by Curd, Megan
“Well, I’m just going to go fix that uh, thing I have out in the uh, garage. You know what I’m talking about, right Hannah?”
Hannah mumbled unintelligibly, but it was probably something along the lines of begging Mr. Gordon to leave. I didn’t blame her.
“Yeah, I’m gonna be going now. Things to fix, you know,” he nodded once more to me, as if to acknowledge the gift he was giving me. I nodded my thanks back. He smiled and left the room.
I pushed Hannah an arms length away from me to look in her eyes. “Hannah, what was he doing here?”
“Nothing,” she dodged defensively. “He was just coming over to see what I was up to is all.”
I snorted. “Right. He just wanted to see how the paint on your walls was drying, that’s it.”
“Look, Levi, it doesn’t matter why he was over here. You were pretty wrapped up in Reina earlier, weren’t you?”
“No, not really. Reina is on some kick that involves apparently ‘learning’ about me, according to her. Nothing is going to happen with her. I want you.”
Tears wound their way down Hannah’s eyes. It was painful to see how much she was hurting. I held her close to me again. “What can I do to fix this?”
“Nothing. Everything’s changed, hasn’t it? Things will never be the same. You’ve come into my life and turned it upside down.”
“I’m taking that as a bad thing.”
She laughed, but it was shaky. “Well, before you I didn’t have strange, otherworldly things coming after me and trying to kill me. I didn’t have a death sentence looming over my head. Those aren’t exactly nice things.”
“You’re right, they’re not,” I agreed, “But you have me, and I swear I will keep all of those things at bay, so help me God.”
“I really hope that’s the case,” she stated. Her eyes were puffy from all the crying she’d done since last night. Everything was my fault. How was I supposed to fix this mess?
“Do you want to go upstairs? We can watch a movie or something,” I asked, trying to find some way to make her happy.
“No, I want you to tell me everything today.”
“Everything?”
She bit her lip for a moment, then nodded slowly. “Yes, everything. I want to trust you. Angie says I should, so I will.”
That was music to my ears. I smiled weakly, then scooped her up in my arms. “Well, if Angie told you to do it, you’d better do it.”
“I know,” she laughed as we flew up the stairs to her bedroom, “When Angie doesn’t get her way, all hell breaks loose.”
I didn’t want to tell her that was going to happen no matter what anyway.
TWENTY
We sat down on her bed and she played with the hole in her comforter. For a moment, I watched her fiddle with the strings, braiding them and then untangling them, only to braid them again. She fidgeted more than usual, which meant she was nervous. “You know I’m not a mass murderer, Hannah.”
She looked at me sideways, all the while still playing with the strings. “Do I?”
The sincerity of the question bit into me more than it should have. She had a right to be nervous. I took her hand. “Are you sure you want to know everything?”
Her eyes locked onto mine, and her steely resolve was evident. She put her hand on top of mine and traced the veins along the back. “Positive. I want to be there for you. I want to understand. You’re my Guardian. I trust you.”
The words reassured me, but all the while, I still needed to know she wouldn’t judge me before the story was finished. My stomach felt like it was in my throat. “Then I need you to listen to everything before you judge, okay?”
She closed her eyes for a moment, took a deep breath, and then sighed as she squeezed my hand tight. When she opened her eyes, she smiled. “I can do that.”
“Good. Well then, here it goes. It was 1910 when I was sixteen. Things were changing at the time. World War I was in full swing. America was coming into its own power. It was a different time. Women were striving for equality, and my mother was one of those women.
My father, on the other hand, was a firm believer that women had no business ever moving up. ‘Why should they need to?’ He’d ask. His ideals made me sick. When he coupled them with his drinking habit, he’d take it out on my mother. It was more than I could bear.
There were many nights he’d come home in a drunken rage, blaming everything on her. From a young age, she’d hide me and keep me out of his reach. One night I’d had enough. He wasn’t going to lay a hand on my mother again.
I stayed out of view when my father arrived home, but it became evident he was going to hurt my mother. I came out of my bedroom wielding a knife and threatened him. He laughed and spit in my face. He broke his empty bottle over our kitchen table and came after me with it, all the while my mother screaming for him to stop. Of course he didn’t listen to her.
I hadn’t intended on killing him. I hadn’t even intended on hurting him. My only goal was to scare him away long enough to get my mother somewhere safe. You see, I’d been saving up my wages and had found a small apartment we could live in. I was willing to do that for my mother. That’s all I wanted. However, my father was so livid, he started beating me with the broken bottle. I tried to run away, but he grabbed me from behind.
When I tried to fight him off, he spun me toward him. It was too fast; there was no way to move the knife. He actually pulled me to him so fast that I accidentally stabbed him. He fell to the ground, bleeding. I panicked. My mother was screaming for someone to help. I kneeled down and tried to figure out how to save him. That’s when he stabbed me.”
When I stopped, Hannah’s eyes were as wide as saucers. Her mouth was agape. I felt bad for telling her this horrible story. Of course it would change her forever. She hadn’t dealt with such terrible things in her life. Who was I to bring this on her now? She sputtered for a moment, then got her bearings. “So, you accidentally killed him, but he killed you on purpose?”
I shrugged. “Pretty much. My mother never recovered. She lost both men in her life that night. I never left her side after that. She was my first Call.”
“What happened?” Hannah whispered.
“She lived a relatively long life for the time,” I said. “She was never the same after that, though. Never let anyone else in. I felt horrible. I had been trying to save her. In the end, I only caused her more pain. It seems I always cause the people I love the most pain.”
Hannah let out a sob, then pulled me into her arms. “I am so sorry, Levi. I didn’t know. I’m so sorry.”
Why was she comforting me? Shouldn’t she be repulsed? She was before. Why did any of this change things now that she knew the whole story? “I murdered my father, Hannah.”
She pulled away from me, tears still streaming from her face. “But you didn’t mean to.”
“But it still happened.”
“You were doing it to protect your mom.”
“That doesn’t make it right.”
Hannah laughed weakly. “Why are you trying to make me think you’re a bad person? Do you not want me to care about you?”
“It’s not that at all. It’s just yesterday you were so against it and now – ”
“And now I know the whole story. How can I be mad at you for that? You deserve to transition up. You died in defense of your mother. Maybe you weren’t thinking about all the things that could happen, but you were trying to take care of her. That deserves a second chance.”
Her words struck home. My heart felt whole for the first time since that horrible night in 1910. The crushing relief that came with her words of affirmation overflowed within me. I did the first thing that came to mind.
I kissed Hannah.
There was no time for her to think or to argue. I took her in my arms and pulled her close, crushing my lips to hers. She melted into me, her lips moving in time with mine. Her hands ran down my back. Without thinking, I unfurled my wings and wrapped us in them. We fell backward on
to the bed, her on top of me. I ran my hand through her hair that fell around my face. Her hands were on my chest. Not for a second did she pull away.
The heat that emanated from the both of us was like a fire. It was unquenchable. Instead, it seemed to build the longer we embraced one another. It was amazing. I was short of breath. Finally Hannah pulled away for a moment to breathe. Her smile blew me away. “You’re amazing, Levi.”
Hannah found a way to reach my soul after over ninety years of it being hardened. I was truly coming back from the dead. The feeling of completeness overtook me. Once more I pulled her close to me and kissed her. “I owe you my soul,” I murmured between kisses.
“I owe you my life, so we’re even,” she said.
Being in debt never felt so good as it did with her in my arms.
TWENTY-ONE
The morning peeked through her curtains much too early for my taste. Sleeping wasn’t really an option for a Guardian, so all night I held Hannah in my arms and surrounded us with my silver wings. They were still strange to me, but even those couldn’t deter my gaze from her. She was amazing. When the light broke, I adjusted my wings to keep the rays out of her face.
She readjusted within my embrace and opened her eyes. Immediately she smiled. “Hey you,” she whispered.
“Hey you right back. Did you sleep okay?”
Arms outstretched, she yawned and pushed herself into a sitting position. “Yeah, I did. Thanks for staying.”
“Any time.”
My mind wandered to Reina without even thinking about it. What would she do if I didn’t come back? Would she be mad? I wasn’t sure. She seemed to understand I wanted things to work with Hannah, and she was a Guardian. I had to trust in her. There was no way to avoid her forever, but if I could at least stave off the reunion, it’d be a minor win in my book. The girl was a little strange, in my opinion.
Hannah must have been talking, because she stopped and looked at me funny. “You in there?”
“What? Yeah, sorry. Just thinking.”
“About what?”
I couldn’t stop myself. “Reina.”
Hannah’s body tensed. Her face was stone, but her eyes were mutinous. It was the ‘woman death stare’ that Ethan had told me about so many times. “I see.”
“Not like that! She’s, well, she’s really odd now that I’ve talked to her. I’m actually a little scared of her, to be honest.”
With that, Hannah’s body loosened, but not completely. She laughed, or at least tried to. “Well, I could have told you that.”
“She bought a house on the edge of town. I’m supposed to stay with her and find out what makes you so diff – ” I cut myself off mid-sentence.
Her eyes narrowed. “Makes me so what?”
“Nothing. I don’t know enough to really say much.”
“That’s crap. What do you know?”
Reina was right; I had an unhealthy inability to keep anything from Hannah. I sighed and tried to give her enough, yet leave out most of the things that would cause her to freak out. “You’re different, but you already knew that.”
“No, not exactly,” she crossed her arms and stared me down. The girl always won. Why did she always have to win?
“Well obviously you’re different. You were attacked by a Fallen. You nearly transitioned. You avoided your time to die. That makes you slightly unusual, don’t you think?” I smiled at her. Sometimes I wondered if she just wanted to have things repeated.
She toyed with the hole in her comforter once again. It was the thing she always went to when she was thinking. If she had to think much more often, there wouldn’t be anything left of her comforter.
“Look,” I said as I took her hands and held them still, “I’ve been trying to figure out why the Fallen are so bent on you. It’s not normally like that.”
“Have you found anything out?”
“Well, kind of, but not enough to really want to elaborate on it right now. There’s too much I don’t understand, which is why I’m trying to work with Reina. She knows more than she wants to tell me. Ethan is poking around to find things out, too. Just give me time to figure out what’s going on first, okay?”
I could tell she didn’t want to give it up, but before she could protest, I kissed her again. She sighed and wrapped her arms around my neck. I felt her hands run through my hair, and I held her closer still. It was impossible to get close enough to her. She had me hook, line, and sinker.
She pulled away to sigh. “There’s still school today. It’s Friday, you know.”
“I know. At least it’s a three-day weekend. Then next weekend is homecoming,” I added, trying to be smooth about bringing up the subject.
“You’re right,” was all she offered.
I sighed and got off the bed. “I should let you get ready for school. I’ll see you in English first period, then?”
She rolled her eyes and smiled. “See you then.”
There was no way I was going to fall into her game that easy. We both knew what homecoming meant, but I wanted to hold out a little bit before asking her. I slid open her window and grabbed my hoodie off the chair beside it. Stepping out into the air, I let myself drop a few feet before flying off.
It was hard not to feel a little bit of excitement, even with things still shrouded in mystery. Hannah and I were together. That had to count for something. I smiled to myself as I turned over on my back and just enjoyed actually feeling the sun’s rays.
A hand clenched my ankle and pulled me from cloud nine by yanking me toward the earth. I didn’t turn to face whatever demon had come to steal my one sliver of normalcy. Instead, I just kicked him straight in the face with my free foot.
“Good God, man! That’s the last time I ever do anything nice for you. I think you broke my nose.”
I sighed. “Ethan, are you really that thick, or do you just have a death wish?”
After everything else that had gone on the past few days, most intelligent people would have known better than to sneak up on me, but not Ethan. Even with blood pouring out of his nose, he still managed to grin. “You’re such a twitchy one. No boogey men today, just me.”
“You’d count for one.”
He rolled his eyes as we landed in the field behind the high school. “Hey, like I said, don’t send me on little reconnaissance missions if you don’t want me to get my kicks by scaring the crap out of you. Anyway, I did some digging. You interested, or not?”
“Depends on what you found out. Good or bad?”
“Depends on what you think is good and bad. I believe this falls under ‘juicy’ no matter what.”
“What’d you find out?”
Ethan cleared his throat, then looked around like he was genuinely afraid. That was a first for him. “Look, it turns out Reina isn’t always the cleanest cut of the Guardians. You’d be better off finding someone else to help you out. Not that she’s bad, it’s just that, well, let’s just say she hangs with more Guards than just us,” he motioned with his finger between the two of us. “But what I found out was this: Hannah is a pure soul. I didn’t even know those were real. Do you know how much trouble you’re in for keeping a pure soul past their passing date? The fellas downstairs aren’t too happy with you.”
So the news had spread of Hannah’s category. This wasn’t looking promising. I nodded, trying to get Ethan to continue.
“Well, like I was saying. People are pretty pissed that you’ve turned the tide on them. There’s talk that they’re going to do some dirty work to even the playing field again.”
“How do you mean?”
Ethan shrugged. “I have no clue, man. From what I’ve heard, though, nothing is past them. You’re gonna be hard pressed to keep Hannah safe if they’re going to get involved. You’re going to need a lot of help.”
My heart dropped. “Help that you can’t provide?”
Ethan turned white. “Look, I’m here to help, no doubt. But last I heard, they’re talking about sending Hunters.”
My whole body went cold. “Hunters?”
“It’s that serious, my friend. You need to talk to a Guardian who’s dealt with those things. We’ve only heard stories.”
I nodded. “You know any Guardians we can trust with all of this?”
“You mean that won’t kill us on the spot for telling them?”
“That’d be a good idea.”
Ethan ran his hands through his hair, obviously flustered. “Dude, the only one that comes to mind is Owen’s dad, but I don’t know where he is. Plus, asking Owen would mean I was dead meat.”
“Owen’s dad is Guardian?”
Ethan grinned sarcastically. “Yeah, a little bit of a night and day, huh? That’s why Owen’s all salty about being a Guard. He messed up in life. Can’t even see his dad now. I guess they were pretty close before everything, but that’s all I know. Anyway, the only way you’re getting that info is if you ask him yourself. He has to answer to a transitioner, even if it’s you.”
“So what are you proposing? That I just stroll up to Owen and be like, ‘Hey buddy, where’s your old man nowadays?’ You just said I’m not a popular guy. Plus, don’t you remember Owen trying to get us to stay out of it in the first place? He tried to help us. I can’t imagine he’s going to be too sympathetic to our cause now.”
Ethan laughed. “No, you’re not too popular, but Owen is still technically your superior until you’re a Guardian. You know he comes around every few weeks. I can request that he come, then you can just conveniently be in the area.”
“That has so many things wrong with it. It’s a death wish.”
“Yeah, well, why don’t you come up with a better idea?”
He had a point. There wasn’t much we could do besides do a bait and switch like he was talking about. I shuddered, my thoughts once again going to Reina. Why was she such a force? “What am I supposed to do with Reina until then?”
“Avoid her like the plague, I guess. Doesn’t seem right to avoid someone that good looking, but you always were weird,” Ethan said, grinning slyly.