Eye Contact
Page 33
“It’s okay, Mrs. Fine—Ms. Hattie isn’t hard to please. She’s just thrilled to finally be meeting you.”
“Nonsense. First impressions are everything. Also, if you don’t stop calling me Mrs. Fine, I’m going to have to hurt you,” she joked. “For the trillionth time, I insist you call me Kathy.”
I rested my hand on Vaughn’s thigh, reassuring him with a light squeeze and a smile.
The first time she had met Vaughn, it was at her house. She cooked a meal that was a tad overboard, flexing her culinary muscles in true Kathy Fine fashion. Vaughn made a great first impression and was extremely candid and honest with her when she asked the typical getting-to-know-you questions. Essentially his entire life story was aired that evening, with me even learning more about him I hadn’t yet known. The degree of my mom’s understanding and acceptance surprised me, and she whole-heartedly approved of him.
I didn’t know where we would end up after Eva. We loved each other, but what should’ve been a solid foundation was anything but. Somehow, we had been able to turn the visceral pain of a devastating tragedy into a stronger and more unshakable bond. What could’ve easily been a corrosive situation turned us toward one another instead of pulling us apart. Vaughn had been both my rock and my soft landing during and after I gave birth. I loved him, and I also liked him. I respected him. It was jarring and inspiring how two such flawed people could seem so flawless together. I was loyal to him and committed to us, whatever that may be.
Just as he was pulling me to lean into him, I was startled by the doorbell. He jumped up and opened the door for Ms. Hattie to enter, giving her a tight hug as he led her inside. I rose to also hug her, loving the subtle smell of the perfume on her neck.
“Mom, this is Ms. Hattie.”
Hattie’s smile lit up the room and she blazed right past the hand my mother had extended to bring her into a full embrace.
“It’s so nice to meet you, Kathy. You’re just as I pictured.”
My mom’s face was surprised but welcoming. “You too!” she agreed joyfully. “I love that blouse.”
They exchanged pleasantries and chitchatted, Vaughn and I finding each other’s eyes across the room with adoration. Our moms liked each other, which was a relief, and so enjoyable to witness.
After a few minutes of small talk, we all had a seat on my sectional sofa, the cheese board being devoured by all of us over flowing conversation. It was smooth, cordial, and easy…until my mom asked about Ms. Hattie’s other foster children.
“Was Vaughn your only foster or did you have others?”
“I had a brother—have a brother, not biological, but yeah…anyway,” Vaughn offered, fumbling his words.
“Oh, that’s wonderful. Are you all still close?”
There was an awkward pause from Vaughn, his eyes cutting over to Ms. Hattie with bitterness before he answered.
“We used to be. We’ve grown apart in recent years,” he admitted with regret.
“Matt has had a rough go the last few years,” Ms. Hattie chimed in, earning a sharp glare from Vaughn. “He’s working through some issues.”
“Is he? Working through them?” Vaughn chided. “Last I heard he wasn’t doing any of the work.”
I momentarily distracted my mom from the tension by asking if she needed more to drink and she got the hint, engaging in a soft side conversation with me so Vaughn and Hattie could have a modicum of privacy even though we were still right there in the room. When our exchange came to a pause, I heard Ms. Hattie in the middle of explaining Matt’s latest status.
“He’s working through the steps, going to meetings almost every day.”
“He must not have made it to step nine yet,” Vaughn said, clearly fuming.
“He’ll get there. Try to show a little grace and be patient. He’s been sober for almost a year now. He’ll make amends when he’s ready.”
I hated for Vaughn to hold such bitterness in his heart, but I somehow knew in my soul that he and Matt would be okay one day. They both had a lot to work through, and obviously Matt was dealing with some addiction and/or alcoholism to complicate matters even more. It was never something Vaughn talked to me about, at least not easily and freely. The more I learned, piece by piece, the more jumbled the circumstances seemed.
The room fell silent, all of us regrouping and collectively taking a sip from our respective beverages. A moment later I heard the distinct slam of metal outside my door, indicating that my mail had just been delivered. One of my favorite things about my old restored home was that I had my own metal mailbox right outside my front door and we had a sweet mail carrier who walked the neighborhood and hand-delivered the mail.
Vaughn saw that I noticed and got up to go retrieve it for me. When he returned, he had a contemplative look on his face as he handed me a handwritten card. It seemed like all I ever got in the mail anymore was the occasional bill that still came with paper statements and junk, but this appeared to be a greeting card, and it was addressed to me. The return address was stamped on but didn’t include a name. I couldn’t stop my hands from immediately tearing it open, my curiosity winning out over my desire to not appear rude to my guests. When I opened the card, three photographs fell out, all of a little boy who appeared to be about two or three years old. The card was covered with writing on both sides.
Dear Dr. Andie Fine,
I’ve wanted to send you this letter for a while now but battled with the need to respectfully give you time to grieve and heal. My name is Lindsey Nelson and the pictures I’ve enclosed are of my son. His name is Fletcher and he is almost two years old. He is my sweet, happy, healthy boy and is only here because of you.
I can’t imagine what it feels like to lose a child. When I was told Fletcher had a congenital heart defect that threatened his life, I was overwhelmed with fear. We had quite a few scares before the news of a potential donor came to us. My husband and I were torn between the sadness of knowing someone else’s child was going to die and knowing our beloved boy was going to be given another chance.
Because of your bravery and selfless decision, our son is thriving. He is running, jumping, and even learning to swim already. He loves the water more than anything. He never stops talking and is so beautifully smart. I needed you to see his face. I needed you to see what a difference you have made. While I’m absolutely terrified of this letter potentially not being welcomed or well received, I needed to try.
Your sweet angel baby gave my son her heart valves and therefore gave him life. Her heart lives on in my son’s and I promise to do my very best as a mother to make sure he does her justice. I commit to raising him to be a good person, a giving person, a loving person. I only hope and pray that it’s enough. We can never repay you but I want you to know how much of an impact your precious child made in the short time she was here. I want you to look into his eyes and see her spirit within him, living loudly and proudly. The light he brings with him wherever he goes is tangible and real.
If you ever want to meet Fletcher in person, we would be honored. Please don’t hesitate to contact me, and I will stop at nothing to make it happen. We live in Baton Rouge, Louisiana, and would love to visit Florida any time.
The only other thing I can say is thank you. I know it was a difficult decision for you to make and I’m amazed at the strength it must have taken to endure your entire pregnancy. You are truly my hero and we exalt Eva and magnify her spirit every day of our life with Fletcher. Each and every day is a gift, one we don’t take for granted.
Ralph Waldo Emerson once said, “It is not length of life, but depth of life.” Eva is a perfect example of that, and my husband and I are beyond appreciative of her and of you.
~Lindsey Nelson
The tears were streaming down my face like a dam had burst within me, a flood of emotion assaulting me as I read the words aloud. I was so engulfed in the letter I hadn’t noticed that Vaughn, my mom, and Ms. Hattie had all come to huddle around me, their own sniffling becoming appare
nt as I finished reading Lindsey’s card. What a powerful testimony of the entire situation coming full circle. I brought the photographs out from underneath her card to do as she’d requested. I looked into the darling boy’s eyes and saw everything she had described and more. I saw exactly what I needed to see—life, such a vibrant and intense light behind those gorgeous amber eyes. I saw purpose and I felt closure. I wanted nothing more than to meet this boy one day soon and was grateful for his mother having the courage and determination to contact me.
The four of us stood in a circle, Vaughn bringing me into his arms and fusing me into a tight hug. My mom and Hattie surrounded us with a soft and comforting embrace of acceptance and love, such love. I felt justified and truly at peace with everything that had happened, and I felt truly hopeful for the future.
The End
Author’s Note
This book is a work of fiction but deals with heavier subject matter in the plot. The topic of organ donation, especially in this particular scenario is controversial and meant to be dealt with on an individual case basis. My story and how these particular characters chose to deal with their circumstance is unique and isn’t meant to sway anyone’s views or judge those who may decide a different course of action. It is simply part of a story. My hope is that it will be thought provoking and at the very least, promote compassion and empathy for anyone who may find themselves in a similar situation to Andie’s and/or Vaughn’s.
If you are interested in learning more about becoming an organ donor, I encourage you to visit https://organdonor.gov/index.html for information and instructions on organ donor registration.
"Organ donation is not a tragedy but it can be a beautiful light in the midst of one."
-Author Unknown
“Don’t think of organ donations as giving up a part of yourself to keep a total stranger alive. It’s really a total stranger giving up almost all of themselves to keep part of you alive.”
-Author Unknown
“Without the organ donor, there is no story, no hope, no transplant. But when there is an organ donor, life springs from death, sorrow turns to hope, and a terrible loss becomes a gift.”
-UNOS
Acknowledgements
I have an obnoxious amount of people to thank for contributing to the making of this book but each of them played a pivotal role in getting this story into your hands. Simply listing their names in my acknowledgments doesn’t quite do it justice but hopefully they all know just how much they mean to me.
First and foremost, I must express appreciation to my husband and daughter. Stacy, you are the most patient and understanding person I have ever met. Writing a novel is demanding and stressful but you relentlessly encouraged me to keep going, dropped everything to help me with whatever I.T. issue I was too idiotic and impatient to try to troubleshoot myself, and definitely picked up the slack in our home when it was crunch time. I love you and appreciate you more than you can possibly know. Leah, thank you for always showing your excitement for me to write stories. It is awesome to hear your questions and plot suggestions and I can’t wait until you are old enough to read my work.
Mom, your unconditional love and support is immeasurable and so appreciated. And your proofreading is top notch. I feel sorry for people that don’t have a mother like you.
To my amazing beta readers, you ALL deserve a standing ovation. Each of you brought a unique perspective and differing opinions as this story evolved and it wouldn’t be anything close to the end result without your guidance. Laurie Darter, Christine Kuttnauer, Rachel Schneider, Teagan Hunter, M.E. Carter, Tera Schumacher, Erin Burke, Daphne Grice, Lindsey Gifford, Megan Kapusta, and Charrell Thomas, I love and appreciate you all.
Caitlin with Editing by C. Marie, you are fantastic! My manuscript was escalated to the next level because of your thorough and brilliant editing skills. Your corrections made me a better writer. It was a pleasure to work with you and I look forward to a long standing professional relationship and friendship in the future.
Kristina Maor, one of my favorite people: thank you for always being so willing to help me. Your photography is beautiful and as long as you continue to say yes to doing exclusive photo shoots for me, I will continue to ask. Jenny Harper and Josh Veres, you both are incredible people inside and out. But I especially appreciate your attractiveness and you both being willing to let me borrow it for use on my cover, teasers, and promotional materials. You truly brought Andie and Vaughn to life and I couldn’t ask for better muses.
Murphy Rae, thank you for your friendship, advice, and talent. I am obsessed with this cover and I’m so grateful for your patience during all of the revisions and tweaks to get it just right. Indie Solutions by Murphy Rae is unbelievable and worth every penny.
I also need to give a special shout out to Teagan Hunter, M.E. Carter, and Sara Ney. You all are never hesitant or stingy with sharing things that have worked for you and what hasn’t been as successful. Teagan, you know how I love you so. Your willingness to give advice with writing, promo, and graphic design opinions was awesome. Sara, your brand and your ability to market yourself is so admired and I appreciate your guidance and your tag line help. Also, I love your eyebrows and miss your face. M.E., you always go above and beyond to help me and I might possibly hug you so hard that I fracture a rib. Be advised. At least a broken rib wouldn’t be as bad as being pregnant again.
To my proofreaders, Brandy Palmer, Terri Marcum, Callie Vestal, Amelie Vahle, and Annette MacDowell. Thank you all for dropping everything to take one last look at the manuscript under an unreasonable deadline to catch the little typos that I never would’ve seen in a million years. You all are impressive and amazing.
Deb Palmer, my personal notary extraordinaire, I love you so much. I’m seriously going to get better at giving you more notice. I promise.
Dr. Francisco Gaudier (the real Kiko), Dr. Edgard Ramos-Santos, and my favorite sonographer ever- Connie Hreha, thank you for so eagerly and graciously answering all of my obstetrical questions. I only hope I was able to bring my character’s tragedy to life in a factually accurate and empathetic way.
Dr. Charrell Thomas, if only I could pay you what you well deserve for your medical consultation and fact checking. Sigh, maybe one day. I am blessed to know you and be able to call you my friend. Thank you a million times over, for everything.
Dr. David Baxendale, you’ve always been so encouraging of me putting myself out there to do this and this adventure was no different. Your medical expertise was so helpful and I hope I did these trauma scenes justice.
Chris Booras and Maxine Smith, you both are fantastic at what you do and I’m thankful you were able to clear up my R.T. confusion. Way to help me come correct.
Thank you to David Redfearn for your legal advice and courtroom terminology expertise. I hope I never need your services.
There are a few groups that are a source of great friendships and entertainment while also being constant saving graces for me. B.S., you all have to know how much you mean to me. You assholes complete me and I can’t thank you enough. W.G.T.S. (Kimmi, Megan, D.B., Hilaria, Jodie, Alexandria, and Linda), I am honored to be able to call you girls my tribe. It’s invaluable to be able to have people in your exact shoes to bounce ideas off of, learn from, and lean on when you need it. Manuscript Minxes, I have learned so much from you girls and love our safe place. Thank you all so much for everything. The PLN Authors Group and The Alessandra Torre Inkers, you are all amazing. I’m thrilled to be able to learn from one another, grow as artists, and support each other along the way.
Colleen Hoover, you are my hero. I’ve learned so much from you and I’m honored to be able to call you a friend. Amy Harmon, you are my hero. Oh, wait. I told Colleen the same thing.
is industry and are ridiculously generous in showing grace, giving advice, and being great friends to me.
Pamela Carrion, I cannot possibly say enough about you or to you to come close to what you deserve as far as gratitude. I love you so much and I’m beyond indebted to you for all that you do for me. I only wish we lived closer so I could give you the intense bear hugs that you deserve more often.
To all of the Totaled Nutz that not only enthusiastically show love and support for my art, but return day after day, interacting consistently in my reader/fan group. Always hilarious, entertaining, and responsive. I love you all THE MOST! I’m so fortunate to be in this author community but to my core, I am, was, and will always be a reader. I know what it’s like to fan girl and admire an author and I can’t even believe I’m sometimes on the receiving end of that. Ever. You all are amazing and make it all worth it.
About the Author
Stacey Grice writes contemporary romance novels that will surely take you on an emotional roller coaster. Known for her dynamic characters, you’ll get a tale that’s raw and unapologetic. There will most always be angst mixed with sweet, humor balanced with grit, and a whole lot of REAL. She likes to take each reader on a journey of courtship with challenges, triumph, inspiration, and a few laughs as well.
She lives in Northeast Florida her husband and daughter and works full time as a Labor and Delivery nurse. When she’s not nursing and/or crafting stories, she can be found spending time with friends and family, people watching, enjoying great food, and reading or relaxing at her happy place—the beach.
Stacey is the author of two other books, Totaled and Tapped. To find out more about Stacey and her books, be sure to follow her on social media at the following places.