Striker (Book 1 in the 'Striker' Trilogy)

by Michelle Betham

  ‘But… do you… do you want to? Honestly, Amber. If someone could wave some kind of magic wand to give you the future you really wanted, would you go back to him?’

  She shook her head, hoping he hadn’t noticed the slight hesitation. ‘No. The future I want is with you, Ryan. It’s with you.’

  He smiled, quickly wiping a stray tear away with the back of his hand. ‘Shit, Amber. This is so fucking hard…’

  ‘It doesn’t have to be,’ she whispered, standing on tiptoe to kiss his damp cheek, her lips finally resting on his, his beard tickling her skin, a feeling she’d grown to love. Because it meant it was him kissing her. It was his mouth moving against hers, there was no chance for her to imagine it was anyone else. ‘It really can be very, very easy. Loving someone.’

  He smiled again, pulling her against him, his mouth lowering down onto hers in another long, slow kiss, his fingers running up and down her back. ‘You still up for that dirty sex later, then?’

  ‘Yes,’ she laughed, glad to see the old Ryan back. ‘Now, come on. I could really do with a drink before I force you onto that dance floor to see what you’re really made of.’

  *

  Ryan watched from the bar as Amber and Debbie stayed on the dance floor for yet another song, Amber’s curves sexy and shown off to perfection in the dress she was wearing. Although, Ryan still preferred her naked, lying underneath him, legs open, inviting him in to heaven. Jesus! One second, that’s all it took for the beginnings of an almighty hard-on to start making an appearance. He was beginning to wish they hadn’t come now. The idea of a party had been a good one, at eleven-thirty that morning, but now all he wanted to do was go home, have lots of sex, and try not to think about having to leave Amber again tomorrow. With Saturday’s match only two days away, it meant Friday night was due to be another evening holed up with the lads in the hotel, but if Jim Allen thought that was going to take his mind off anything other than football, he was wrong. Amber was all Ryan could think about now. She was all he wanted to think about. And nothing he could do, nothing anyone could do could stop her from being the number one thing on his mind.

  ‘So, it’s serious, then?’ Gary asked, handing Ryan another shot.

  ‘Yeah,’ Ryan sighed, knocking the shot back in one. ‘It certainly looks that way.’

  Gary followed Ryan’s gaze as it fell back on Amber. She was dancing sexily to a dance track Ryan loved but couldn’t remember the name of, her arms up above her head as she moved her hips in time to the thumping beat, throwing her head back and laughing as Debbie shouted something in her ear.

  ‘She’s probably telling her I’ve got a dick the size of a cocktail sausage, or something just as derogatory,’ Gary said, leaning back against the bar and folding his arms.

  Ryan looked at him, smirking slightly. ‘Yeah, well, that’s not a complete lie, is it, mate?’

  ‘Says Mr. Hung-Like-A-Donkey.’

  Ryan shrugged, turning his attention back to Amber. ‘I’ve had no complaints. And I know I make that beautiful woman I get to sleep with every night scream out loud when I’m in there.’

  Gary pulled a face, turning round to order another set of shots. ‘I needed to hear that, didn’t I?’

  ‘And I want to be in there, right now. She is making me as horny as hell tonight.’

  Gary downed another Jagerbomb. ‘Well, I can’t deny I’m still pissed off that I never had a chance to sample the delights of Ms. Amber Sullivan. She wouldn’t go near any of us before you turned up, so what’ve you got that’s so frigging different?’

  Ryan grinned, sticking his hands in the pockets of his jeans. ‘No idea, mate. But, whatever it is, she fucking loves it!’

  ‘You fucking love yourself, you mean.’ He looked at Ryan, his expression changing slightly. ‘And what about her and the boss?’

  ‘What about them?’ Ryan asked sharply. ‘It’s over, Gary. And I’d really appreciate it if you didn’t keep bringing it up, alright? It’s over. And you’ve got to try and forget all about that because…’

  ‘Okay, okay. I get it. I’ll keep me mouth shut, don’t worry.’

  Ryan just looked at him, but said nothing.

  ‘Want another drink?’

  ‘Nah,’ Ryan sighed. ‘I’m trying to cut back, aren’t I? Trying to slow down.’

  ‘Whatever. I’m off to see if Rob’s ever gonna stick his hand in his frigging pocket tonight. Just because it’s his birthday doesn’t mean to say he can avoid getting a round in.’

  Ryan watched Gary walk away, shaking his head as he turned back around to watch Amber. Jesus, she could move! He closed his eyes for a second, imagining her writhing around a metal pole wearing nothing but killer heels, until his dream was interrupted by someone sidling up beside him, an arm linking through his making him open his eyes.

  ‘Hello, Ryan. Looking gorgeous, as usual.’

  ‘Geena, Jesus, I didn’t know you were coming tonight.’

  ‘Well, I was hoping I would be. Later. If you’re up for it. And if you make it as good as last time I’ll have no need for the gym tomorrow, not after Ryan Fisher’s given me a personal workout.’

  Ryan looked at the young, blonde girl in front of him, knowing he’d met her before, but he couldn’t quite remember where. He was surprised he’d even remembered her name, and he’d quite obviously slept with her, but he really wanted her to let go of him and leave. Right now. He felt nothing as he looked at her, except this fear that Amber would see her clinging onto him like a demented limpet and jump to every wrong conclusion there could be. This, what was happening here, this was his past. And he was trying very hard to leave all that behind.

  ‘Look, Geena, can you… can you let go of me? Please?’

  She looked at him, pouting like a child who’d had her favourite toy taken away. ‘Ryan! What is wrong with you? Don’t you want to play out tonight? I’ve even brought a friend with me, and she’s dying to meet you.’

  Ryan looked over at the dance floor again but, thankfully, Amber was still engrossed in the dancing, sharing another joke with Debbie. ‘Things have changed, Geena.’

  ‘What? You mean, you don’t want to have sex with me anymore?’

  He looked at her. What had he ever seen in this empty-headed, vacuous girl? Apart from a night of whatever he wanted, whichever way he wanted it, because he was sure she’d given him anything he’d asked for. At some point in the past. ‘I’m with someone now,’ Ryan said slowly, just incase she had trouble understanding what he was telling her.

  ‘So?’ she replied, examining her nails, the pout still present.

  ‘So, Jesus… so, no, I don’t want to have sex with you.’

  She looked at him, resting a hand on his shoulder as she moved her mouth close to his ear. ‘Not even if my friend joins in, too? Come on. Don’t say you’re not turned-on by the thought of me and my gorgeous girlfriend, both of us naked, both of us willing to give you absolutely anything you want. Absolutely anything, Ryan.’

  He gently pushed her away, trying not to let the idea of her and whoever this friend of hers happened to be get under his skin. He’d probably indulged in the odd threesome in his time, he couldn’t really remember. A lot of those nights had been nothing but a blur, but the idea of one now wasn’t one he wanted to dwell on. Not at the risk of losing Amber. ‘Go find someone else’s head to fuck with,’ he said, turning away from her, aware only of a huffy sigh coming from her direction before she finally got the message and walked away. ‘Christ!’ he sighed, leaning back against the bar, closing his eyes for a second, rubbing the bridge of his nose with his thumb and forefinger.

  ‘Christ, what?’ Amber asked, slipping her arms around his waist, quickly kissing his mouth.

  He looked at her, smiling, a feeling of relief sweeping over him. ‘Do you wanna get out of here?’

  She smiled back, letting her hand slide up the back of his t-shirt as his mouth lowered onto hers for a slow, deep kiss. ‘Yeah. I wanna get out of here.’

  �
��Good,’ he whispered, his mouth still resting on hers. ‘Because I’m really not in the party mood anymore.’

  She reached up to gently stroke his face, his chin rough beneath her fingers. ‘What about our own private party, huh? You still in the mood for that?’

  ‘Would that be the one with lots of dirty sex followed by very little sleep?’

  ‘Yeah,’ she breathed, letting his mouth close in on hers again, her stomach turning over and over in a zillion tiny somersaults. ‘That’s the one.’

  He could feel himself reacting to her, the feel of her body pressed close against his, her fingers gently stroking the base of his spine, her breath warm on his skin. He was hard and ready, desperate to get back home and make love to her. If they made it that far.

  ‘You ever fucked in the back of a taxi?’ he smirked, running his fingers over her bare shoulders, down her neck, trailing lightly across her cleavage.

  ‘No,’ she laughed, throwing her head back as his lips brushed the base of her neck.

  ‘Wanna give it a try?’

  Chapter Twenty-Two

  ‘Do you want to tell me what you meant the other day?’ Amber asked, stopping Ronnie on his way into Tynebridge. She leaned back against the wall outside the main entrance where she’d been grabbing a bit of air before the match kicked-off, keeping her eyes on Ronnie as she spoke.

  He stared back at her. ‘What I meant?’

  ‘Oh, don’t pretend you can’t remember what you said, Ronnie, come on. You said that what happened with you and Anna, it was my fault…’

  ‘I didn’t say that.’

  ‘You alluded to it.’

  ‘I didn’t mean it.’

  ‘Didn’t you?’ Amber asked, following him as he walked into the main entrance, striding purposefully across the marble floor of the huge reception area which was now full of footballers, pundits, and a number of local celebrities who’d turned up to watch the game, not to mention members of the Red Star board. And Jim Allen. And it was his presence which caused Amber to momentarily lose track of what she was actually in the middle of saying.

  ‘Didn’t I, what?’

  ‘Come on, Ronnie, I don’t have time for this… When I said what happened with you and Anna – when I said it wasn’t my fault you looked at me and you said “wasn’t it?” What am I supposed to think, huh? When someone says that? And then decides they’re not going to answer my calls when I try to get hold of them. What’s going on?’

  ‘Nothing.’

  She couldn’t help laughing. ‘Jesus, that’s usually my line. Have we had some kind of role reversal go on when I wasn’t looking?’

  Ronnie stopped walking and turned to face her. ‘Nothing’s going on, Amber. Alright?’

  ‘Actually, no. It’s not alright. You can’t go blaming somebody for something then refuse to tell them why.’

  He threw his head back and sighed, pushing a hand through his hair. ‘I’m sorry.’ He looked at her. ‘I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to say what I did; it was just emotions taking over, that’s all. It meant nothing. Okay?’

  She narrowed her eyes slightly as she looked at him, not entirely convinced. His body language was a little strange, too. Like he was trying to hide something. ‘Yeah. Okay.’

  He leaned forward to plant a kiss on her cheek. ‘I’ve got to get to work. I’ll see you later.’

  She watched as he walked over to the two ex-footballers who’d be joining him on the pundit panel during the televised match that afternoon, his expression changing, his body language automatically becoming more relaxed. So, there was nothing going on? Yeah, right. She believed that.

  ‘Good to see you here, Amber.’

  She turned to see Jim standing beside her, handsome as ever in his trademark match-day dark suit and white shirt, aviator shades tucked firmly in the top pocket of his jacket.

  ‘You knew I’d be here. I’m working.’

  He looked away for a second, smiling at the Chairman and two of the owners of Newcastle Red Star as they walked through the main entrance on their way to what Amber assumed would be one of the better-equipped hospitality boxes. There was always an element of corporate entertaining going on at big home games. And this was a big home game, for Ryan, anyway, because Red Star were playing his old London club that afternoon. And Amber knew how much it meant to Ryan to play the game of his life out there. To prove to himself, more than anyone, that he’d made the right decision to move back up north.

  ‘It’s just good to see you, that’s all,’ Jim went on, his eyes looking right into hers. And as much as she wanted to say something back, to tell him that she wished she could say the same but it wouldn’t be true, no words would come out. She just stared at him, wishing he’d never come back here. Wishing he’d kept that promise to stay away, to respect what she needed him to do because him being around was only complicating everything. Even now. Even though she knew she wanted to be with Ryan; even though she knew she loved Ryan, Jim was still here, still a big part of her life. And there wasn’t really anything she could do to change that.

  ‘I’ve got to go,’ Amber whispered, finally breaking the stare, hating the way she felt flustered. She’d never been flustered before he’d walked back into her life.

  ‘Your dad’s invited me round to his for lunch tomorrow,’ Jim carried on, making Amber look up sharply. ‘I gather you and Ryan will be there, too. I guess he wants us all to have a big family dinner, huh?’

  Amber took a silent deep breath. ‘You’re not family, though. Are you?’

  ‘As good as, honey.’

  She continued to stare at him. ‘Are you going to make this difficult for me and Ryan? Because that really isn’t fair, Jim.’

  ‘I love you, Amber. Yet you’re with him. That’s not fair.’

  She wanted to say something, to make him understand that things could never be the way he wanted them to be but he’d walked off before she’d had a chance to even open her mouth. Great. Lunch tomorrow was going to be fun, and she really didn’t need the stress of having Jim there. It was a difficult enough job trying to get her father onside as far as Ryan was concerned without the added pressure of Jim. It was a situation fraught with tension, with three out of four people knowing a secret the other really couldn’t find out about. Just one tiny thing had the potential to light a touch-paper that could really make things difficult, and Amber didn’t want to think about the consequences that could arise from that. Maybe she was worrying unnecessarily, or maybe she really did have cause for concern. Who knew? She’d just have to wait and see, wouldn’t she?

  ‘Did Jim tell you he’s joining us for lunch tomorrow?’ Freddie Sullivan smiled as he arrived at his daughter’s side. ‘I saw you talking to him just then.’

  She looked at her father, trying to return the smile he was giving her. ‘Erm, yeah. Yeah, he did.’

  ‘Are you two getting on alright?’ Freddie frowned, shoving his hands in his pockets.

  ‘Why… why wouldn’t we be?’ Amber asked, quickly checking her phone, noticing a new text from Ryan had arrived.

  ‘I dunno, pet,’ Freddie shrugged. ‘He says he hasn’t seen an awful lot of you since he came back up here, that’s all. He feels like you’re almost avoiding him.’

  Jim Allen had seen more of her than most people so he was lying there, but she couldn’t really tell her dad that, could she? Sliding her phone back into her pocket she looked at her father again. ‘Why would he see a lot of me anyway, Dad? And I’m not avoiding him, why the hell would I avoid him?’

  Freddie shrugged again. ‘I have no idea, Amber. You tell me.’

  ‘I’m not avoiding him. I’m just busy, that’s all. And I’m sure he’s got much better things to do than talk to me. We were never that close anyway, were we? Not really. He’s more your friend than mine.’

  Freddie fell into step beside Amber as she pushed open the double doors that led out of the main atrium and down to the Press and Players Lounges. ‘You were only young back then, I suppose. You
had your own life… Listen, sweetheart, you don’t mind me inviting him tomorrow, do you? Only, he is one of my oldest friends, and for some strange reason he’s still without a girlfriend since he arrived back up north, which surprises me, considering what a handsome bastard he is. Had the women falling at his feet when he was a player here…’

  Amber looked at her dad, not really in the mood to discuss Jim Allen’s playboy past – a past that involved her far more than it should have done. ‘Look, I’ve got to go and… y’know, catch up with some people in the Press Lounge, make sure I’m all ready for the match.’

  ‘Of course. You go ahead, sweetheart. I’ll pop into the Players Lounge for a bit. There’re bound to be some old faces in there I haven’t seen in a while.’ He kissed her quickly on the cheek. ‘I’ll see you after the game?’

  She nodded, smiling what she hoped was a more convincing smile. ‘Yeah.’

  She watched him walk into the Players Lounge, and she was just about to push open the door to the Press Lounge directly opposite when someone grabbed her arm and pulled her round the corner.

  ‘What the…? Ryan! What the hell are you doing? You’re supposed to be in the dressing room, they’re gonna kill you…’

  He shut her up with a kiss and she just melted against him, leaning back against the wall as his hands rested on her hips, his mouth soft yet strong as it moved against hers. She hadn’t seen him since yesterday morning, hadn’t spoken to him for all those hours and this was something she’d missed. The kisses. She missed them when he wasn’t around.

  ‘You have got to get back to the dressing room, Ryan.’