Southern Spice (Southern Desires Series Book 1)

by Jeannette Winters

  Sitting in his F350, he used his phone to respond to his business emails. There was a big business opportunity. It would require him to be back in New York tonight. He would need to leave shortly if he was going to make the four-hour flight. Maybe that is what is best for both of us. She needs to concentrate on work, and I need to get my head back in the game and out of my ass. I’ve already spent too much time on the ranch. Too much time with her.

  Derrick started the truck and headed back to the house. He might want out of this place, but he wasn’t about to take off without saying goodbye to Casey. He didn’t want it to be goodbye, but they both understood this couldn’t go anywhere. He had unfinished business that needed to be taken care of before he could move on. Even then he wasn’t sure he was going to be able too.

  He parked the truck in front of the house and went inside. She wasn’t in the living room, so he went and knocked on his office door. It felt odd knocking on his door, but she seemed to have wanted her privacy, and he was going to respect that.

  There was no answer, so he opened it and found it exactly the way he’d left it, empty. Closing the door, he called out to her but there was no response. When he entered the living room again, he saw the sheet she’d been wrapped in on the couch and her clothes he’d brought back from their little adventure were no longer where he’d left them. He hadn’t been gone long enough for her to have called for a ride so where the hell was she?

  Leaving the house, he made his way to the barn. The horses were there except for McLean’s and Bubba’s. That’s normal. Then he noticed McLean’s old piece-of-shit truck wasn’t there. Mclean was one hell of a cowboy, but driving and riding at the same time was impossible.

  Could she have taken the truck? And if so, why? If she needed to go somewhere, she could’ve called him, and he would’ve gladly given her a ride. Well, except I never gave her my cell number.

  Why would she think that? Have I ever been there offering my services? No. I bailed her out of trouble, but that is different. She has no reason to think I would be anything other than what I say I am. A jackass.

  That didn’t stop him from questioning where she would be and why. If he had to guess, Honeywell to meet with the townsfolk was his first choice. One thing he’d come to respect about her was she genuinely cared. Another damn thing I like about her. Is there anything not appealing? If so she hides it damn well. I have an entire list of shit she wouldn’t like about me.

  He debated stopping in town to find her, as opposed to leaving a note. Neither seemed right. He was leaving, and he had no clue what to say to her. “I had an amazing fucking time last night, but I can’t see you again,” sounds too damn cold, even for me.

  It was a stupid question and not what he wanted. Leaving wasn’t about not wanting her, because he wanted her more than he ever thought humanly possible. It was the fact that she brought out something in him he didn’t want to deal with—feelings. And a whole lot of them.

  This morning he’d awakened thinking of Casey. It shook him to the core, and he was physically sick. In five years, he’d never thought about anyone other than Penny. How could he forget, even for a moment? She’d been everything to him. He’d told her he’d never love anyone as he’d loved her. And he’d held onto that, until now.

  He wasn’t sure what his feelings were for Casey. It was not infatuation, or simply lust; he wanted her. It was so much more. He wanted to know so much more. Last night, he’d thought they would lie awake making love all night. Instead they’d lain in each other’s arms and talked.

  Why did he care what her favorite color was, or food? Did she like comedies or drama? He even asked about her family and childhood. He wasn’t just asking; he truly wanted to know. The more she spoke, the more he asked. Why, Derrick? Did I think I would come across something that would turn me off? All it did was make me want her more.

  It hadn’t been a surprise to learn she was the baby in her family. Considering how protective Mark was, he assumed that. Then again, if he had a sister and someone like him was showing even the slightest interest, he probably would have terrified him if he looked twice at her, never mind touched her.

  Casey was brilliant and confident. Anything he’d asked, she rattled off her answer quickly. But what intrigued him the most was when he asked why she joined FEMA. She had stumbled and given an answer that didn’t seem to fit. There was no passion when she talked about it, except when she spoke about helping others. He had the feeling she was going through the motions of the job, but if given the choice, she would be doing something different.

  Derrick wanted to push her, challenge her, to dig deeper into what she really wanted for her life, her job, but talking to her opened up the same internal question for him. He was damn good at what he did but only driven by the desire to make money. Nothing about it fulfilled him in any way. Actually, it leaves me feeling disgusted with myself. Talking companies into selling way below their value just because it means more money for my clients is not something to brag about. I’m an asshole and always will be.

  When he’d told her he’d left early this morning to go collect their belongings, that had only been partially true. He needed time alone. No matter how good it felt having her in his arms, the guilt of what they’d shared weighed on him heavily. Why the hell did I bring her back here?

  He wasn’t the only one who’d felt uncomfortable either. When he’d looked into Casey’s eyes, he’d seen her hesitation as well. So why hadn’t he stopped? He was a grown-ass adult who had never been driven or ruled by sex. Yet, he found himself unable to resist being with her. Touching her, tasting her. If it wasn’t for their surprise interruption, he would’ve had her again and again out in that field. It was so much more than just a physical release. It was a connection with her, one that he never thought he’d feel again. One that I shouldn’t have allowed to happen. It’s only going to get more difficult if I stay any longer. I need to cut the ties now before I hurt her any more.

  Picking up his cell he scrolled for her name. “Casey. Thanks for all you’re doing for Honeywell. I’m heading back to New York. Take care, Derrick.” He stood there staring at the message. It was so cold and impersonal after what they shared, but he couldn’t bring himself to say anything more. He needed to close that door, not just for her sake but for his as well. If he didn’t stop now, he never would be able to let her go. Fuck. I don’t know how I’m going to do it even now, but I’m going to do the right thing for once. There is no fucking way I’ll let anything ever hurt her, and right now, that thing is me.

  Looking at his phone one last time, he hit send.

  Derrick had one last call to make. As long as Casey was on his ranch, he wanted to make sure there was someone watching out for her.

  “Mornin’. Are you checking to see if we need a ride back from the Wild Sass since you just left us there last night?”

  He knew that was McLean’s way of fishing for information. Derrick wasn’t going to play that game. Not with him or anyone. What was between Casey and him was going to stay that way.

  “McLean, I need a favor.”

  “If it requires my driving anywhere, thought I would let you know, my truck seems to have gone missing.”

  “You’ll get it back.” Don’t know why you’d want it back, though. “I’m leaving for New York.”

  “Yep. Heard that several times this week.”

  “Don’t fuck with me, McLean. Casey might be here another day or two. I want you to keep an eye on her. If she needs anything, you make sure she gets it.”

  “My pleasure.”

  Derrick didn’t like the tone of his voice; McLean was too agreeable. “McLean, let me make myself very clear. If anything or anyone hurts her, it’s your ass I’m coming after. Understood?”

  “Yes, sir,” McLean responded, but there was an undertone of laughter that he hadn’t missed.

  That only made leaving even harder. If it weren’t for the fact he knew he could trust McLean, he’d cancel his meeting today an
d ride out the next few days with her. But that was only avoiding the evitable. Saying goodbye.

  Chapter Fifteen

  Casey shook her head again as she read the text from Derrick for about the millionth time. It wasn’t going to change. He left and said goodbye in a text message. Not just any text, but one without the slightest hint of emotion. She put more feelings in her emails to coworkers than what came through in his message. How foolish was she, thinking what they shared last night meant anything more to him than a physical release? He called me beautiful and amazing. He touched and kissed me, listened to me, asked me questions about me, my life. So stupid, Casey. What was I thinking? After all these years of him cutting off all people and emotions, did I really believe he’d fall in love with me? Why would he? He’d been married to the perfect woman. She was tall and stunning. I’m short and average at best. Damn, damn, damn, what was I thinking?

  “What’s wrong?”

  She looked up and saw Mark’s narrow glare. Shit! I know better than to daydream around him. I came here and asked him to help me and can’t even focus on what he’s saying to me.

  “I’m still thinking of the report.”

  Mark continued to stare but didn’t pursue the question again. “While you were thinking of the report, I sent it to a buddy of mine. We agree, this report is perfect. So clean that it is troubling us as well.”

  “That’s what I thought. I’ve seen other reports JT has on file, and trust me, he’s good, but perfect wouldn’t be a word I would use to describe them. Extremely detailed with a lot of fluff, if you know what I mean. I never would have guessed this was his until I saw his name.”

  “Is it possible someone else did it and submitted it under his name?”

  “No. I thought about that as well. Not with the security system we have. I just don’t understand what would’ve motivated him to doctor a report?”

  Mark reached out and grabbed her hand. She gave it a squeeze. It felt good having her brother close by right now. She didn’t know what she would’ve done if she had to face this alone. Detective work was not in her comfort zone.

  Mark’s voice took on a serious tone. “You’re scared. I get it. And Casey, if what I suspect is accurate, you have the right to be.”

  What am I doing? All I wanted to do was fly under the radar so JT would get off my back and quit micromanaging me. Now I’m about to have him investigated. When did my life start spinning out of control? She’d known this wasn’t going to be her average assignment. She’d never imagined just how out of the ordinary it was going to be.

  Casey could tell the wheels were turning, and Mark was already plotting out the next move. “That bad?”

  “Are you sure you want me to look into this? My contacts are extremely discreet, but what neither of us knows yet is why this report looks as it does and how high this knowledge goes.”

  “What’s the worst thing that could happen? I get fired.”

  “Casey, you’re so damn naïve. If someone really went to the lengths we believe they did to cover up the culpability for the deaths of Penelope and Kimberly Nash, then there is no telling how far they will go to keep it that way.”

  “You mean—?”

  “Yes.”

  She couldn’t allow herself to think of that. If she did back down, whoever did this would win. It was about time she stepped up. Her family courageously had faced difficult situations, and some of them had been life threatening. I’m a Collins too, damn it. And I’m not backing down!

  Casey swallowed hard. I just want to find some answers for Derrick. Maybe then he can find peace. Maybe they all can. Looking Mark square in the eyes, she said as confidently as she could, “That family deserves the truth.”

  “I can’t be here to do this, but I’m going to get a friend of mine to come and be my eyes until I return.”

  “I don’t need a babysitter, Mark.”

  “Trust me, you won’t even know he’s around.”

  That doesn’t make me feel any better. “Don’t have anyone spying on me. I’ll keep a low profile. Trust me.”

  Mark nodded but hadn’t truly agreed. Fighting him on this would never work; he would do what he damn well pleased. And right now, even though she wouldn’t admit it, she was scared. It would be nice knowing there was someone close by if the shit hit the fan, and someone pointed a finger at her.

  “Give me your phone.”

  Casey pulled it out of her pocket and handed it to him. He maneuvered it better than she did. She knew he was installing a location tracker on her phone. She wasn’t as naïve as he thought.

  When he handed it back he showed her an emergency contact that wasn’t there before. It wasn’t one number but a group of odd numbers. It looked more like codes than numbers.

  “What is this?”

  “Listen. I cannot stress enough that we don’t know who we’re dealing with yet. So trust no one. Understood?”

  She nodded. That’s going to be hard, as I normally trust everyone. Is that why I get hurt so much?

  “I want you to press this if any trouble comes your way and I’m not with you.”

  “Will this go to you?”

  “Me and a select few who I trust with my life.”

  She looked at her phone again. When she started looking into this case, she thought she’d put Derrick’s mind to ease that everything was okay, and it was truly a freak accident. How was she going to tell him he might be right after all these years? Easy. I won’t tell him anything unless we have proof. And then, I’ll let the authorities deliver the news. “Thanks, Mark.”

  “I want you to stay very close to Derrick. He might come off as a hard-ass, but from what I’ve seen when he looks at you, he won’t let anything happen to you.”

  For once, big brother dear, you’re wrong. Why did it have to be this time? “I’ll stay on the ranch until my assignment is over and then head back to Buffalo for a while.”

  “You haven’t been back since Mom and Dad left. What aren’t you telling me?”

  That my heart is breaking and I want to hide under my covers and never come out. “With everything going on right now, I just want to be someplace I feel comfortable. Safe.”

  Casey had chosen her words carefully. No matter how overprotective he might be at times, she knew there was nothing he wouldn’t do to ensure her safety. Mark, that is just another reason I love you, but there are things you can’t protect me from, and heartache is one of them. And having you, or anyone else, around is not going to help. Not this time.

  “So why not stay on the ranch with Derrick?”

  How can you be so observant and so clueless at that same time? It’s so simple. Derrick was telling me the truth: we only had yesterday. “Mark, I was here for one reason. To do my job. Yes, I may have met someone I like, but that doesn’t change anything. Once I am no longer needed here, I will go. End of story.”

  Casey felt nauseous even thinking this was it, the end. But he left without seeing her face to face. If that didn’t say it was final, she didn’t know what would.

  “Let me know when you leave to head home. Maybe I’ll meet you there. I’ve got the time, may as well spend it with you.”

  Casey looked at him and shook her head. “I thought Sissie said her cousin needed your contractor’s expertise.” She couldn’t help but chuckle. “Since when do you do home remolding?”

  “Since last night.”

  “How are you going to break the news to her that you’re not taking the job?”

  “Who said I’m not taking the job? I called her cousin Hannah, and I can start the job anytime.”

  “If she’s anything like Sissie, you’ve met your match.” Casey was glad to share a fun moment with Mark. It had been too long since they’d teased each other.

  “The job is sounding more appealing every second. Too much of the quiet life may make me all soft like you.”

  “Don’t worry, Mark. No one is ever going to accuse you of being all soft and emotional. Well, at least, not t
o your face.”

  Casey couldn’t help but think of Derrick. He was so much like Mark. On the outside they were so controlling, but inside, they both needed to be loved. I hope one day you guys wake up and figure that out before it’s too late. We all know no one is guaranteed tomorrow. But you two choose not to try. I don’t understand it and probably never will.

  Mark walked her back to the truck and hugged her. She climbed into McLean’s old pickup, which had bucked and rattled the entire trip there. She hoped it would make the trip back to the ranch without breaking down. The last thing she needed right now was to explain how she borrowed the truck without asking and couldn’t return it because it crapped out on her. I could add it to the extensive list of bad choices I’ve made this week. What is one more at this point? Ugh. If it wasn’t for bad luck, I wouldn’t have any luck this week.

  She looked around and didn’t see any vehicle. “How are you getting back to town?”

  “I’m not going back. But I won’t be far, so call me if you need me.”

  She looked puzzled. Surely he wasn’t going to walk. “Mark, we are out in the middle of nowhere.”

  “Just the way I like it.”

  She was about to comment when she saw a chopper approaching in the distance. I should have known. Maybe I should ask them for a lift. No matter how badly she wanted to, she couldn’t bring herself to ask Mark for any more help than she already had. It was bad enough she’d come to him regarding the report. She could rationalize that as helping the Nash family. That didn’t mean she wasn’t totally independent.

  That was something she’d fought long and hard to achieve with her family. She was surrounded by strong, heroic people who always wanted to be there for others in every way. Just because I’m five foot two doesn’t mean I’m not capable of taking care of myself.

  “I don’t think you ever gave me all the details about what happened to your truck.”