Desire Me Always

by Tiffany Clare

  His hands curled around the arms of the chair, and he started to lift from the seat. Amelia placed her foot square in the middle of his chest and pushed him back down.

  “I asked you to touch yourself. I want to see how you rub your cock. How you pleasure yourself.”

  It wasn’t the words that had his cockstand firm as ever and throbbing of its own accord; it was the fact that she blushed when she used the coarse words he had taught her. Catching her gaze, he fisted his hand around his erection and squeezed it.

  “Your turn,” he said.

  Amelia dipped her fingers into her sheath, and Nick nearly came. He had to squeeze his cock so hard that he thought he might pass out. She left her fingers inside her and sucked in her bottom lip as she watched his hand slowly loosen.

  “You’re close,” she observed.

  There was no denying that truth. “Straddle my thighs, Amelia. I want to be inside you.”

  She pressed her knee down next to his thigh and climbed onto his lap. He released himself, his cock jutting against the wet folds of her sex as if his instrument was in control. She sank down on him, a sigh passing her lips as she did so. Amelia reached behind him and clutched her hands around the edge of the chair for purchase as she started moving over him.

  Nick gripped her hips in his hands, guiding her, setting a pace that was both indulgent and frantic. Her breasts bounced in front of him, the nipples a strawberry pink and darkened at the hard tips.

  “Fuck. You’re so beautiful.”

  She thrust her breasts toward his face, and he didn’t hesitate to suck one tip and then the next into his mouth, letting his teeth graze around the tight peaks as she rode him. Nick wrapped an arm around her back, curling his hand over her shoulder to slam her harder into his body as she lifted and sank down on him. His other squeezed her breast as he rolled the firm tip around in his mouth. Her hands were tight around his shoulders; her head thrown back as sounds of ecstasy fell past her lips without care or thought that they would be heard.

  That he did that to her . . .

  He released her breast with a suctioned pop and shouted something incoherent as his seed let loose in hot, heavy jets while her sheath clenched around him, like a fist fucking his cock.

  She collapsed against him, the walls of her sex still flexing around him as she tried to get her breathing under control. Neither said anything as he lightly kissed the red marks he’d left on her pale skin from the scruff of his beard.

  “I want nothing more than a repeat performance,” he said.

  She lifted her head from his shoulder, her hands cupping both sides of his face, her thumbs rubbing over his beard.

  “I don’t think my legs can move another inch.”

  Nick grabbed her thighs and rocked her along his semi-hard cock, already reawakening with desire.

  She chuckled as she placed her arms loosely around his shoulders. She hadn’t an inkling of just what she had done for him this morning.

  He had come in here needing to forget the morning, the past that had been dredged up before he was ready to look it in the eye. And that had only been a small, unintentional glimpse he’d run across. What would he do when he truly had to face those demons once and for all?

  “I’ve lost you to your thoughts again, Nick. Tell me what happened this morning.”

  He rubbed his hand along her thighs, and as much as he hated to end their morning interlude, he lifted her from his lap. She scooted off the chair and stood in front of him, unabashed and taunting him not to look.

  He looked. The flush in her skin was fading and should be reawakened until it couldn’t so easily abate. The ruby tips of her breasts beckoned him to suck. The dark thatch of hair covering her mons veneris . . .

  With a sigh, he brushed his hair back from his forehead as he gave her a measured look.

  “Intercourse will not deter this conversation,” she said and crossed her arms, plumping up her breasts.

  “Are you sure about that?”

  “I want to help you, but I can’t if you keep locking me out.”

  “It’s not intentional.”

  He stood and walked over to the bell pull to call for a servant. He tossed her dressing gown toward her, and she caught it and slipped into the satin material. She didn’t say anything. She was waiting for him to explain himself. Nick pulled on his trousers just as a soft knock landed on the door.

  Nick opened the door for the housemaid. “Have the hip bath brought up and hot water. We’ll need a breakfast tray as well.”

  “Yes, sir,” she said.

  Perhaps he could explain to Amelia why he hated Highgate so much. Give her an understanding of why this place had the ability to make him beastly.

  “I thought we were going to attend breakfast with your friends.” She was at his shoulder, her hand light against the scars that crisscrossed his back.

  “We will make luncheon with them.”

  “What do you hope to accomplish, hiding away in our room?”

  He turned toward her and lifted one of her hands to his mouth, pressing a kiss to the inside of her palm. “No one will think anything of it, Amelia. We are newly married. It’s expected that we’ll be insatiable for each other and antisocial.”

  “I will only agree if you’ll talk to me about this morning.”

  There was no skirting around this issue, as she would have him figured out soon enough. Honesty might very well be his best defense. It wasn’t that he wanted to lie to his new bride; he just wished he could forever keep her in the dark on his purpose for coming to Highgate.

  “Landon and I rode out to the manor house. He hadn’t had a proper look at it since arriving.”

  “I would have come with you, had I known,” she said with a teasing lilt, trying to lighten the mood.

  “You were sound asleep. And you need your rest for what I have planned for us.”

  He thumbed her chin and tilted her head back to give him easier access to press a kiss against her lips. He didn’t linger; otherwise, they’d be lost in passion before either of them could stop. Not that that wasn’t a preferable state of being to what he needed to tell her; the question was how much should he tell her?

  “Nick . . . ”

  “When we were there, I saw someone I once knew. He was one of the teachers at the school I attended.”

  Her countenance grew fierce with a need to protect her husband. “Was he the one responsible for your scars?”

  “No. He had the ability to stop it, but he didn’t even try.”

  Amelia already knew a great deal more than he’d told another soul about his youth. It had been a short time in his life that he’d attended the all-boys school, but it had felt like a living hell he couldn’t escape at the tender age of eleven.

  “What did he say to you?”

  “He didn’t see me.”

  Amelia took his hand in both of hers and clasped it over her heart. He caressed the side of his other hand down her cheek.

  “Perhaps you should confront him,” she suggested.

  “I intend to.” While he planned to face the man responsible for the scars on his back, he hadn’t expected the monk to still be here. Two demons he must destroy. He wasn’t sure if that was luck or something to further torment his dreams.

  A knock came at the door, interrupting their stolen moment of solitude. Nick and Amelia broke apart as a maid came in with a tray of food and the morning newspaper.

  “Did you prearrange breakfast? I’m surprised they had something ready so quickly,” Amelia said when the maid left.

  He shook his head. “I wouldn’t put it past the Lady Burley.” He picked up an envelope tucked under the tray that was addressed to his wife.

  “How odd,” she said as she took the missive. His wife blushed as she read the contents.

  “Are you going to tell me what is written?”

  She blushed a darker shade of pink. “Merely that we should take all the time in the world since we are just married. But she did ask t
hat we meet them for lunch.”

  Nick grinned. “What will you do with the knowledge that everyone knows why we want to stay in our rooms?”

  She was nibbling on her bottom lip with indecision. Nick lifted the cover from the food, revealing a bowl of various berries, a dish of pastries, and another of bacon and sausage. “A breakfast fit for strenuous exercise.”

  “Nick.” Amelia’s voice was breathless.

  He walked toward her, forcing her back to their bed. She didn’t protest, and the look of hunger that ate up her gaze was exactly what he needed to see right now.

  “There is no better way to spend our honeymoon.”

  “Don’t couples generally travel to the Continent?”

  He shook his head. “It’s not about where we travel but spending as much time in delectable sin as we can manage.”

  He caressed her arm. Her whole body seemed to come alive at his touch. Amelia’s eyes slipped halfway closed, and she swayed marginally closer to him. Her lips parted, and her nipples peaked hard beneath her peignoir.

  “I do like the idea of remaining in bed all day,” Amelia said. How was it that she could be sated by their lovemaking one moment and be desperate for his touch immediately afterward?

  At least her husband had revealed what troubled him. A month ago, she wasn’t so sure he would be so forthcoming with what bothered him. They had come so far.

  Nick tugged the string that tied her robe in place. The delicate material gaped open, making her shiver. She was already slick between her thighs, from both their juices. Amelia took Nick’s hand and placed it between her legs.

  “You’re not sore, are you?”

  They had made love nonstop for nearly a day. That he was concerned and had asked had her smiling. “It’s a good sore.”

  “Then we will play until the bath arrives.” He tossed her down on the bed, coming over her but not entering her.

  “I feel empty inside when you put me in this state.”

  “Perhaps this will help.” He lowered his head to her breast and flicked his tongue against her sensitive nipple.

  She arched her back, trying to get closer, begging him silently to take it into his mouth, hard and fast. He only pressed light kisses there.

  Amelia lowered her hand and grasped his erection through his trousers. She wished more than ever that he was naked. That he was laying claim to her body and making her scream her surrender.

  Nick grabbed her hand and held it above her head. “You were in charge once; it’s my turn.”

  Amelia sucked in her lower lip. While it had felt good to have complete control over what they did, when Nick took charge, the things he showed her . . . taught her . . .

  “What do you have in mind?” she asked.

  He rubbed his thumb down the center of her lips; she stuck out the tip of her tongue, tasting the salt on his skin. His hand cupped her neck, massaging her as he rubbed his lips over hers. He didn’t kiss her, didn’t flick his tongue out, just rubbed his mouth back and forth; the heat of their breaths mingled and grew impatient with desire. Amelia curled her fingers around his arms, the corded muscle flexing beneath her hold.

  A rap on the door pulled them apart. Nick was standing before she even processed the absence of his weight. He tugged her to her feet so she could fix her peignoir; she did so hastily, out of breath, out of sorts and in need of his touch.

  Answering the door, Nick let the maid set up the bath. Two other maids carried in hot water and, before long, they were again alone.

  “Now what?” she asked.

  Hand around her nape, Nick pulled her closer, his lips once again a finger-width from hers. “Now we finish what we started.”

  He pulled off her nightclothes, leaving her panting and needy while she stood naked before him. It brought her great pleasure to see he was not unaffected, for he had to clench his jaw, and take in deep, even breaths.

  “Why savor this?” she asked.

  “Because I want to taste every part of you. Indulge both our senses.”

  “To forget?” she boldly asked.

  He nodded. “I think we can both admit we like losing ourselves in each other.”

  Her lips quirked up in a smile. How right he was. She took a step toward him, closing the distance that separated them. Her breasts heaved up against his chest; her hand wrapped around his side and rested against his scars.

  “Might I suggest we test the water before we eat?” Amelia kissed his chin.

  Sweeping her right off her feet, Nick set her in the water, stripped out of his clothes, and followed her in. And as promised, they indulged in every sense imaginable.

  CHAPTER FOUR

  Nick took Amelia’s arm and led her down to the dining room. It seemed odd that her nerves would strike her at such a time as this and that she felt panicked at the prospect of seeing his friends now. They hadn’t attended their own wedding dinner, her feigning tiredness, which was the same excuse that had kept her from spending time with anyone for the past week, one she felt less guilty about using as the days passed. It seemed easier to hide in her room. It was easier to avoid everyone’s questioning glances and speculating expressions altogether, but that was no longer an option.

  She would hold her head up high.

  She would be brave in the face of their missing adversary, Shauley. And she would thank everyone for the help they’d provided over the past week.

  “Do you think your friends will be upset we didn’t join them last night?”

  Nick patted her hand like one might do with an aging grandmother. “Not at all.”

  He was pulling away from her emotionally. Putting a rift between them that she stupidly thought would be fixed once they married. How wrong she had been. Intimacy aside, it felt like they were growing farther apart. She needed to fix this. Now, all she needed to figure out was how. Hot, sultry nights didn’t seem to be the end-all and be-all solution.

  Amelia placed her gloved hand against her cheek. She was hot and positive she still blushed. A combination she was sure Lady Burley’s cosmetiques could not fully mask.

  “What is it?” Nick asked, his hand squeezing hers.

  “I’m worried about what your friends will think of me. Of our actions,” she whispered, not wanting anyone milling about the inn to hear what she had to say. Even though she was putting on a brave face, she still hated that anyone would think less of her.

  “I can assure you that they have likely done the same.”

  “That doesn’t help cool my embarrassment at being caught in your bed at all,” she responded and was stopped from saying more when they opened the stained-glass double doors to a private dining room. The round table was almost as large as the room and covered in a cream-colored tablecloth. Dark wood paneling marched three quarters of the way up the walls, while the vaulted ceiling was painted hunter green. It was a cozy room that could be sectioned off for private functions.

  Lord Burley stood on their arrival and came forward to take her hand. He kissed the back of it.

  “A pleasure to see you both,” Lord Burley said. Not a hint of censure in his tone.

  “I have already arranged for tea and coffee to be brought in,” Lady Burley said.

  “I apologize for our tardiness,” Amelia said shyly, though she forced herself to look Lady Burley in the eye without flinching in discomfort.

  “I’d have been worried if you were more punctual.” Lord Burley said this to Nick with a wink. Amelia could feel her face flushing anew.

  “What are your plans today?” Lady Burley asked the men, obviously trying to change the topic.

  “Huxley will be arriving later this afternoon,” Nick responded. Huxley was Nick’s right-hand man and once filled the role of secretary. Huxley took over some of Nick’s business interests when Amelia had moved into the house and agreed to work as Nick’s secretary.

  “Has your sister already left?” Amelia asked Nick. She’d only had a glimpse of Sera at the wedding and had regretted not being able to
spend time with her the day before.

  “The school keeps her busy during the week. She said she could come back on Friday when her classes concluded, but I advised we’d be home by then.”

  This news surprised her. “I didn’t think we would be leaving so soon.”

  “I have only a few things to take care of while we are here. Our business affairs should wrap up before week’s end.”

  His explanation provided more questions than answers. Leaving in a few days was a surprise to her, since she hadn’t been involved in anything he needed to do in Highgate. Something she would have to remedy immediately.

  “What is there remaining for us to do?” She might be Nick’s wife now, but that did not exclude her from acting as his secretary.

  There was a moment of awkward silence that had Amelia looking around the table. Lord Burley held his wife’s hand, focusing on the rings she wore, but Amelia saw the amused smirk on his face. Lady Burley was watching Amelia with rapt interest.

  Amelia turned her focus to her husband, who was avoiding eye contact with her. A kitchen servant came in and set out the tea and coffee, her presence only extending the tension that was growing in the stuffy room.

  Amelia didn’t want to rudely depart now that they’d only just sat for luncheon. But she and Nick would discuss why he thought her role should change now that they were married. She would not be one of those women who gave up her pursuits because a man advised her of it. Unfortunately, now was not a good time for that conversation.

  “I’m absolutely famished,” Amelia said, steering the conversation in another direction.

  “As am I,” Lady Burley said, handing a teacup and saucer to Amelia and then making coffees for Nick and Lord Burley. “There are purportedly some beautiful trails for riding just beyond the village. I thought Amelia and I would take advantage of the scenery before we left Highgate.”

  Amelia opened her mouth to object but snapped it shut a moment later. Perhaps she did need time away from Nick. And a ride with Lady Burley sounded like the perfect distraction.

  “I’ll have Roberts ride with you,” Lord Burley said. Roberts was Lord Burley’s manservant, and Amelia had only seen him on two occasions and then, briefly.