“Bad enough the bike’s totalled.”
“That sucks.”
“Yep.”
For a few minutes we sat in silence, both lost in our own thoughts. I was staring vacantly across the field but not really paying attention. For some reason I started thinking about my mum. Fuck knows where it’d come from, but suddenly I was overcome by this sadness that wrapped around me like a blanket trying to suffocate me.
I hadn’t spoken to her in, I don’t even know how long. She hadn’t come to the hospital when I’d been admitted and she hadn’t shown up since I’d been home either. I don’t even know if she knew what had been going on. Had Beau called her? Had Dad? Part of me hoped they hadn’t. A big part. It was easier to believe she didn’t know and that’s why she wasn’t here than the alternative. If she knew, if she had half a clue what’s been going on in my life and how much I needed her right now and she chose to stay away, well, I don’t know if I’d recover from that. Living in denial seemed to be working for me. At least for now.
Fingering my phone in my pocket, I thought about texting her, but then again, what would I say? Hi Mum, remember me? I couldn’t do it. Not now anyway.
“Heads!” someone cried out but I wasn’t paying attention. Not enough.
I reacted slowly. Too slowly. I didn’t see the soccer ball as it continued on its path directly towards my head.
When I sat up my head was pounding, my cheeks burning, my glasses snapped in two, and I was surrounded by people staring down at me.
“Geez, Holly! You okay?”
How the fuck would I know? My eye felt like it was the size of a grapefruit. Tears welled in my eyes from the pain but when I lifted my head and saw the huge group of people staring down at me, I blinked them back. The last thing I needed was for anyone to see me cry. I was still the new girl. I didn’t need to be known as the crying new girl.
“Fine,” I muttered as I dusted my hands against my thighs and rose to my feet.
“Why am I not surprised that it’s her getting all the attention again?” a bitchy, whiny voice complained.
“Cut it out, Caitlyn,” Brian warned as he wobbled on his foot. Without thinking I bent down and grabbed his crutches.
“What?”
“Just don’t, Caitlyn. Haven’t you got someone else you can go and make miserable?” someone asked from behind me. He had a deep, velvety voice which made my knees buckle. I wasn’t used to having anyone stand up for me besides my brothers, so any volunteers to play the role of my knight in shining armour were welcomed right now.
The pounding in my head was incessant and instant. My nose hurt. I hoped I wouldn’t have any bruising. If history was anything to go on though, I was not going to get out of this unscathed. I’d undoubtedly get a souvenir egg on my head to commemorate the occasion.
Spinning around, a little too fast probably, I wobbled on my feet and a giant hand grabbed my elbow roughly.
“Take it easy, Holly. Jack’ll kick my ass if I let you face plant.” Looking up into the eyes of my saviour, I found it was Zach standing beside me, dimples prominently on display and mischief in his eyes.
“You’re hot.”
As soon as it was out of my mouth I wished it wasn’t. Not that it was a lie…more that I didn’t need to announce it in front of the whole school. A tiny bit of drama around here and all hell broke loose. All I did was get hit in the face with a wayward soccer ball.
“I…I’ve got to go.” Yanking my bag up off the ground, I’d forgotten how heavy it was and nearly knocked myself over. I was not having a good ten minutes. In fact, if the earth wanted to open up right in front of me and swallow me whole, I wouldn’t object. Anything to get out from under the steely gaze of pretty much the entire school.
I made it halfway across the field before the tears started. I don’t know if they were from the utter humiliation of what had just happened or the raging headache I was now battling. Either way, I had to get out of there.
“Holly! Holly!” I could hear a deep, male voice calling to me, but I just kept my head down and kept walking. Right now, I didn’t want to talk to anyone. I just wanted to go home, grab some painkillers, dive under the covers, and pretend this day never happened. This week didn’t happen. This life didn’t happen.
I made it to the office and quickly explained the situation. One look at me by the old bat at the admin desk and she excused me for the rest of the day. At least one thing was going my way today. She offered to call Beau, who’d listed himself as my emergency contact, but I waved it off. After promising I was fine and I’d just head to my sister in law’s, she allowed me to leave. Apparently she was one of Payton’s biggest fans when it came to her scones with fresh cream and homemade strawberry jam.
Before anything else had a chance to go wrong, I ducked out the front door, down the steps, and onto the footpath. I needed some time and space to be miserable all on my own. No one needed to know I wasn’t going to Payton’s bakery—well, not just yet, anyway. First, I needed to find a quiet place to go and lick my wounds.
Chapter Eight
Jack
Dad was trying. I had to at least give him credit for that. He just didn’t get me anymore. He didn’t know me anymore. It was probably my fault just as much as his, but still. Right now, cramped in the cabin of this damn truck with a shot suspension was not my idea of a fun way to spend a Monday afternoon.
It’d been a weird day all round. This morning, I’d woken to find Dad in the kitchen frying bacon. I wasn’t hungry, but the smell was just too damn enticing to bypass. Together we’d sat down and eaten in silence. Me playing on my phone—some stupid block building game—and him, reading the paper and grunting. He’d mentioned something about going away today to some cattle sale down on the border. I think I muttered something along the lines of ‘cool’ but didn’t really give two shits. It was Monday and I had school.
After getting out the door I made it to school with time to spare. Something completely out of character for me really. I was the kid teachers loved to hate. Generally, I’d rock in five minutes late, offer them a half-hearted shrug and a smile and they’d say nothing. Why I got away with it I had no idea, but I did. And I fucking loved it.
Today though, everyone was pulling into the car park at the same time. When I’d run into Holly, I’d barely recognised her. Her once long brown curls were gone and now she was sporting some kind of weird ass bright red hairstyle. It suited her. Even though it wasn’t going to help her fit in one little bit. I got the feeling though, Holly wasn’t born to fit in. When Zach and Brian fell in step with me, we started mucking about as usual. We were idiots. Most of the time we were just completely rude, crude, and happy to be. Yet when Holly joined in our banter, including dropping a joke which had my stomach aching from trying to hold back the laughter, I realised she belonged.
When the bell rang, we’d all headed to class, some quicker than the others. The morning had dragged its ass. Monday always did, but for some reason today felt infinitely more painful than others, so when I was summoned to the front office, I was more than happy to escape the maths equations playing havoc with my head.
Finding Dad standing in the principal’s office was not what I was expecting. Straight away, my body went stiff and my mind bolted. A million thoughts raced through my head. Was Mum okay? Had something happened? Had I done anything wrong? What had they found out about? I mean, I was a teenage idiot. I’d done some pretty stupid shit over the years, but it’d always been harmless. Well, mostly it was.
My heart was pounding and I could hear the blood racing through my veins as I buried my sweaty hands in my pockets. For a full minute I stood there, watching Dad and the principal, a crusty old guy who wore his brown pants pulled up too high and his tie crooked, shoot the shit. While I was standing there, trying desperately not to panic, they were chatting about the weather and the local football team’s latest results. Like I gave a shit! Really.
Turns out, nothing was wrong. Mum was fine, a
s far as everyone knew, although she hadn’t been in contact in days and I hadn’t been caught doing anything dumb. Thankfully. Dad just wanted to pull me out of school for the rest of the day and tomorrow so I could go with him to this damn cattle sale. I was fucking thrilled. Not.
Which brings me back to now. Sitting in the cab, drinking my now warm bottle of Coke, staring out the window at the nothingness around me. Dad was behind the wheel with a grin covering his face. He never smiled. At least he hadn’t smiled in a long time. It was both good to see and kinda freaky at the same time. He had the radio on, some talk back bullshit. For a moment I found myself wishing I was back in that stuffy classroom, in the uncomfortable plastic chairs pretending to listen while the maths teacher babbled on about the distance between Earth and Mars. Who the hell cares? It wasn’t like anyone in my class was going to grow up to be an astronaut. Hell, only one or two would even go on to University. I found it a complete waste of time, really. It would have been more productive to focus on area and measurement that would actually help us in the real world. Yet every time someone brought it up, we just got shut down. I’d given up the fight ages ago. Zach though, he couldn’t let it go, the stubborn ass that he was.
“What time does the sale start?” I asked, checking my watch. It was already after two. The way Dad drove, like a damn old lady, we wouldn’t be there until after dark. If I had to go to this thing, I at least wanted to see something. Not drive all this way and miss it.
“First thing tomorrow morning.”
“Oh.”
“Don’t you want to be here?” he asked, his eyes not leaving the road. Glancing down at where he was holding the steering wheel, I noticed how tight his grip was.
Feeling like a complete ass, I assured him I did. I may have lied a little when I emphasised how much I wanted to be there, but I didn’t want to hurt his feelings. Since Mum was gone, Dad looked lonely. Sure, all they did was fight and bitch and argue, but at least there was someone to argue with. Now all he had left was me—a pretty poor substitute. Settling back in the seat, I tugged my baseball cap low over my eyes and drifted off. A nap would help. A nap helped everything.
When I woke, we were pulling into a service station in the middle of nowhere. At least that’s what it felt like. Groaning, I stretched my arms up above my head, wincing as they creaked at every movement. God, I felt old. I was barely eighteen, yet I felt a hundred.
“Well, good morning, sleeping beauty,” Dad teased as he dug his wallet from the glove compartment.
“Hey,” I grumbled as I rubbed my hands over my face. “Where are we?”
“About fifteen minutes out. I wanted to grab some supplies and petrol before we headed to the stockyards. Want anything?”
Stockyards? Supplies? I was way too slow on the uptake, really. Of course, we’d be camping by the yards. It’s what we always did on these trips. I didn’t know where I’d even gotten the idea that a hotel bed and a hot shower were in my future. Maybe it was just wishful thinking.
“Yeah, I’ll come with.” Unbuckling my seatbelt, I jumped from the truck and shivered as the cold wind whipped around my face. I was still wearing my jeans and a t-shirt, and I was shocked by how cool it’d become. The sun had already disappeared over the horizon and the only light was coming from the single fluorescent bulb flickering in the street light across the road and the dull lights inside the service station, if it could even be called that.
Ducking around the back while Dad filled the fuel tank, I took a leak and washed my face. The second the icy water hit my face, I was wide awake. I hoped there was something to do there or someone to talk to. After my long ass nap and the icy wake up call, I knew I wasn’t going to crash anytime soon.
Inside the service station, my dinner options were limited. Toying with the idea of forgoing dinner altogether, my stomach protested loudly. Grabbing a couple of bottles of Coke from the fridge, I stood in front of the hot food display and grimaced. The single frankfurter lying in a pool of grey coloured water didn’t look appealing at all. In fact, I found myself wondering exactly how long it’d been lying there, waiting for someone to choose it. That someone wasn’t going to be me. I didn’t need to suffer from a bout of diarrhoea while camping. Not going to happen. Taking the safe option, or safer option, I grabbed two sausage rolls and a packet of potato chips. Not exactly the dinner of champions, but it’d do. I’d had worse.
After we paid, we got back in the truck and headed towards the yards. With the windows down, I knew we were getting closer because we could hear the mooing from the cattle as they snorted and shuffled about in their tiny pens, ready for tomorrow’s madness.
This wasn’t my first rodeo, I’d done this before, but for some reason this time felt different. I think it’d been three or four years since I’d last been dragged to one of these. Usually Dad and one of the hands would go, while I stayed behind with Mum. I remember complaining each and every time I was left behind, but now I was beginning to look at things differently.
After pulling in alongside another truck, Dad got out and immediately started gossiping with some of the other old dudes standing around the huge fire in the drum. Needing a minute, I dug my phone from my pocket, annoyed that I didn’t have much battery left. Had I have known I was taking a road trip today, I would have grabbed my charger and probably my toothbrush before we left. Instead, all I had with me was what I had on when Dad arrived. Not much.
I was surprised to see more than a dozen messages pop up and a few missed calls. I hadn’t even heard it ring. Either we’d driven through patches that didn’t get reception, not uncommon out this way, or I’d been dead to the world. Either way, I’d obviously missed something.
Checking in on the messages, I read Zach’s first.
Zach: U should check on ur gf
I absolutely HATED it when he spoke text speak. I mean, with predictive text and autocorrect, how damn hard was it to spell entire words out? At least if he used full words I wouldn’t be struggling all the time to figure out what the hell he was trying to say.
Zach: Looked bad
Zach: She OK?
What the fuck was he talking about? Was who okay? How the hell would I know? Quickly I replied to him and skimmed the others. If he was trying to tell me something, I needed more details.
As I got to the last message, the number caught my attention. It wasn’t a number I recognised. Occasionally I got the random text meant for someone else. And then there was that brief period when Amber and Caitlyn had got hold of my number and thought it would be funny to message me random shit from all different numbers day in, day out. It lasted about a week before I changed my number and kicked their scrawny little asses. I didn’t get those two. I mean, I tried. I’d spent way more hours than they deserved trying to figure out what their end game was. Why they were so hell bent on annoying the ever loving shit out of me all the time? In the end I was as clueless as before. Maybe if they wanted attention they could try, I dunno, being nice for a change. You catch more flies with honey and all that shit.
Clicking open the unknown message, I prayed it wasn’t another photo like the other night. I couldn’t deal with that right now. Not when I was too far away to do anything about it.
Unknown: Hey it’s Ryan. Have you seen Holly? She hasn’t got home yet and no one’s heard from her. If she’s with you or you know where she is, can you let us know? Cheers.
“Fuck!” I growled, hitting the dash with my fist. The packet of mints open in the corner rattled and fell to the floor. I didn’t give a shit. I couldn’t.
After adding Ryan’s number to my contacts, I dialled. I only had five percent battery life left. I didn’t have time to stuff around with text messaging.
“Jack?”
“Hey Ryan. Sorry, I just got your message. I’m out of town with Dad.”
“Oh.” I heard the disappointment in his voice and felt it deep in my heart. How had I got so involved in Holly’s life so quickly? That chick was a damn witch, and she was go
ing to be the death of me.
“I haven’t seen her since this morning. All was good then. Could she be with a friend?” I knew I sounded hopeful. I was praying that was the answer.
“Does she have any friends?” Ryan asked sadly.
His question hurt. Physically hurt me. I knew he wasn’t being an asshole, if he was, I wouldn’t have hesitated to call him out on it, but coming from Ryan, it was a genuine question. “I don’t know. I don’t think so.”
“All right. Well, I better let you go. I’m sure she’s fine,” he lied. I mightn’t have been able to see his face, but I knew he didn’t believe that. Not for a second. And I couldn’t blame him.
“Let me know when she gets home?”
“Sure. Have fun, Jack.” He ended the call before I had a chance to ask any more questions.
With only two percent left, I pocketed my phone, jumped from the cab, and headed towards the fire. Surely someone would have a charger I could borrow.
It was after three, at least I think it was, when I looked through blurry eyes at my now fully charged phone. It hadn’t taken me long to find someone who could charge it, but along with finding someone young enough to even own a smart phone, I also found the beers and stories…thus the pain shooting through my hip as I staggered back to the truck.
Climbing into the cabin, I realised I had no idea where Dad was sleeping, and right now I didn’t really care. I was too tired and the morning would come soon enough. They always did at these things. Kicking off my shoes, I spread out best I could across the seats and closed my eyes.
“Jack! Jack!” Someone, some asshole, was bellowing my name too loudly and way to close. Asshole. Dropping my forearm over my eyes, I willed the sun away and the noise to stop. Instead it increased, and now came with the shaking of my knee.
“Come on! Get up!”
Cracking open my eyes, I dug the dried sleep from the corners and sat up. Sleeping in the cabin may not have been my smartest move. My back ached and my knee, which had somehow become wedged between the steering wheel and the seat, was locked in place. Even after god knows how many nights spent asleep in my swag in the back of my ute or on the ground, this was worse. Far worse.
Meet The McIntyres - The Complete Series Page 56