His Untamed Love

by Anya Summers

  “Cole, that’s a load of bullshit the size of Texas. If you wanted to change, you could, but apparently you don’t. And maybe you do casual relationships by the dozen, but I’m not built that way. It’s obvious that my feelings on this don’t matter, so I’m going to ask you again to get out.”

  “Mia, I never meant to hurt you.”

  “That’s a load of crap too. If you don’t want to hurt someone, you don’t do it. I hope you have a nice life with the memories of your dead girlfriend,” she said, marching out of the bedroom and heading toward the bathroom.

  Cole followed her and snarled, “You are out of line.”

  “Get your hands off me. I don’t really care that I’m out of line. You made me fall for you and then you tell me you don’t do relationships because of a past relationship. I can overcome a lot, Cole. I’ve been forced to do that for most of my life, but I can’t compete with a fucking ghost. No one could. Just leave. I don’t want to see you anymore. And I expect you to be gone when I get out of the shower.”

  She wrenched her arm from his grasp and slammed the door in his face. She bit the backs of her knuckles to choke back the sob lodged in her throat and waited, holding her breath until she heard the front door slam shut. Only then did she let herself dissolve.

  She stood underneath the hot spray. She scrubbed her body, trying to get the scent of him off, until her skin was raw. There were bruises on her hips from last night. And her rear was tender.

  Mia stepped out of the shower, the pressure in her chest increasing. She glanced frantically around the cabin. Then she moved like lightning, the full brunt of a panic attack settling in.

  She had to get out of there. Leave the lodge. She’d been an idiot to think that the lodge, that her location would change anything. She packed her things. If she left today, she could make it back to Cheyenne by nightfall.

  Mia moved like a whirlwind. It would take her an hour, maybe two to get all her stuff together. But then she would be gone.

  Chapter 27

  Cole slammed his way into his house only to encounter Emily and Mason embracing in the kitchen. At least they were fully clothed this time. Before he could spin on his heels, they broke apart.

  Mason said, “Cole. Didn’t expect to see you. After last night with Mia, we figured you would be with her today.”

  “I can see that. If you don’t need me, I’m heading up to the cabin,” Cole gritted out. His anger roiled and seethed. He needed to be alone so he could rage at the heavens.

  “And will Mia be accompanying you?” Mason asked.

  Cole snapped, “No. Mia’s not going with me anywhere. Not that it’s any of your goddamn business.”

  He strode past them both and took the stairs up to his room. He dropped his goody bag on the floor and packed his backpack with some extra clothing and supplies. He’d shower once he made it up to the cabin. He did at least change out of last night’s clothing, that carried a hint of her peaches and cream scent, before heading back downstairs.

  Once he returned, he would call the contractors he’d hired to build his house. He needed his own place sooner rather than later. If he had to, he could spend the majority of his time up at his cabin until then.

  Cole loped back down the stairs. Both Emily and Mason were still in the kitchen. Mason was on his phone.

  “Thanks for calling me, Billie. No, just give her a refund for the last week of her stay,” Mason said, glaring at Cole as he marched into the kitchen and poured coffee into a mug.

  “Yeah, I’m sure. Thanks,” Mason said and hung up his phone. “You can be a real asshole, Cole. I’d forgotten how moody and bitchy you could be sometimes. Don’t you want to know what that was about?”

  “What?” Cole asked.

  “Mia’s leaving the lodge. Today. She’s cutting her stay here short by a week,” Mason replied giving him the stink eye.

  Cole swore internally. He hadn’t meant to do that. But whenever Lana was mentioned, he couldn’t see clearly. Maybe that was his problem, that he’d never truly made peace with his past. With the what ifs he’d lived with for going on a decade.

  Mason scowled. “I’m assuming you’re the cause of her abrupt departure.”

  Cole scraped a tired hand over his face. “That would be an accurate assumption. Let me see what I can do. We had a fight. She wanted to stay on longer, and you know I don’t do long-term relationships.”

  “Lana? Again? Jesus, Cole, and here I thought I was the screwed up one. I’ve given Mia a refund on the next week. It will be refunded, even if she decides to stay. But if you can’t step the fuck up and be the man, be the Dom that Mia needs, let her go. There were quite a few Doms last night who would only be too happy to take your place.”

  “Piss off, Mase,” Cole snarled and would have decked him if Emily hadn’t intervened and stood between them.

  “If you even try it, you won’t eat my cooking for a month. Go cool off and don’t come back until you can talk with a level head,” she said without even flinching.

  Cole glowered at her, and she gave as good as she got. Which was why she fit his brother to a tee. Mason needed her fire.

  Cole clenched his jaw and nodded. “Fine,” he ground out. He set his coffee mug on the counter and strode past the two of them. Cole would go fix things with Mia, so at least she didn’t leave on his account.

  And to think, the day had started so promisingly… only to end up in the toilet.

  Chapter 28

  Cole blew off most of his anger on the way to Mia’s cabin. He was being an ass. He knew that. Was he being unreasonable?

  Maybe.

  Before Mia’s advent into his life, things had been fairly black and white for him. He’d never had cause to question whether his no relationship policy was good or not. It had just worked for him—until Mia.

  The problem was, he genuinely liked her. She was tough. Even when life had kicked her tail feathers, she’d picked herself up and forged on.

  When he neared her cabin, Mia carted out a suitcase and packed it in the back of her SUV.

  She spied him first before he could say anything. She shook her head. “I don’t want to talk to you. Just go away.”

  “No. Mia, I’m sorry, but I was honest with you from the start.”

  “You were, and I didn’t listen. The joke’s on me.” She tried to get around him but he stepped into her path.

  “It’s not like that and you know it. I wish you’d stay,” he said.

  “Why? So we can continue to be fuck buddies? Cole, I care about you. I don’t want to, you’re surly and rude, but I do. I shared all of myself with you. And the thing is, you refuse to let me in. Refuse to even consider that there might be something more here, something worthwhile.”

  “I thought you just wanted it to be sex,” he replied, feeling his defenses ratchet up.

  She shoved a strand of hair out of her face and pierced him with a look. “Things change. But now I see you’re unwilling to. Or maybe it’s just me, and I only seem to invite men who like me when it’s convenient for them—as long as I don’t try to get too close.”

  “Don’t put me in the same category as your asshole ex,” he replied.

  “Why not? You only wanted me for what I could give you, to use, if you will, and the moment it became uncomfortable or got too serious, you bailed,” Mia said with a shrug, as if it were an obvious deduction.

  “Lana is not a subject I like to discuss,” he said quietly, wondering why he never talked about her. Had he been using her ghost as a shield against life?

  “I got that loud and clear. And I won’t ask again. You were right. This was a short-term arrangement. Take care, Cole. I hope you find whatever it is you’re looking for.”

  “There’s nothing I can say to convince you to stay?” he asked, his gaze drinking in the sight of her, trying to compute that this was it. That he wouldn’t run into her out on the trail the next day.

  “What would be the point? You can say all the words you want t
o, but if you don’t mean them, they’re worthless. Goodbye, Cole.” Mia stared at him, her teal eyes brimming with unshed tears, like she was waiting for him to say or do something. But he was frozen and mired in a hell of his own making. She shook her head, dismissing him, and climbed behind the wheel of her Audi.

  Cole’s chest ached as he watched her drive away. Dejected, he sat on the stoop, staring out at the land. He knew he couldn’t go up to the cabin. He would just be swamped with memories of them together.

  Mia hurt in every molecule of her body. She checked out of the Black Elkhorn Lodge and Resort with the thought that she’d been right when she’d first arrived. This had been a bad idea. Fighting back tears, she turned over the keys.

  “Is there anything else I can do for you, Miss Evans?” Billie asked.

  “Actually, there is one thing. Could you please give this to Emily?” Mia asked, handing her a small box that contained the dress she’d borrowed, plus signed copies of her first two books with a promise for the third.

  “I certainly will, miss. I hope you come see us again sometime,” Billie replied.

  “Perhaps.” As in: she planned to never set foot in this state again. And even then, she didn’t know if it would be far enough to outrun her heartbreak.

  Mia walked out of the lodge and got into her vehicle. After checking half a dozen times to make sure no one was in her way, she backed out of the parking space and headed toward the exit.

  She made the turn off the lodge property and onto the highway, and only then did she let the tears fall. She drove, her heart rending in two.

  How was she going to pick up the pieces of her life?

  She drove, wiping at her tears and not paying attention. Her heart was bleeding. She went to merge onto the highway in the heart of Jackson Hole, the one that would take her south to Cheyenne.

  Only she failed to see the little hatchback crossing lanes and speeding. She collided with the passenger side of the other car. The collision sent her Audi into a spin into oncoming traffic. Mia overturned the wheel, attempting to course-correct the vehicle as it slid off the highway, but the force of the impact was too great and her Audi rolled into the embankment.

  Her head smacked the steering wheel as the car rolled, and it was lights out.

  Chapter 29

  Cole walked back beyond the house down a short winding stretch of road. It was in the opposite direction from where he planned to build his house. He came to the familiar black wrought-iron fencing and entered the square lot. The clearing of trees wasn’t large, perhaps fifty feet by twenty feet, but beyond the copse, the land dropped away with a stunning view of the valley.

  It was here, on this tiny plot of land that they had gated, that he and Mason had buried their parents. First their mom, and not a year later, their dad. There were marble headstones to mark their graves, but that wasn’t why he was here. There was a third grave marker without an actual grave beneath it.

  When Lana died, her parents had claimed her body and taken her back east to be buried. He’d commissioned this stone, making it a place he visited whenever he needed to talk to Lana.

  Cole lowered himself down onto the stone bench he’d put up here as well.

  “Hey, babe. It’s been a while,” he said, leaning his elbows on his knees as he stared at her marker.

  In the first few years after her death, he’d come here every week, bringing flowers and such. But, over time, his visits had become less frequent.

  He told her about Mia, trying to figure out why his heart felt like it had imploded inside his chest. When he had finished, he felt wetness on his face and looked up, expecting rain, and realized they were tears.

  Fuck, he’d messed up.

  When a hand touched his shoulder, he started.

  “It’s just me, Cole,” Emily said. “Mind if I have a seat?”

  “How did you know about this place?” he asked.

  “Your brother.”

  “Why am I not surprised? Why are you here, Emily?” he said, his voice sounding defeated, even to his ears.

  “Because I wanted to show you this.” She held up a note.

  “What is that?” Cole asked.

  “Mia left my dress in a box with Billie. And I wanted to read you what she said.”

  Cole shook his head and said, “Have at it, because you won’t relent until you do.”

  “P.S. Don’t be mad at Cole. He warned me that he didn’t do relationships and I fell in love with him anyway.”

  He hung his head. Shit. Even now, she was trying to protect him when he was the one who had caused her harm.

  “Cole, not to rain on your parade or anything, but Mason told me about Lana. I know you must have loved her very much, but don’t you think she’d want you to be happy? I know if it were me, I wouldn’t want Mason to mourn me for the rest of his life. That’s what love is, Cole.

  “And I realize we’ve only known each other for a few months, but since Mia arrived, you’ve been different, in a good way. I think you’re fighting it because she got in. And I think if you allowed yourself to be happy, you would see it.”

  “My brother’s damn lucky to have you,” Cole murmured.

  “He is, but you have me, too. I love you, Cole.”

  “Does Mason know?” he asked.

  “You’re the brother I always wanted, and I want to see you happy. But take it from me, you have to decide to be happy and go after it. And that doesn’t mean it’s not a risk because it is.”

  Cole slipped his arm around Emily’s shoulders and hugged her against him. “And I always wanted a sister to tease.”

  “And?” she asked.

  “I’ll think about it. It’s been a long time since I even considered having a real relationship that wasn’t contained to the club,” he said, then felt Emily shiver beside him.

  “Let’s get out of here,” he said, glancing at Lana’s headstone for a final time. Because he knew, deep down, that he’d fallen for Mia, and he’d needed to come here to say goodbye, a last goodbye, to the woman who’d first shown him what love was.

  He and Emily hiked back to the lodge under the noonday sun. Cole wasn’t any closer to an answer on what to do about Mia. But he knew he had to re-evaluate his stance because somehow he’d fallen in love with her too.

  They entered the lodge. Mason was talking to Billie at the registration desk. Emily squeezed Cole’s hand just as his phone rang.

  Recognizing the number, he answered, “Jackson, what can I do for you?”

  “Cole, thank God I caught you. It’s Mia, she’s been in an accident,” Jackson said.

  The world spun around him. In a weird twist of fate, he was reliving the past as it grabbed him by the throat. “An accident? What happened? Is Mia all right? Is she…” Dead? He couldn’t formulate the last word. She couldn’t be dead. He wouldn’t accept it, not when he still had so much to say to her. Christ, why had he been such an asshole this morning?

  Jackson said, “She’s alive. She was unconscious when we arrived at the scene of the accident and is suffering from shock. The paramedics thought she might have broken her arm. She’s been taken to St. John’s Hospital in Jackson.”

  Cole’s breath expelled in a giant rush. She was alive. Thank Christ! “I’m on my way.”

  “I’ll see you there. I’m collecting all of her items that were in the vehicle. She had quite a few. I’ve got Spencer on his way to the accident scene to help out with that.”

  “Thanks for calling me, Jack. And for taking care of all of this. Mia will appreciate you and Spencer gathering her things out of the vehicle. I know her computers were in there. I owe you one,” Cole said, ending the call and heading toward the rear exit of the lodge. His destination: the house for his keys, then his truck, and on to the hospital. How badly was she hurt?

  Mason and Emily said, “We’ll come with you. We just need to—”

  Cole glanced at the pair as he opened the back door of the lodge. “I’m not waiting. I’ll see you there.”<
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  Then he strode through the lodge doorway without a backward glance. He had only one thought: to reach Mia as fast as possible. He raced up the path, hell bent on grabbing his keys and getting to the hospital.

  He was in and out of the house in a flash. He gunned the engine and tore off down the drive. What if she was more injured than the paramedics had surmised at the crash site? What if she had internal bleeding or was in a coma? He gripped the steering wheel so tight, he was surprised he wasn’t leaving divots.

  He was a bloody fool. The biggest of them all. He’d thought he was so tough, keeping his distance with all the subs at the club. He’d thought he was immune to loving another woman. He’d been so wrong. It was because none of them had been Mia.

  From the start, she had crawled under his skin with her haunted eyes and pouting mouth, her fearless determination to try new things, her trust in him when she’d not had a whole lot of reason to trust anyone, her sharp, intelligent mind, and the way she gave every bit of herself to him in bed.

  Cole scrubbed a hand over his face. There was a reason why every time he tried to recall Lana’s face, it was Mia’s that bloomed in his mind. He loved her. He’d never seen her coming. She had run roughshod over his neat and tidy existence.

  His love for Mia in no way diminished what he’d had with Lana. Cole had loved Lana with everything he’d been at the time, and whether they would have made it or not was something that he would never know. But he was finally ready to let her be at peace and move on. She’d always be a part of him.

  Cole only hoped that he wasn’t too late. That he could convince Mia to forgive him for being an idiot, and ask her to be part of his future.

  At the hospital, he parked and all but ran to the emergency room. He asked about Mia but since he wasn’t family, they wouldn’t tell him anything. He was about to commit a felony when Jackson finally strode inside.

  “Cole. Sorry, it took a little longer than anticipated to collect all the things from her Audi. SUV is likely totaled, and she had quite a bit packed.”