3, 2, 1...Married!

by Sharon Sala

  “I’ll be at work in the morning,” she said. “You have my word. Now, will you go away and leave me alone?”

  “Yeah, I’ll go.”

  Holt stuffed his socks in his pants pocket, slipped on his shoes and gave the closed bathroom door one last glance. He’d have to see if Mr. Perkins could find him a shirt to wear home. That is, if he could get home today. Surely the Butler Bridge had been reopened by now.

  He plodded down the hallway, all the while wondering what the hell had happened to his life. As fantastic as last night had been, the last thing on earth he wanted or needed was to have Bennie in love with him.

  Holt had spent a miserable Sunday afternoon worrying about Bennie. And he hadn’t gotten more than two hours of sleep all night for thinking about how badly he’d hurt her. How could he have been such a dope? Why hadn’t he realized that Bennie was in love with him? He’d figured out that she wanted him as much as he wanted her, but he had assumed—until recently—that she was far too levelheaded to ever fall madly in love with anybody, least of all him. He’d meant it when he’d told her she was too good for him. She was. And he didn’t doubt for one minute that she was a better person than any socialite he could marry.

  But he didn’t want a wife who loved him. He wanted a mutually beneficial marriage, without the incumbrance of a fiery, passionate love that was bound to burn itself out and wind up ruining the marriage. He didn’t want his kids to end up with divorced parents the way he and his brothers had. A good solid business deal was the only way to prevent that kind of disaster.

  Somehow, someway, he had to make Bennie see reason. No matter how hot the sex between them had been, they would both be better off remaining just good friends and business associates.

  The minute he entered the office on Monday, he sensed something was wrong. His first clue was a missing Rene. He glanced at the closed door to Bennie’s office. Rene was probably with Bennie, helping her roast him over the coals. There was no hope that Bennie hadn’t shared details of their torrid night together with Little Miss Fairy Godmother Rene.

  After entering his private office, he removed his sport coat, draped it over his chair and then sat down in the tufted leather chair. A pristine white business-size envelope lay atop the clutter on his desk. He eyed the envelope suspiciously. A knot of apprehension formed in his gut.

  He ripped open the sealed envelope and removed the one-page letter. Scanning quickly he realized he was reading Bennie’s resignation.

  Dammit! She had taken this lovesick routine a little too far. How dare she resign! Didn’t she know he couldn’t run this business without her?

  Of course she knew. That’s why she was doing this—to put the fear of God into him.

  He was not going to let her get away with this. She was acting like a silly fool, letting her emotions get in the way of their friendship and her career. Hell, he had planned to give her a share of the business as a Christmas present, hadn’t he? She wouldn’t walk away from a deal like that.

  Clutching the letter in his hand, he stormed out of his office. Without even knocking, he flung open the door to her office and barged in. She and Rene were packing her belongings in two cardboard boxes, but stopped abruptly when he interrupted them.

  “Just what do you think you’re doing?” he asked.

  “Packing a few of my things,” Bennie said. “After I’ve worked out my two weeks’ notice, I should have everything cleared away so your new assistant will have a clean, empty office.”

  “You’re not leaving!” He glared at Bennie, who hadn’t even bothered to glance his way.

  When Rene cleared her throat, he turned his heated gaze on her. “Get out, will you? I need to talk to Bennie alone.”

  Rene looked to Bennie, who nodded and said, “It’s all right.”

  The minute Rene exited, Holt reached out to grab Bennie, but she sidestepped him. “Don’t touch me!”

  “Bennie, honey, be reasonable, will you?”

  “I’m being reasonable,” she said. “An unreasonable woman would have left you without giving two weeks’ notice.” She opened a bottom desk drawer and began clearing it out, dumping several things into the wastebasket in the process.

  “I don’t want you to go.”

  “I don’t care what you want.” She sorted through several files, then tossed two of them into one of the cardboard boxes.

  “Are you pregnant?”

  “What!” She gripped the edges of the box.

  “Are you—”

  “No!”

  “How can you be sure?” he asked.

  “Because it’s…it’s that time of the month,” she lied to him. “And I’m on time. I’m not pregnant. Aren’t you relieved?”

  “I’m relieved for your sake.” He took a step toward her. She backed up against the wall. “I’d make you a lousy husband.”

  “I think we finally agree on something.”

  “Don’t do this, Bennie. I don’t want to lose you. I don’t want to lose my best friend and—”

  “And the best darn assistant any man could have,” she finished his sentence for him. “Well, I’m tired of being your best buddy and I’m tired of your taking me for granted around the office, too.”

  “I don’t take you for granted,” he said, then admitted to himself that he probably had taken her for granted most of the time. “Look, maybe you’re right, but I want you to know something. I’ve already talked to Fred Sanderson about drawing up papers to give you an interest in Jackson Construction. It was going to be your Christmas present.”

  Bennie bit down on her bottom lip. Tears glazed her eyes. “I devoted the past five years of my life to helping you turn this business into a huge success, not because I wanted an interest in the company, but because I loved you.”

  “Ah, Bennie…”

  “I don’t want your pity. And I don’t want an interest in the company. All I want is for you to leave me alone and let me work out my two week’s notice. After that, I won’t ever bother you again.”

  He started to protest once more, but realized all his pleas were falling on deaf ears. Bennie was damned and determined to leave him and there wasn’t much he could do about it, except keep trying to change her mind.

  Chapter 7

  Today was her last day at Jackson Construction. In less than an hour she’d walk out of her office for the final time. After over five years with Holt, helping him build his company into a thriving business, she was leaving her job and the man she loved. She’d had more than one “second thought” about her resignation, which she’d tendered in the heat of anger. The first week, Holt had tried every possible persuasion to convince her to stay. Once or twice she’d thought he was actually going to break down and ask her to marry him. But the more stubborn she was, the more obstinate he became, until all this past week they’d been at a Mexican standoff, neither willing to give an inch.

  As much as she wanted to stay, she refused to surrender and let Holt win on his terms—with the former status quo remaining unchanged. After the night they’d shared at Wildwood Lodge, there was no way she could be only Holt’s friend and assistant. And she felt certain that, if he were totally honest with himself, he’d have to admit he felt the same. Beneath the hostility that separated them now, the sexual attraction that had only increased after their lovemaking sizzled like a live wire. She knew that he still wanted her—more than ever. And she still wanted him. But until he could give up his stupid plan to land himself a socialite wife, there was no hope for them. Not as friends. Not as business associates. And certainly not as lovers.

  Maybe by leaving him, letting him see that he couldn’t get along without her—either professionally or personally—Holt would come to his senses. It was a chance she had to take. For her sake and for the sake of…

  You don’t know for sure that you’re pregnant, she reminded herself. Just because you’re regular as clockwork and your period is two days late doesn’t mean a thing. And just because the home pregnancy test
you took this morning was positive doesn’t necessarily mean you’re carrying Holt’s baby.

  But what if she were pregnant? Then all the more reason to force Holt into choosing between some stupid “perfect wife” plan and spending the rest of his life with her.

  An insistent rap on the door brought Bennie’s gaze into focus as she glanced up just in time to see Holt enter. He’d always barged in, never waiting for an invitation, so why should today be any different?

  “I have something for you.” Holt held out an eight-by-ten-inch envelope. “It’s a letter of reference and your severance pay.”

  She accepted the package, making sure their hands didn’t touch during the transfer. “I’m sorry you haven’t found a new assistant yet, but the employment agency has promised to send over more applicants next week.”

  “Yeah, thanks for taking care of that for me.” Holt shifted nervously from one foot to the other. “You’ll let me know if you need anything.”

  “Thanks, but I’ll be fine.”

  “Got another job lined up?” he asked.

  “No, not yet. I’m going to take a vacation before I start job hunting.”

  Holt wanted, one more time, to beg her not to leave him. But dammit all, he had humbled himself just about as much as a man could and still call himself a man. Didn’t she realise that he’d give her anything she asked for, if only she’d stay? Oh, yeah, you’d give her anything—anything except the one thing she wants from you.

  When he offered his hand, she stared at it, reluctance in her eyes. “Well, good luck, Bennie.”

  His hand was a challenge. He knew it and she knew it. If she refused to accept, then he’d know she was afraid of what might happen when they touched.

  Bennie placed her hand in his. Tingles of awareness raced up her spine and jittery nerves tap-danced in her tummy. When she tried to pull her hand out of his, he held on tightly. Their gazes met, a silent plea evident in both his eyes and hers.

  “Take care of yourself, Holt. And I hope you get everything you want.”

  I want you, Bennie. I always have. But we’d only wind up hurting each other in the end. You’d eventually hate me because I could never love you the way you want to be loved. And I’d resent you because I gave up my sensible marriage plans in order to have you.

  He had to get away from her before he grabbed her and kissed the breath out of her. Without another word, he turned and walked away.

  She slumped down on the edge of her desk and let out a long, low sigh. He didn’t want her to leave. And she didn’t want to leave. But she was going. The only chance she had to make Holt realize he loved her was to let him try living without her.

  With trembling fingers, Bennie opened the envelope, pulled out the letter of recommendation and read it. Glowing didn’t begin to describe what Holt had said about her. Irreplaceable was the word that jumped off the page. Irreplaceable. Dear God, she hoped so.

  Then she removed her severance check. She had to look at it a second time to believe her eyes. She gasped when she noted the exorbitant sum. Was he out of his mind? A hundred thousand dollars? He didn’t have enough capital to be giving away that kind of money! What was he trying to do, soothe his guilty conscience? Was this check a consolation prize? A reward for loyal service? Or was it a payment for services rendered?

  She couldn’t accept the check. She wouldn’t! Even if he had that kind of money to spare—which he didn’t—she had no intention of letting him get even one little bitty good feeling from having been so generous.

  After tossing the glowing recommendation on her empty desktop, Bennie clasped the check in her hand and marched out of her office. Without bothering to knock, she stormed into Holt’s office. He looked up from behind his desk, then rose to his feet.

  “Is something wrong?” he asked, the puzzled look in his eyes verifying that he didn’t have a clue as to why she was so upset.

  She held up the check in front of him. “This is what’s wrong!”

  “Your severance pay? What’s wrong with it? I thought I was very generous. I know I owe you more, but—”

  “You can’t buy me off, Holt Jackson. You’re damn right you owe me more. A lot more. But it’s not money I want from you.”

  She waved the check in the air, then while he watched, mouth open and eyes widened in shock, she ripped the severance check into tiny pieces and threw the fluttering tidbits into his face. Before he could respond, she flew out of his office and into hers.

  Rene tried to speak to her on her way out and Holt called after her. But she didn’t look back. She didn’t dare.

  Holt kicked back in his recliner and hoisted a beer bottle to his lips. While he downed the drink, he flipped through the television stations, searching for the Falcons game. He had thought about giving Tiffany a call to see if she wanted to go out tonight, but he hadn’t followed through. Their last date had ended in disaster. He had asked her to stay the night, but wound up sending her home in a cab after their first kiss. The minute he’d kissed her, images of Bennie had flashed through his mind. Just having Tiffany in his apartment had suddenly made him feel as if he were cheating on Bennie. And that notion was downright stupid. Hell, he hadn’t seen or heard from Bennie, except through Rene, in nearly two months. And all Rene would tell him was that Bennie was doing just fine.

  How could she be doing just fine when he was feeling lousy all the time? He had hired and fired one new personal assistant and was now tiring out another. This time he’d asked the agency to send a man. But Wilson Houser wasn’t Holt’s ideal assistant. He and the man, who wore a suit and tie, drank cappuccino and didn’t know a damn thing about football, had nothing in common. He supposed Wilson was competent, but the guy couldn’t begin to fill Bennie’s shoes. He didn’t have her years of experience, her knowledge of the construction business or her winning personality.

  Even his plans to find a suitable wife had gone up in smoke. He’d managed to secure a couple of dates with the right kind of ladies, with Bo Reynolds acting as a go-between, but both encounters had left him cold. He didn’t necessarily expect any sexual sparks, but he thought it necessary to at least like the woman he married.

  Holt figured Bennie would be delighted if she knew that his personal life as well as his peace of mind at the office had steadily deteriorated ever since she’d left him. He found it difficult to concentrate on anything except her absence in his life. He went to sleep every night remembering what it had felt like to have her lying beneath him, moaning his name. And every morning he awoke knowing that when he went into the office, she wouldn’t be there.

  He had driven by her duplex apartment at least once a week, but couldn’t bring himself to stop and ring her doorbell. He’d played the scenario over in his mind countless times. He’d tell her he just happened to be driving by and thought he’d stop and see how she was doing. And she would tell him she was miserable without her job and his friendship. Then they’d kiss and make up. Well, maybe not kiss. Shaking hands on the deal would be safer.

  Bennie tossed the pregnancy-and-baby book on the floor and made a mad dash to the bathroom. Morning sickness, no matter what time of day it hit, was the absolute pits! She prayed she was one of those women who wouldn’t suffer bouts of nausea after the first trimester.

  When she finished throwing up, she lifted her head and groaned, then wet a washcloth and cleaned her face and hands. Since she hadn’t been able to keep much of anything in her stomach for weeks now, she had actually lost four pounds, even though she was two months pregnant. What a way to lose weight, she thought. Of course, during the next seven months she’d probably balloon into an elephant. Short, plump women usually gained weight all over and not just in their faces and bellies.

  Bennie had decided that if Holt hadn’t made a move to make things right between them before the end of the year, she would have to leave Fairmount. She couldn’t stay in town and chance his discovering she was pregnant. She intended making a trip home to Montgomery for Thanksgiving and
breaking the news to her mother that it looked like her only daughter was going to give birth “out of wedlock.” Her mother would be outraged at first and she’d fret about what her so-called friends would think. But in the end, she’d stand by Bennie. She always had. Even when Bennie had broken her engagement to Grayson. Her mother might be the quintessential society snob, but she loved her children and grandchildren. Of course neither of Bennie’s brothers had presented Mary Bennett with an illegitimate grandchild.

  There were times, like now, when she felt so alone that she wanted to call Holt and tell him it looked like he’d have to marry her, after all. But in her saner moments, she knew she’d never go to him, never make the first move. If he wanted her back in his life, then he’d have to come get her.

  Although both of his brothers had invited him to come for a visit during the Christmas holidays, Holt had stayed at home. He’d had it in his mind to ask Bennie out for Christmas Eve dinner—just as friends, of course. But when he’d phoned her, her answering machine had picked up. And when he’d driven by her house, her car had been gone. He wondered if she’d driven to Montgomery for the holidays. He knew she had a mother and a couple of brothers who still lived there. He really didn’t know much about Bennie’s family, only that her mother was a widow and that both of her older brothers were married and had children.

  Holt prided himself on being a smart man. And a smart man always knew when to give up and admit defeat. He wasn’t saying that he loved Bennie, not the romantic, hearts-and-flowers kind of love she seemed to want. But he had discovered one important thing during her absence—he couldn’t live without her. Why it had taken him nearly three months to realize that if he married anyone other than Bennie, he’d be miserable, he didn’t know. Maybe old dreams died hard. Even as a kid, he’d promised himself that someday he’d marry one of those fine society women, who wore pearls around their necks and possessed an attitude of superiority that could, without an unkind word, put others in their place. He had thought that, with enough money, he could buy himself one of those pedigreed hothouse flowers. He had wanted a business deal marriage that would by its very nature circumvent any possibility of divorce, once there were children involved. But what he had wanted wasn’t what he wanted now.