“Yeah, I do.” Eric glanced up. “You don’t think I’m nuts?”
Jamie shook his head. “No. I think it’s what you needed. I’m glad for you, that you had that help.”
Eric swallowed. “I was wondering if I was just… imagining things or something.”
“I really don’t think so.” Jamie reached out and touched Eric’s arm gently, shooting a glance at Ben, who nodded. “You’d been gone so long. I bet you probably would never have come back without help. He—” Jamie nodded toward Ben. “—needs you.”
Eric glanced at Ben. “I’m… well, truth be told, I’m still scared to death of having a mate.”
“I’d think you were nuts if you weren’t,” Jamie said.
“Oh?” Eric raised his eyebrows.
“After what you went through… anyone who dealt with that would be afraid. You trust Diana and that will help. You trust your wolf and that will help. But it’s going to take time and faith.”
Ben squirmed at that, and Eric looked at him. “What’s wrong?”
“I… faith is hard for me.” Ben frowned, but Jamie nodded encouragement. “Uh, my mamá is Catholic and tried to raise me Catholic. I do not believe in that, but with all of that there, it was hard to accept the gods my papá followed too.”
“It would be,” Jamie agreed, turning back to Eric. “All the more reason to keep yours. He will need your faith too. Just remember what a lucky bastard you are that Diana visited you.”
Eric laughed. “Yeah, okay. Thanks. I feel a little less crazy.”
Jamie shrugged a shoulder. “It’s what I’m here for. Well, the faith part, at least. I’m afraid we’re all a little crazy….”
Chapter 6
BEN HAD enjoyed meeting the jaguar, the former human, and their mates a lot more than he’d expected to. He was grateful to find none of them had seemed even remotely put off by his accent or background.
He was going to have to get over that. Hopefully he’d be able to once he’d met more of the pack, though that carried its own terror. He was comfortable enough with Tanner to know his new alpha didn’t put up with bigotry. But there was only so much an alpha could really do. He’d just have to wait and see and face it when the time came, which was hopefully not until the full moon, some three weeks away.
It’d also helped Ben to see all of the alpha’s friends were men with male mates. He’d never have imagined there were that many same-sex destined mates in the world. Then again, he’d never known jaguar shifters existed, and the idea of changing a human to a wolf was just as foreign. He had known human destined mates existed—his own parents were proof of that—but the idea of them being same-sex and the changing were altogether different and something he’d have to talk to his papá about.
In the meantime he had work to do with his mate and to simply get settled. Eric would take a lot of care and patience until he was ready to even think about bonding, much less claiming. Not that Ben blamed him. The things Eric had been through… well, Ben didn’t know if he could be as together as Eric was after all that—even after spending so much time as a wolf.
Eric had offered to help him carry his things in from the car. Ben had hesitated initially, but it hadn’t taken him long to figure out Eric needed to feel useful for something, so Ben had taken him up on it. He’d set Eric to bringing in the boxes and figuring out where to stack them in the limited space he had. He’d been expecting to find an apartment when he got to Pittsburgh, not a room in a house, so he wasn’t sure where he was going to put everything. The CR-V held more than he’d realized.
He had handled some of the other things, like his backpack with his computer, his guitar case, and so on.
“Oh, do you play?” Eric asked, setting a box down.
Ben looked up at him, then back at his guitar. “Not in a while. My mamá liked music, but she was so insistent I focus on school and learning that I could not spend as much time with it as I wanted to. It got to be such a fight that I had just set it aside, but I could not leave it behind completely.”
“I can understand, at least to a point. I’m sorry to hear how your mom was, though. Not cool.”
Ben shrugged a shoulder. “I’ll get back to it eventually, though I once thought it was what I’d do—play the guitar, rather than with numbers.”
Eric laughed. “Playing with numbers is important. And it’s what brought you here.”
Ben considered him for a moment before nodding. “That is very true, cariño.”
“Which, despite my hesitation, I’m very glad for,” Eric whispered before disappearing out of the room.
With a huge grin, Ben set his guitar carefully in the corner, then went on the hunt for power outlets while Eric carried the last of the boxes in. He was happy to find an outlet behind the bedside table. Just as he did, his phone beeped at him, reminding him it hadn’t been plugged in for a while. “Cariño, could you get the phone charger out of my backpack there?” Ben asked, pointing at the bag he’d left on the desk.
“Sure.” Eric picked up the backpack but had trouble getting it open. At first he couldn’t grasp the pull, and then he seemed to get ahold of the pull but couldn’t get it to move.
Ben had to struggle to keep from laughing, until frustration hit him that wasn’t his own. If it was coming across their fledgling bond, it was bad. Ben was annoyed with himself for not thinking about the trouble his mate would have with it. He hurried over to Eric. “I am sorry, cariño. I wasn’t thinking.”
“I can open a damned bag,” Eric grumbled. “I feel like a fucking invalid. Or a brand-new pup. Or something.” He struggled with it another moment, then finally had it opened. With a sigh he handed the cable over. “Sorry.” His cheeks were red, and he wouldn’t look directly at Ben.
“No, the fault is mine. I know you’re having trouble. I am sorry for—”
“No. Really.”
Ben swallowed but nodded, understanding Eric needed to let it go. He dropped his gaze, but then he realized Eric was wearing jeans. “Uh, if you are still having trouble with zippers, how did you close your jeans?” The question was out before he’d meant to ask it, and he slapped a hand over his mouth.
Eric just smirked at this, though, and pulled up his T-shirt, showing a belt holding the pants up, with the button open and zipper down.
And Ben got a clear view of part of Eric’s dick. His own responded, thickening quickly, and he blurted, “We definitely need to get you some clothes.”
Eric blinked at him, then looked down and yanked at his T-shirt to cover his open zipper. “Uh….”
“I did not mind the view one bit, cariño.” Ben looked up at Eric. “Though I can’t say I’d want others to have the same view.”
Eric’s red cheeks darkened a little, but his lips spread into a small smile. “As much as having a mate still freaks me out… I like hearing that.”
Ben crossed the short distance between them and reached up to brush a thumb over one red cheek. “Please… do not worry so about needing to work through this. I can be patient. Really.”
Eric hesitated, then nodded. “Okay.” He tilted his head. “Can I do anything else for you?”
Ben considered it. “I still have clothes to unpack and such.”
“I can help. Even if it’s got a zipper.” Eric managed to smirk, and Ben smiled.
“Most of it is in boxes.”
Eric laughed. “Even better. Where?”
Ben directed him to the boxes that had his clothes. “I do not care how they get put in the dresser. Just… let me know so I can find them, or I’m afraid I’ll be running around the house naked until I find you to tell me where they are.”
Eric raised an eyebrow. “I’d prefer you don’t spend a lot of time naked around Tanner and Finley, thank you. Unless you’re, like, shifting. Or something.” His cheeks were once more red when he finished.
Ben gave in to his wolf a little and pulled Eric into his arms, needing the touch. “Is this okay?”
Eric looked up,
meeting Ben’s gaze. “Yeah,” he whispered. “This is okay.”
“I do not want anyone else, cariño. Until you tell me you do not want me at all—and even then, I do not think I will do anything. Even if you outright reject me, I do not see myself wanting anyone else. I already care about you. I hurt for all you’ve been through.” He closed his eyes when Eric slid his arms around him and held him tight.
“I won’t. I mean it, Ben. I’m not going to reject you. I… I don’t think I have it in me. My wolf wants you. I am sure you were given to me by Diana herself. I can be a bit of an idiot, but not that much.”
Ben chuckled. “Well, then. We just give it time.” He couldn’t resist nuzzling Eric’s face a little. Then, so he didn’t give in to temptation and actually kiss Eric before they were ready, he pulled away. “So, the simple solution is… make sure I know where my clothes are.”
Eric laughed. “All right.” He gave a shy smile, then kissed Ben on the cheek before stepping back. “Let’s see what I can do.”
He was slow, but Ben wouldn’t have said a word about it in a million years. Eric kept at it, even though it took time for him to organize things and fold the articles that invariably became unfolded as they were unpacked. Ben was—probably absurdly—proud of his mate for trying so hard.
Instead of making a big deal about any of it, Ben focused on taking care of the things that Eric would have really struggled with. Like unpacking his computer and cables, connecting everything, and emptying the overnight and toiletries bags—which did have zippers to them.
In an amazingly short time, he was more or less unpacked. The boxes that held the books and other things he’d brought along were still stacked in the bottom of the closet and along one wall, but there were quite a few less after Eric finished.
“Thank you,” Ben said, when they had the empty boxes stashed and everything pretty much put away. “Is there anything I can do for you?”
Eric looked up at him for a long moment, then took a breath. “Could… would you be willing to go shopping with me?” He dropped his gaze.
“I would be very happy to, cariño.”
Eric met his gaze, raising his eyebrows. “Really?”
Ben nodded. “I had intended to offer. I didn’t want to push but hoped….” He let out a breath. “Hoped that, as your mate, I could help in some way.”
“It’s what you are, Ben. You don’t have to hesitate over the word. I think Finley’s right. The more we say it, the easier it’ll get.” Eric smiled. “And I think you will help. It’ll help calm me to have you near.”
“Then we will go. Tomorrow, if you think you can handle it.”
Eric nodded. “Okay.” He turned toward the door but paused. “Good night, my mate.”
Ben’s smile was a mile wide. “Good night, cariño.”
“BUENO!”
“Hola, Papá.”
“Mijo! How are you? Are you in Pittsburgh?”
“Yes.” Ben let out a breath. “I found my destined mate, Papá.”
“Really? Oh, that’s wonderful, mijo! Who is it?”
Ben appreciated the fact that his papá didn’t automatically ask who she was. “It is a he. His name is Eric. He is the alpha’s best friend. He’s been through a lot, but he’s a wonderful man.”
“I’m so glad we found that pack for you. How did you meet him?”
“He was just walking into the room when I showed up. He was not expecting to meet me… or a destined mate at all, actually.” Ben picked at a spot on his jeans. “He was hurt, Papá, badly. It may be a long time before he could be ready to claim.”
“There’s nothing wrong with being patient, mijo. You have learned that lesson.”
“I know, Papá.” He sighed. “I just… I am frustrated.”
“That is understandable. Do you want to tell me what happened? Can you?”
“I… it’s not up to me to tell everything, but….”
BEN FELT a lot better after spending some time talking with his papá. He learned more about destined mates, though he still had a lot of questions. Unfortunately, they were things his papá didn’t even know, so he was still in the dark about a lot of it.
When the phone rang that night right before bed, he thought at first it was his papá. But instead of his papá’s name, he saw Tina and smiled. “Bueno!”
“Oh. My. Gods! You met your destined mate!” The screeched words had him yanking the phone away from his ear. He held it out for another moment while Tina kept it up, until finally, her voice quieted and all he heard was “Ben? Ben? Ben!”
Ben chuckled and brought the phone back. “Hi. Are you done screaming in my ear?”
“Ugh. Here I am, so happy for you, and you’re going to complain about me screaming?” She huffed but then laughed. “Yeah, I’m done. Holy crap, what happened?”
“Who would I be if I did not tease you?”
“A good brother?” Tina asked.
Ben snorted.
“Right. And that didn’t answer my question! So… tell me!”
“Fine, fine. But then you must tell me about your new boyfriend.”
“Hey! How’d you find out?” Tina actually sounded a little embarrassed.
“Papá told me.”
Tina grumbled under her breath something Ben couldn’t understand, then sighed. “This is why I didn’t want to tell Papá, but no, Annie had to say something while Papá was on the phone. Well, at least you’re on the other end of the country and can’t beat him up.”
“Do I have reason to?” Ben asked, though they both knew he wasn’t about to actually get violent. He could look threatening, though, and had on a few occasions when one of Tina’s boyfriends seemed like they were getting too close.
“Ugh. No. And you didn’t tell me about your mate! Fine. I’ll talk, but you first.”
Ben laughed. “Okay, okay.”
By the time he hung up almost an hour later, he couldn’t help but feel even better about everything. Tina was as confident as his papá had been that eventually Eric would come around. She’d been ridiculously happy about it for him, and it did a lot to lift his mood. He’d felt even better when he could spend a good while teasing her about the new wolf in the pack out where she was going to school.
Even with the positive note the day ended on, Ben had a lot of trouble falling asleep. He couldn’t believe it’d been less than twenty-four hours since he’d arrived in Pittsburgh. He was trying to absorb the simple fact that he had a mate. A destined mate. Despite talking to him, touching him, it seemed impossible. Maybe Ben would wake up and find himself still in the hotel room in Louisville.
Gods, he hoped not. Eric had problems, that was true, but who didn’t? Ben had plenty of his own issues to work through.
Like his set of beliefs. He had long since recognized he didn’t believe in his mamá’s god. It was going to be awfully difficult to question his papá’s gods, though, after what he’d heard from his mate. If he believed what Eric saw, he had to accept it, and there was no reason for Ben to think Eric lied. He hadn’t heard anything in Eric’s voice and there’d been nothing in his scent, no indication of it in any way. So Eric, at least, believed wholeheartedly in what he’d seen.
And Ben couldn’t deny a goddess his own mate had seen, could he?
There were other species, so many things he’d learned, and Ben’s head spun with all of it. It wasn’t until he took a deep breath, focusing on the remnants of his mate’s scent still in the room, that he managed to settle down enough to go to sleep.
“SO, BEN’S agreed to go with me to do some clothes shopping. I still don’t, uh, know what to pay for it with, but if you guys could lend me enough to buy a set of clothes and maybe some underwear—” Eric smirked at Ben, who grinned. “—I’ll find a way to pay it back.”
Finley rolled his eyes but didn’t say anything at first, simply took a sip of his coffee.
Eric frowned, and Ben wished he could do something to take a lot of this burden off his mate. If they wer
e mated, there would be no issue with money. What was Ben’s would be Eric’s.
Ben was sure, however, that Eric wasn’t ready for anything like that. He did understand Eric’s need to earn his own money. He’d been insistent on the same thing with his parents for the last few years. But with the current state he was in, Eric was in no place to work yet.
A moment later Tanner came into the dining room and set a piece of paper in front of Eric. Ben guessed Finley had said something over their telepathic link.
“What’s this?” Eric asked, looking down at the paper.
“When you left, Dad immediately went in and locked your money up. I guess he didn’t trust Kim or your parents with it.”
“But, uh, when I left, I had, like… maybe $5K saved up. This is… a hell of a lot more.”
Tanner grinned. “Dad knew what he was about when it came to money. The pack isn’t just financially sound because of the shop.”
Eric blinked at Tanner, then back down at the paper. “Are you telling me he invested it?”
“That’s exactly what I’m saying. He was mostly safe with it, but he was also insistent that you have something to work from if you ever came back.”
“Well, shit,” Eric whispered. He looked over at Ben, then slid the paper to him.
“You do not have to show me, cariño.”
“You’re my mate. You should know.” Eric shrugged a shoulder. “Besides, you’re an accountant, right?”
Ben nodded. “Yes.”
“Well, then. You can figure out how to handle all that.” Eric nodded toward the paper.
That’s when Ben looked down at it. He shouldn’t have taken a sip of his coffee, because he nearly choked on it. As it was, he barely managed to keep from spraying it all over the paper. “Whoa.” Not very eloquent, maybe, but he thought it appropriate.
Eric laughed. “That’s about the size of it.”
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