Finding Passion (Colorado Veterans Book 3)

by Tiffani Lynn

  Thank goodness he seems to know how to redirect the current crazy train my head has taken. Warm breath slips through the fabric of my panties as his mouth hoovers close enough to cause madness, but not close enough to touch. Chills race over my skin and a ball of ache, need and desire pushes to the surface. He nuzzles his nose against my sex and I can feel him inhale. He groans and grips my ass under my dress as he nuzzles me again. “Tan sexy, tan dulce.” So sexy, so sweet. He whispers loud enough for me to hear against my sex.

  “Javier,” I beg, my voice coming out husky and strained, uncertain what exactly I’m begging for. He kisses me over the fabric and then tugs the panties down, setting them on the coffee table next to him, and arranges my legs so that I’m open and exposed in a way I don’t think I’ve ever been during a sexual encounter.

  His fingers slide through my wet flesh, skimming my most sensitive point until he reaches my opening and slides two fingers gently inside. “Tan mojado.” So wet. My hips lift as his thumb gently grazes my clit and my body sings as he plays me with his fingers. When his movement becomes steady and I’m lifting to meet every gentle thrust of his fingers, a moan slips out and his eyes shift from their work at my pussy to my face. The wicked smile he flashes me must mean he likes what he sees there because his attention stays on my face. He’s so slow and deliberate, building the anticipation as he moves his mouth toward my clit, his fingers still working at a steady pace. Eventually he’s close enough that I can feel the heat of his breath again and the first strong swipe of his tongue has me calling his name.

  Patiently he works me, swirling and sucking my sensitive clit in a way that makes me quiver. I lose all rational thought, wrap my thighs around his head and squeeze as my fingers thread into his hair. At this point I don’t think he could escape if he wanted to and before I know it I’m moaning his name uncontrollably as I likely suffocate him with my thigh lock.

  My mind and body come down slowly while my legs fall to the side bonelessly, and instead of the breath-starved man I think I’m going to find, I see his beautiful white smile aimed at me, lips still glistening with my arousal.

  “Javie, that was…” I can’t finish the thought because I can’t find the right word for it.

  “I’m glad you enjoyed it as much as I did.”

  “Mmmmm.” Between the alcohol and the mind-bending orgasm, my eyes feel heavy and I yawn.

  “Give me a minute to dress you, bella, before you pass out on me.”

  “I’m not passing out, give me a minute to recover and I’ll return the favor.” I giggle a little, still feeling both drunk and sated.

  “Oh no. That was no favor; it was a gift. You needed it. Now you need sleep.” After wrestling my panties back on me he scoops me into his strong arms and carries me to a huge bedroom toward the back of the house. The decor is feminine and floral, not at all what I’d expect from a man as macho as he is. Standing me back on my feet he reaches behind me and adjusts the covers and urges, “Climb in.”

  I stare at him for a minute, trying to understand him.

  “I didn’t figure you for a pink flowers kind of guy.”

  “This isn’t my room. It’s the room I have for my family to stay in.”

  “But it’s big enough to be your room, the master bedroom.”

  “I wanted to be prepared. One of the reasons being that I wasn’t sure if I’d eventually be taking care of my abuela or parents so I made two master bedrooms when I built this place. Besides, when I have guests it’s nice for them.”

  Now I’m confused and it must show because he runs his knuckles under my chin and asks, “Why are you making that face?”

  “You aren’t sleeping with me? Was I that bad? Did I embarrass myself? It’s been so long th—”

  Placing his pointer finger to my lips, he says, “Shush, it was beautiful and sexy and a hundred other things I can’t say out loud, but I won’t fuck you again when you’re this drunk. It doesn’t give you a clear choice and if you end up in my bed, I want to know you chose it for the right reason.”

  My eyes drift to the floor. “I was really looking forward to you holding me. I don’t know the last…well, never mind. Thank you, Javier.” I turn and climb into bed, facing away from where I left him standing. I’m embarrassed about the whole thing. I wanted to know how he would feel skin to skin with me, what his sweat-slicked skin would taste like, and if he’s as big in the places I haven’t seen as he is in the ones I have. But more than anything I wanted his strong arms to hold me, for the length of his big body to be pressed to mine and to feel the comfort and strength of another person, even if only for a few hours. I hear him pad out of the room and I’m almost asleep when he says, “Sit up, you need to take off that dress before you ruin it.”

  “What are you talking about? I just got comfortable.”

  “Tomorrow you’ll be upset you ruined that sexy-ass dress.”

  I grumble as I slide the zipper under my arm down and wiggle out of the dress. I should be embarrassed for him to see my old, half-naked body this close, but I’m tired and drunk and a little sad now so I take the T-shirt he offers and slip it on. When I lie down he taps my butt and says, “Scoot over.”

  “What?”

  “Scoot over. I’ll fall off the bed if I try to lie here and I can’t sleep on the other side of the bed.”

  I look at him funny. “What do you mean you can’t sleep on the other side of the bed?” I’ve never heard anyone say that before.

  “I don’t know why, but it’s a thing so scoot over.”

  I consider arguing a little but decide against it since I’m getting what I want even if I had to guilt him into it. Warmth engulfs me as he lines his body up with mine and slips his arm under my neck. When he closes those arms around me and I’m locked tight against him, I’m thankful for the comfort and I drift off before I can utter a word of thanks.

  A few hours later I wake up and the musky scent of Javier is directly under my nose. As I move my hand over the soft expanse of skin on his back I realize he’s wearing nothing but boxer briefs. Oddly, he’s on his belly and I’m on my side with my leg and arm thrown over him, my face resting on the outside of his shoulder. I’m practically smothering him with my weight, but he doesn’t seem bothered. The gentle, rhythmic rise and fall of his torso as he breathes lets me know he’s still asleep. I continue to let my fingers explore, goosebumps rising on his skin in the wake of my touch. I know I’ll probably wake him up but I can’t help it. Tracing along his arm, down his back, up his side, over the cheeks of his ass and down between his spread legs to graze his sac my fingers continue to trail. His breathing changes when I dip my fingers below the waistline of his boxer briefs to skim the smooth skin of his muscular ass. I can’t help but grip a handful of it. It’s then he surprises me when he rolls to his back, adjusting me quickly as he goes so I’m sprawled across his torso with all the perfect things lined up. His cock is as hard as a lead pipe between us and I can’t help but grind into it a little bit.

  His gravelly voice breaks the silence. “What are you doing? Aren’t you tired?”

  “I woke up and liked what was under me so I decided to explore.” His giant hands grip the backs of my thighs and adjust them so they are straddling him and he grips my ass cheeks hard before smacking them simultaneously. A soft moan slips out and I bend down to swipe his nipple with my tongue. When he makes a humming noise low in his throat I trap the little nipple between my teeth and tug lightly. The humming response is louder that time so I repeat the process on the other side. He obviously likes it because his hands knead at my ass impatiently and I smile against his chest.

  I sit up and pull the T-shirt above my head, tossing it to the side, and although it’s mostly dark in the room my eyes have adjusted enough that I can see his lips part. One hand moves from my ass around and up to cover my breast and I moan louder as he flicks the hard tip with his calloused thumb. “Javier,” I half whisper, half plead. “More.”

  This time both hands tak
e hold of my breasts and tease my sensitive nipples so I rock against him wishing he were in me and we didn’t have this fabric barrier. He double taps my ass quickly, “Grab a condom out of the drawer next to the bed and lose the panties, bella.” I’m quick as I strip and find the foil packet. While I’m doing that I hear his boxers hit the floor next to my feet and I climb back astride him again. Lord, I almost lose it when my bare pussy rests directly against his steely flesh while he opens the condom packet. I scoot back a little so he can slide it on and then I lower myself as slowly as I can on him. He’s so huge, and buried so deep, that it feels like he’s bumping my cervix in this position and I can’t help my groan as I begin a sensual rolling pace on top of him. His hands roam from my ass to my breasts almost as if he can’t decide what he wants to touch more. I continue to ride him steadily harder until my breasts are bouncing with the impact and I’m moaning on each downward fall. “Touch me,” I beg, and as soon as his two fingers touch my clit, every molecule in my body feels like it explodes into a million brilliant pieces. Javier grabs my hips and guides me to keep going, his hips rising and falling as mine do until he finally flexes up and holds me down on him and I can literally feel his cock pulse inside me. It’s unlike anything I’ve ever experienced. Absolute bliss. I sprawl on his chest and do my best to catch my breath as his cock softens inside me. Finally, I roll off of him and onto my side. The bed dips as he exits the bed and dips again as he slips in behind me and pulls me against his sweaty body, wrapping me up tight.

  “Are you mad I woke you up?” I ask, wondering what he thinks about that. What if he didn’t want to have sex with me again and I caught him off guard or he didn’t want to make me feel bad?

  “If anyone ever got mad because they were woken up like that I’d say they’re an asshole who doesn’t deserve your company.” From that one sentence my mind settles immediately and I relax and fall back asleep.

  Chapter Six

  Javier

  I’ve always had a thing for older women. Valerie’s only a few years older, but older just the same. She’s ridiculously sexy and confident in her body, in the way only a mature woman can be, but still a little shy too. As soon as I stole that kiss from her on the dance floor I knew that she’s the kind of woman who, when you find the right spot, is wild, demanding and sexy as hell in the sack. I haven’t been with a woman like her in way too long and just the taste I got before last night was as hot as it was enticing, but last night blew my mind.

  When that young guy pulled her to the dance floor I almost lost it. Several men were watching her for the good part of an hour—me included—but he was the only one brave enough to approach. I decided to give it a minute before I interfered, but there was no way Wonder Boy was going to take her home, not if I had anything to say about it. I let them have their fun, but by the time I approached it was time for him to go.

  I tried to tell myself that if one of the older guys, closer to her age, were to approach her I wouldn’t interfere, but I think my jealousy would’ve spiked no matter who had their hands on her. From the moment I saw the curve of her ass in that short dress at the benefit dinner, I knew I wanted her. Fucking her in the store room might have been an impulsive decision, but I don’t regret it. I usually don’t mix business and pleasure, and the only reason I caved last night when I brought her back to my place was because I knew my work for her was complete.

  Halfway home I realized how intoxicated she was and it almost killed me. I was dying to feel her sweet pussy wrapped around more than just my fingers, but I didn’t want to fuck her unless she was in her right mind completely this time. There was no way I was going to pass up the opportunity to at least get one more taste of her, though.

  Taking her home with me, I suspected she’d be a wild one, but I had no idea how wild until she tried to suffocate me with her thighs. Her reaction was amazing. I was painfully hard for hours after that, but there was no way I was pushing my luck. It took me forever to fall asleep and couldn’t have been out for very long when I felt her fingers on my bare back and ass. I knew at that point she’d slept long enough to be coherent though. Her movements weren’t fumbling or sloppy like they would’ve been if she were drunk still. She is a seriously sexy woman and I’ll never forget the sweet sound of her moans as she got closer to climax.

  Instead of doing all the things I wanted to do with Valerie this morning after I woke up an hour ago with a raging hard on, I got out of bed to run and do my daily workout. I wanted her so badly. I knew that I couldn’t do it this time though because I didn’t want to fuck her. I wanted to make love to her in the day light. I wanted it to be slow, so I could taste every inch of her skin and watch her expressions as my mouth took her pussy. The desire to feel her nails score my back as she moaned my name was so strong. More than anything I wanted to make her come and be the reason she wore a sleepy satisfied smile this morning, but I couldn’t afford to do that.

  If I did all the things I wanted to do to her this morning I wouldn’t be able to send her on her way. I’d probably fall all the way in love with her and I refuse to do that. I’d promised myself when I found out how likely it was that my cancer would come back that I’d never subject anyone to the pain of watching me die a slow horrible death. Now I feel even more strongly about it, knowing all the shit Val’s been through. She deserves so much better than that. She deserves a man who will be at her side, holding her and loving her, until her last breath. It’s pretty much guaranteed that won’t be me and I care enough to save her from that fate.

  When I enter the kitchen, I’m surprised to find her sitting at the dining room table with a cup of coffee in her hand. Her sleepy eyes are focused on something outside the window and I’m not sure she’s seen me yet.

  “Good morning, bella,” I say as I lean in and kiss her sleep rumpled hair. My gut aches a little, wishing I could do that every morning.

  “Hi,” she says softly, without looking back at me.

  I was afraid it would be awkward in the light of day or that I’d have to explain why I wasn’t pursuing her further, but she looks content and relaxed. “What’s got you so deep in thought?”

  “Nothing really. It’s so peaceful here that it’s easy to relax and let your mind wander. I’ll be out of your hair shortly. I knew I needed coffee and directions before I tackled the drive home. I wasn’t sure the GPS would work out here.”

  “Stay as long as you’d like. I have to relieve one of my guys on surveillance duty in an hour. I’ll write down directions for you. You okay this morning?”

  “Yes, it’s been a while since I’ve tied one on like that so I’m not great, but I’m functional. Thanks for taking care of me last night. If I woke up next to the young guy this morning, I’d be in worse shape.” She blushes a little and turns her gaze back to the window.

  “I didn’t think you were the cougar type, glad I could help,” I joke, hoping to keep the mood light so I don’t feel worse letting her go. She doesn’t respond to that remark, but I can see the lift in her cheek and know it’s from a smile.

  When I come back ready for work she’s fully dressed and waiting with her keys that I left on the counter when the guys dropped off her car last night after she passed out. She takes the paper with the directions written on it from me and gives me a smile that never reaches her eyes. I kiss her cheek like always and walk her to the car. Without pausing she slides into the car and drives away with a small wave.

  Two days later I enter a greasy spoon diner off the beaten path. I’ve been coming here for years and love the smell of fried food and apple pie that seems to seep out of the walls after all these years of carrying the same items on the menu. There are three waitresses I’d consider staples of the joint because they’ve been there as long as I can remember. I can’t figure out why none of them have retired yet, but am thankful they haven’t. They all know my order by now and put it in as soon as they see me. “Hey, sugar!” Zelda, the dyed blonde whom I’ve known the longest, calls out to me as I step
inside.

  “Hey, Ms. Z. How’re they hanging today?” Her rough strangled laughter, consistent with the number of cigarettes she smokes during her breaks, makes me cringe. “Since they’re fake they’re still sitting high.” She cackles. It’s the same routine with us every visit. I turn left to sit in my usual booth only to find it occupied by none other than Valerie Larinsky. Her honey-colored hair falls over her shoulders and hangs forward near her face as she leans over a book she’s reading that’s lying flat on the table. Her half-eaten plate of food sits off to her left, close enough for her to take the French fries off the side. Flipping the page one-handed, she doesn’t even lift her head as she continues reading.

  Why is she sitting here alone? It makes no sense that a woman like her is sitting here solo. Not that she should have a man with her everywhere she goes, but at least a girlfriend or two. She’s pleasant and friendly, obviously intelligent, so it makes no sense to me. I should probably leave her alone, but I can’t stand that she’s sitting there by herself having dinner and reading.

  “Bella, why are you eating alone?” I ask as I walk over and stand in front of her table. Her eyes widen as they meet mine and I can’t help but grin at her obvious shock at seeing me. A shy smile tips her lips and she closes her book. “Everyone I know is busy. Story of my life. I’ve gotten used to eating alone. No big deal.”

  “How often do you eat alone?”

  “Every night that Thea’s with Ron. I’m used to it now.” She shrugs and takes a drink of her water.

  “That’s a tragedy. Can I join you?”

  “Um…sure. I’m not the best company, but if you want to you can.”