Catching Fox

by Aimee McNeil

  Adalynne didn’t allow herself time to think her actions through. She knew she would talk herself out of what she had planned. Adalynne ran her hand along Kent’s chest, feeling his racing heart under her touch. Bringing herself up on her toes, she gently caressed her lips to his, quickly deepening the kiss with Kent’s insistence. It lacked excitement for Adalynne, she found herself just going through the motions. She tried to feed off his enthusiastic pace but she was unable to stir real passion of her own. Her reluctant mind refused to shut down and let the physical need drive her. She wanted to let go and let instinct take over. She hoped if the pressure of a relationship was off the table then somehow she could bring herself to enjoy the moment for what it was, to fill the void.

  Adalynne pulled back and met his brown eyes. They hungrily returned her gaze but he was allowing her to take the lead. Adalynne pushed him back onto the bed and climbed on top of him. She was desperate to ignite some desire. She found Kent attractive but she could not get her body to heat with need. Adalynne slowly unbuttoned his shirt, leaving a trail of kisses down his chest. Kent’s breathing became heavy as she teased him. Kent pulled the straps off her shoulders, revealing her black lacy bra. His hands roamed keenly over her body.

  A knock at her door startled them both. Adalynne climbed off the bed quickly, righting her dress. “Don’t answer it,” Kent pleaded, leaning up on his elbows.

  “I want to see who it is. Just a moment.” She peeked through the door to see Fox standing on the other side.

  “Who is it?” Kent asked, standing up from the bed, fixing his hair. The color drained from Adalynne’s face. “Are you all right?” Kent’s voice trailed off as she unlatched the lock.

  Taking a deep breath, Adalynne swung the door open. Her heart felt like it fell to the floor as she was left shocked by his arrival. “Fox? What are you doing here? How did you get in the building?”

  “I took a few pointers from you,” he stated casually with a shrug. His eyes roamed her body. Her dress hugged her figure shamelessly with a plunging neckline that left little to the imagination. Adalynne’s hands moved self-consciously to her hair under the heat of his gaze.

  When Fox walked in the room, his eyes darted toward Kent, straightening his shirt. The air became very thick in the room as the realization of what had been taking place hit Fox. Adalynne tried not to wear a look of guilt. He had no claim over her. She was free to do as she pleased. Adalynne tried to regain her composure as Fox’s eyes settled back on her.

  “Kent…Damon.” Adalynne awkwardly introduced them. Fox didn’t respond when Kent held out his hand toward him. Fox’s eyes followed Kent’s other arm as he wrapped it around Adalynne’s waist. The tension in the room was unbearable as Fox ignored Kent.

  “Why are you here, Fox?” Adalynne asked, searching his expression.

  “I came to thank you for what you did for my father. I have never seen him so happy. He’s a different person.” He looked into Adalynne’s eyes and Kent’s hand on her back was the only thing that kept her from falling into Fox’s beautiful embrace.

  “I’m glad you saw your father. He’s turned his life around and is now in a better place, but don’t thank me. He was the one who decided to make the change. He has become a good friend,” Adalynne said tentatively. She had invited herself into his father’s life when Fox didn’t want her to be in his. She couldn’t help but feel embarrassed with his realization. She wasn’t sure if Fox would feel like she overstepped her place but John had become an important part of her life and she had no regrets.

  A scowl formed on Fox’s face when Kent persisted in touching Adalynne possessively. “Do you have to fucking touch her right now?” he snapped at Kent. Adalynne could feel Kent’s body grow taut and the tension in the room sky rocket.

  “Yes, actually,” Kent responded tightly. Adalynne wanted to squirm away from Kent but she had invited him here after all and led him on.

  “Kent, please.” She smiled at Kent as sweetly as she could manage. She didn’t want him encouraging Fox’s erratic behavior.

  “You heard her. Get your fucking hands off her,” Fox commanded.

  “She wasn’t complaining about my hands a moment ago,” Kent stated angrily. She could feel Kent’s hand shake as he held her stubbornly. Adalynne was embarrassed at Kent’s admittance, even though she knew that it was obvious when Fox arrived. Her cheeks flamed red and she wanted to run away from the showdown unfolding before her.

  Adalynne’s thoughts betrayed her when she noticed how breathtaking Fox was as he stood before them, exuding enough power to pull all the air from the room Every time she found herself in Fox’s presence it became increasingly more difficult to motivate herself to move on without him. It would be so easy to throw herself at him and beg him to love her. She knew the thought was completely ridiculous but that was exactly what was in her heart. It wanted her to rip it out of her chest and hand it over, knowing he would walk away again.

  Adalynne gasped when Fox’s fist hit Kent in the face. It happened so quickly there was no time to react before the deed was done. “Jesus!” Kent cried out as he brought his hand up to meet his bloodied nose. Adalynne grabbed for her kitchen hand towel to give to Kent in a panic.

  “Fox! What are you doing?” She glowered at him. “I don’t get it. You don’t want to be with me but you also don’t want me to be with anyone else. Why don’t you want me to be happy?” Adalynne couldn’t stop the pleading tone that took over her voice.

  “I want you to be happy, that’s why I’m living this shit life.” Fox turned and stormed out of the apartment.

  “News flash, Fox!” She followed him out into the hall. He turned back and looked at her without saying anything, his intense green eyes wound so tight they took her breath away. “I’m not happy!” she screamed at him, then stormed back to her apartment and slammed the door. Adalynne leaned against the door trying to calm her nerves.

  “Wait…was that the singer from Outcome?” Kent asked with sudden awe in his voice.

  “Seriously, Kent, he just punched you,” she reminded him.

  “Yeah, but that guy is amazing on the guitar.” His sudden upbeat mood was irritating. “Can you get me an autograph?”

  “I think you need to leave.” Adalynne opened the door and motioned for him to go.

  “What about…” Kent walked toward her, his hand finding her waist.

  “Out, please. I need to be alone right now. I’m sorry.” She felt bad for kicking him out but she had no patience for company right now. “And keep the towel.”

  Chapter Twenty-Five

  The next afternoon, Adalynne made her way to her mother’s house. It had been awhile since she had spent time with Carmen, she missed her greatly. She needed Carmen’s wisdom and guidance now more than ever. Adalynne spent most of the night lying in bed trying to figure out the puzzle that was Fox. She was tired, confused, and completely unsettled. He had sauntered into apartment last night like he owned the place. She wanted to be furious with him for how he could so casually come in and out of her life, only to leave her mourning the loss of him every time. No other man could ignite such an intense reaction. She was pulled in so many directions her head spun.

  “Yum, new recipe?” Adalynne asked when Carmen pulled a fresh batch of cookies out of the oven. The scent of vanilla wrapped around her as Carmen set them on the counter.

  “You haven’t been around much. My plan was to entice you with new sweets.” Carmen smiled deviously.

  “I missed you too, Carmen. I have been so busy with the Music House and finishing classes. Do you forgive me?” Adalynne smiled guiltily.

  “Always.” Carmen chuckled. “Is there something you want to talk about, Addie girl? I can see you’re troubled.” Carmen leaned on the counter, bringing her full attention to Adalynne.

  “My heart won’t forget him. I can’t love someone else. I can’t be with anyone else…what am I supposed to do?” Adalynne sighed in defeat. She knew Carmen would know exactly who she was
talking about. Her warm brown eyes softened as she looked at her sympathetically.

  Carmen wrapped her arms around Adalynne’s shoulders. Her scent was so familiar it reminded her of her childhood. When Adalynne was small it had always been Carmen to soothe her injury or nurse her cold. Carmen was the one who showed her how to love when her own mother could not. Carmen had raised Adalynne since she was a small girl and she would always have a strong emotional bond with her. She had always made Adalynne feel special even when her parents were never around.

  “Matters of the heart can be very complicated but what I don’t understand is why you keep letting him walk out of your life. You didn’t give John the option and now he has turned his life around. You made him see the truth with your persistent love. They had been through hell and back. Those two are cut from the same cloth and sometimes people cannot see their path until someone shines a light on it. You, my dear, are the light for those men.”

  “But he doesn’t want me in his life,” Adalynne whispered.

  “Sometimes when we’re so close to something, we cannot see the truth when it is right in front of us.” Carmen smoothed Adalynne’s long hair down her back.

  Adalynne was surprised when her mother walked into the kitchen. “Mom? I thought you would be working. Why are you home so early?” Adalynne straightened in her seat. Adalynne watched the exchange Carmen and her mother made. It surprised Adalynne because her whole life her mother avoided creating a bond with Carmen, treating her as an employee and nothing more, but their look told of something deeper they had created. An understanding was reached between them without words.

  “Those cookies smell delicious, Carmen,” her mother commented, picking one up off the plate. It was like those few days after her mother had finally dealt with her father’s loss. She knew her mother was making more of an effort when she had spoken to her at Elizabeth’s funeral but it still surprised her to see her mother with her guard down. It was nice to look at her mother and not the façade she always wore. This was how she had always wished her mother was like when she was growing up. “It looks like I have interrupted an important conversation.” Her mother broke a small piece off a cookie and popped it in her mouth.

  “I was just unloading all my frustrations on Carmen in regards to my pathetic love life,” Adalynne confessed. She tried to smile past the emotional turmoil within her but it felt awkward. She wasn’t sure what her mother would say about the topic. She was nervous Matthew’s name would surface and that was a topic she couldn’t handle right now.

  “Love is a very complicated thing, isn’t it?” her mother said thoughtfully. Adalynne couldn’t help but smile at the word they both used when they spoke of the topic of love—complicated, it definitely applied. Everything about love to Adalynne seemed extremely complicated. “What has you so troubled?”

  Adalynne took a deep, thoughtful breath before she broached the topic of truth with her mother. “I have been in love with someone for a long time and they have never loved me back.” Adalynne was surprised by her confession to her mother. She had never spoken to her about Fox before. Not even to mention his name. “I know nothing else but to love him with everything I have and I feel so lost and alone. I can’t breathe.” Adalynne sighed.

  “A heart loves who a heart loves,” her mother said softly as she rubbed Adalynne’s back. Adalynne looked up to see Carmen sharing a supportive smile to her mother.

  Adalynne’s eyes watered as her mother spoke the words her father said to her once when she had asked him why he loved her mother. “Yes, it does,” Adalynne agreed sadly. Her mother pulled her close and Adalynne leaned against her shoulder.

  “Your father was a wise man, he knew how to love. It’s why I fell in love with him. You’re like him, you know. I see it in your eyes. I feel like I have stood in your way. I kept telling myself I was doing what was best for you but I think I was doing more harm than good. I made a promise to your father before he died I would make sure you were happy and I have only caused you pain…” Adalynne listened as her mother’s words broke off with a soft sob. She looked up and saw the tears in her mother’s eyes. “I have advanced in my career with ease, gained the respect in the field I sought, and became what I set out to achieve but I have failed at the most important thing. I have failed time after time to be the mother you needed.”

  “Mom, you—” Adalynne started but her mother cut her off.

  “There is something I have tried to show you many times but I couldn’t bring myself to do it.” She reached into her purse and pulled out a worn envelope and passed it to Adalynne.

  Adalynne looked down at the envelope that had her father’s handwriting on it.

  Damon Knight

  I was strange to see his name written across the front of the white envelope. Adalynne was overcome with confusion as she looked up at her mother. “You know who Damon is?” Her mother only nodded, looking away to avoid the tears that were about to fall. “I don’t understand.”

  “Just read it, dear,” Carmen encouraged. Adalynne realized Carmen knew about the letter as she looked up into her eyes. She didn’t know what to make of the situation.

  Adalynne opened the letter and read her father’s written words.

  Dear Damon,

  I remember the first time you showed up on my doorstep, no more than six years old, with the most determined look in your eye when you asked for my permission to be Adalynne’s friend, only to be turned away with my rejection. You would not have believed my shock when you showed up the very next week to go through the motions again with the same result.

  It never failed to amaze me the dedication you held for my daughter when you insisted on visiting every week to ask a question you knew I would not approve. I would never admit it at the time but I came to enjoy your weekly visits, especially when you changed the game plan and we battled it out with the chess board when you discovered my love of the game. Even when I told you there was no way you could possibly beat me, you were determined to learn the game to eventually win the upper hand.

  As the years went by and your dedication proved deeper than anything I could have ever imagined, I discovered the makings of a great man in you. I admired your heart and your devotion to my Adalynne. You proved to me it is not where a man comes from but what he makes of himself in his lifetime that really matters. I remember on one of your visits, I believe it was when you were asking for permission to take her to the prom, I asked you why you needed my approval and you said because Adalynne was the greatest part of your life and you never wanted to put her in a position she would have to choose between her family and you. My permission meant that I believed you were worthy of her.

  My reasons for denying you my consent changed over the years but when I saw the love you had for her I became scared you would take her away from me because like you, Adalynne was the greatest part of my life. There would have been no man I would have permitted to be with her, for I believed there was no one good enough for my baby girl. I am her father and I will fight for her until the end to protect her heart from any pain that might come her way. Though, I have come to learn over my many years that pain is unavoidable when it comes to love and what is life without love? No one deserves the joys of love more than my Adalynne.

  This is not an easy thing for me to do because as you know I am a very stubborn man. Much to my dismay my time on this earth is limited. Lying in this hospital bed has reminded me of that, so I need to make right the happiness I denied my daughter in my attempt to protect her. So if I do not have the opportunity in the future, I would like to officially change my answer to all the questions you have asked me over the years. After you left here today, I realized I no longer have a valid reason to deny you your request and maybe I never did have a good reason and for that I am sorry.

  I give you my permission to befriend my daughter, to date my daughter, and to love my daughter. As for the question I know that eventually you would want to ask, I give you my permission to marry my daught
er, should it be her heart’s desire. I will leave this life knowing you will continue to protect her when I no longer can. I know with all my heart you will do a better job than I have because the love you have for her is unselfish and true. It is one of the most remarkable things that I have experienced in my lifetime. I am grateful that I had the chance to know you.

  Please forgive me,

  Thomas

  Adalynne could hardly see the words through her tears as she read every word her father had written. She looked up at her mother’s sorrowful expression. “Dad wanted you to give this to him?” Adalynne struggled to speak.

  “Yes, I’m sorry.” Her mother sobbed.

  “When did you know about Damon?” Adalynne asked with widened eyes. She was completely bewildered by this new development.

  “The first time he showed up on our doorstep when you were at your piano lessons and every Sunday after that,” she confessed guiltily.

  “I have loved him my whole life. Did you know that?” Adalynne asked her mother. Unsure of what emotion was controlling her at the moment. She was confused by the realization that her parents knew Fox the entire time, unable to process it.

  “I suspected. Adalynne, I thought he was going to cause you to lose your way. He didn’t have the future you had before you. I thought he would be a distraction. I told your father we could never let him be with you, even when your father grew to love that boy I refused to let him entertain the idea. I thought I was doing what was best for you. Can you forgive me?”

  Adalynne hugged her mother tightly. “I have to go.” She kissed her mother’s cheek and then Carmen’s before she left, flying from the kitchen and out the front door.

  Adalynne hopped into her car and drove straight toward Fox’s place. She wasn’t sure if he would be there but she needed to find him and that was a place to start. Her heart was overwhelmed with hope that she could have her happy ending she thought she could never have. She just hoped it wasn’t too late.