Always

by Maverick, Henley

  I felt the emotions bubbling to the surface, and I knew that the tears were not going to be far behind. I had to get a grip on myself. I wanted to hear him out.

  “I went off to the army, filled with dreams and goals. After basic training, I was immediately sent to the Middle East. I never imagined I would find myself thrown right into combat. And I had so many illusions about what combat would be like. All of my thoughts and preconceptions were wrong. The horror I saw and the constant fear I felt were worse than anything I ever could have imagined. I saw friends being blown to pieces. I saw enemy soldiers falling to their deaths by my own hand. Every day I felt a piece of myself die until I no longer recognized anything about who I was.”

  The tears were coming now. My heart felt like a knife was ripping right into the middle of it. It was had to breathe.

  “Your letters were the only things keeping me going for a while. But, as I started to lose myself, I realized that if I made it back home I would no longer be the person you loved. I would be a broken man you would not even recognize.”

  “Oh, Haden…” I started. I reached out and took his hand.

  “So, I slowly became short and unresponsive. Eventually, you took the hint and moved on. I figured it was better that way. And I was wrong once again. When I finally came home, I was a mess and went into therapy. I was diagnosed with PTSD. I’ve seen a lot of therapists and tried so many different approaches over the years, trying to get back a semblance of who I used to be but nothing has worked. I have crazy emotional extremes, my anger is off the charts, and the nightmares are constant.”

  “You could have reached out to me,” I said. “I would have dropped everything and come running to help you. How could you not know that?”

  “I was afraid to talk to you. I was afraid I’d end up hurting you. I had an incident with my first therapist when she pushed me to talk too much. She kept probing, and I lashed out and shoved her off the couch in her office. I don’t even remember how it happened. It’s like my arm had a life of its own. I couldn’t bear to put you in that kind of danger.”

  “I’m not afraid. I know you love me. I know you would never hurt me,” I said. “Surely you know me better than that.”

  “I wanted to reach out to you every day. But I had to keep you safe. When I saw you at the bar last night, I knew that you are the only one in this world who can help me. I had to talk to you...” he paused. “But also, last night I had a nightmare where I hurt you. It felt so real. That’s why I left this morning. It was like an omen of all of my worst fears coming true. I couldn’t believe that it happened in a dream. I could never forgive myself if I did something in real life. Keeping you safe is always my main thought and focus.”

  Haden was crying now, too. I’d never seen him shed a tear before. He had always been a rock. He was always so steady, which made me feel safe. But right now, he was showing me vulnerability and I had never loved him more than that moment.

  “Honey,” I said. “It’s okay. We will get through this together. I love you. And I am willing to do whatever it takes to help you. I just want you. This burden you have put on yourself has to go. You are stronger than you think. I can see it. You’ve always been the strongest man I’ve ever known.”

  Haden pulled me closely and kissed me. A tidal wave of relief fell over me as years of stress and pain relinquished the hold on my heart.

  He scooped me off the couch in his large, strong arms and carried me into the bedroom. Slowly, he began to peel off my clothes, until I was nude and waiting for his hard girth to part my secret lips. I was wet and ready for him.

  Haden stood over me, his hard member in his hand tapping it against his palm like he was ready to punish me with it. I wanted to be punished. I just wanted his domination. To know that this powerful man loved me, would always be there to protect me, and provide the emotional relief I needed whenever I needed it, was intoxicating.

  He entered me slowly and deeply. I let out a loud groan in his ear as my breath caught in my throat. I’d wanted this all-day long. It was an exquisite drug I knew I would never be tired of. And I was fully addicted and wanted to overdose on it.

  I thought he was going to do me hard and rough the way it was in the alley, but he took his time. The lovemaking was not rushed. It felt like we had all the time in the world. It was safe. That is the best way to describe it. Neither one of us was ever going anywhere. We were reunited once again, and this time we were both determined to never let anything come between us again.

  I was finally truly home.

  Chapter Twenty

  Three Months Later

  Haden

  “Looking good!”

  I turned to face the voice of compliments coming down the steps of the apartment. Bouncing towards me was the beautiful Ava, the sexiest woman I’d ever laid eyes on. She always looked like that in my eyes.

  I shoved the cooler full of water and sodas into the back of the SUV with a grunt. I think we had enough to supply a village.

  “Hey there, gorgeous,” I said.

  She leaned forward and kissed me softly before leaning into the back of the SUV to help me check on all the luggage and supplies we’d packed. I grabbed her ass and gave it a little squeeze. Ava laughed and playfully batted my hand away.

  “You know you love it,” I teased.

  “Sure do,” she smiled.

  “Well, everything seems right. I think we have everything,” I said.

  “I agree.”

  I kissed her again, closed the hatch door, and got in the car. After giving another smile and a wink, I started up the engine. We were off to our vacation destination.

  The drive was long, but fun. I’d always enjoyed road trips, ever since I was a kid. Mostly I loved stopping for all the stupid roadside attractions, little shops, and the different restaurants.

  I couldn’t believe how happy I was. A mere three months ago, making it through the day had been difficult. My emotions were completely out of whack and I didn’t know from day to day if I would even be able to hold a job. Now, I’d actually been promoted and my dad was talking like he wanted me to take over the construction company for him when he retired. He’d noticed the great strides I’d made with my PTSD and my relationship with Ava, and he was proud of me. It had been awhile since my dad could say he was proud of me. It had been a while since I was proud of myself too.

  We arrived at Geneva Marina on Lake Erie that afternoon after making great time. We had several hours of daylight left to enjoy the lake before heading inland to our hotel not far from the lake. Standing there looking out at that beautiful blue water was like a dream come true. How could any sadness exist in the world when something that beautiful was around? I had no idea.

  I led Ava to the boat I had rented and we set sail. It was a beautiful day and unseasonably warm. As soon as I heard the weatherman say that this weekend’s temperatures were going to go up to almost seventy degrees under a rare heat wave, I raced to make the reservations for the hotel and the boat. Ava almost wet herself when I told her the news.

  And now here we were coasting in the middle of this huge mass of picturesque water. The breeze was chilly in stark contrast to the warm sun, but the winter had been overall warmer than normal—the lake had yet to even freeze over. It seemed that luck was really on our side.

  “Wow, this is perfect!” Ava said. “How did you know this has been a dream of mine since forever?”

  “You told me. A long time ago. You don’t remember?” I asked.

  “Well, I guess my memory is just not as good as yours is.”

  “I think you make up for it in many other ways,” I replied. I gave her a sweet kiss to solidify my point.

  She was snuggled up against me as I leaned back on the lounge chair. The boat was beautiful and cost me a lot of money to rent for two days, but I didn’t care. Ava was worth every penny, and besides, I wanted something perfect for what I had planned.

  “I hate to disturb you, but I need to go get something f
rom downstairs,” I said.

  “You want me to get it?” Ava offered.

  “No, thanks. I’ll be right back.”

  I went down to the lower deck and grabbed a little box out of my backpack. I’d been very careful not to give Ava any ideas. She didn’t have a clue.

  When I returned, she was sipping on a glass of champagne and looking at me curiously.

  “What did you forget?” she asked.

  I smiled. “Something very important.”

  She eyed me suspiciously. She could tell I was definitely up to something now.

  “What’s going on?” she asked.

  “Close your eyes,” I said.

  “What for?”

  “Because I said so,” I replied with a smile. I was excited, but nervous too. What if something went wrong? I took a deep breath and got ready.

  “Okay…” Ava said. She closed her eyes.

  I got down on one knee, pulled the ring box out of my pocket, and opened it.

  “Ava Andrews... I love you with all of my heart and soul. I’ve made so many mistakes in my life but allowing something to come between you and me was by far the worst thing I ever could have done. I want to make this vow that I will never lose you again. Ava Andrews, will you marry me?”

  Ava’s eyes flew open wide and the glass of champagne fell from her hand.

  “OH MY GOD!” Ava gasped.

  Her eyes were fixated on the ring.

  I had to laugh. “Is that a yes?”

  She began nodding yes, shaking her head up and down quickly. “Yes! Yes!”

  I slid the ring on her finger and then stood up wrapping her up in my arms.

  “I was hoping you’d say that,” I replied before kissing her.

  I love Ava so much.

  I vowed to never let her go. And I never will.

  About the Author

  Henley Maverick lives in Northern California and when she's not writing, she's reading, shoe shopping, or at the beach.

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  HenleyMav

  https://www.amazon.com/Henley-Maverick/e/B07FF8Z532

  authorhenleymaverick@gmail.com

  Also by Henley Maverick

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  Sneak Peek

  Check out the first chapter of Royally Fast, releasing October 21, below!

  “A reporter?” Luca squinted at his friend. “I’m not sure that’s a good idea. You know damn well I don’t trust journalists anymore.”

  “Juliet Baptiste was five years ago, my friend.” Bax smiled, patting him on the shoulder. “Not every reporter is going to pose as a maid just to sneak into your house. Despite what you may think, there are some good journalists out there, like this one,” he added, pulling his cell out of his coat pocket. Bax showed him a photo of a smiling blonde woman holding a book in her hands. It was titled, Dreams: The Key to Your Heart’s Desire.

  “Grace Brewster? She’s…”

  “… American,” Bax finished his sentence. “Twenty-seven years old, works at the New York Register. Elle discovered her about two years ago, when she published that book. It didn’t exactly light the publishing world on fire, but she loves it. She and Grace have become very close. They talk on social media every day and spend hours on the phone. Elle thinks she’d be the perfect choice to write a profile on you.” Elle was the head of Luca’s PR team and also happened to be Bax’s girlfriend.

  “I don’t need the attention,” Luca grumbled. “There are plenty of local writers who would be more than happy to do a piece on me. I don’t need to import them from overseas.”

  “Do you like it when local tabloids say all kinds of nasty shit about you?” Bax’s firm tone and his question put Luca in a difficult position. He did have a point. Quite often, the locals made up stories about him in the media. They seemed to love to feed the rumor mill, especially when it came to his love life, or the way he was governing Moreno.

  “No,” Luca sighed, dropping his gaze from his friend’s frustrated stare. “I just think it’s a lot easier to ignore them than give them more ammunition, you know?”

  “I think it’s time for you to set a few things straight,” Bax whispered angrily. “It’s finally time the world knew what kind of person you are. You are a good man and you are doing the best you can under incredibly difficult circumstances. I’m tired of local gossip reports using rumors about you to sell their trash magazines and papers.”

  “But why did you choose her, Bax?” Luca asked, casting a glance at the cell screen.

  “I just thought you might find it easier to talk to someone who wasn’t from Moreno,” Bax replied, as his friend handed him back his cell phone. “I’ve been planning this since January, Luca.”

  Luca scowled at Bax and shook his head. “I don’t think she needs to understand me. She just needs to be discreet for as long as the interview lasts.”

  “For the whole seven days,” Bax said with a grin.

  “Seven?” Luca opened his eyes wide in disbelief. “What kind of…?”

  “This won’t be a typical interview,” Bax interrupted firmly. “She will live in the castle, study your habits. I’m sorry I didn’t tell you sooner, Luca, but I’ve been planning this with her editor for more than a month. He thinks a thorough interview would be ideal for you, and I agreed. Do you mind?”

  “Well, you should have asked, and I do mind,” Luca grumbled. “But, it doesn’t sound like I have much of a choice anymore. Let’s hope she’s as professional as you think she is. When is she coming?”

  “Tomorrow morning,” Bax’s answered quickly before Luca had a chance to argue. “Don’t worry. If she’s not professional, we’ll send her home. But something tells me she will be fine. Oh, and it might do you some good to talk to her about her book. It’s about utilizing your dreams to embrace your untapped desires. It seems like something that could be beneficial to your… state of mind,” Bax said, hesitating as he struggled to find the right words. Luca understood why; there had been no real rhyme or reason to his behavior lately, and Bax had been searching for anything that might help his reluctance to truly embrace his role has king.

  “I will think about it,” Luca said with a nod, debating whether or not he should thank his friend. He liked appreciated Bax’s initiative, but this particular scheme was way outside of Luca’s comfort zone. At the same time… it sounded like an ideal way to shake up the routine that he had found himself trapped in as of late.

  Luca left Bax standing in front of the castle and jumped into his newest car. He may not know what he needed to make his life more satisfying, but there was one thing he knew for sure…

  The feel of rubber hitting the road would, at the very least, make him forget about the reporter. For a little while longer anyway.