Gavin had no idea what he was talking about. And another call kept beeping in while Brodie was speaking, so he thought he might have missed a key piece of information. “Terrific at what, exactly?”
“As a mom for Eli.”
Gavin pictured that purple balloon with Eli’s heartfelt letter, telling his parents how he would love them when he got his new mommy and daddy. Then he saw that same, adorable little boy hugging Haley and telling her...that he loved her.
“She will be terrific.” He knew in his heart that it was true. What an amazing mother Haley would be.
And an amazing wife, his heart whispered.
He shook his head, dismissing the thought before it had a chance to settle.
“I agree,” Brodie said. “So, have you heard anything about Buddy?”
“Not yet. I’ll keep you posted if I do.”
He disconnected then looked to see whose call he had missed. Haley Calhoun.
A text message from her came in while he was looking at the name on his display.
Tried to call but it went to voice mail. I wanted you to know the surgery went great. Marble is gone. Just waiting for Buddy to wake up now.
Leaning his head against the headrest, Gavin closed his eyes. “Thank You, God.” Then he quickly tapped out a reply. Be right there.
He turned on the car and started the short drive to the clinic acutely aware of two things. One, while Haley had relayed the information about Buddy’s surgery, she hadn’t asked Gavin to come. And two, he was going anyway. In fact, he couldn’t imagine anything that would keep him away.
* * *
Haley read Gavin’s reply. Obviously he cared as much about Buddy as she and Eli did. She glanced at the puppy currently in the incubator to keep him from becoming chilled, saw his eyes squint as he started to wake.
She smiled. Eli was going to be so happy. She prayed she could always make him happy, especially when she told him that she wanted to be the new mommy he’d talked about.
Mommy.
She couldn’t wait.
She’d called Brodie and Savvy as soon as the surgery ended. They’d wasted no time giving her the basics on the path to adoption. A course for fostering, since fostering Eli would be the first step. Then a social worker would meet with her, and with Eli, periodically as a court evaluated her for parenting.
But they hadn’t seen any reason to think the process wouldn’t go smoothly. And they’d suspected Eli might be her son by Christmas or Valentine’s Day at the latest.
Two amazing days to celebrate her dream of having a child.
She bit her lip, recalling the other part of her dream. But then she shook that away. God was giving her a chance to raise a precious little boy as her own, and she was beyond grateful.
“Hey.”
She jumped in her seat, turned toward the doorway, where Gavin leaned in, smiling. “I knocked and then called your name from the front. You must have something pretty intense on your mind.”
“I do,” she whispered, her skin growing warm at the mere sight of him. “Look.” She eased her chair back so he could have a full view of the patient, still twitching his eyes as he slowly woke. “No more marble.”
“How about that,” he said quietly. “Must have been a pretty incredible doctor working on him to take care of him like that.”
She smiled, the compliment settling in her chest and warming her completely. Amazing how Gavin Thomason affected her, even by merely speaking.
He’d be a great friend to have around when she was raising Eli. A father figure Eli could look up to. A guy that Haley would be around often all the while trying to remember that they were just friends.
She sighed. But could she really compartmentalize her feelings like that? Or was she just fooling herself?
Buddy’s eyes flickered again and she stood, motioning for Gavin to follow her out of the room so they could keep him in his quiet environment.
They reached the lobby and moved to the counter, Gavin leaning one hip against the side and Haley hopping up to sit on top, so that they were at eye level.
“So our little marble eater is going to be okay?” he asked.
“He’ll be a bit groggy for the next day or so, probably sleeping most of the time, and then he’ll have to endure a bland diet for a few days.”
“Nothing as flavorful as marbles?” he asked with a sly grin.
“Hardly.” She laughed, wishing she hadn’t noticed the slight indention when he smiled, a tiny dimple in his left cheek she hadn’t seen before. It added yet another degree of striking to the man.
“But he’ll be good as new after he recovers, right?”
“He will, though we’ll have to watch him pretty closely from now on.”
“Why is that?” His smile dropped. Dimple disappeared. “Will this cause a problem for him in the future?”
“Not necessarily,” she said, “but typically when a dog eats one obstruction, he’s going to eat another.”
And the dimple made a reappearance. “Ah, I get it. Repeat offenders?”
She laughed again, thoroughly enjoying how easy she found it to talk and laugh with Gavin Thomason. “Usually.”
“Then I’d say you’re right—we’ll have to watch this mischievous critter real closely from now on, won’t we?” he asked, placing a hand on her shoulder. “Or should I say that Eli’s new mommy will have to keep an eye on him?”
Her pulse skittered. She’d planned to tell him, but she should’ve thought about the possibility that Brodie or Savvy would’ve mentioned it first. “You know? What do you think? Do you think I’ll do okay?”
“I can’t imagine anyone who’d be better.”
“You believe that?” she asked, needing to hear it from someone. Moreover, needing to hear it from Gavin. Brodie and Savvy had both said the same thing, but for some reason his opinion carried more volume in her heart.
And she wouldn’t overanalyze why.
“I do believe it,” he said. “And I suspect that that dream of yours, what you wanted by age thirty, is about to come true.”
She tried to control her shock at his statement, but was certain all color had instantly drained from her face. “My dream?”
“You had planned on having children by the time you were thirty,” he said gruffly, “hadn’t you?” When she didn’t answer, he continued, “I’m just guessing, but I’m assuming you are close to thirty...”
“I turned thirty last month,” she whispered.
* * *
Gavin had thought he’d pegged her dream right because he had experience with that very goal. “That had been my original plan, too, a few years ago. I wanted to be settled, have a child, or two, by the time I was thirty,” he confided.
“I’m guessing you’re thirty?” she asked in the same tone he’d asked her the same question.
“I’ll be thirty-two on Valentine’s Day.”
“I can see you as a Valentine’s baby.” She tilted her head and looked at him as though wondering what he’d looked like as an infant.
“I was an ugly baby,” he confessed.
She laughed so hard she snorted. “Oh, I doubt that.”
He smirked, not only at the comment but also at the cuteness of the sound she made when she laughed.
“Have you given up on your dream?” she asked, running her fingers along the end of her ponytail as she spoke.
Gavin wondered if her hair was as soft as it looked. He also wondered what it would look like uncontained.
She waited for his answer.
He shrugged. “I haven’t necessarily given up on it. Sometimes dreams change a bit. But just because they may not look the way you originally intended, doesn’t mean you can’t still have them. I have my dream now.”
“You...have it?” she asked, her hand drifting away from the ponytai
l, her confusion obvious.
He nodded, smiled. “I have lots of children at Willow’s Haven. And I’ll have the opportunity to touch many more kids over the years while I’m working there.”
She chewed on her lower lip, seemed to think about what she was going to say. And then, finally, murmured, “I don’t see why you couldn’t touch lives at Willow’s Haven...and still have your original dream. You would be an amazing dad, Gavin.”
“And you,” he said hoarsely, putting a finger beneath her chin, “are going to be an amazing mom.” He smiled, almost not believing what he felt for the beautiful, intriguing lady. “I hope all your dreams come true, Haley.”
She moved toward him, only slightly, and a thick wave of hair slid loose from her ponytail and fell in one long curl in front of her right eye and cheek. She didn’t seem bothered by the obstruction, but Gavin touched the soft, springy ringlet and gently tucked it behind her ear.
“Gavin,” she whispered, her luminous eyes connecting with his.
He didn’t stop to think as he followed an instinct he hadn’t experienced...in over two years. Instead he closed the distance between them, his mouth finding hers and slowly sampling the sweetness of apples and cinnamon...and Haley Calhoun.
Chapter Fifteen
“I had a good thing, and I blew it,” Gavin said, ready to kick himself for letting the moment, the impulse, get away from him yesterday afternoon. He placed another piece of wood on the chopping block and split it in two.
Mark added the cut pieces to their growing pile then grabbed the next log for the block. “You keep saying that, but you still haven’t told me what you did.”
Gavin hadn’t stopped expressing his frustrations with himself, but he hadn’t wanted to tell the masses how badly he’d messed up with Haley.
Yet he was ready to talk. And somehow, try to repair the damage. Maybe Mark could provide advice on how to make that happen.
“Bottom line, I kissed her,” he muttered, letting the splitting ax fall and two more pieces hit the ground.
This time, the other man made no move to pick them up. “You kissed who? Haley Calhoun, I’m guessing?”
It’d be better if he could somehow control his grin.
“This isn’t a good thing.” Gavin picked up the pieces himself and slung them on the pile.
“Oh, I’d be very surprised if it wasn’t.”
Gavin wasn’t going to touch that by divulging details. Truthfully, the kiss...had rocked him to the core. He’d replayed it continually since it had happened.
He’d probably be replaying it the rest of his life.
It was that perfect.
So perfect, in fact, that he hadn’t wanted it to end.
And he couldn’t stop thinking about what it’d feel like to do it again. Hold her again. Cradle her face in his hands, look into those amazing green eyes and—
He. Needed. Help.
Gavin picked up another hunk of wood, since Mark had perched himself on the stacked pile and just sat there grinning from ear to ear, his arms folded across his chest, instead of helping Gavin chop wood. Or work his way out of this mess. “You don’t have any recommendation for how to fix this? Preferably before I have to take Eli to the clinic this afternoon to see Buddy?” He lifted the splitting ax, let it fall, then stepped back as one of the cut pieces nearly hit his foot.
“What is there to fix? I’d say you’re finally on the right path.”
“I’m not. I didn’t want this to go beyond friends. Don’t want any relationship to.” He wasn’t all that used to opening up, but his fellow counselor clearly didn’t get it, so he explained. “Yesterday, I told Haley about my plans for age thirty, how I wanted to be settled down and have kids by then.”
“O-kay,” Mark said, still not seeing the problem.
“The thing is, those weren’t merely my plans. They’d been my dream...with Selah. And I can’t do that to her. Think about those types of things, have those kinds of feelings, with someone else.” He shook his head. “I can’t.”
“But you are, aren’t you? There isn’t anything wrong with—”
“No. I’ve heard it all before and I don’t want to hear it again.” Gavin handed the splitting ax to his friend. “I don’t want another relationship. I don’t want to start over and risk everything again. And Haley deserves someone that can go all-in. That isn’t me. We could be great friends, and I need to see if we still can, if I didn’t ruin that completely yesterday.” He nodded at the rest of the wood. “Can you handle this without me?”
Mark smirked. “Like I need your help to chop wood. Is a bluebird blue? Where are you going?”
“To try to get things back to the way they were before that kiss.”
Mark whistled. “Yeah, I wouldn’t hold my breath.”
* * *
Haley’s heartbeat kicked it up a notch, or ten, when Gavin entered the clinic as she handed Landon Cutter a bag containing Roscoe’s monthly meds.
“Hey!” she said and then wished she hadn’t practically screamed her excitement at seeing him. She hadn’t stopped thinking about how very much she’d wanted that kiss and about how very much it’d rocked her to her core. It had felt so...right. Like a dream—her dream—coming true.
She’d been watching the door all day, anxiously waiting to see him again.
He smiled, a little awkwardly, which she thought was adorable. They’d have to wade these new waters carefully, learn how to balance their friendship along with their new relationship, the one that included long, amazing, knee-weakening kisses.
Haley’s hand drifted to her mouth and she fought the urge to giggle. Life had certainly taken a blissful turn yesterday, and she couldn’t wait to see what awaited them down this brand-new road.
“Gavin, good to see you,” Landon said. “I was just leaving.”
“Good to see you,” Gavin replied. “I—came to check on Eli’s dog, Buddy.”
Odd, Haley thought, that he felt the need to provide an explanation for coming to see her. But also sweet. As though he was shy about the fact that they would undoubtedly be seeing even more of each other, as they had moved beyond the “just friends” boundaries they’d previously set.
All in God’s time. Wasn’t that what everyone had said to her, about why she’d never found the right man? She should’ve trusted God the whole time, because, clearly, He had something better in store.
Gavin.
Landon turned to Haley. “Thanks again, Doc Calhoun.”
“You’re welcome.” She watched him leave, the door closing behind him, and then the realization that she was, once again, alone with Gavin hit her.
“I— How is Buddy?” His nervousness melted her heart. Had he also replayed that kiss over and over again throughout the night...and had he also seen a new vision for his future? One that included more than friendship and maybe all their dreams fulfilled?
“Buddy is doing great,” she said. “You want to come see him?”
He visibly swallowed, shifted from one foot to the other. “Sure.”
She led the way to the back and couldn’t help but notice how he looked even more masculine today, wearing a flannel shirt, sleeves rolled up to the elbows, well-worn jeans and hiking boots. She loved the sheer maleness that accompanied everything about Gavin Thomason. She’d known he would prove to be an amazing father figure for Eli.
But he’d also make an amazing dad.
She tried to control how quickly her heart was putting the cart before the horse. Slow. They’d need to take this slow. Because he hadn’t even wanted a relationship again, until yesterday.
But she could be patient. Her happily-ever-after was certainly worth the wait.
“There’s our little man,” she said, grinning at Buddy. “He’s still a bit groggy, but doing much better today.”
“The IV is gone,” he n
oted.
“Yeah, he’s really doing well. I’m sure he’ll be even better this afternoon when Eli visits.”
Gavin moved to the puppy, tenderly touched his finger to his forehead and Buddy nuzzled against it. “You’re a good boy, aren’t you?”
“He is,” Haley agreed. “Just need to keep him away from the marbles, or probably anything else that he might ingest.” She smirked. “Which may prove to be a challenge.”
“We can handle it,” he said, and she liked the way he’d said we. Then she looked at him, and he wasn’t smiling. In fact, he was frowning.
“Something happen with Eli?” she asked, concerned.
“No, nothing with Eli,” he answered, but she could tell he had something on his mind.
“Come on, we’ll go back up front and you can tell me.”
They walked to the lobby and he moved to the same spot where he’d been yesterday, leaning against the counter. Haley, likewise, hopped up on top of the counter next to him, exactly where she’d been when they’d kissed.
“Aaliyah is working today, but she shouldn’t get here for about a half hour.” She wanted to let him know they had a little time to talk privately. And for him to kiss her again, if he was so inclined. Her heart fluttered in anticipation. “What is it?”
“Haley...” he said slowly.
Her nerve endings instantly bristled against her skin. She knew that tone. Had heard it before.
Too many times.
She blinked, not wanting to even ask him to finish whatever he was about to say. She knew before he confirmed it with his words.
He’d...changed his mind.
“I...” he started.
She held her breath.
“I...don’t know what I was thinking yesterday afternoon. Or rather, what I was doing. I shouldn’t have kissed you.” He looked away from her, shifted his position against the counter so that he wasn’t even inferring closeness to her, already putting distance between them. “I meant it when I said I can’t offer more than friendship, and I know...I know that was your plan, too.”
“My plan changed,” she blurted then wished she could stuff the words back in.
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