H7N9 Penitence

by Mark Campbell

“What do you think I did?” Eddie asked. “I shot that cowardly prick right in his stupid face. It was tense and there was a standoff with some of the other guys who wasn’t sure what to do, but in the end eight of us walked away after that incident while the others drove back to the stadium.”

  “You did the right thing,” Teddy said.

  “No, brother,” Eddie said with a smile. “It’s not my place to take another man’s life, but I guess I have to take that up with God when it’s my turn. All I’m saying is reconsider going to that stadium.” He gestured around the camp. “I know this isn’t much, and people may have their doubts about you, but they’ll warm up to you eventually. When I first met Mariah and Al’s group I was an AWOL soldier who was still in his uniform. You can imagine how well that went. They hated me with a passion just because of what I was wearing, but in the end - they took me in as one of their own. It’ll be the same with you once everyone’s emotions settle down. Give them time, Teddy.”

  Eddie walked towards Teddy and extended his hand with a smile.

  Teddy reached out and grabbed his hand.

  “Welcome home,” Eddie said with a smile as he shook Teddy’s hand with a firm grip.

  Teddy smiled back and nodded.

  “Don’t listen to him, Teddy,” Big Al said as he approached from around the corner with a grin. “Whatever he’s telling you is a lie. Trust me, I’ve played poker with him and he took me to the cleaners every time.”

  Eddie laughed. He let go of Teddy’s hand and gave Big Al a half-hearted salute.

  “I was just telling my new friend Teddy here what a great and fearless leader you are, that’s all,” Eddie said with a smirk.

  “See? Nothing but lies!” Big Al exclaimed.

  “You have quite an assortment here,” Teddy said.

  “Yeah, but I guess I’m stuck with them, like it or not,” Big Al replied.

  As Eddie walked past, Big Al reached up and grabbed his shoulder.

  Eddie stopped.

  “I know it’s not your shift, but if you’re free, go down and relieve Joey for a bit, will ya?” Big Al asked. “Since we’re short, he’s on a double and looking a little crossed-eyed.”

  Eddie nodded, turned the corner, and walked away.

  “I thought that you had disappeared on us,” Teddy told Big Al.

  “Yeah, sorry about that, but I didn’t think this stuff would be so hard to come by,” Big Al said as he pulled a half-full bottle of children’s Benadryl out of his pocket. “Is the boy up?”

  Teddy nodded and pointed towards the tent.

  “They both are last I checked,” Teddy said.

  “Good,” Big Al said with a smile. He lumbered along towards the tent, pulled open the flap, and stepped inside.

  Teddy followed him.

  The tent was surprisingly spacious and comfortable.

  Three sleeping bags lying atop multiple blankets covered what would have been cold concrete. A large blue tarp was suspended from the ceiling by nylon cords while a simple string of white Christmas lights wrapped around the cords provided warm ambiance.

  Jane sat cross-legged on one of the sleeping bags wearing a men’s black t-shirt and baggy sweatpants. Her hair was pulled back into a tight ponytail and her face was washed clean for the first time in several days.

  Danny sat in front of her and played with wooden blocks meant for a child much younger than he was. He looked bored as he haphazardly stacked one block on the next and then sent them tumbling over. He was wearing a white polo and overalls that were too small. His hair was damp with sweat and his nose was bright red from blowing it continuously.

  Jane looked up at Big Al and smiled as soon as she saw the bottle of Benadryl in his hand.

  “I thought you forgot,” she said with relief. “He’s been stuffy ever since dinner.”

  “It was hard to track down, but I delivered as promised,” Big Al said with a beaming grin. He crouched down next to Danny and ruffled his hair with his hand.

  Teddy walked past them and took a seat opposite them at the far end of the tent.

  Danny let out a huffy sigh, reached up, swatted Big Al’s calloused hand away, and fixed his messy hair.

  “Stawwwwp!” Danny whined. “You’ll give me tangles.”

  Big Al laughed.

  “How are you feeling, little man?” Big Al asked.

  “I’m bored,” Danny admitted. “I miss my trucks.” He knocked the blocks aside. “These are baby toys!”

  “Be nice,” Jane scolded.

  Danny looked down and sulked.

  “Sorry, little man,” Big Al said with a frown. “Toys haven’t been high on the list, but I’ll tell the scouts to bring you back something nice tomorrow morning, okay?”

  Danny’s face brightened and he looked over at him expectantly.

  “Promise?” Danny asked.

  “Cross my heart,” Big Al said as he mimicked the motion.

  Danny smiled.

  “Thank you, mister,” Danny said. “You’re a nice man even though you have a scary beard.”

  Big Al chuckled and ran his fingers through his bush.

  “I’m not sure how to take that, but I’ll just call it a compliment,” Big Al said.

  “Thank you for everything,” Jane told him.

  “It’s no problem,” Big Al said. “Are you sure you don’t want to stay here a few more days?”

  Jane hesitated and looked over at Teddy.

  Teddy looked back at her and then up at Big Al.

  “We’ll talk about it in the morning,” Teddy told him.

  “Fair enough,” Big Al said with a nod. “In the meantime, it’s about to be lights out so you better get your boy some medicine and try to get some sleep. Once we power down the generators it gets pretty dark in here quick.”

  Big Al handed Jane the bottle of Benadryl.

  “Thank you again,” Jane said. “And… I’m really sorry.”

  “About what?” he asked.

  “Mariah and the others,” she said. “I know they meant–.”

  “She’s fine,” Big Al interrupted. “I’ve seen that girl in action and I know she can handle herself. She’s lying low for the night, but she’ll be back soon.”

  Big Al’s expression darkened and his eyes started to water.

  Jane stared at him with concern.

  “I’m sorry,” she said. “I didn’t mean to–”

  “Get some rest,” Big Al quickly said as he wiped his eyes with his hand and forced a smile. “I’ll see you in the morning.”

  Big Al stepped out of the tent and closed the flap.

  Jane looked at Teddy, flustered, while Danny went back to stacking blocks.

  “Don’t feel bad,” Teddy said. “I spoke with someone and apparently we’re the gossip of the camp at the moment. That Mariah was well-liked so it isn’t hard to point the finger at a couple of strangers.”

  “I figured as much,” Jane said with a sigh. She opened the bottle of medicine and poured out a dose. “I got that vibe at dinner. That’s why I wanted to say something.”

  “Mama, when can we go home?” Danny asked as he toppled his tower of blocks over once again.

  “Soon, sweetheart,” she said with a fake smile. “For now I need you to take your medicine so you feel better.”

  Jane handed Danny the medicine cup.

  He looked at it with disgust.

  “Do I have to drink it?” he asked.

  “If you do, I’ll make sure you get a real nice toy very soon,” she promised.

  That was all the convincing it took.

  Danny took the cup and quickly downed the pink liquid. He made a face and stuck his tongue out as he handed the empty cup back to her.

  “Thank you, sweetheart,” she said as she screwed the cap back on and sat the medicine aside. “Why don’t you lie down for a few minutes and close your eyes?”

  “Why?” Danny asked. “I’m not even sleepy.”

  Despite his protests, Danny curled up on his mothe
r’s lap and closed his eyes.

  Jane gently ran her fingers through his hair and down his back as she stared down at him, smiling.

  Teddy watched her, fascinated. The way her face lit up every time she glanced at Danny was an even more beautiful sight than the sun setting in the Arizona sky.

  After just a few minutes, Danny was fast asleep and snoring quietly in her lap.

  “You remind me of someone,” Teddy said quietly as he stared at her, smiling.

  “Your wife?” she teased.

  Teddy lost his smile.

  “Ex-wife, actually,” he muttered.

  Jane looked up at him doubtfully.

  “It’s true,” he said. “After I was locked up, I got the papers during mail call a few months later.”

  “Can’t blame her though.”

  “No,” he admitted. “Why should she suffer just because I fucked up?” He paused and reflected on it a moment. “Honestly, before I did what I did, she was a good woman… She was sweet, you know?”

  “Do you still love her?”

  “I reckon not,” Teddy said. “Too much time has passed and we’re two very different people.” He shook his head. “I was just saying that watching you with your boy reminded me of her. You know, the woman I used to know.”

  Jane leaned back and looked at him while she stroked Danny.

  “Why tell me this now?” she asked.

  Teddy thought about it and shrugged.

  “I don’t know,” he finally said. “I guess it just feels weird. We’re practically strangers.”

  “San Francisco,” Jane said.

  “What?” he asked with confusion.

  “That’s where I was born.” She paused. “Your turn.”

  “Dallas.”

  “What brought you from Dallas?”

  “Bad decisions. What brought you from San Francisco?”

  “Same, except my bad decision had a dick,” she said. She smiled down at Danny. “Some good came out of it though.” She looked back at Teddy. “My favorite color is blue.”

  “Red,” he fired back.

  “Pepsi.”

  “Coke all the way.”

  “Libra.”

  “Gemini.”

  “Really?” she asked with disbelief. “I could’ve sworn that you were a hard-headed Capricorn.”

  Teddy grinned and rolled his eyes.

  “I’ve never believed in all that stuff,” he said. “My grandma used to rub her bingo card with a nasty old rabbit’s foot that she kept in her purse and I never saw it do her any favors.”

  “You never know,” Jane said whimsically. “So do you feel better now? Do you feel like we bonded?”

  Teddy looked at her and blinked.

  “Is it so bad for wanting to know you a little bit?” he asked.

  “I just don’t see the point,” Jane said flatly. “Once we’re in that stadium, we’ll be going separate ways, right?”

  Teddy remained silent and just stared at her.

  “Is that what you want?” he eventually asked.

  “Does it matter?” she asked. “The question I’m asking myself is why are you still here? What do you want?”

  Teddy feel silent again, thinking.

  “Look, Teddy, I get it,” she continued. “I understand that you’ve been locked up and you’re only human, but I’m not going to be a free lay for you. I’m not that type of girl.”

  “I never thought you were,” Teddy said indignantly. “I’ve called you all sorts of not-so-pleasant words in my head, especially when you had me cuffed to a bed, but the word slut never crossed my mind.”

  “Then what is it? What’s keeping you here?” she asked.

  Teddy didn’t respond.

  “I’ve been looking after my son for a very long time and never needed anybody’s help in doing so. The last thing I want, no, the last thing I need, is to get someone else wrapped up in this.” She paused and stared into his eyes. “I don’t want you or anybody else hanging around out of pity or some obligation. I’m capable. I don’t know what sort of arrangement you think we have, but if you want out, I won’t hold it against you. That’s what I’m trying to tell you.”

  Teddy thought over what she said and took it all in.

  “What if I told you that if it was simple as the fact that I like your company?” he finally asked as he stared back into her eyes. “What if I told you that being here with you and Danny brings me some sort of peace? What if I told you that, despite everything going on outside, I actually feel happy being with you?”

  Jane’s icy glare softened and a smile formed across her lips.

  “I’d say you’re crazy,” she replied softly.

  Teddy smiled back.

  “There’s nowhere else I’d rather be right now - at this very moment - than here inside this stuffy tent on some dirty old sleeping bags with you,” Teddy said. “If that makes me crazy, so be it.”

  Jane blushed, smiled, and looked around their tent as she kept stroking Danny’s back.

  “I guess we’ll have to trade this tent in for a rusty army cot once we get to the stadium,” she mused, changing the subject.

  “Maybe,” Teddy said. “But then again, maybe not…”

  Jane looked at him with intrigue.

  “Why is that?” she asked. “Do you plan on asking for a room upgrade at check-in?”

  “No, smartass,” he said with a grin. “I’m just saying that things are pretty decent here… Maybe we can take up Big Al’s offer and stay here a few days to see how we fit in.”

  Jane studied his face for a few seconds with skepticism.

  “What made you change your mind?” she finally asked. “You don’t seem the type of guy who gets taken in by a few pleasantries and flashy lights.”

  “When I was standing outside, some guy came up and we talked about the stadium,” Teddy explained.

  “Some guy? That’s vague.”

  “Ex-military apparently,” Teddy said with a shrug. “From what he said, the stadium doesn’t sound so ideal after all.”

  “Didn’t I tell you that I had my doubts about that place a long time ago?”

  “You did,” he admitted. “I needed to believe in it though. I needed some sort of hope, so I just didn’t want to listen to what you had to say.”

  “That seems to be a rather annoying trait of yours,” she teased.

  Teddy simply looked at her and raised his middle finger at her.

  Jane laughed.

  “What do you think about it though?” he asked.

  “About what?”

  “Staying here for a while…”

  “Oh, I was already planning on it,” she said without hesitating. “If you were hell-bent on marching across the city to that cesspool stadium, I wasn’t going to stop you.” She paused and gave him a catty grin. “But it’s nice of you to ask.”

  Teddy looked at her in shock.

  “You’re serious?” he asked in disbelief. “You were going to just let me walk out there all by myself.”

  “Oh please,” Jane said, rolling her eyes. “I saw your big stupid smile when you were slurping down that stew they served at dinner. I knew right then that you weren’t going anywhere.”

  They both started laughing.

  Danny mumbled and rolled over in his sleep.

  They quieted down and Jane went back to gently stroking his back.

  “Do you know why I decided to travel with you?” Jane asked as she focused her attention back at Teddy.

  “Not really,” Teddy admitted. “I didn’t want to ask because I didn’t want to jinx it.”

  “I did it because Danny likes you,” she said.

  “I like the little guy, too,” Teddy said with a smile. “How do you figure though?”

  “Ever since the power went out, it was rare to see him smile. Now that you’ve been around, he’s almost acting like his old self. When I watched you two interact, I knew I didn’t have any choice but to go with you no matter how stupid your stadium p
lan was.” She paused and laughed quietly. “I mean, he gave you his stuffed lion, his most prized possession. You have no idea how big of deal that is.”

  “Given how seriously he took it, I had some notion,” Teddy said with a chuckle.

  “You’re good with him,” Jane said with reluctant admiration.

  “Thanks. I can’t along with others for shit, but for some reason I’ve always been good with kids.”

  “Do you have any?”

  “Nah…” Teddy said with a tired drawl. “Always wanted some though. Didn’t give it much thought after I got locked up.” He looked at her and grinned. “Is this twenty questions time again?”

  “That game bores me,” Jane answered. “How about we say something about ourselves and then the other person has to guess if it was a truth or a lie?”

  Teddy laughed and shook his head.

  “You’re just a kid at heart, aren’t you?” he teased.

  “Who says getting to know each other can’t be interesting?” she asked dismissively. “So… truth or lie. I love reading romance novels.”

  “I’m going to have to call bullshit on that one.”

  “Correct,” Jane said with a smile. “Since you got lucky, I have to go again. Let’s see… Before the virus struck, I was a manager at a large purchasing center.”

  “Since you don’t take any shit and like to boss people around, I believe it. Truth.”

  “Bravo,” she said, impressed. “Your turn.”

  Teddy thought for a moment.

  “I love reading anything, including romance novels,” he eventually said.

  “You’re lying,” Jane said cautiously as she narrowed her eyes.

  “Wrong,” Teddy chimed back. “Before my time inside, you’d be right, but prison changes a person sometimes in really weird ways.”

  “Romance novels? Really?” Jane asked with a disgusted look. “Wow, my opinion of you just went down a few notches.”

  They both laughed quietly.

  “So now it’s your turn, right?” Teddy asked, still smiling.

  “Yep!” she exclaimed. “Let me think of a good one… Hmm…”

  Suddenly, the Christmas lights went dark.

  Jane gave a muted scream.

  Teddy stood up quickly and felt his way towards the tent’s opening. He peeked his head outside and looked around as his eyes adjusted to the darkness.

  “Is everything alright?” she asked as she looked up at him.