Unbreak This Heart

by Betty Shreffler

  “That’s wonderful! This is your third memory this week.”

  A frown tugs at his lips. “If only they’d come faster.”

  Touching his cheek, I rub my thumb across it. “I know.”

  Adjusting his footing, he puts more weight on his stable left leg. Placing his hand over mine, he brings it to his lips and kisses it.

  “I want to remember more of us.”

  His forehead touches mine, and I fight back the pressure of tears.

  I want you to, too.

  ***

  The three-hour boat ride to Key West gave us too much time to get buzzed off multiple alcoholic beverages. I can’t stop giggling and Carter can’t stop pawing my ass. As people line up to exit the vessel, Carter grips the ledge behind me, leans his weight against me, putting me up against the wall of the first-floor sitting area. Dipping his thumb into my jean shorts, he pulls my hips flush against him. The flavor of whiskey and beer tease me as his tongue darts in and out.

  “C’mon, you two lovebirds,” Jane calls, interrupting our delicious moment. Pulling back from our kiss, his eyes glisten with arousal. He winks, and my delicate little lady parts yearn to have his touch. With a quick kiss to my lips, he squeezes my ass before grabbing his cane.

  Carefully, he walks down the ramp holding my hand in his free hand. He draws attention from folks looking in our direction. I imagine it’s odd to see such a handsome, tatted, fit man with a cane, but Carter pays no attention to the onlookers. With a quick cab ride, we’re exiting the vehicle outside our tropically decorated, one-story home for the weekend. Palm trees align both sides of the walkway, leading up to a large, brown door framed with two white pillars.

  Inside, the home is just as glamorous with shiny tile floors, white walls, and beautiful beach and wildlife paintings on the walls. The entryway opens into a living room with a kitchen and dining room to the left and two bedrooms to the right. Behind the living room are two sliding glass doors that open onto a stone deck surrounding a large swimming pool, and to the right of that, a hot tub partially tucked away behind palm trees and pretty landscaping.

  After exploring the beach house and picking our rooms, Jane and I find a store nearby to stock up on drinks and food for the weekend. Coming through the front door, I get distracted carrying bags in when I see Carter doing the best he can to complete laps across the pool. He’s not as fluid and powerful as the last time I saw him swim, but he still manages to force himself across.

  “Alex.”

  Jane’s voice snaps me back.

  “Yes, I was totally gawking.”

  “You two seem like you’re doing really good.” With a turn of her head, she returns her attention back to the kitchen. Hoisting the bags onto the counter, I open and empty the first one.

  “We are, but it’s still hard. There are moments I want to tell him how much I love him, and moments I miss how much he loved me.” My eyes moisten with the tightening of my chest.

  “It’s just as hard watching him struggle to walk. I’m worried he’s going to lose his personal trainer job and MMA contract.”

  “He’s got a few more weeks leave with his job and twelve weeks until he has to commit to another fight. Things might work out. He’s doing really well.”

  “Even if he does heal, I’m worried about him fighting again and getting re-injured.”

  “Has he said anything about wanting to fight again?” She shuts the refrigerator door, emptying the last of her bags.

  Removing the wine bottle from the brown bag, I dig through drawers for a bottle opener.

  “He hasn’t. He seems worried about what he’s going to do next for a job. I think he’s hoping to go back to being a personal trainer but preparing for if he can’t.”

  Jane gets two beers out of the fridge for her and Kyle.

  “Hand me one of those.”

  Taking it from her, I set it next to my wine to take out to Carter. Jane finds the bottle opener and hands it to me.

  “I can imagine how stressful that is for him.”

  “He said he wants a job close to me and to his family, I’m sure.” Pouring the wine glass full, I take a few swallows. “I hope this weekend he can have a break from having to worry about any of it.”

  Bathing suits on, drinks in hand, we move out to the pool. The midday sun is warm, and from where we are, we can view the horizon and above it, the bright blue sky and puffy white clouds as far as the eye can see. Beyond the pool, the ocean waves can be heard crashing onto the shore.

  Kyle kisses Jane as she hands a beer to him. Carter is sitting on one of the chairs, facing the ocean, lost in thought. Hand over his shoulder, I hand him a beer, interrupting whatever thoughts he had. He smiles up at me, taking the bottle.

  “I saw you swimming. You did well.”

  “It was harder than I expected.”

  Pulling a chair close to him, I admire his smooth, shaved face and strong jaw. He catches me looking and places a hand on my thigh, caressing it.

  “Would you like to take a dip in the hot tub?” Running his thumb farther up my thigh, it makes my skin tingle.

  “Yes,” he replies, his lascivious gaze meeting mine.

  “We’re going to take a walk on the beach. We’ll see you guys later,” Jane shares from behind us.

  Thank you, Jane.

  “See you later.” I wink as she passes by our chairs, observing her cheeky grin.

  With a little assistance walking to the hot tub, Carter sits on the edge and swivels, dropping onto the seat. With his hand extended, he helps me in. Pulling me forward, I straddle his lap, and he rubs along my back. Resting his head against the hot tub, he admires me, his thoughts clearly still troubling him.

  “Will it bother you if I’m like this permanently? If I can never walk down the beach with you, run with you, or remember how we met, what you meant to me?”

  “No, it won’t, and it doesn’t because I lo…”

  The touch of his warm hand caresses along my cheek, his eyes softening as they look at me.

  “Say it. I see it in the way you look at me. I want to know how you feel.”

  “I love you.” Like a bird fleeing its cage, my words give my emotions freedom. “I love you so much. You’re the same man you were before the accident, the only difference is you don’t remember everything I do. You haven’t changed. You’re still the same man I fell in love with and your limited mobility isn’t going to ruin how I feel about you.”

  With gentle pressure, he brings me forward, kissing me.

  “Did I ever tell you before how beautiful you are inside and out?”

  “You did,” I grin.

  “I’m a smart man.”

  As the warm bubbling water pools around us, he snuggles me as close as he can while looking up at me.

  “You still wanted to date me after being told by strangers I was your girlfriend. You had no idea who I was, and you gave me a chance, anyway. You’re more than smart. You’re incredible, and I love you.” Giggling, my cheeks become warm. “I’m sorry, I’ve wanted to say that to you for a while now and it feels so good to be able to.”

  “I know you have. I wasn’t ready before, but now…I want to hear it because I’m all in. I’m falling for you, but I’m afraid of losing you.”

  “You won’t lose me because I’m all in too.” Pressing my head to his, I caress along his muscled shoulders and arms. “My heart is completely yours if you want it.”

  “I want it, beautiful. I want this to last. You’re the only constant in my life. The only time I feel needed and useful.”

  “Give it time. Focus on healing. I know it’s hard for you, you probably feel stagnant and unsure of what’s next, but whatever you end up doing, you’re going to be great at it. That’s who you are. You never give less than a hundred percent in anything you do.”

  The corner of his mouth lifts briefly, then his smile is gone, stolen by his thoughts.

  “How do you feel about being back in your apartment? You feel safe there?
”

  Nerves tickle my belly as I answer honestly, “I do worry about Todd showing up unexpectedly.”

  “He hasn’t tried to contact you, has he?”

  “He sent me a letter because he knew I wouldn’t take his calls or messages.”

  “I can hear it in your tone. Talking about him upsets you.”

  “He hurt you. I’ll never forgive him for that.”

  “He lost it when you told him it was me you wanted?”

  “Yes. He’d lost his father and had been drinking. He wasn’t in the right mind to accept that I love you and wanted to be with you.”

  “And you were ready to move in with me?”

  “I was. I love sleeping in your arms and waking up to you each morning.” I chuckle at a memory. “That’s something you said to me once.”

  Fluid strokes of his hands caress along my back as he kisses me, his kiss reaching deep within, touching my heart, branding my soul.

  Sexy blue eyes playfully wink at me as his hand tugs at the string on my bikini top. “I love having you in my arms…and on my lap.”

  Rubbing over the fabric of his shorts, I stroke his growing erection. His kisses feather my lips as my bikini top is dropped into his hands and tossed onto the ledge of the hot tub.

  “I want to be on more than your lap.”

  Palms massaging my breasts, his thumbs swipe over each nipple, pinching them between his fingers.

  “I won’t keep my girl waiting then.”

  Lifting his hips, he slides his shorts down. My palms take hold of the ledge as his fingers slide my bikini bottoms to the side and his others tease his head to my opening.

  “Just the thought of being inside you makes me stiff.”

  Sliding onto him, his head falls back.

  “Hearing you talk like that makes me want you even more.”

  Dominating lips claim mine as he pulls my hips toward him, pushing deeper in. With his kiss stealing my senses, I lose myself to the motion of my hips gliding through the water and the sensation of us coming together, our need for one another deeply seated with more than just desire.

  CHAPTER FORTY-EIGHT

  —

  CARTER

  All day, I haven’t been able to keep my hands off my girl. Whether she was sunbathing, swimming, shopping, it didn’t matter. I wanted to be close to her, touching her, knowing the smile on her face is because of me. It’s tough not being able to lift her and swing her around or carry her to the bed, yet she still manages to make me feel like a man with the way she treats me. There’s never a moment where she’s disappointed in my limited mobility. Instead, she behaves like it’s a part of who I am, and she’s okay with it.

  To have a woman so openly accept me the way she has makes me realize how amazing she is, and that I need to do everything I can to make her happy. In my world of chaos and uncertainty, she’s the only thing that makes sense. I understand why I fought for her like I did. Why I confronted her ex. She’s worth protecting.

  The sound of Jane’s voice snaps me out of my lovesick haze.

  “Where do you guys want to go tonight? Did you see that restaurant and bar with live music we passed on the way back?” Jane asks, falling into Kyle’s lap with a beer in hand. Twirling his hand through her hair, Kyle smiles at Jane, his expression of a man content with his wife.

  “That sounds good to me, babe.”

  “How about you guys?”

  Jane looks at us, sitting together on the patio chair. I rub along Alex’s back as her sun-kissed face turns to me.

  “You up for some drinks and music?”

  “I’m all for sitting back with a beer and watching you dance.”

  Cozying up to me, she kisses me before sliding off my lap.

  “Let’s figure out what we’re wearing,” she says to Jane as they dash off to our room.

  I sit back and relax, knowing Kyle and I have a while before we need to get ready.

  “You good going out again? You seemed tired today from last night’s outing.”

  “Nah, I’m good. It’s the most physical activity I’ve had which is why I’m tired, but I can handle it.”

  “You sure? I don’t mind telling Jane it’s a night-in kind of night.”

  Letting the empty bottle slip from my fingers, I set it on the stone patio next to my chair.

  “Whether I sit here or at the restaurant doesn’t matter. Thanks for the concern though. I appreciate it.”

  “Of course. Honestly, it’s good to see you recovering so fast. I didn’t expect you to be up and moving like you are this quickly.”

  “I’m determined to walk fully on my own again.”

  “Don’t push too hard though. I don’t wanna see you injure yourself.”

  “I need to push my body. I can’t keep a woman like that with only one good leg.”

  “Are you kidding me? Alex isn’t going anywhere. You’re it for her whether you’re on one or two legs. Before your accident, I was sure you two were heading toward marriage.”

  With the setting sun, the air has shifted. Along my skin, the hair raises against the cool ocean breeze. With my hands braced on the chair, I carefully raise to my feet.

  “Then I had to go and fuck it up, along with my career.”

  Kyle instantly stands, ready to help me if needed. I wave his outstretched hand away and hobble forward, attempting to walk without the cane. With the next step, and no feeling in my foot, my knee buckles forward. Stable arms hook under my pits and catch me.

  “Easy now. That last beer probably did you in.”

  Kyle moves to my side, ensuring I’m stable.

  “You’re tore up, man. I get it, but you don’t need to be so hard on yourself. It was an accident. No one could’ve predicted what happened.”

  The tension in my chest tightens, frustration building. “I don’t want to lose the way she looks at me. She looks at me like I’m some damn hero, but I feel far from it.”

  Kyle shakes his head. “If only you knew how broken she was before meeting you. You helped her heal and trust again. You are her damn hero, so stop feeling sorry for yourself and get ready to have a good time with her tonight.” With a pat on my back, his words diminish my brooding mood.

  “You’re right. I need to get out of my head, but it’s hard sometimes. I don’t know where my life is headed next. If I’m not walking by the time my leave of absence is over, I won’t have a job. I’d like to return to the job I once had. In my gut, I know I’d like it, probably love it. But the reality is, I have to accept I might have to do something else. I applied for several jobs last week. One called me yesterday and left a message they want to do an interview. It’s got my head messed up. I’m not sure what I’m going to do.”

  Movement in the house draws our attention. The girls are giggling inside, almost ready. Seeing Alex’s chocolate wavy hair brush over her shoulder as she smiles loosens the knot in my chest.

  “I need to figure it out though.” My gaze remains fixed, watching her beneath the interior lights. “I need to focus on the future and stop worrying about what was in the past.”

  ***

  The band is on a raised platform in the restaurant bar, belting out familiar sing-along songs. The waitresses in their barely-there outfits are busy dishing out large plates of food and giant beer mugs to customers in the booths and high-top tables beyond the dance floor. It’s Friday night and the place is packed. We had to wait thirty minutes for our own booth, but the food made the wait worth it.

  Having shared a seafood sampler and fish tacos, I sit back in the booth, bringing the beer to my lips as Alex rubs my leg under the table, her pretty smile turned my way.

  “That was some of the best seafood I’ve had.”

  “I’m full and happy.” With a hand to her belly, she leans back into my open arm. Her head lulls to the side as I rub along her upper back. “That feels so good. Keep it up and I’m going to fall asleep.”

  Chuckling, I kiss her hair.

  “No,” Jane sq
ueals. “We need to dance.”

  “C’mon.” Reaching across the table, she captures Alex’s wrist in her hand.

  Pulled from my arms, I watch the two of them stroll onto the full dance floor. Kyle and I look over the table of empty plates and liquor glasses.

  “I don’t know how they have the energy. I’m exhausted.”

  “They’re running on alcohol. We’ll be carrying them to bed.” A frown tugs at the corner of my mouth, but I shove the emotions down.

  Seeing Alex get into the music is a wanted distraction. Toned and tan, her long hair sways as she rocks her hips back and forth. She and Jane are lost to the music, laughing and dancing. Both beautiful women enjoying the moment.

  “What was she like before me?”

  Pulling his gaze from his wife, Kyle brings his attention to me, his brows furrowing.

  “Terrified of being touched. Afraid she was going to be alone for the rest of her life. You wouldn’t know that now, would you? Not with the woman you see in front of us.”

  “No, all I’ve seen is how strong and caring she is. Did I pursue her?”

  “Yeah, you met her when she was still struggling. You looked past her wounds just like she does yours.”

  “You really care about her, huh?”

  “Like a sister, yeah. She’s a sweetheart. I was thrilled to see you two get together.”

  Eyes narrowing, my muscles tense when I see a tall guy with messy wavy hair moving in to dance with Alex. Hand wrapping around her hip, he goes for her ass, and she backs away, her body language indicating she doesn’t want the contact. Sliding to the end of the booth, Kyle catches me on the other side.

  “I can handle this.”

  “No.”

  Adrenaline pumping, I take a step with my good leg first, then the numb one. My leg tries to give. Clenching my fists together, I take a breath and push more weight onto my foot, knowing it’s there. I focus on the sensation I have going into my thigh. Another breath and I clench my teeth, forcing my movements, pushing through the numb and awkward sensations. Concentrating on the feeling in my thigh with each step, it gets easier until I’m within reach of Alex and the fucker pawing her ass. My grip slams down on his forearm, instantly drawing his attention.