Then Came Indecision (Southern Love #2)

by E. L. Todd

  “It’s late,” he said. “Let’s go to bed.”

  “Okay.”

  He helped her down the ladder and they walked into the house. Paul grabbed her and kissed her on the forehead. “Goodnight.”

  “Goodnight,” she whispered. Like a zombie, she walked into her bedroom and put on her nightshirt. She wasn’t tired, too depressed to close her eyes. She never felt more alone in her life. She tossed and turned but couldn’t fight the pain she felt.

  Eventually, she left her room and walked into the living room. Paul was lying on the couch, his eyes closed. He was shirtless, sleeping in his boxers. She stared at him for a moment before she cuddled beside him. There wasn’t much room so she had to lay on him.

  He stirred at her arrival. He looked at her but didn’t say anything.

  Alexandra clutched him tightly then closed her eyes.

  “There isn’t much room out here,” he whispered. He sat up and cradled her in his arms before he walked down the hallway and into her bedroom. He placed her on the bed before he crawled beside her.

  Alexandra wrapped her entire body around him, finding comfort in the heat and strength of his body. Nothing was said but the protection was still there. His hand moved through her hair, trying to calm her.

  “You’re always safe with me, baby.”

  His final words put her to sleep.

  Chapter Seventeen

  Alexandra was too depressed to wake up early to attend to the fields. The cotton would survive without water for the day. She lied in Paul’s arms, feeling his chest against her back. She didn’t want to move or live her life. She wanted to stay there forever.

  Paul kissed the back of her neck then her shoulder. “Don’t you have class, baby?” he said with a deep voice.

  “No.”

  “I think you do.”

  “I don’t care,” she whispered.

  He kissed her shoulder again.

  She turned over and pressed her face close to his.

  He stared at her then kissed her forehead. “You look beautiful in the morning. I guess I just forgot how much.”

  Alexandra ran her hand down his strong chest, feeling the strength in his body. The tattoo was mesmerizing. She could stare at it all day. His boxers hung low and his erection was prominent under the fabric. She looked away when she realized she was staring.

  Paul adjusted himself. “Sorry…it happens every morning.”

  Her cheeks blushed. “It’s okay.”

  He ran his hand down her arm and across her stomach. She was just wearing a t-shirt and underwear but she didn’t feel uncomfortable around him. His hand slid down her legs, feeling the smoothness. “I love your legs.”

  “Thanks.”

  He leaned down and kissed her inner thigh.

  She felt her heart accelerate. The intimate touch rekindled the desire she felt. Her depression was still there but slightly numbed.

  He came back to her then settled next to her. “Are we shacking up in here today? Because I don’t mind if we do as long as we have food and water.”

  “That sounds nice,” she said with sigh.

  “Then let’s do it.”

  She wrapped her arms around his neck and snuggled next to him.

  His arm linked around her waist and held her close. His erection pressed against her. There was no way for him to hide it in his thin boxers. “Let me make you some breakfast.”

  “I’m not hungry,” she said sadly.

  “Not even for Mickey Mouse pancakes?”

  She smiled. “We don’t have a skillet for that.”

  “I’ll figure it out,” he said with a smile.

  “I’ll help.”

  He got out of bed and dressed himself. When he turned around and pulled down is boxers, Alexandra glanced at his ass. It was hard and defined. She caught herself staring before she looked away. She put on her clothes then they walked outside.

  Martha was sitting at the table, reading the paper. She raised an eyebrow. “Good morning.”

  Alexandra didn’t care what her aunt thought of her. “Morning.”

  Paul turned to her. “We are making pancakes. Would you like some?”

  “Sure, dear.” Martha watched them work in the kitchen. “Sleep well?”

  “Really well,” Alexandra said as she glared at her.

  “Why do I suspect you didn’t do much sleeping?”

  Paul smiled but didn’t respond.

  Alexandra rolled her eyes.

  She and Paul made pancakes on the skillet. After many attempts at making mouse ears, the cakes kept turning into misshaped figures. When one looked like the shape of Italy, they laughed hysterically then gave up.

  They came to the table and ate their pancakes and eggs. Martha sipped her coffee. “Not working in the field today?”

  “No,” Alexandra said. “I’ll do it tomorrow.”

  Martha nodded.

  Paul placed his arm over the back of her chair while he ate. “Have you considered selling the property?”

  “No,” she said without taking her eyes away from the paper.

  “You’re going to have to figure out something eventually,” Alexandra said.

  “I’m fine,” Martha said.

  “You’re always welcome to live with me and Alexandra in the city. It’s very different from Georgia but I’m sure you’d like it.”

  “That’s very sweet but no thank you.” She sipped her coffee.

  Alexandra sighed. “You’re so stubborn.”

  “Your head is just as hard,” Martha snapped. “When are you leaving, by the way?”

  “Leaving?” Alexandra asked.

  “If you’re sleeping with Paul, I assume that means you’re together? So wouldn’t you go back to New York now?”

  Paul looked at Alexandra, waiting for her to answer.

  “First of all, Paul and I aren’t sleeping together.”

  Martha smiled. “What are kids calling it these days?”

  Paul laughed.

  Alexandra glared at her aunt. “And I’m not going anywhere. You need help.”

  Martha rolled her eyes. “Dear, I’ll be fine. I can take care of my land.”

  “Your doctor wouldn’t prescribe Vicodin if he thought you were fine.”

  “He didn’t,” she said with a smile. “I showed him a little boob action and he gave me something better.”

  Paul laughed again.

  “Martha, I’m being serious. You can barely get around.”

  She put down her paper. “Don’t stop living your life because of me. I’ll figure something out. You don’t belong here, Alexandra. Please stop letting me hold you back.”

  “You’re family,” Alexandra said. “Family comes first.”

  “Exactly,” she said. “Now go back to New York with Paul. There’s nothing for you here anymore.”

  Alexandra felt her heart fall. “No there isn’t…”

  When they finished their breakfast, Paul helped her clean the dishes.

  “I’m going to take a shower,” he said.

  “Okay.”

  He left the room and disappeared down the hallway.

  Martha looked at her. “I need to talk to you.”

  “I didn’t have sex with him! We just slept together.”

  “Not about that,” Martha said. “It’s about Blaise.”

  “Oh…”

  “Sit down.”

  Alexandra was still for a moment before she took a seat.

  “He called last night.”

  Alexandra kept her mouth shut.

  “He told me everything that happened. He seemed really upset about it, and begged me to help him.”

  “I’m done with him, his lies, his stories, his excuses.”

  Martha drummed the table with her fingertips. “You’re really done with him?”

  “More than done.”

  “So, Paul won?”

  “What?” Alexandra said. “Nobody won. There was no competition.”

  “I guess th
at’s true since Blaise has no idea Paul was here.”

  “It’s none of his business anyway.”

  “Do you still love him?” Martha asked.

  “Let’s not go there.”

  “Answer me,” she said firmly.

  Alexandra sighed. “Would you judge me if I said yes?”

  “I would judge you if you said no.”

  She looked at her aunt. “So you want me to be with Blaise?”

  “No,” she said quickly. “I want you to be with the man you really want. That’s all.”

  “Well, Blaise isn’t that man.”

  “Did you hear about his fields?”

  Alexandra nodded. “He mentioned something about pesticide poisoning.”

  “Apparently, it was too late to save the crop. They’ve had to completely start over, and if it isn’t done right, he won’t produce enough by the harvest season. It could kill his business and his legacy.”

  She gasped. “I had no idea…”

  Martha nodded. “It’s serious.”

  Alexandra was quiet for a moment. “I should help him.”

  Martha smiled. “I knew you would. I can’t go to his aid but I knew I could count on you.”

  “After what he did for you, of course I’ll do it.”

  “No,” she said firmly. “You never do something because you feel obligated to. You do it because you want to. It didn’t work out between you two, but I still love him like my own son.”

  “Even after all the lies he told me?”

  Martha drummed her fingers again. “Blaise isn’t the lying type.”

  “Well, it was pretty clear he was lying.”

  “I still find that hard to believe. I have faith he is a good person. He’s done and said too many amazing things to drag his name through the mud.”

  “You really believe that?” Alexandra asked.

  “Yes,” she said. “But my opinion doesn’t matter. It’s your relationship. Do what you will. But I still love him like my own.”

  Alexandra rose from the table. “I’ll get ready.”

  “That’s my girl.”

  After she changed, she waited for Paul to get out of the shower. He came down the hall with a towel wrapped around his waist.

  “I have to go,” she said quickly. She glanced at his naked chest and saw the water drops. Her thoughts turned sinister for a moment.

  “Where?” He looked at her clothes. “Are you going to the fields?”

  “Yes—Blaise’s fields.”

  He raised an eyebrow. “Why?”

  “It’s a long story, but he needs help. After everything he did for my aunt, I can’t leave him high and dry.”

  “Do you think that’s a good idea?” Paul asked.

  “He can’t hurt me more than he already has.”

  He nodded. “I can help too.”

  “No,” she said quickly. “But thank you.”

  “Okay.” He kissed her on the forehead. “I’ll see you when you get back.”

  “Okay.”

  “And let’s get dinner tonight.”

  She smiled. “Alright.”

  Alexandra got the directions from Martha then drove to his house in the country. When she saw the house, she realized just how loaded he was. It was a two-story house with a beautiful yard. A pasture was just behind it with a few horses. The rest of the land was covered in cotton fields and a few warehouses and barns were off to the side. After she parked, she approached the field.

  People were running around, frantically compacting the soil and adding manure. Mounds of extra dirt was being pushed to the road. A few seed planters were off to the side, ready for planting. She looked around and saw Blaise talking to one of his workers. He was shirtless and wearing a baseball cap. She stared at his body for a moment before she shook the thought away. After adopting a stoic expression, she approached him.

  “How can I help?

  His eyes widened. “Alexandra?”

  “I can start the planting. Those machines look identical to Martha’s.”

  Blaise looked speechless. He stared at her face for a long time, pain and longing both evident on the surface. When he reached for her, she stepped back.

  “Blaise, I’m only here to help. There’s nothing between us, only friendship.”

  His eyes darkened in despair. “Did you think about what I said yesterday?”

  “There’s nothing to think about. Now what would you like me to do?”

  “Alexandra, nothing ever happened with Danielle.”

  She sighed. “If you bring it up again, I’ll leave.”

  He rubbed the back of his neck. “You don’t have to help me,” he said quietly. “But thank you.”

  “I know I don’t.” She stepped away and headed to the machine and got to work. The rows of soil that were ready for planting were injected with the seeds. Everyone worked together so no one was injured. All the workers looked like ants crawling across an anthill.

  Alexandra didn’t look at Blaise while she worked. She pretended he didn’t exist. For all intents and purposes, he didn’t. The sweat dripped down her brow as the heat increased throughout the day. When everyone took a water break, they walked into the open warehouse and drank water and had lunch. She sat in the corner and ate her sandwich alone. Blaise joined her a moment later but he wasn’t eating.

  She didn’t look at him while she ate.

  “Please let me ask you one more thing.”

  Alexandra drank from her water. “What?”

  “Is there anything I can do to prove my honesty? Please name it.”

  She played with the cap of her water bottle. “There only seems to be one witness to the relationship, and that’s Danielle.”

  “So, if she told you everything, you’d believe me?”

  “She would have to be pretty convincing.”

  He nodded. “Okay. I’ll talk to her.”

  “Can we drop this now?”

  Blaise watched her face. “I miss you so much.”

  “Not this either,” she said quickly.

  He sighed then adjusted his hat. “How are you?”

  “Empty,” she said flatly.

  “I’m sorry I hurt you so much. But I swear I’ve been honest the entire time.”

  Alexandra leaned against the wall. “Did you confront your family about the fields?”

  “Not yet. I haven’t had the chance.”

  “That was really low of them.”

  “I know it was,” he said sadly.

  “If your brother was involved, you should cut him off.”

  “Definitely.”

  Alexandra pulled her knees to her chest.

  “Why did you come today?”

  “You needed help.”

  “So?” he said. “If you actually believe that I’m a cheating asshole, why would you help me?”

  She averted her gaze.

  “Alexandra.”

  She hated hearing her name from his lips. She used to love it, but now it just clutched her heart. “I already told you why.”

  “That wasn’t the right answer. Something stronger than obligation brought you here today.”

  “What do you want me to say?” she whispered.

  “You know what I want you to say.”

  “No.”

  “Alexandra.”

  “No,” she repeated.

  “If you still feel that way, you should have faith in me.”

  “I don’t believe in faith,” she snapped. “I believe what I see with my own fucking eyes.”

  “That was just an act.”

  “It looked pretty convincing to me.”

  Blaise clenched his fists. “Do you honestly think you fell in love with someone that twisted and sick?”

  “I have horrible judgment of character.”

  “Or you’re unnaturally good at it,” he snapped. “You never suspected I was doing anything when we were together because there was no reason to. There were no red flags.”

  “I think se
crecy and not knowing where you lived were pretty big.”

  “You wanted to be a secret. I didn’t.”

  “Let’s just drop it,” she said.

  He stared at her, making her feel unnerved by his look. “And what happened yesterday?”

  “You really don’t remember?”

  “Don’t be a smartass,” he said. “You freaked out when I touched you. What was that?”

  “Oh.” She tucked a strand of hair behind her air.

  “Tell me,” he said firmly.

  “It was nothing…”

  He leaned toward her. “I can read you like an open book, Alexandra. I know that wasn’t nothing.”

  “We should get back to work.”

  “The cotton can wait.”

  She shook her head. “Your livelihood can’t.”

  He grabbed her hand. The electricity coursed through her veins. After the way he hurt her, she couldn’t believe he still ignited her in such simple ways. Every touch was as powerful as a sudden shock. “Alexandra, please tell me.”

  She pulled away. “It’s none of your business.”

  “Yes it is my fucking business.” His voice grew louder. “You’re my girlfriend. I take care of you.”

  “I’m not your girlfriend,” she snapped.

  “Yes, you are. I don’t care how many times I have to repeat it.”

  “Blaise, I’m not!”

  He glared at her. “Fine, we’ll do this the hard way.”

  “Coming here was a bad idea.”

  “But you did it anyway,” he said. “And I wonder why.”

  “You’re unbelievable.”

  “Now tell me, Alexandra.”

  “Drop it.”

  “No.” His eyes enlarged. “Did someone hurt you? Just tell me. I’ll fucking kill them.”

  She got to her feet and walked toward the door. “I need to get back to work.”

  He followed her. “I’ll find out anyway. You may as well tell me.”

  Alexandra ignored him.

  “Alexandra, please.”

  “If you want to chase me away, you’re doing a job of it.”

  He sighed. “I just love you, okay? What’s the crime in that?”

  “It ruined my life. That’s what.” She walked away before he could get in another word and returned to work.

  After she worked for a few more hours, she returned the machine to the warehouse and washed her hands in the sink. She was filthy, far dirtier than she ever was on her aunt’s fields.