JAX IS STILL ASLEEP. I decide to make a cup of tea and watch the sunrise over Central Park. It has such a calming effect. The baby is so active now; it feels like I’m growing bigger by the minute. I think Jax is right, escaping down to the island might be just what we need right now. I’m more worried about Jackie and my mom. If Vincent finds out my mom is alive, he’ll come after her. I have no doubt about his sick obsession with her. Max has aged through all of this, and now his fear for Jackie’s safety has brought all his pain to the surface again. I’m trying not to blame myself for any of this, but sometimes it’s hard not too.
Staring out at the sunrise, I realize I’m ready to watch the video, I’ve put it off long enough. Mom is right; my daddy will always be on that pedestal and nothing will ever change that. I get Jax’s laptop and plug in the flash drive. I close my eyes, take a deep breath, and hit play. The screen fills with my daddy in his hospital bed.
“Cara, my beautiful angel. The day you were born, my life changed forever. I finally understood unconditional love. I’m so sorry you were touched by all of this evil. Nothing that happened was your fault. You defended yourself exactly as I taught you to. Vincent just got the better of us; never blame yourself. You’re strong, my beautiful girl. I might not be there to watch you grow into the beautiful woman I know you will be, but my heart will always be joined with yours. You take hold of your mom and don’t let go. Joseph will always be there to catch you, if you fall. Live your life to the fullest and love with all your heart. You’re Daddy’s ray of sunshine, Cara, the best thing I have ever done in my life was help to create you.
Daddy loves you, Cara, always.”
The screen goes black, and I’m frozen. All of the memories that I have kept buried so deep from that awful day come racing to the surface. I can feel him pulling my hair. I can feel the cold steel knife scraping up and down my neck every time Vincent laughs. He’s yelling at Daddy, and Joseph. I’m trying to be a big girl, but I’m scared and I cry. He yells at me to shut up, and presses the knife harder against my throat. He’s dragging me by my ponytail, waving that knife around. Everyone is yelling: Vincent, Joseph, and Daddy. Then Daddy gives me the sign, that it’s time to protect myself just like he taught me. I run it through my head, the mantra he would tell me whenever I was afraid. “Kick, bite, run, Cara, always remember that.” Kick, bite, and run. Kick, bite, and run. I can do this. I kick him in the shin, bite his hand with the knife, and try to run towards Daddy. I did it just like Daddy taught me, but then Joseph leaps and all I hear are gunshots. All I smell is gunpowder and the metallic smell of blood. I’m rocking in my daddy’s arms, crying, “Please don’t die, Daddy, please don’t die.”
I OPEN MY EYES to find the other half of the bed empty. I know she can’t sleep through the night without going to the bathroom—the joys of pregnancy I guess. As I head towards the kitchen to make coffee, I hear her crying. I race into the office, and find her, in a ball on the floor. Obviously, she became sick because she’s covered in vomit. She’s rocking back and forth, crying, “Please don’t die Daddy, please don’t die.”
She finally watched the video that Antonio left her. It must have triggered the memories she’s been fighting to keep suppressed. I scoop her into my arms, and carry her into our bedroom. She’s shivering and I need to warm her up. I wrap us up in the comforter, holding and soothing her. “Raven, you’re safe, sweetheart. I’m here with you forever, baby. No one can get to us.” Finally the shaking stops. I pull her head up to mine. “Open your eyes, baby.” She opens her eyes; there’s my girl. “Hey, sweetheart, there you are. You’re safe, I’ve got you, always.”
“Jax, I watched the video my daddy left me. He loved me, and he didn’t blame me for anything that happened.”
“Of course he loved you, sweetheart, why would you think he would blame you for what happened?”
“He taught me to protect myself. He would say, ‘kick, bite, and run’ all the time. When he nodded to me I did it, only it didn’t work; Daddy was shot. I thought I didn’t do it right.”
I have to tell her I saw the tape, and I know she was not to blame. “I watched the tape, Raven. You were a very brave little girl. You did everything right. You can’t predict what will happen when you’re dealing with a madman.”
“You watched it? When?”
“Last night, when you were talking with Jackie. Max showed it to me. I needed to see it, to understand the depth of Vincent’s depravity. It’s another reason we are leaving for the island, sooner rather than later. Now that you’ve heard what your father said, maybe you can put your self-doubt behind you. We need to focus on the future with our growing family.”
“I’m a mess, I need to get cleaned up.”
“Let me help you, we’ll have a nice hot shower and then some of that wonderful porridge that you seem to like.”
“Okay, a shower would be wonderful and I do have some questions.”
Great, anything to get her mind off of all of this. I carry her into the bathroom and put her on the counter, while I turn the shower on. I turn on the IPod and choose her favorite David Garrett song, “Bring Me Back to Life.” The same one I played when we made our apple pie. It will relax and help sooth her. I lift her up and carry her into the shower, letting the hot water wash away all the angst. I slowly begin cleaning her up. She closes her eyes and let’s me take care of her.
“What do you want to know, Raven?”
“I want to go over the arrangements you have made for us.”
“Okay, but don’t flip out on me. I need to be my usual self right now. I need you to understand it’s for everyone’s safety, and my own sanity. Everything for the baby is set up. Dr. Leanne has agreed to come down two weeks before your due date. I hired a nurse to stay with us for the next four months. I had a small hospital built and staffed. The staff has been triple checked. I arranged for my personal shopper to come and fit you, Jackie, and your mom for all the clothes you will ever need. Mick will be coming, as well as Sammy. I let Jackie’s parents know everything that is going on, and when we will be leaving. Is there anything I missed?”
Oh dear God, she’s crying. What the fuck did I do now? “Sweetheart, please, what’s wrong?”
“I’m overwhelmed, Jax.”
“Don’t be, that’s what I’m here for. Let me handle all the details, and you just be you. The kindest, most loving person I’ve ever known.”
“I feel like I’ve disrupted everyone’s life and put them in danger. Michael was looking so forward to going to Disney World this summer.”
“Stop, just stop with the pity party. Junior will get his trip to Disney World, and I plan on surprising him with a very special trip in the fall to Cardiff Bay.”
“What’s in Cardiff Bay?”
HIS WHOLE FACE LIGHTS up like a kid on Christmas morning. “The Doctor Who Experience. Of course, we will take the baby with us.”
Oh my God, he’s serious. “Jax, the baby might be too young for that. Maybe it would be a good bonding trip for you and Michael.”
“Turn around, Raven, let me wash your hair.”
As he’s massaging my scalp all I can think about is how much I’m going to miss this shower. He rinses out the shampoo and now he’s working in the conditioner. I could get used to this really quickly. He’s rubbing my shoulders and leaving a trail of kisses down my spine.
“Jax, I’m really going to miss this shower.”
“No worries, sweetheart. I had the shower duplicated on the island. I would never deny my beautiful wife anything.”
Oh how I love my beautiful, crazy husband.
MAX’S GUEST ROOM IS nice, but I need a private place to work. I decide to go back to Jackie’s flat where I will have some privacy. I step into the hall and, as expected, Mick is sitting by the elevator, having his coffee. He’s always there, and always on time. “Hey, Mick, let Max and Jax know that I went to Jackie’s place to get some more of my stuff, and that I’ll be back. My understanding is no one is leaving this
flat until we head to the island. If something changes, please call me.”
“Sure, Sammy, I’ll let them know.”
I get to Jackie’s, and the first thing I do is update Gerhard. “Sir, Jax, has everyone on lockdown. No one is leaving the flat until the end of the week. Then they will be heading down to the island. Jackie has agreed to go with them. I’m going to arrange the transport for everyone.”
“Jax contacted me and advised me of his plans. Have the Fed’s decided what they are going to do with Vincent and Duke?”
“My contact said they are going to deal. They feel Vincent can give up some top level people.”
“What kind of deal are we talking here, Sammy?”
“They are going to go with diminished capacity for Duke, and give him a reduced sentence. As far as Vincent, they aren’t saying. I think it would depend on who he gives up.”
“Sam, that animal can’t get a deal, do you understand me?”
Oh, I get exactly what he’s telling me. “Understood, sir.”
“Did you get a list of all his dealings outside the United States?”
“Yes, sir. The list of his drug dealings, outside the United States, is quite extensive, along with his political connections. The Feds have got to know, if given the chance, he would flee. However, I think they’re looking at the big picture, how much of a dent they can put into the drug trade. There like roaches, they keep coming back, no matter how much the government cuts into their business.”
“Sammy, do you have any idea how quickly all of this is going to go down?”
“Not an exact timeframe, however, what I’m hearing is the Feds want this wrapped up pretty quickly. They’re afraid the more time that passes the more problems they will encounter. They know that Jax has a copy of the tape, and there is probably nothing they can do to get it back.”
“If that tape gets out—they will know Jax released it—then what?”
“They’d have to prove it, and Max had about a dozen different copies made. He stored them at various locations all over the world, including one at Scotland Yard. Apparently, he has a lot of friends in all the right places.”
“Let me know when my daughter is safely on that island, and give me a heads up on Vincent.”
I get what he’s not saying, the further away from this Jackie is, the more plausible deniability he has.
I hang up with Gerhard, and check in with Annabelle’s guard. Seems she has finally gotten in to see Vincent and Duke. Everything is going to move pretty quickly, now that the Feds have decided to deal. I need to convince everyone that they need to get to the island tomorrow, the latest. I have a few more arrangements to make before my team is in place. I get an alert that someone is looking into the Gerhard family, mainly pulling information on Jackie. They are following the breadcrumb trail I set, which is perfect. This will buy us a little bit more time, but we have to move quickly. There is only so long I can string whomever is looking along before they figure out it’s a dead end.
Time to call Max, and get the ball rolling. Fucking phone goes right to voice mail. “Max, I’m on my way back to the flat. Get Jax, I need to meet with everyone now. Be there in ten.
ANOTHER MORNING I’M UP before Max, which now has me worried. He’s always up before dawn. He has an iron grip on my leg and his other hand is fisted and shaking. He is in a pool of sweat. Maybe it’s a nightmare. If it is, I don’t want to startle him. I stroke his cheek and whisper, “Max, it’s okay. Everyone is fine. Please wake up, Max.”
His eyes fly open and he leaps up, nearly knocking me on my ass.
“Oh my God, baby, are you okay? I’m so sorry. Did I hurt you?”
“Calm down, Max. I’m fine, but clearly, you’re not. What is going on? And don’t tell me nothing.”
“Jackie, it’s just the headaches, that’s all.”
I watch him as he checks his messages and I see he’s still shaking. He might think I’m buying his excuse, but I’m not. Clearly, I’m not going to get anywhere with him on this.
“Sammy called, we need to get next door. The doctor called, she will be here at noon. Please stop worrying, Jackie, I’m fine.”
We get ready and head next door, but this is far from over.
WE ALL GATHER IN Jax’s flat. Rose has set up coffee for everyone. I know that we are all on edge right now, but not even Jax and Raven notice that something has been off with Max. Why am I the only one who sees it? I know we are all stressed and tired, but something is not right . . . I’m worried. Sammy comes rushing in and he seems very intense. Knowing him, as I do, this can’t be good.
“Hey, everyone, there has been a few developments overnight that I need to make everyone aware of. First of all, the Feds are going to offer Duke a deal. They’re offering him diminished capacity with life in prison. They are also going to offer Vincent a deal. However, they are not saying anything more until they find out what he is going to give them. Someone started looking into Jackie, but the only thing they got, right now, was the false trail I set up. I think we need to move to the Island today. I have transport and security already set up.”
I NEED TO MAKE a stand here. If this is what I need to do so Max will see something is wrong, then so be it. I stand up and all eyes turn towards me. “I’m not going anywhere, and before everyone starts yelling, please hear me out.” You could hear a pin drop. Well, at least I know everyone is listening. “So much has happened, in such a short amount of time. I’m a strong person and I can endure quite a lot. What I cannot—no—what I will not do is sit around while the man I love is in physical pain, and hiding it from everyone. Until Max gets his head examined—literally—I’m, not going anywhere.” No one is saying a word, however, all heads turn towards Max.
“Jackie, I assure you, I’m fine. It’s the headaches, but they are getting better.”
I roll up my pant leg, “Max, is this better? You gripped my leg so hard in your sleep that I’m bruised. You sleep past dawn; you never do that. You wake up in a cold sweat. You fist your hands in your sleep, and grind your teeth. None of this is normal. You get a complete checkup or I don’t leave.”
Before anyone can say another word, Jax leaps up and heads towards his gym. “I need a time out, please.”
Raven gets up to go after him, but Max stops her. “Raven, please, it’s me he’s mad at, right now. Let me handle him.”
I HEAD INTO THE gym. I see him beating on a bag, and I know it’s my face he’s seeing.
“Talk to me, Jax.”
“Talk to you? You’re the one who should be talking to me. Aren’t you the one who’s keeping secrets? What were you going to do, drop dead and leave me to clean up the bloody mess?”
“It’s not that bad, Jax.”
“Not that bad, did you see her leg? Did you see the fear in her eyes? Do you know what courage it must have taken for her to stand up in front of everyone, and put you before her own safety? Get your head out of your fucking arse, Max, or do I need to do it for you?! How fucking bad is it?”
“I thought it was the added stress.”
“Well, apparently, it’s not. I’m calling the doctor and getting him here now. You will do exactly what he tells you to do. Do you have any problems with that?”
“Okay. I will, but calm the fuck down.”
“If you tell me to calm down one more time, so help me, you know exactly what I’ll do!”
That shut him up real quick.
MY NEED TO BOLT has never been as strong as it is right now. My husband is on the verge of losing it. I can hear him screaming at Max. I would not want to be on the receiving end of his wrath right now. My best friend’s life is in danger. The man she loves has been shot twice because of me. I brought my mom back into all of this, and now I’m questioning that, too. I have a baby to protect, and I’m in a world of danger. My heart is racing and my head is pounding.
“Raven, are you feeling okay?”
“I have a headache, Mom.”
“When was the last time
you ate anything?”
“Mom, you’re starting to sound like Jax.” I feel bad I just snapped at her.
“Well, maybe you should listen to him more. I’m making you some chamomile tea.”
I pull Jackie into my arms, “He will be okay, and I’m not going anywhere without you.”
Suddenly, Jax and Max are back. Jax pulls Jackie out of my arms.
“Thank you, Jackie, you’re a very brave lady. The doctor will be here within the hour to examine, Max. No one gets left behind!” he says and he encircles me in his arms and squeezes me tight. “Raven, and I are going upstairs for some fresh air. Sammy, can you brief Max and Mick on the transport, please.”
We head up to the rooftop deck. The warm morning sun feels wonderful. Jax pulls me onto the lounge chair, and nestles me between his legs. “Talk to me, Jax, please.”
“I need the peace of mind, right now, that only you can give me.” He kisses the top of my head and takes in a deep breath. “Dr. Leanne, will be here soon to examine Jackie. I would like her to take a look at you again before we leave.”
“Max told you about the condom but not about his head?”
“Yeah, go figure. I honestly don’t know what the hell he was thinking.”
“Jax, what’s really bothering you? Don’t look at me like that, I know there’s more.”
He’s twirling a lock of my hair around his finger, not saying a word.
“What kind of person does it make me that I didn’t even notice my best friend is in pain?”
“You can’t blame yourself; you’re juggling so many different things.”
“I can’t afford to let anything fall between the cracks, there are too many lives at stake.”
“We’ll get there, Jax, to the other side of all this madness. I promise you, we will.”
Darkness into Dawn (The Unraveled Trilogy Book 2) Page 28