furniture had been a total loss.

  She looked at the clock. She was supposed to meet Alana for dinner. She didn’t feel hungry, but she knew she had to eat.

  She looked down at her black stretchy pants she had bought the other day. She was finally gaining weight and her jeans no longer fit. Her light gray sweater was baggy and loose. She brushed her hair and headed out to her car. She drove the mile to the Garcia place. She hoped she didn’t see Adam there. After his visit at the hospital, she hadn’t seen him again.

  Christmas was the day after tomorrow and she felt depressed. She always did during the holidays but she tried to pretend cheerfulness for Holly’s sake. She just looked around and saw people talking about all their plans with family and friends. She was grateful she had Holly but it got rather lonely still. The thought that next year she would have a baby to spoil was the only thing that cheered her up.

  She was still confused about Adam’s speech at the hospital. She ignored all his phone calls. She felt vulnerable and wanted to wait until she felt strong enough to deal with him. She thought about asking Alana for her advice. She knew Adam better than Faith did.

  She parked her car and went inside. Mrs. Garcia waved her over to the bar. “Alana is running late, but have a seat. Can I get you some juice?”

  Faith slipped onto the barstool, leaving her coat on. Christmas music played in the background. “Yes please. That tea you gave me worked wonders. Even my doctor was impressed with my weight gain.”

  Lucy Garcia sent her a pleased smile. “I knew it would. It is a home remedy, but it worked with all three of my babies.”

  They made small talk when Faith noticed a girl sitting a few seats down with another woman. Faith groaned silently. Nina Sanchez hated Faith. They went to school together and Nina had always bullied Faith and Holly because they were poor. Faith had kicked her out of her coffee shop when Nina tried to get an attitude with her.

  Nina turned and spotted Faith. Her smile turned cruel. She had on a fancy black dress and heels.

  “Heard you were homeless, Faith.” She sneered loudly so others could hear her. Faith’s cheeks turned red, but she did her best to ignore Nina and not cry. Damn hormones. She wanted to feel anger, not cry like a baby. All she did these days was cry.

  Nina’s dinner companion laughed. “Having a bad year, Faith? Pregnant, alone, and homeless.”

  Faith tried to think of a witty comeback, but her mind was blank, and if a hole opened up on the floor she would gladly jump in.

  Chapter 13

  Adam swallowed down his nervousness. Alana was playing matchmaker again. She invited Faith to meet her for dinner but insisted Adam tag along. Noah was working the night shift and convinced Adam to go with Alana and keep the girls company.

  What if Faith walked out? She hadn’t answered any of his calls since he confessed his feelings in the hospital. Now he knew what it felt like when she called him every day and he blew her off. It only made him feel worse knowing he had hurt her so deeply. He was at a loss on how to convince her that he meant what he said. He loved her, but she had warned him it would be too late by the time he came to his senses
.

  He spotted her from outside as he parked the car. He saw her red hair right away. It was growing past her shoulders and he liked it. He couldn’t help but admit he was excited to see her. He walked in the door with Alana. He spotted a girl he hooked up with last spring and now he avoided her like the plague. Nina Sanchez. Not only was she clingy, but she was conceited and mean. He heard her callous remarks to Faith and it made his blood boil.

  “We should have brought Alicia. She hates Nina and Patty,” Alana muttered with murder in her eyes. She stalked over to Faith and kissed her cheek in a greeting. Faith gave her a shaky smile and she looked so sad. Adam’s heart shattered and he wanted to hold her and protect her from the world.

  “At least Faith owns her own business, Nina. You mooch off your daddy’s money,” Adam said just as loud. People gasped and turned toward them, but he was too mad to stop. “All you’re good at is shopping and picking up men.”

  Nina gasped and tried to smile innocently. “Darling. I didn’t see you come in. Faith and I go way back. I didn’t say it to be rude. I heard her house caught on fire and she was living in a hotel room.”

  “I feel sorry for her. Someone guy knocked her up and walked away,” Patty remarked, flipping her blonde hair over her shoulder. She gave Faith a pitiful look. “She should dress better if she wants to keep a man.”

  “You and your friend have no idea what it means to feel compassion.” Alana stood in front of Faith, blocking them from seeing her. Adam was grateful. He could see her hands shaking when she sipped on her juice. He was instantly worried. She looked pale and on the edge of a breakdown.

  “And for your information Nina I am the father of her baby,” he said in a cold, hard voice.

  Nina gasped with shock. Then she looked at him furiously. She hated to hear that. She still pursued him constantly and he always turned her down.

  “I did not walk away from her. I don’t know who starts these stupid rumors, but they’re not true and I better not hear you two spreading them,” Adam warned, glaring at the two girls coldly.

  “You must leave,” Mrs. Garcia told the women. “Faith is like family. I do not tolerate such cruelty.”

  Nina stuck her nose up in the air. “Morehead has much classier places than this rundown town.”

  “Maybe you should move there,” Alana suggested cheerfully. The two girls stomped off angrily.

  “Thanks,” Faith said in a low voice. She avoided looking at him.

  “They always bullied me and Holly because we were poor and my mom drank all the time.”

  “They better not show their faces here again,” Alana vowed, folding her arms across her chest in an angry manner. “I’ll get Alicia to go after them. She hates those two. They always come in here like they are royalty. I regret stopping her from telling them off now.”

  Adam laughed. Alicia had quite a mouth on her. She was good with snappy comebacks and had been a thorn in Noah’s side until he made up with Alana.

  “Are you okay, Faith?” Adam asked. He was getting more concerned about how pale she looked. He was no medical expert but he knew it could not be good.

  She was grabbing her stomach. She turned her gaze away from him and it hurt that she couldn’t even look at him. Did she hate him that much? “I feel sick, like I want to throw up. I think I should cancel dinner, Alana.”

  Alana looked worried. She touched Faith’s forehead. “You feel hot.”

  “I had a long day at work. I was so busy and Jenny was off today,” she explained, her voice sounding weak and shaky.

  Adam grabbed her arm and helped her off the stool. He waited to see if she was steady on her feet before letting go of her arm. He wanted to hold her but he doubted Faith would go for that right now. “Are you at the hotel still?”

  She shook her head. “We checked out this morning. I thought I’d spend the night at the shop. Tomorrow I have some places to look at.”

  “That’s it, Faith. You are going home with me. You shouldn’t be alone. I will not hear any more nonsense from you,” he said firmly, not giving her a choice. He was going to take care of her whether she liked it or not.

  “I will get some homemade chicken soup,” Mrs. Garcia offered. She went to the kitchen.

  Faith looked at Alana. “Thanks for the dinner invite. I’m sorry it didn’t go well.”

  “We’ll do it again. Maybe after Christmas,” Alana said with sympathy.

  Faith nodded and Mrs. Garcia came back with two large Styrofoam cups of soup. She handed them to Adam.

  “Let me help.” Alana took the soup. “You help Faith into that monster truck of yours.”

  Adam grinned. “It’s only a huge truck to short shrimps like you.”

  Alana chuckled and followed him out. He helped Faith in and carefully set the soup down.

  She was so quiet on the drive to his house, which was not like her. It really worried him. It was hard to read her these days. She was no longer open and friendly with him and although he knew it was his own fault he missed the smiles.

  He helped her inside the house and placed her on the couch. He started a fire and covered her with a blanket.

  “Thanks,” she said, putting it over her. He went into the kitchen and poured some soup in a bowl. He texted Liam to come and check her over. He was getting worried about her health. She needed him and he was going to be there for her. She could try to push him away, but he was not going to budge. He had avoided feeling anything for so many years. Now that he opened up his heart, it was like a flood had washed over him. He felt sorrow, regret, love, and hope. Hope that he hadn’t messed up so much that Faith would never forgive him. He loved her and he wished he could go back to that first date. He would do it right this time. He would shower her with attention.

  He went back into the living room and she was staring into the fire looking so lost and alone.

  How was he going to convince her he meant it when he said he loved her? He had already gone to the cemetery to say his final good-bye to Josie. He was ready to let go of the past and move forward with his life. He had to find a way to convince Faith. He got the feeling it was going to be a long road.

  Chapter 14

  Faith sat still while Adam’s brother listened to her breathing.

  “You have a fever, Faith, but your lungs are clear,” he pronounced, putting his equipment back in the bag. “Your blood pressure is up, but after what happened tonight that is understandable.”

  “The soup helped. Mostly I’m just tired,” she told him. “It’s been a rough week. Scratch that, it’s been a rough month.”

  Liam gave her a gentle look filled with kindness. He had just gotten home from work. “I know. Call your doctor in the morning and see what he says. In the meantime, all you need is a good night’s rest.”

  She nodded and he got up, leaving her alone with his brother. The silence was filled with awkwardness, and Faith wasn’t sure what to say to Adam. She felt awkward being in his house. The living room was cozy. A big-screen TV was the centerpiece of the room. The couch was a soft brown filled with many pillows.

  Faith looked at Adam, who was just sitting next to her, watching her quietly. “Thank you for rescuing me. You shouldn’t have told Nina you were the father. She loves to spread gossip. It’s going to be all over town by morning.”

  He moved a strand of hair and put it behind her ear. She felt her cheeks warm up, but hopefully he would put it down to the fever.

  “I don’t give a flip who Nina tells. I will not hide the fact that this baby is mine.”

  Faith tried to smile but it felt wobbly. She was so emotional these days and she didn’t like it. She wasn’t sure how to respond to his statement, so she stayed silent. At least he wanted the baby.

  “Let’s relax and watch a movie together,” he suggested, fixing the blanket over her. “You are staying here. Noah’s room is empty and it is silly to stay in your cold office. Tomorrow you call your doctor. Hopefully it is a simple cold that will run its course.”
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br />   “I didn’t want to make you the object of gossip if people find out I am staying here with you. This is a small town,” she explained. “We’re barely even friends. What will people say?”

  “Whatever they want. That means nothing to me.” He scooted closer until there was no space between them. He kissed the top of her head and pulled her close to him. It felt good to lean on him even for a moment. “It’s my fault we are not friends. I owe you so many apologies that I don’t know where to start. I want us to be friends.”

  “For the baby’s sake,” she said sadly, accepting that. “I guess we should.”

  “I know that is all you will accept for now.” He sounded tired. “I should have done everything differently, so I know the blame lies on my shoulders for the way we are. I fought my feelings for you, Faith, and I hurt you in the process. I was an ass.”

  “Yes you were,” she said simply. He was or he had been? At least he was trying to be nice to her now. She couldn’t wish for more. Well she could, but it would be pointless. She didn’t want to come second to a ghost.

  He chuckled and she felt his body vibrate with laughter. “God I love your bluntness, Faith. It is so refreshing.”

  If only he could love her. She sighed loudly. “I found a few houses to look at. I won’t be in your hair long, Adam.”

  “I will enjoy having you here. I want us to talk and get to know each other,” he insisted.

  She gave him a curious look. “Why? Won’t that mess up your game with your lady friends?”

  “I don’t have any lady friends. There has been no one but you in months,” he said honestly, and she could hear his sincerity. “I have been in love with you for a long time. Making love with you only cemented it, but I was too scared to admit it to myself or to you. I will always regret that and the way I acted when you told me the news about the baby. I ruined what should have been a happy memory.”

  He didn’t love her, he just had a scare. It would pass, she was sure of it. “At least you want the baby now. She is innocent in this mess we made. I want her to feel loved, Adam. I don’t want her to always look in the mirror trying to figure out why she is unlovable.”