The Embrace

by Jessica Callaghan

  My body froze. I had always suspected that my love for Gabriel had been stronger than his love for me but to be told it was all a lie made my bones chill. I could barely move and it was only when Robert began to speak again that I was shaken from my moment of comatose.

  “I was infatuated with Joan but I knew it would never amount to anything. She was betrothed and I was bound to Lucius by a force beyond my control. The power that links the sire to the child is more powerful than anything I’ve ever encountered, as I’m sure you know. So I just watched her. I could have tasted her without any problems. I would have erased her memory and carried on, but I didn’t want to. I didn’t want to risk ruining the mystique I had placed around her. I wanted her to remain a paragon of human beauty for as long as possible.

  By 1536 it seemed clear to us that Anne would not remain on the throne for much longer. In January of that year I realised I would have to act. Joan was 25 and she was married, although her husband was an oaf and I saw her take many lovers. She would be with child soon and I knew that if Anne was removed then Joan could fall out of favour too. They had been acquaintances and Henry wouldn’t want any reminders of his mistakes. He always took things personally. I knew she would be taken from court and from my life forever, so one night after she visited one of her lovers I approached her. I compelled her, to numb the pain, and then I made her into one of us.

  Lucius was furious, but for once Diego stood up to our creator. As Lucius’ first mate I had always succumbed to his will but Diego had done so far more willingly than I. He really loved Lucius and being his favourite while I was with Joan had boosted his confidence. He convinced Lucius to let me go free, and eventually he did.”

  I pushed him on how a vampire is freed from the bond with their maker but he didn’t have much to say. I was desperate to know how I could be freed from Gabriel.

  “It’s something that is older than all of the vampires alive today. It’s just words but somehow these words take on a more powerful meaning. It’s hard to explain but when the time comes you just know how to do it. Sorry I can’t be of more help, but there aren’t any manuals for this kind of thing.

  After I was freed, Joan and I travelled North. We remained with Lucius and Diego for a while but they went to Germany when the 17th century began and had their own life. That part of the story will come later, I promise.

  For the time being Joan and I travelled Europe, drawn to places with political or social change. It was like a drug for us. The streets were filled with violence and rebellion, and the crowds made for easy prey. In 1705 we reached Hungary in the middle of a revolution.

  Joan was different from me. She was more impulsive and reckless. I loved her for it but at the same time it worried me. She would never think of the consequences.

  While we were in Hungary, Joan returned to the nest with Gyorgy. He was a Hungarian revolutionary. He seemed like a scared little boy to me, but he was utterly enthralled by Joan and I could see why she chose him. She wanted a slave, not a master. I was just baggage by this point.

  It was the most difficult moment I had encountered in decades, but I made my decision. Joan was careless and she was a risk to my safety. I loved her but I could tell she no longer loved me in the same way. She wanted someone she could control. So I freed her.”

  The sadness in his eyes told me that even 300 years hadn’t healed the wound left by freeing Joan. It just went to show how intense a vampire’s emotions are compared to a human’s. We feel everything with intensity and every emotion remains in our heads for eternity, ready to rise up and torment us whenever it chooses.

  I rubbed his shoulder gently, trying to comfort him. “Wasn’t that difficult? I can’t even imagine.”

  “It was unbearable.” He agreed. “I had been with her for 169 years. She was the first human I had turned and she had been my true mate. Losing her to another vampire was agony, but I knew I had to move on.

  I travelled to Italy almost immediately. I had never been but I was drawn by it’s quiet tranquility. It was a place of creativity and discovery, and even though I was alone I felt part of something bigger. Vampires aren’t meant to be alone for too long. We’re meant to have someone with us. I eventually became tired of being on my own, and I decided to find a mate.

  Around 20 years after I reached Italy I found my next mate. Her name was Catherine, and she was 16. I saw her working on a market stall, selling flowers to passersby. She was exquisite. She had the flawless olive skin and ebony hair that was an Italian trademark.

  She was so different from Joan. Joan had looked like a porcelain doll on the outside, but inside she was pure evil. Catherine looked seductive and powerful, even at her young age, but I could see that she was really just a timid young woman. She was lonely too, and so we had that in common. I could feel it coming from her in waves.

  I waited until she closed the stall a few nights later. She was walking home when I surprised her. I wanted to feel this kill, not like Joan’s death. I wanted to be there for every moment. It was messy of course. Catherine wept like a scared infant. It was a sound I would have longed to hear from anyone else, but from a future mate it felt wrong. I was so glad when it was all over.

  The next night I realised my mistake. She was beautiful, but she wasn’t strong enough. If I had taken more time to watch her, like I had done with Joan, then I would have known that. Some people are just not meant for our world and Catherine was one of them, but I couldn’t turn back time and so I had to do my best. I decided to be her protector, her guardian.

  We stayed in Italy for a while. I thought it would be best to stay somewhere familiar to her, to ease her transition. She seemed to perk up after a few years and it almost made me hopeful for our future together.

  She fell apart not long later. About five years after I turned her, she became dangerously curious. Most vampires go through a phase like that near the beginning, although I have to say yours did come a lot earlier than most. She accidentally stumbled upon a sect. They were very ancient, powerful vampires who had gathered in Italy to try and control some of the artistic movements of the time. She stumbled upon them after following a potential victim. The human escaped and told all of the villagers who then pledged to hunt the sect down and kill them. In those days Europeans were more open about the idea of demons. They accepted them, but they feared and hated them.

  In revenge the sect launced a vendetta against Catherine. She was such a foolish girl. I blamed myself for creating her but I had seen something of myself in her. I’ve thought about her so much in the past few centuries, wondering whether I could have saved her. I never should have turned her to start with, it was just a selfish act.

  We escaped just in time and fled to some other European nations. We eventually settled in Austria. I had been once with Joan, but it was different with my new companion. I felt more protective. Joan would never let any one else protect her.

  Of course a leopard never changes it’s spots and Catherine couldn’t change her personality. She was seen killing a villager. We had been hiding in a small town to keep a low profile from the sect but the villagers in that area were always amongst the most superstitious. When they saw Catherine, they suspected straight away what she was. When they had evidence, they burned her to death.

  I could feel her pain while they did it. I wasn’t there to see it, but when I closed my eyes I could smell the burning flesh. I could see the flames. I felt it all through her. I wanted to stay and mourn her death. I had only been with her for 16 years but she had been so vulnerable. It felt like losing a child.

  I wanted to take the time to mourn, but it was too dangerous for me to stay there. I had been seen with her before and I knew the villagers would find me. If that happened then I would probably be killed. I fled to Western Europe for safety and I decided to stay there for a while.

  I returned to Paris, which was very strange. I hadn’t been back there since my days as a human. I had spent so many evenings there with Corinna before moving
to England, but going back was surreal. In those days Paris was a popular stop off before the journey to America. Everyone was talking about the society in America and it sounded tempting.

  I was in a port in France when I ran in to Diego. I hadn’t seen him in 150 years but it was like we had never been apart. We made the journey to America together. We commandeered a private room on a ship and ordered the crew not to bother us. It was nice to catch up with him but he told me some dark stories about Lucius. Stories that scared me.”

  The way he spoke sent shivers down my spine. “What kind of stories?”

  He shook his head vigourously. “I will tell you but it’s not the right time yet. We went to America and spent a few years together but after a while we decided to travel the country separately. We were friends, but we had no sire bond so parting felt like the right thing to do.

  Just before the 1900s dawned I moved to the Deep South, to try my hand at property developing. About 2 years after I arrived I met Charlotte. She was a young, black worker on my cotton plantation. Everyone who worked there loved her. They called her Lottie for short. She had a strong maternal instinct, a family girl who had helped to raise her 2 younger brothers. I turned her a few weeks after I first saw her.

  It was nice to have a companion again after Diego and I parted. Lottie adored me, I could tell. She wasn’t as fearful as Catherine, but she wasn’t vindictive like Joan. I wanted to return to Europe to show Lottie the countries I loved. We left in 1910, but the journey weakened her. She was never the same after that.

  I practically had to hunt for her. She was weak but she still tried to act like nothing was wrong, to protect me. I loved her more than I had loved anyone before, and she knew that seeing her pain would be like torture for me. We reached Russia in 1930. I hadn’t spent much time there before but I thought the cold climate and high crime rates would suit Lottie’s needs.

  I sired a Russian man while we were there. He was a soldier, named Alexei. He was about 30, much older than my other newborns, and he was the first male I had turned so it wasn’t out of love. It was for Lottie. I thought that having someone else to help her hunt and to shower her with love would be a good thing, but of course she was too weak to turn anyone herself.

  He was a nice boy. He had been an alcoholic in his human life and so he was quite impulsive, but he loved Lottie like a true brother. I guess we were a dysfunctional family for a while.

  In 1958 we travelled to Holland. I was trying to move us closer to England, where I felt safest. Alexei hadn’t been that far West before so it was a journey for both of them. She was getting weaker and I knew I had to do something. I had wanted to be in England by the time we entered the 1960s, but in 1964 she was still too weak to travel.

  Her brain slowly deteriorated, following her body. She would have lucid moments now and then but most of the time she dressed as if she was back in the 1800s. It was so hard to watch her die like that but I couldn’t bring myself to end her life.

  In 1964 she had a lucid period. We thought she was getting better but she told me she didn’t want me to end up resenting her. The next night I woke early. The sun hadn’t set, but Lottie wasn’t in the room.

  I found her on the roof, and I knew immediately it was too late to save her. She walked in to the sun and killed herself. It tore Alexei and I apart. For about 6 months we sat in silence, killing small animals who came near the home. I freed Alexei that same year. We had no reason to be together anymore, and I couldn’t look at him without thinking of Lottie. He told me he was going back to Russia but I haven’t seen him since.

  I travelled around Western Europe, trying to forget her. I arrived in Spain in 1975. I had hoped to find Diego there as it was close to his home of Portugal, but instead I found Joan.

  I hadn’t seen her for 270 years but she was just the same. She was still as beautiful as ever, yet something about her scared even me and I had been a vampire for over 900 years. She had three male servants with her, each one of them doting on her like Gyorgy had. She said she wanted to start a Spanish sect, with herself as queen. She said that she needed an edge over other vampires, and so she wanted some of my blood.

  I don’t know if Gabriel mentioned this but vampire blood is powerful when ingested by a fellow vampire. It’s fatal to a human but to a vampire it’s a powerful elixir. I am an ancient creature, and so my blood had even more valuable properties.

  I refused to give her anything, of course. I didn’t trust her motives, and I had suspicions that she would drain all of my blood while I was in a vulnerable state.

  I managed to escape but she pledged a vendetta against me. I’ve spent every moment of the last 40 years trying to escape her. In 2002 I was in Belgium when her legion attacked. They are much strong in number now. There were at least 10 in Belgium alone. That’s why I fled to England again. It’s the place where I feel safest.

  I guess that’s the end. Now I’ve found you.”

  Chapter 30I had so much to think about. I was intrigued by Diego’s story, the one which still terrified Robert 250 years after hearing it. Gabriel hadn’t been mentioned yet either and so I was still in the dark as to the connection between them.

  “Are you going to tell me what happened to Diego?”

  Robert shuffled awkwardly at the other end of the sofa. He was obviously trying to avoid answering the question.

  “The past few months have been filled with people lying to me about important things. Gabriel kept everything from me, and now my whole life with him seems to have been a lie. I’m fed up of people keeping secrets from me.” It felt good to let it all out.

  “It’s not a nice story, especially not for you, but I promised to tell you everything I know and there’s no way around it. It was wonderful seeing Diego again. I knew him as well as I knew myself, and that’s a luxury for our kind. He was keen to tell me what had happened since our last meeting. I had expected him to be with Lucius for eternity so it was a shock to see him alone.

  After Lucius freed me, he and Diego traveled around Britain for a while before leaving for Germany in 1600. Lucius was an incredibly powerful vampire, even back then. I don’t even know exactly when he was created, but he was ancient even by my standards, and he wanted control.

  When they were in Germany they set up a sect of their own. Lucius was in control and he put Diego at his right hand. They named it the Germanitas Order. They took the name from the Latin for brotherhood, as well as a play on it’s German birth place.

  Any vampire knows that sects are more powerful if there’s a blood bond between the members, so they created new male vampires. By 1611 they had 8 followers. In 1648 they were still going strong, with even more followers. Diego had power in this order, more than he had ever had before, and it gave him independence.

  One of the vampire recruits by the name of Aiden, was desperate for Lucius’s approval. He often brought back men who he thought Lucius would like, and he only killed when Lucius permitted it. He lacked any foresight or cunning, but he was bloodthirsty even for our kind.

  That year Aiden introduced a new vampire to the sect. The new arrival had recently been orphaned after his master committed suicide. He was English but his master had been Indian and so they had been traveling back West when the suicide happened, leaving his mate stranded in Germany. Lucius accepted him as a member of the group on Aiden’s insistance.”

  He stopped and sighed, avoiding my gaze.

  “What’s wrong? What are you keeping from me?”

  “The new vampire was called Gabriel.”

  I could hardly swallow. My whole body tensed up in shock and my eyes began to water. Gabriel had never told me about his creation and it felt wrong that Robert was the one revealing this intimate part of my mate’s past.

  “I’m sorry. I knew this wouldn’t be easy for you. Gabriel was ambitious even then. Aiden became his lackey, following him around all the time and doing his bidding. They seemed to keep secrets from the others in the group, and they rarely hunted wit
h anyone else.

  In 1700 Lucius decided to become a recluse. He was probably around 2000 years old and many of the ancient vampires decide to do the same at some point. He left the Order to Diego. The Diego I knew would have been a wonderful leader. He was levelheaded and strong; He never gave anyone more or less than they deserved, and he told me the men accepted him as they had accepted Lucius. He was an older brother to them, and some of them were his own proteges. Despite this, he was only in charge for a year.”

  “What happened?”

  “He was overthrown. Gabriel and Aiden rose up against him to take over the Order. Gabriel wanted more authority and he wanted to make the Order more manipulative. He wanted to change their goals, make them more about killing women rather than brotherhood. Diego refused to put them down as it went against the Order’s beliefs, so they removed him by force.”

  I was stunned. Gabriel had been my world for years. I had thrown away my only chance at a normal life for him, doting on him and waiting for him to visit me time and time again. He had been a light during the dark years of depression inflicted on me after the murders. Hearing that he was capable of such crimes made me feel sick inside.

  I didn’t even notice Robert moving towards me until his arms were already around me. I knew that his body was cold but for some reason it felt like there was a warmth radiating from him.

  He gently stroked my hair and kissed the top of my head. I felt waves of love pouring through that kiss and in to my body.

  “Who does that room upstairs belong to?” I asked, trying to change the subject.

  He moved me at arms length and I could see the confusion on his face. I hadn’t even expected the question to come out so it surprised me too.