by B. B. Hamel
Ahead, I saw the motel looming up through the trees. I started walking up the long driveway, heading toward the parking lot. I couldn’t wait to get back to the room just so that I could devour my food. I felt so silly for being so hungry and leaving the room when it was probably pretty dangerous, but I couldn’t help myself.
Just then, that black SUV came back. At least it looked like the same one. I couldn’t be sure, but it drove past me again, going slowly.
I got a really bad feeling. I started walking quickly back to my room, nearly jogging. My heart started beating fast in my chest, and I realized that I was being more than just silly.
I was being straight up stupid.
I should never have left my room. I should have stayed hidden there until Gage got back. This was such a stupid risk and all for a cheeseburger. I just wasn’t used to living my life like the mafia was trying to kill me, which they absolutely were trying to do.
I got into the parking lot and started running toward the stairs. Suddenly the SUV appeared again, roaring up the driveway.
Panic set in. The vehicle tore up toward me, slamming on the brakes and turning sideways just as I got to the staircase. Two men jumped out, both of them large. I didn’t recognize either one of them, but they both came after me.
I took the stairs two at a time, running as fast as I could. The one man pulled his gun out.
“Boss wants her alive!” the other man yelled, running after me.
I moved down the walkway and got to our door. I fumbled with the key, got the door unlocked, and ducked inside. I slammed it shut and locked the door.
I heard the feet slamming on the walkway. I threw my bag of food down on the bed and drew the gun out from my jean shorts, holding it the way Gage showed me. I heard the men outside of the door talking in whispers.
Suddenly, they slammed against the wood. It buckled but didn’t break. Someone grunted and did it again, another heaving smash. Wood cracked, but didn’t break. Again and again they smashed into the door. Every person in the motel probably heard it, and I hoped that someone would call for help.
I was going to pull the trigger. I had to pull the trigger. Maybe I could shoot through the door, but I wasn’t sure, and I didn’t know how to reload it. I had to wait until they were through. I thought about backing up more, but I wasn’t a good shot. I needed to be close in order to hit him.
I was going to shoot a man. I might even kill him. The thought kept running through my mind as he smashed into the door again and again.
It was coming. The man was coming. He wasn’t going to take me this time, he wasn’t going to have me.
Suddenly, the smashing stopped. I heard someone speak, and then grunt. There was the sound of a struggle and then a strangled yell. A gun went off and then there was another yell followed by silence.
I stood there, heart pounding, for a few seconds before I heard him.
“It’s me. Open the door.”
It was Gage. Relief flooded through me. I went to the door and threw it open.
“Are you okay?”
I threw my arms around him, pulling him close against me. He gently took the gun from my hand before pulling me tightly against his chest.
I breathed deep, choking back the tears.
I was ready to kill someone. I’d never been at that place before, except maybe when Gage came home the day after my near-rape. But this was different, I wasn’t just reacting out of fear. I was thinking consciously that I was ready to kill someone, to shoot him dead if he came into the room. I was prepared to do it, and that terrified me.
What kind of person was I becoming?
“It’s okay,” Gage said. “You’re okay.”
“What happened?”
“I threw them off the balcony.”
I blinked then pulled away. There was some blood on the railing. I looked over and saw their bodies down on the ground.
I quickly looked away.
“Come on,” he said. “We have to go. Even a place like this will call the cops when there are gunshots.”
“Okay,” I said, the numbness setting in.
He gave me a look and I hurried. I threw my stuff together, gathered all my things, and then we headed back out. We got into his car and pulled out, driving fast. We never heard the sirens, but I was sure the cops showed up, which meant the mafia would know what had happened.
“How did they find you?” he asked me finally after ten minutes of driving in silence.
“I left the room.”
He glared at me. “You did what?”
“I left the room. I went to the diner to get some lunch.”
“Jesus fuck, Sadie.”
“I know. I know. It was so stupid.”
“You nearly got killed. You realize that? They nearly got you. If I hadn’t shown up when I did.”
“I know, okay? I know. It was so stupid.”
“This isn’t a game anymore. They’re not messing around. They want you and they want you bad.”
“Why? What do they want from me? I’m not prosecuting anything anymore. I thought that was what they wanted.”
“Vadik said you’ve been digging, that you found something big. Whatever you have in those files, they want.”
“Shit,” I said softly. “Rick. My old boss. He must have told them what I was up to.”
“Probably.” He shook his head. “Fuck. They offered me half a million dollars for you.”
I paused, blinking. That was a lot of money.
He smirked at me. “You’re worth a lot more than that, so don’t worry.”
I nodded, feeling oddly relieved. I knew he wouldn’t sell me to them, but still, part of me couldn’t help but worry.
“Where are we going to go now?” I asked him.
“We need to think of a plan. There are plenty of other shitty motels around that we can stop at. We’ll figure it out.”
I nodded, leaning back in my chair.
Of course, it was my stupid curiosity that got me in trouble. Of course, it was my own damn fault for digging too deeply, for getting too obsessed. I couldn’t just let it go and prosecute the guy I had in front of me, I had to be stupid and go after the whole damn mob. Rick was probably on their payroll and sold me out the second he could.
That bastard. He probably knew he was getting me killed, but he didn’t care so long as it protected his own ass and kept the payments coming. I was a pawn the whole time, and there was nothing I could do about it.
Except the feds were still interested in the Petrov family, and I did have a lot of proof that showed something shady was going down in the city. Maybe that was the key to all of this.
I didn’t really know. All I knew was that I had to follow Gage’s orders from now on. I couldn’t go off on my own or make stupid moves like I already did. He was clearly pissed off at me, and I deserved it. I dragged him into this and I was the one that kept fucking things up for him, making things worse.
I almost wished he’d take the half a million dollars and leave me. At least then I could feel okay about one good thing coming from all this.
Either way, I was going to have to live with my stupid mistakes, and try not to let them drag Gage down any further than they already had.
18
Gage
We drove fast away from the motel, putting as much distance between us and those dead assholes as possible. I hadn’t recognized them, but I knew the kind of guys they were: young and desperate to get on Vadik’s good side.
I couldn’t believe they found us out there. According to Sadie’s story, she left the room to walk to the diner, and that was when the car passed her. It must have been freak luck, or maybe Vadik had hundreds of cars out on the roads just like that one looking for us. Either way, I was angry with Sadie and myself for being so sloppy.
I shouldn’t have left her alone. She wasn’t used to this kind of thing and couldn’t really understand how important it was that she stay hidden away in the motel room for the time being. I
was annoyed that she didn’t think and left anyway, but it was probably more my own fault than hers. She was just a civilian trying to survive this fucking ordeal, and I needed to be better about protecting her.
It was a close fucking call. I got back just in time to kill those two bastards before they could get inside and get their hands on her. I didn’t like that I had to kill two guys like that, especially two more mafia guys that were just doing their jobs, but it didn’t matter anymore. I was way too far gone for any of that.
There was no chance that I’d take Vadik’s proposal. I wasn’t going to sell her out for any amount of money no matter what Vadik said or did. Not after everything we’d shared together so far. I never really thought I’d feel this way about a woman ever again, and yet I couldn’t help myself. I was willing to go further than I ever thought possible for her and then some.
We had to find a new place to lay low. Other men might have gotten in their car and driven as far as possible away from Ashertown, but I wasn’t that kind of person. We had unfinished business, and the mob had taken this to the extreme. I wasn’t going to run away without at least knowing that they were hurting because of what I did to them.
“Where are we going?” Sadie asked me after an hour of driving.
“Right now, nowhere.”
“We’re just driving in circles?”
“More or less. I’m making sure we’re not being followed.”
She nodded. “Is that how you think they found us?”
“No. I think they just got lucky.”
She went quiet for a second. “I’m sorry, Gage.”
“It’s okay.”
“Really. I shouldn’t have left the room.”
“You shouldn’t have, but it doesn’t matter now. You’re safe.”
“Where will we go?”
“There are plenty of ratholes around Ashertown. We’ll pick one.”
“But what then?”
I shook my head. “I’m not thinking that far right now. We need to get to safety, and then we can worry about it.”
She was quiet for a few minutes as I continued driving. I didn’t know what was going through her head, but I could see that she was nervous and angry.
She had every right to be. One day she was doing her job, and the next the mob was trying to kill her. She wasn’t equipped to handle this sort of fucking shit. Without me, she’d be dead in a ditch somewhere, and Vadik would continue rolling over Ashertown.
I wondered briefly what I would be doing if the ADA had been anyone else. Truth was, if it weren’t Sadie I probably would have killed her myself and moved on with my life. I would have continued to support Vadik, continued to move through the ranks of the mafia. Now, though, that seemed so absurd and stupid. I didn’t know what the fuck I was thinking keeping myself allied with people that asked me to kill and maim for them without giving me enough in return. I had a decent life, but they were willing to turn on me in a second if I disagreed with their plans.
They asked everything of me, all of my loyalty, but didn’t give nearly enough in return.
“I have an idea,” Sadie said suddenly.
“What is it?”
“I know some people,” she said slowly. “Back in Seattle. Journalists and bloggers and people in law enforcement. Maybe they can help us.”
I frowned. “They’re too far away.”
“Maybe. But they can get us in touch with someone closer.”
“No. We can’t trust anyone around here.”
“But what about my research?” she asked. “I found something that Vadik is willing to pay a lot of money for. That means we have leverage.”
I nodded. “I thought of that too.”
“We can figure out whatever that is and use it against them.”
“That’s what I want to do, too. But I don’t trust anyone on your side of the law.”
“My side of the law is the law.”
I smirked at her. “No, your side of the law pretends it runs things while my side of the law bribes and kills and murders.”
“What do you suggest?”
“I don’t know right now,” I said. “Do you have all of your papers?”
“No,” she said. “I have a lot of it on my laptop, and some important files, but not all of it.”
“We need all of it.”
“Some is at the office. Some is in my apartment.”
“Shit,” I said. “Those are basically the two places we can never go back to.”
“But the key might be there.”
“Or a bunch of dangerous men with guns.”
“I think we have to take the chance.”
“No. Not yet.”
“Gage.”
“No,” I said more firmly. “We’re not going, not yet. The Petrov family has enemies, some of them pretty strong. We have other options.”
“I know this is the best one. This is what they really want. If we can somehow trade it for our freedom, we might be able to go back to living normal lives.”
I looked at her for a second and it suddenly dawned on me.
She thought that this was going to end and that she’d have a normal life again.
I sighed, shaking my head. I didn’t want to tell her this, but I had to say it. I had to say it her for own damn sake.
“That’s never going to happen,” I said simply.
“It won’t be easy, but we can make it work.”
“No,” I said more forcefully. “Listen to me, Sadie. We’ll never have a normal life again, not in Ashertown, and probably not anywhere near here.”
She was quiet for a second then nodded. “Yeah, I know.”
“No, you don’t. When this is over, you won’t be able to practice law. Maybe you can go back to Seattle, but you should probably change your name and distance yourself from your old life as much as possible.”
“Why?” she asked.
“Because we will always be in danger, even if they let us go.”
“Then what’s the point of all this? We might as well turn ourselves in.”
“We’re not finished,” I said. “We’ll be able to have lives, just not the one that you’ve known. Things will be different.”
She went quiet for a while as I continued to drive. I didn’t know how she was feeling about this, but I didn’t want to push her too far. I just dropped a huge bomb on her and she was probably only now coming to grips with what her future looked like.
Maybe I was being too hard on her. Maybe she had already thought of all this stuff. She was stronger than I realized, much stronger, and I was constantly surprised by her resilience. That she was still going after everything that had happened was basically a fucking miracle.
No matter what, we were doing this thing together. I wasn’t backing down and I wasn’t going to let her falter. We were going to find a way to stand up to Vadik and his fucking assholes one way or another, and ultimately we were going to win. I had to believe that, otherwise this was all for nothing.
I continued driving, my mind trying to wrap itself around the hundreds of problems laying ahead of us. As I made a right and started heading west, I noticed a car still trailing behind us.
I made a few more abrupt turns, and it didn’t take long before I realized that we were being followed. I could barely believe it, since we’d been driving around for a couple hours already, but there they were. I couldn’t make out who was in the car, but I had to assume they were mafia.
“Hold on,” I said to Sadie.
“What? Why—“
She was cut off as I jammed on the brakes. We jolted forward and the cars behind me had to brake hard to stop. I waited a second as the light in front of me turned yellow, and then I slammed on the gas. We sped through the light, leaving the other cars honking their horns behind us.
I watched in the rearview mirror as the car that was following us pulled out of the line and sped up. It flew through the red light as I hit the gas harder, nailing a rough left turn across traffic, flying
down back streets.
“What’s happening?” Sadie asked.
“We’re being chased,” I said.
“By who?”
“Mafia, I’d guess. But I can’t tell.”
I hit a hard right, tires screeching on the pavement. I was weaving freely through traffic, praying that a cop didn’t see this little chase going down. If we got picked up, we were fucked.
I needed to end it fast. Otherwise, they were going to win one way or another.
19
Sadie
I held on tight to the dashboard as Gage sped us through the tight Ashertown streets. We went from staying on the outskirts to driving down through town, running red lights and passing cars as fast as possible.
I couldn’t get a good look at the car chasing after us. It was an old sedan, the big boxy metal sort of thing, in a skin-color beige color with a brown vinyl top. It was an ugly thing and it gave me the creeps as it doggedly followed us, not giving us a single inch to breathe.
Gage drove expertly. We moved through the town and headed back south, weaving out toward the farmlands.
“We’re going to lose them on the back roads,” he said.
“Are you sure?”
“I’m positive.” He grinned, wild and manic. “Trust me.”
The car lurched and spun as he hit a hard turn. We flew off the main road and hit a gravel path. I’d been down this way before, and I knew that it split off at the very end, one path a dead end and the other a cut-through past the soybean farms.
I looked back but couldn’t see behind us. There was a thick cloud of dust and gravel kicking up as Gage kept the car moving fast, way too fast for the small gravel road.
Ahead, I caught sight of the split in the path. Gage veered right, heading toward the cut-through, but at the last second he slammed on the brakes and pulled off the path, into the woods.
“What are you doing?” I asked him.
“Just wait.”
We couldn’t see the spot where the path split, but we could hear the car coming up the gravel road toward it. I listened as it slowed down, its engine rumbling, waiting for something.