Hearts Are Wild

by Synithia Williams

  “Aw, baby. Can you lift your arm?” They all waited, breath held, as Brady attempted to raise his arm, and failed.

  “I’m sorry, I’m so sorry.” Brady was crying and when Shannon tried to take him from Dean, he held on tight. “I’m so very sorry.” She realized Brady was trying to apologize to Dean.

  “What’s to be sorry about, bud? I should be apologizing to you, leaving that dangerous tree here.” Dean’s attempt at humor earned a small, watery smile.

  “Your flowers. I busted up your flowers.” Everyone looked down to see that roughly half the flowers they had planted were now trampled flat.

  “Hey, if those flowers helped cushion your fall and kept you from breaking both arms, then it was well worth it.”

  Shannon walked quickly beside Dean as he carried Brady up to the house. She silently cursed herself for being the worst mother ever. Way to pay attention! Her kid was off climbing trees, unbeknownst to her because she had been busy making goo-goo eyes at the neighbor.

  How could she have been so selfish? The first time she let her guard down and one of her babies got hurt. Shannon swallowed back the sob that burned in her lungs. There would be time for crying later.

  Chapter Seven

  They were lucky it wasn’t a compound fracture. Dean had seen someone fall off the stage during rehearsal once, and the resulting break had shoved the ankle bone out of the skin like it was a jagged knife. He didn’t mind admitting he had come damned close to throwing up when he saw it. Brady was trying so hard not to cry. The poor guy was putting on such a brave front. Probably didn’t want to scare his mom any more than he had. Dean totally got that.

  “We can take my SUV. There is plenty of room for the kids in the back.” Dean strode purposefully toward the driveway.

  “They need their booster seats. I’ve got this, Dean. It’s not your responsibility.” She was shutting him out. Her eyes reflected the cold steel that had slammed down between them.

  “Fine. You take Brady to the emergency room and I’ll watch the other two.”

  Still carrying the little boy, Dean hurried to Shannon’s yard and waited at the blue minivan for her to run in and grab her purse and the car keys. Brenna sniffled quietly at his side. Shannon hurried back to the car and opened the door. Gently, Dean deposited Brady in the nearest car seat and was nudged aside before he could even reach for the seat belt.

  “He’s my son. I’ll buckle him in.” Mama bear was showing her claws. “Brian, Brenna, get in the car.”

  “Shannon, this is ridiculous. You need to focus on Brady. You can’t do that with the other two there.”

  “Do not tell me what to do. I have this under control. I do not need your help.” Her fingers trembled as she fastened the seat belt.

  Dean waited until she was done and gently drew her aside. Shannon refused to meet his eyes. He rubbed his hands up and down her arms, trying to sooth rattled nerves, trying to shore up her strength. He remained silent. If he tried to hold her she might come undone, and she wouldn’t want the kids to see her like that. Holding her at arm’s length, Dean watched Shannon as she silently waged an inner battle.

  “You need to be the best mom you can be to Brady right now. Let me watch Brian and Brenna. Please. It’s the only way I can think of to start making this up to you.”

  Shannon’s head snapped up and she stared at him in confusion.

  “You didn’t do anything. This isn’t your fault. I wasn’t watching him. It’s my job to protect him.” Hysteria edged the words that had Dean’s heart squeezing painfully.

  He continued to rub her arms and waited for the hitch in her breathing to go back to normal. Her eyes never left his face. It wasn’t that she didn’t trust him with her children. He understood that. It was the damned responsibility she couldn’t seem to relinquish. Shannon was determined to do it all on her own. She swallowed hard and tugged her arms out of his grasp, wrapping them tightly around her middle.

  “Don’t feed them a ton of sugar if you don’t want to deal with a couple of crazy animals. I’ll be back as soon as I can.” She tore her gaze away and herded up the other two children. “Be good for Mr. Dean. Cut him some slack, huh? Brady and I will be back soon. I bet he’ll have a super cool cast for you two to sign.” Hooking an arm around each child, she hugged them hard and dropped a kiss on both carrot-topped heads.

  Dean gathered the kids out of the way of the minivan and waved goodbye. Everyone stood awkwardly for a few moments. As the reality of the situation hit, he was stunned to realize he’d just offered to watch not one, but two five-year-olds. He’d never babysat a day in his life! Were they potty trained? Please, God, let them be potty trained.

  “Let’s plant more flowers. We can fix the squished parts,” Brian declared.

  “Yeah, that will make Brady feel better.” Brenna slipped her hand into Dean’s as they headed back to his yard by way of the break in the Arborvitae.

  Simple logic, really, but it worked for him. Dean and the remaining two triplets cleared the ruined marigolds away and planted more. He really had bought more than he had any idea what to do with. Brenna and Brian hauled a heavy watering can to the tree and Dean helped them lift it to sprinkle the ring of newly planted flowers with water. Then, once again, they headed for the hose to rinse their messy hands and knees.

  Panic tried to rear its head again, now that a new activity did not immediately present itself. What would Shannon do? Dean thought to himself. He remembered her warning about sugary snacks and thought it best to stay away from food altogether.

  “Can we watch TV?” Brenna batted her eyelashes hopefully.

  “Yeah, got any movies?”

  Dean mentally went through the stack of DVDs he owned, trying to rate them in terms of suitability. Most were of the “blow ’em up” variety. Shannon would have his head. He didn’t think he owned anything Disney-esque. Eh, they could find something On Demand.

  Not fully comfortable with two five-year-olds parking it on his couch for an extended length of time, Dean suggested they both use the bathroom. He raised a silent prayer that they wouldn’t need his help in there.

  The gods were smiling down at him this time. He didn’t have to wipe any butts. If it stayed this easy, he could actually handle this babysitting thing.

  “Mr. Dean, can I sit in your lap?” Brenna sat on the couch, looking tiny and very vulnerable.

  Dean looked from her to her brother. They waited, expectantly. He hadn’t actually intended to watch the movie with them. He had a lot of email to catch up on. Already seated in his comfy recliner, laptop open and booting up, Dean hoped they would take the hint. Nope.

  Oh, wow, this was so out of his comfort zone. Dean settled on the couch and waited for Brenna to climb onto his lap. She curled a strand of hair around her forefinger and snuggled into his chest.

  Apparently assuming that this was a party, and anyone could join in, Brian shifted across the cushions until he was flattened against Dean’s side. With his one remaining free hand, Dean flipped through the offerings on the screen. The kids ended up choosing Charlotte’s Web, assuring him they had this at home and watched it all the time.

  “Mr. Dean? Do you think Brady is okay?”

  “I think he’s probably feeling much better now that he’s gotten a lot of fussing over by all the doctors and nurses at the ER.”

  He knew a lot had ridden on that answer, as he could feel both tiny bodies melt with relief. Poor kids were scared for their brother. Dean bet they’d never had to be split up like this before. He placed a comforting arm around each child and settled in to watch a barnyard full of animals talk like humans.

  • • •

  She owed him big. It had been a few days since Shannon had collected the kids from Dean’s house and rushed off. She hadn’t known what to say then, and she didn’t have a clearer idea now. Shannon watched the kids running through the sprinkler, Brady’s cast wrapped in a plastic bag to keep it dry. She was hovering, she knew it, keeping her precious family
in a bubble. She was so used to going it alone that her instincts told her to shut out the world.

  Dean had stopped by the day after the accident. He knocked at the door, standing on the porch with the biggest teddy bear she had ever seen. It would have been so easy to open the door, let him into their bubble. But she didn’t. Seeing him brought all that guilt to the forefront. She recalled reaching for Dean’s hand on his deck, then hearing Brady scream. Bile clawed at her throat as she ignored the rapping. Tears pricked her eyelids when the triplets asked why she wouldn’t let Mr. Dean in.

  Now who was playing the hermit? Shannon slouched in her lawn chair, her eyes drawn to the gap in the arborvitae. Come back over, she willed. No, don’t! Oh, this was insane. She had proven that hormones clouded her mothering instincts. Compartmentalize. She could do this. Shove all that lust into a deep dark box, wrap it in chains, and throw a big ol’ boulder on it for good measure.

  A high shriek had Shannon halfway out of her chair before she realized it was a shriek of delight. She stood up, rubbing her arms briskly. She flashed an overly bright smile at the triplets so they wouldn’t be alarmed. Brady waved his grocery bag-wrapped arm at her. Bless him, he was such a trooper. She was so lucky to have her children. They were her life. She didn’t need anything . . . or anyone else.

  “Great day for a run in the sprinkler, isn’t it?”

  Shannon’s head snapped around and she jumped back to find Dean standing right behind her.

  “So, yeah, I can see the attraction. Sneaking through that hedge is kind of fun.” His bright eyes were full of merriment.

  “I believe our roles have officially reversed.” She knew she was sounding snotty, but if it pushed him away, so much the better.

  “Are you asking me to leave?” His quiet voice sounded just the tiniest bit hurt.

  He’d given her an out. Shannon closed her eyes, blew out a sigh, and pictured that box. Mentally, she tugged on the chains and hoped to God they’d hold. She opened her eyes and gave him a half smile.

  “I want to apologize. I didn’t thank you properly for saving my butt the other day. You did me a huge favor, watching Brian and Brenna for me.”

  “It’s what neighbors do. We help each other.”

  “Neighbors.” The chains on that box started rattling and she added a huge troll to sit atop the boulder. There. She could do this.

  “So, how’s the patient?” Dean paused and did a double-take when he saw the plastic bag encasing Brady’s plaster cast.

  “Couldn’t ask for a better one. He’s been so cheerful, doesn’t complain. Loves the attention, naturally. As long as he has regular doses of ice cream, he’s a champ.”

  “And how is his mom? I’ve got to admit, she didn’t look so good when I saw her last.”

  “His mom is up to her eyeballs in mommy-guilt right now. But she’ll pull through. Just give her a little time.” Shannon lifted her shoulders to her ears and let them drop back down.

  “It’s a rite of passage, you know? Every kid has to have that cool story that they can talk up at camp or sleepovers or whatever.”

  “Oh, yeah? What was your rite of passage?” Shannon looked Dean up and down, trying to figure out where his battle scars lay.

  “Mine? I was riding on the back of my buddy’s bike—barefoot. Foot slipped, got mangled in the spokes. Took most of the skin off the top. Wasted too much of the summer on the couch. I would have much rather broken my arm.”

  Shannon’s face scrunched up in disgust and her muscles bunched in commiseration. Just hearing that one made her hurt. She caught herself as her hand had already begun to reach out, to comfort the child that Dean had been. Stop it!

  Ironically, it was Dean who reached out to sooth. He clasped Shannon’s hand in his own and squeezed, holding it just a moment before letting it go.

  “Just don’t wallow too long, okay? You really have nothing to feel guilty about.”

  He dashed over to the kids, pretending that the spray of water was a force field he couldn’t penetrate. They howled with laughter. Shannon tried not to notice how perfect they all looked together.

  Chapter Eight

  Dean nearly fell from bed in his haste to answer the doorbell. It wasn’t even 8 o’clock in the morning. Something had to be wrong at Shannon’s. He stubbed his toe on the bedroom doorframe and slid down the first three stairs. His heart knocked at his chest as loudly as the banging on the door. Who was hurt this time?

  “Dino! ’Bout damned time. Did I wake you?” The chuckle that followed suggested his dear friend, and former bandmate, was quite pleased with himself.

  “Jax? What the hell are you doing here?”

  Dean dug the heels of his hands into his eyes and blew out a noisy sigh of frustration. The fear Dean had felt upon waking had pulled his nerves taut. Now, as they relaxed, he was left totally wrung out.

  “Dude, you went off the radar. Everyone’s asking about you.”

  He didn’t even bother to hide the snort that particular news elicited. Leading the way into the kitchen at the back of the house, Dean gestured to a stool at the granite counter. He filled the carafe with water and played thumb war with the coffee filters. Knowing Jax didn’t like his coffee strong, Dean threw an extra scoop into the basket, his humor somewhat restored.

  “So . . . what? You take the red eye in?”

  “Surprise.” Jax leaned in and snagged an apple out of the wire basket in the center of the island. He took a huge bite and grinned around the mouthful.

  “I told you guys I wanted some time. We’ll have the house warming to end all house warmings, but . . . ” He pinched the bridge of his nose.

  The coffee finished brewing and Dean doctored his, leaving Jax to fend for himself. He stepped out onto the deck and stood at the railing. His eyes were drawn to the patio table, where he and Shannon had begun to have a “moment.”

  Then, because she felt that her son’s fall from the tree was actually her fault, she had erected this ridiculous wall. Even crazier was the fact that this frustrated and disappointed him to no end. He was supposed to be hiding out from all things female. Women were trouble. Women were paternity suits and settlements, headaches and . . . And yet, Shannon was none of that.

  “Whatcha thinkin’ about?” Jax leaned a hip against the rail and grimaced as he took a slug of coffee.

  “How complicated life can be.” Dean closed his eyes and breathed deep, the now familiar scents of the Atlantic coastline a soothing balm.

  “What’s her name?”

  “Shannon. Hey!” He glared over the rim of his coffee mug.

  “You came here to get away from the estrogen set and things got even more messed up, huh?”

  “In a nutshell.”

  Jax swirled the liquid around in his cup, his grin having finally disappeared. He stared intently at the tree line. Dean groaned inwardly. Oh, he knew that look. He was being ambushed. Well, it didn’t matter. His answer was no.

  “Out with it.” Dean wheeled on his friend and pinned him with a pointed look.

  “This reality show contacted Jordie. They want to get the whole band in for interviews. Do some ‘where are they now?’ type stuff, ya know?”

  “Have fun with that. I’ll pass.” He flung the dregs of his mug over the railing. Whether to fertilize or kill the lawn below, time would tell.

  “It just means a quick trip back, Dino. Then you and Shannon can unravel whatever is making things complicated.” Jax sat down in a patio chair, stretching out his long legs.

  “Ha!” Dean’s laugh was curt. “Stop calling me Dino. It’s Dean now. It’s been Dean for a long time now. I’m done with that life. It was fun while it lasted, but I’m done.” He started pacing, frowning when he tried to shove his hands into his jeans pockets, only to remember he was wearing sweats. “And this thing with Shannon? It’s being ‘Dino’ that is making it complicated!”

  “Is she star-struck? After your millions? Has she asked you to introduce her to anyone yet?” Jax was every bi
t as familiar with the downside of dating when you were a celebrity as Dean was.

  “She doesn’t know,” he spoke very softly.

  “She doesn’t know how much you’re worth?” Jax stood up and stalked closer, a hand on his shoulder stopping Dean from wearing a path on the cedar planks.

  “Shannon doesn’t know I’m Dino Valentine. She doesn’t know I used to be in a boy band. She doesn’t know she’s living next door to a celebrity has-been, or that I’m running away from yet another fake paternity suit.” That’s what was complicated.

  • • •

  The sun had already pushed its way through the early morning fog. The day was shaping up to be a hot one. Shannon finished wiping down the kitchen counters and tossed the sponge into the sink. Her little slug-a-beds had only just stumbled out for some Cheerios and juice. The usual morning chatter was replaced by yawns and bored sighs. Everyone picked listlessly at their breakfast. Time to shake things up a bit.

  “Supposed to be a hot one today.” This was met with groans. “It would probably be a little cooler by the shore.” Wait for it . . .

  “Yeah! We’re going to the beach!” Brian scrambled from his chair, sloshing milk on the table in his hurry to take his cereal bowl to the sink.

  “Can we invite Drake and Danny to come with us? I still haven’t showed them my cast.” Brady visibly vibrated with excitement.

  “Let’s see if they have any plans for today. Tumble Tots is closed.”

  The kids raced off to put on swim trunks and a bathing suit. Shannon called her friend to invite her and the twins to the beach. Between Memorial Weekend and Labor Day Weekend, parking anywhere near the beach was challenging, to say the least. The early bird got the parking spot, and woe betide anyone forgetting to pack quarters. Oh, how the town relied on tourist season!

  Leaving the triplets to figure out what sand toys, floats, and other essential toys to bring to the beach, Shannon packed a cooler. Ah, the first beach day of the season. She reached for the peanut butter but then remembered that little Danny was allergic to peanuts. Knowing her children’s penchant for sharing, that wasn’t a chance she was willing to take. Jam sandwiches it would be, then.