The Chariots Slave

by Lynn, R.

  Thaddius studied Vettius as he spoke. The man was right. He must take his efforts from worry and put them into action. He smiled at Vettius, thanking him with his eyes for settling his spirit.

  Despite how horribly Thaddius acted, Vettius had always been kind. And it was times like these that Thaddius realized what a gift a man like him was.

  “What is Sellah doing?” Vettius asked when he noticed her struggling to drag a sack of grain. “That must weigh more than she does!”

  Thaddius followed Vettius’s gaze to see Sellah using her whole body trying to pull one simple sack. It was a humorous sight to behold as girl wrestled with bag. “She is moving our supplies into the stables.”

  “Thaddius, you must realize that this is an impossible task

  for her. She is not fully recovered from her beating.”

  Vettius’s concern-filled eyes never left Sellah.

  It seemed as though he couldn’t even take two breaths

  before Vettius turned from aiding him to doubting him. And

  it was always around the girl, his son’s girl.

  “She does as I instructed. Either you stand back and watch

  her struggle or you aid her. Those are your options,” he said

  as he kicked at the leather strap on the ground, trying to avoid

  Vettius’s disappointed gaze.

  The sound of soft footsteps on the dirt caused Thaddius to

  look up. Vettius had left him and was headed toward Sellah.

  Of course he chose to aid the girl. He turned awkwardly to

  his new driver who stood left alone before him.

  The man did not look like much, but he was all Thaddius

  had. “Come let us pick out a lead horse and a cart for you.

  We have much work ahead of us.” Thaddius let out a sigh as

  he walked toward the stables.

  He did not turn to see if the man followed, his attention

  was elsewhere. It was focused on Vettius and Sellah

  struggling together with one sack.

  T he sun had long since set, and with its absence a bitingly cold evening breeze seeped into the stables. No blanket had been delivered to her, so she huddled into the corner with a horse cover draped around her shoulders.

  The door opened, bringing with it another dose of the cold wind. Soft footsteps pressed upon the hay floor as a small form made its way toward her.

  “Sellah?” Accalia called out as she searched the moonlit stables for her friend.

  “I’m over here!”

  “Oh Sellah, Vettius told me you have been instructed to stay here. I was worried when you did not come to the women’s quarters last night — and then I didn’t see you all day. I thought that Thaddius might have…. Well, I can’t believe this, Sellah, I just can’t.” Accalia sat on the bale of hay next to Sellah and wrapped a blanket around her shoulders.

  “Has he given you any food or water?”

  “I had some bread sent to me this evening,” Sellah smiled,

  hoping to calm Accalia and keep her from worrying. “Some bread? That won’t do. You need to keep up your

  strength. Here eat this,” Accalia said as she reached into her

  cloak and pulled out a wrapped package. Sellah eyed the

  bundle before opening it to reveal a large piece of salted

  meat.

  “Where did you get this?” Sellah asked as she greedily

  started into the tender flesh.

  “It was left over from Thaddius’s table… I didn’t want it

  to go to waste.” She saw Sellah’s eyes widen.

  The door to the stables opened again and a dark figure

  illuminated by a small lamp, slipped in. “You do not have

  light?” The warm, fatherly voice of Vettius greeted the girls. “Unfortunately the stables do not offer such privileges,”

  Sellah joked.

  “Then it is a good thing I brought you candles!” Sellah shifted in her seat, reaching up to grab the candles

  from Vettius’s outstretched arm. A stabbing pain up her side

  reminded her that her muscles were sore from the strenuous

  work of the day. She had barely managed to move five sacks,

  and still another twenty or so awaited her tomorrow.

  Brushing aside the aches she smiled while she lit a candle on

  the flame of his oil lamp.

  “Oh Sellah, I just hate seeing you like this,” Accalia said

  as they watched Vettius fashion a seat for himself on one of

  the grain sacks.

  “It is not so bad. The horses can be good company.” The

  light of the candle reflected off her face, causing the crease of

  her brow to darken in the shadows.

  Accalia’s worried eyes searched Sellah’s, and she

  motioned to Vettius as if to ask him to do something. “I will go to Thaddius tomorrow and request him to let you stay in the women’s quarters,” Vettius offered as he nodded his head at Accalia in understanding.

  Sellah lifted her chin to look at her friend. “It is really all right. There is a certain freedom to being with the horses.” She tried her best to sound convincing.

  “Nevertheless, I will ask,” Vettius pressed.

  Sellah smiled as she stood and made her way over to Diana. The horse had begun stomping her foot and shaking

  her mane. And it seemed as though she were trying to talk by the way she chattered her teeth and released a deep throated whine.

  “What is it Diana, why are you interrupting us?” Sellah calmly talked to the mare while rubbing her neck.

  Vettius studied Sellah as he watched the exchange.

  “Does she always act so?”

  “I think she is convinced she is not a horse,” Sellah laughed as she opened the stable door and led Diana over to the group. The horse offered no resistance when she pulled on the lead, pressing her to lay down.

  * Vettius was plainly surprised at how Diana rested so willingly beside Sellah. “She must trust you.”

  Sellah ran her hand over the coarse hair on Diana’s snout as she thought over Vettius’s unexpected comment. “Why do you say that?”

  “It is rare for a horse to lay down, especially that horse. She is usually anxious around people.” When he finished

  speaking, he saw that both girls had looks of confusion on their faces. “Horses normally stand, as it allows for a quick escape if a predator comes around.”

  “I did not know that,” Accalia said. “Vettius, how is Simeon faring?” she asked when the thought of him distracted her from the topic of horses.

  Sweat beads began to form on his forehead. He quickly wiped them away before either of the girls could see. It was a chilly night, and the sweat was about to give away his lie. “He is fine, almost recovered.” His eyes danced over Sellah’s face, trying to read her reaction.

  * Sellah offered Vettius a half smile before poking at the soft wax of the candle. Simeon was recovering. He had maybe another few days before he could leave the care of the medicos and go back to work. But there was something in the way Vettius’s jaw clenched that made Sellah nervous.

  “You know, don’t you?” she asked as she boldly raised her eyes to challenge him.

  “Know what?” Accalia looked between the pair who stared at each other as if having a conversation in their minds. There was an awkward silence before Vettius stood.

  “Come Accalia, we must allow Sellah to find some sleep. She has a lot of work to do tomorrow, and my son has requested that she take her afternoon break with him in the tent.”

  Accalia arched her eyebrows as she looked at Sellah. “All right, goodnight Sellah.”

  With a quick tilt of her head, Sellah acknowledged

  Accalia’s farewell. She thought over Vettius’s words and Simeon’s request. Could she see him? Was she ready? The answer was obvious by the reaction of her body. Tight stomach, tension in her shoulders, not to mention
difficulty calming her breath.

  “Vettius wait,” she called after him. “I cannot see Simeon tomorrow. I have too much work to attend to and will not be permitted an afternoon break.” It was a half lie, she did have a lot of work. But she knew it was a choice to avoid Simeon not a result of her workload.

  Vettius slumped forward at her words, and he slowly shook his head as he left the stables.

  Accalia turned to Sellah and offered one more awkward good-bye. Sellah knew her friend had no idea what had just exchanged between the two of them and felt very much left out. She hated not telling Accalia. She hated not telling anyone. Avoiding Simeon would not be an option for long. Soon she would have to face him and talk about the very thing she had forced deep within… her feelings.

  “A pologies, Dominus, but we have a problem at the gate.”

  The guard panted as he rested his hands on his knees and tried to regain his breath. He looked up to Thaddius who motioned with his hand for him to go on. “It is the girls. They grow restless waiting and have started throwing burning objects into the villa. They are working together and will have the gate breeched in no time!”

  “I don’t understand, they were quiet earlier today.” Thaddius rubbed his jaw as he thought over the consequences that the women breaking in would cause.

  “Yes, but when the girls from last night did not leave and the next on the list had not been requested, they became agitated. They wonder if you will keep your promise to entertain them all.”

  Thaddius paced back and forth as exasperation over yet another problem challenged his reserve. “Can a man not keep the same women for two nights if it pleases him to do so? I do not have time for this. It is your job to keep this domus secure, so leave me to my work and return to yours!”

  The guard was hesitant in continuing, but the pressing matters at the gate gave him courage to defy Thaddius and to speak. “I understand my Lord, but I fear if you do not come soon, they will overthrow the gate and then you will be forced to make time. We cannot hold them off much longer.”

  “Go back to the men, and I will come to you when I can.” Thaddius dismissed him with a flick of the wrist.

  If the guard spoke again, he was not aware. His whole being was focused on his exhaustion and the overwhelming anxiety of the looming tournament.

  In an effort to ignore his emotions, Thaddius made his way to his quarters. When he opened the door he saw that Calista and Guya upon the setee, talking. He offered them a brief smile before collapsing onto his bed.

  “Thaddius, let us pick up where we left off last night. I have been eagerly awaiting my chance to please you,” Calista purred as she crossed the room to his side. “Guya, remove Thaddius’s sandals and rub his feet. He has worked hard today.”

  * “Thaddius, I must speak with you,” Vettius yelled through the door.

  “Not now, I have company!”

  Thaddius’s childish manners were frustrating Vettius more than they usually did. He had little to no patience left tonight. “I do not care who you have in there, you must listen to what I have to say!”

  There was a shuffle of fabrics and a loud thud followed by the slapping of Thaddius’s feet upon the floor. The door

  whipped open and pushed stale air into Vettius’s face. The anger-hardened face of a little boy, disguised as a man, looked back at him.

  “How dare you address me so…”

  “I have had enough of your attitude,” Vettius interrupted. Blank eyes and an open mouth stood frozen, as if to dare Vettius to continue. “The boy I saw grow into a man, beside my own child, is not the man I see standing before me now! You act as though you are twelve in years not twenty three.”

  He could hear Thaddius’s breathing deepen. But Thaddius did not speak, instead he closed the door behind and stepped out into the hall with Vettius.

  Vettius knew he must continue. Thaddius needed to hear what he was trying to say before his aggravation deafened his ears and blocked it out.

  “I love you as if you were my own son.”

  A flicker of hesitance flashed in Thaddius’s anger-filled eyes.

  “Thaddius, you need to hear me. I have always been proud of you, always hoped the best of you. Known you were meant for greatness and to lead with a gentle but firm hand. Yet the man I see before me now is not that man. You have been tasked with responsibility, but you believe you must be like your father to be a successful leader.”

  * Thaddius choked back the knot in his throat as he looked at the man he too had loved his entire life. Knowing that Vettius had love in return brought him more relief than he could have imagined.

  “Vettius I….”

  * “Wait, I have not finished.” He held up his hand to cut Thaddius off. “You are not your father. Nor are you intended to be. There is goodness in your heart,” he said as he took the liberty of placing his hand over Thaddius’s chest. This was a risk that could cost him his life, but he did not fear. He trusted Thaddius despite the mistakes the boy had made. He had a kind heart. “When you feel stress or worry or fear, seek the answers in your heart. For we have all seen how you act when you use your head.”

  When he finished, he pulled Thaddius into a firm embrace. At first the boy stood rigid with his arms motionless at his sides. But it did not take long for Vettius’s love to soften him. And when it did, the good hearted little boy cried as he

  wrapped his arms around the kind old man and held him tight.

  * The tears took with them the loneliness of a little boy who had longed to hear his father tell him that he had made him proud. Vettius had given him that gift, something he had waited far too long to hear.

  Neither of the men spoke when the embrace finished. No words were required. Both had given and received what was needed of them and by them.

  Thaddius entered his chambers and closed the door, leaning on it as he enjoyed the feeling of a lightened heart. “Are we finally alone?” a familiar voice asked. Calista, of course, he had forgotten about her. Taking in

  his room for the first time, he realized that Guya lay asleep on the settee with an empty vessel of wine next to her, no doubt Calista’s doing. And the girl, Calista, was wrapped in his cover sheet and laying seductively on his bed.

  “I uh..” he stuttered as he tried to determine what he should do. “I came to say goodnight. I will be staying in another room.” Before he could see the disappointment on her face or let her words convince him to stay, he turned and left. The screams of an angry Calista pressed him forward, confirming he had made the right choice.

  He let his feet direct him as he reflected on the events of the night. A smile threatened to turn into a full grin when he thought about how Calista must feel. He had denied her what she had wanted both nights. He had denied her himself.

  A familiar smell awakened his subconscious, and he found himself in a room he had not visited in months, a room he had avoided at all costs. The room of his late father.

  Now that he had broken the seal and entered the room, he couldn’t help but explore once more. Letting his hands caress the items on the table, he let his eyes wander over his father’s belongings. Everything was exactly how his father had left it.

  Soft fabric slipped between his fingers, and he looked down to see a familiar cloak. Shaky hands brought it to his face as he allowed himself to breathe in one deep reminder of his father’s scent.

  “I hated you!” He threw down the cloak and pushed the items on the table to the floor. They crashed as his feet. Some rolled to the side and some shattered into small pieces.

  “I hated you because I was never good enough!” Tears betrayed his resolve. The weight of his agony and

  grief overtook his legs, and he sank to the ground atop the broken pieces of his father’s possessions—the perfect reminder of their damaged relationship.

  “I tried. I tried everything! You loved horses so I became Rome’s finest charioteer. I practiced day and night to make you proud. And when they gave me that title, do you reme
mber what you said? Let me remind you… You said, Rome is only a small portion of the world. I am sure a rider from the Republic of Seres could surpass your skill.”

  Thaddius threw a broken piece of a pot against the far wall. “Well father, you may just get your wish. They may beat us, but this time you lose as well because the cost of the wager is your name!” He screamed his words, allowing a lifetime of pain to release in the simple confessions of a son who felt abandoned by his father.

  “S ellah?”

  “Dominus?” She could have sworn she had heard Thaddius call her name. She rubbed her eyes and sat up, clutching the blanket to her body as she looked around.

  A dark shadow covered her as a large form blocked out the little light she had. Panic gripped at her chest. Why was her Dominus here? Had she slept in? Did she forget to see to one of the chores he had demanded of her?

  But when she looked at him, there was something she had never seen before in his gaze. Part of her wondered if it was remorse, but she couldn’t be sure. She tried to keep her body from shaking as she asked the question that was plaguing her mind.

  “Dominus… have I done something to upset you?” His back straightened and he took a step back. The distance between them helped Sellah relax. If he had come to punish her, he would not step away. But his eyes, his eyes held a look that confused and saddened her.

  “Dominus?” she asked, wondering if his silence meant he hadn’t heard her.

  Yet he did not respond and continued to take step after step backwards.

  * Finally, he could no longer bear to look at her and turned to face the door. He struggled to clear his throat and form his words.

  “I do not want you to move the grain sacks today,” he stammered as he kept his back to her and his shaky hand outstretched for the door.

  “But I don’t understand. Did I not move them to your satisfaction?”

  With a sigh of frustration, he dropped his hands to his side. “It is not that, Sellah.…” he paused to find the words to say but none seemed suitable. “It is my command that is all.”