Protecting My Forever (Blackthorne Security Book 1)

by Nicole Vidal

  I shift so I can study his features in sleep. I turn my head to face him and lie flat on the mattress. I’ve seen different sides of Connor. Working Connor is fierce, protective, and hot as hell. He commands respect and attention from everyone in the room. My Connor—my Connor—is also protective and hot as hell, but he sees the real me. He understands why I hide behind Carys’s wig and why now I’m ready to take it off. I owe that to him. He saw the real me from the moment I slid my hand into his. Exactly like I saw all of him.

  “I feel you staring at me. What are you thinking about, beautiful?”

  “You. Us.”

  His gorgeous ocean-colored eyes open to look at me. “What about us?” He slides his hand to my waist and tightens his hold on me.

  “This is hands down the best date I’ve ever been on.”

  He smirks at me and kisses the top of my shoulder. “Me too. We aren’t finished though. We have more fun later this morning.”

  “What are you up to?”

  “You’ll have to wait and see. Are you going to share what you and Jake are up to?”

  I wrinkle my nose. “It’s a surprise. Let me take care of you. I don’t want to ruin it.”

  “It’s for me?”

  I set one hand in the center of his chest and push up to meet his mouth with mine. “Yes, it’s for you.”

  I can see the wheels in his mind working. That’s hot! I wet Connor’s lips with my tongue. He groans. Before I can explore his mouth, I’m flat on my back beneath him.

  “You like that?” I murmur.

  “Hell yes!” His rock-hard shaft near my hip is a strong indication as well.

  “How much time do we have before we need to leave?”

  He shakes his head. “Not enough for me to cherish you properly.”

  “Is there enough for you to take me hard and fast?” Before I can properly comprehend the challenge I threw down, Connor flips me onto my belly, pulls me onto my knees and forearms, and slides his hand down my belly to slip his fingers into my wetness.

  “Oh my….”

  After protecting us both, he replaces his fingers with one swift, hard thrust forward until he bottoms out inside me. Connor’s hands grip the flare of my hips as we sprint toward our release. As I push back, Connor moves forward. We fall over the edge at once and collapse onto the bed. Before I’m able to fully catch my breath, we’re moving toward the shower.

  Connor starts the scalding water. “In you go, gorgeous. I’m going to make us some coffee, and I’ll be back.” He kisses my lips and closes the door. When I’m about to shut off the water, the door swings open and Connor holds open a large towel for me.

  “My turn.”

  I step into the towel, turn, and kiss him again. He strips off his shorts and steps inside. I should be brushing out my hair, but instead I’m unabashedly staring at Connor taking a shower. Sweet mercy, he is gorgeous. You would think I would be disinterested considering it hasn’t even been an hour since we were together, but that is so far from the truth.

  He shuts off the water, and I attempt to rush out of the bathroom. In doing so, I knock his coffee into the sink. Luckily, I didn’t break the mug.

  “No need to rush out of here now. You might as well look without the glass in the way.”

  I feel my skin heat up. “You knew?”

  “Sweetheart, I was watching you for most of your shower too.”

  “You should’ve joined me.”

  He shakes his head. “Then we’d be later than we already are.” Connor draws me against his chest and kisses me until we’re both breathless.

  “Is it really a big deal?” I add some space between us.

  “Only for Norah to tease me a bit.”

  “I thought we were going on a date?”

  “You’re adorable when you think you won’t get what you want. We’ll be alone for most of the afternoon.”

  I smile. “What should I wear?”

  He raises an eyebrow.

  I know what he’s thinking. The same thing I am—nothing. That isn’t realistic if we’re going out.

  “Jeans and a hoodie will work.”

  Interesting. I slide past him but let my hand linger on his chest as I move. Watching Connor react to my touch is an exhilarating feeling. With fresh cups of coffee, we make it out the door and are headed toward our date.

  When we pull in front of the house at the compound, Norah is simply shaking her head with a huge smile on her face. Connor hugs her, and she mumbles something to him that I can’t make out. Whatever she said makes him hang his head.

  “Morning, Callie.” Norah steps closer and hugs me as well.

  “Hi, Norah.”

  I’m only partially focused on their conversation. because I’m taken with the serenity of their property. Words like perimeter alarm and lucky. Then she hands him a bag and retreats inside.

  “Ready, gorgeous?” Connor slides his arm around me and starts walking.

  “For?”

  “We’re going horseback riding and land hunting.”

  “Really?” My heart is pounding in my chest.

  He smiles one of his genuine, mega-watt smiles that make me melt into mush. “Yes, really. Jake sent me the maps right after we left yesterday. We were already coming to ride, so I added the choosing where to build part.”

  “Thank you, Connor.” He has no idea how much this means to me.

  “Yes, I do, gorgeous. It’s the same for me.” He lowers his lips to mine for a soft kiss as we enter the barn. “Have you ever ridden before?”

  “I have two horses, Pacey and Joey. I’m pretty good.”

  “Dawson’s Creek?”

  That show was absolutely tailored for teenage girls. I was a bit young, but it’s what the older girls chose to watch at the home. “Yes, how do you know that?”

  “Mara. She loved that show. Where are they now? Why not Dawson and Joey?”

  “They’re boarded at a farm in the next town over while I’m on tour. The Gradens are a cute older couple. They run the stables with the daughter, Cassidy, who is a bit older than you. As far as the names, while mutual interests and friendship are important in any romantic relationship, I felt they were more suited for one another than her and Dawson.”

  “You continue to surprise me. Would you like Lucky or Trix?”

  “Whichever is faster.” I wink at him and approach the two gorgeous horses in the barn. After a short greeting, we ride out of the barn and turn right, away from the house. Connor opts for Trix because he’s a bit bigger. Once we reach a clearing, I urge Lucky forward and surge past Connor in the large open field. We dismount and tie the horses to a tree.

  “Any reason you went this way?”

  “No, only the wide-open space to ride and the view of the river. Why?”

  “This is one of the areas where we can build. There are three spots on the property. There’s one that’s eight acres, a twelve, and a sixteen.” He clasps his hands on the small of my back.

  “What do you want to know?”

  That twinkle in his eyes is swoon-worthy. “What does a large family mean to you?”

  “That’s all you want to know?”

  He shakes his head. “I want to know everything.”

  I bared my soul to Connor like never before. No one else knows all of me like him. “You already know everything important.”

  “As do you.”

  “As crude a measurement as it may sound, I want it to be at least even but lean more toward adopted if it’s unbalanced. If we have three children, I want to adopt at least that many.”

  The look on his face is nothing short of awe. “Do you want to adopt, foster, or foster to adopt?”

  “I would only want to foster if adoption would be almost certain. I don’t know if I could handle losing a child who could be reunited with their parent. Is that horrible?” My question comes out in a whisper.

  “No, it’s honest and comes from a place of experience and heartbreak.”

  “Is that
something your mom could make happen?”

  He presses a kiss to the top of my head and slowly releases a deep breath. “Yes. I’m sure she would be honored when we ask for her assistance as well.”

  “Where are the other two spots?”

  “A little excited?”

  “No, I’m ecstatic and would love to find a way to not have to finish my tour. I’m ready to put Carys behind me.”

  “I’m immensely proud of you.” Tightening his hold on me, he lifts me into his arms. I wrap my legs around his waist and meet his lips with mine. The way Connor kisses me makes even our natural surroundings fall away. I can hear my heart pounding in my ears and his thumping against my hand on his chest. We ride to the other two lots and end up choosing where I went first. It’s the largest lot, which makes the most sense considering we’re going to need a large house. We snack on the food that Norah handed Connor upon our arrival and take a slow ride back to the barn. After feeding and praising Lucky and Trix, we plan to stop inside and say goodbye, but Jake and Norah aren’t home.

  After we have a quick dinner, we climb into bed to relax and talk about what our home needs.

  “What do you want in the house aside from a studio? Do you have a particular style you would prefer?”

  I smile up at him. “A bunch of bedrooms, a master suite with a fireplace, an office, a huge kitchen, and dining room. Maybe space for a pool later, although the river is nearby. As far as style, I would only eliminate contemporary, maybe cape as well. They always seem so small. What about you? Do you want your own office?”

  “I don’t need my own office. I would prefer to work from the office in town as often as possible. I’m sure we can share the space. Do you want the studio in the house or in a separate building?”

  “Separate, to maintain our privacy. Is it going to be an issue for workers to enter the premises?”

  “No, I’ll have to escort them from the gate to the studio. I’m going to need the specifications for the builder for the studio. What are your plans for tomorrow?” Connor asks.

  “After going over some billing emails from Olivia, spending time with you.”

  “Feel like going for a drive to your house?”

  Sharing my private space with Connor? Yes, please. “Sure. What do you need to check out?”

  “I want to check on the security and upgrade it as necessary for when your tour is over. We’ll need to stay there so you can record until our house and your new studio are finished.”

  “Sure. Can I make one small request?”

  “Anything you want, gorgeous.”

  “Can we ride instead of drive?”

  A grin graces his beautiful face. “Absolutely.”

  I burrow deeper into his loving embrace and fall into a deep sleep.

  .

  Chapter Thirty One

  Connor

  With my songbird’s arms tight around me, we ride down the scenic road near her home. The ride this morning is peaceful. Her home a little less than two hours from mine, is set away from the street. It’s strikingly similar to the compound but with less acreage. It provides privacy, but so far limited to no security measures. At a minimum, she needs a perimeter alarm, especially since she doesn’t want a gate and won’t be here very long. She won’t be here without me beside her either.

  I follow her inside the house and wait for her to disarm the alarm system. Once that’s complete and I relax a small amount, I’m immediately struck by the décor. It’s modern and comfortable but more feminine than my place. It’s bright with splashes of color on the couches and the walls. It’s her. I mean Calliope, not Carys. It’s the woman I see when I look at her.

  “Do you want a tour, or would you like to wander yourself?” She’s leaning against the kitchen island.

  “Do you have something to do?”

  “No, I don’t want to interrupt.”

  “You couldn’t. I feel like part of me is missing if you aren’t within arm’s reach.”

  She slips her fingers into mine and starts moving. “Let’s start your tour in the master?” She throws a sultry look over her shoulder and leads me into her bedroom.

  Doesn’t she realize I’ll follow her anywhere? After a brief scan of the room, I climb over her on the bed and slowly examine every detail of her luscious curves in excruciating detail. Over an hour later, we continue the tour of her house. I scan the guest bedrooms with passing glances. She pauses after she steps into her office. It has the standard desk, chair, desk phone, and cords ready for charging. I notice what gives her pause as I scan the room a second time. There’s an acrylic box on the shelf behind her desk. It contains shards of something and a bent engraved plate. It takes me a few moments to place the broken pieces. It’s the box that Tristan destroyed with her parents’ monogram. Beside it is a photo of a couple on their wedding day. I push her hair over to her other shoulder before I drop a kiss on her neck, slide my arms around her and draw her close. “Your parents?”

  All she can do is nod.

  “I’m sure you saw the picture of Mara in my office.”

  She turns in my arms, resting her head on my chest. “I did. She was beautiful.” Her words are muffled by my shirt.

  “She was both inside and out. I’m sure you could say the same for your parents.”

  “I can, at least the parts I remember.”

  We remain still for some time before she rises and presses a soft kiss to my lips. After a deep sigh, she leads me out of her office to the studio. Honestly, I have no idea what I’m looking at, but being in the space gives me an idea of what she needs as far as dimensions and interior walls. She will need a soundproof space and the control area as well.

  “Can I ask you something?”

  She turns with her fingers gliding across the soundboard in front of her.

  “Where are your awards?”

  Calliope exhales sharply. “I could ask you the same thing.”

  “How do you…?”

  “There’s no way you and Jake weren’t awarded medals for your heroic actions in Afghanistan. I have a vault in the basement. What about you?”

  “I’m not a hero, Calliope. I accepted them and put them in a drawer in my office. The Purple Heart and Silver Star are still in the cases from the ceremony. I haven’t opened them since they were presented to me.”

  “Why do you hide your awards?”

  “I didn’t attempt to save Jones, Carter, Adams, and the others for a medal. I did it because I expected them to do it for me. I did it for their families. I don’t need a reminder that I survived and they didn’t.”

  “You think you failed them and shouldn’t earn a medal for doing so, don’t you?”

  I’m floored. Pushing down the lump in my throat, I answer honestly. “No one other than Jake has ever understood my feelings about the medals, let alone articulated them so succinctly. What’s your reasoning?”

  “It’s similar. I’m earning awards but not as myself. I’m hiding who I truly am as Carys. The awards are hers, not mine.”

  “That’s where you’re wrong. She is a part of you. The voice is you. The image and the genre may not be what you want to sing going forward, but they are your accomplishments. It’s you sharing your incredible voice with the world, not Carys. Carys isn’t real. You are.”

  I reach forward and swipe the single tear trailing down her cheek before hauling her into my arms. “You deserve every single award you earned whether you’re wearing a colorful wig or not. You have overcome challenges beyond what anyone should endure in three lifetimes, let alone a portion of one. Wanting to protect your true self at the same time doesn’t make you any less worthy. I will protect you from your fears, Calliope. I will stand with you in the sun and in the rain.” I almost add as long as I live, but don’t.

  “I have no words for how you make me feel. No one has ever seen me as completely as you.” I love you, Connor.

  She’s wrong about the words. I can read her thoughts even though she’s fighting them. I
love you completely, Calliope. I won’t push her any more than I already have today. She’ll tell me when she’s ready. I hold her in my arms in the quiet of her studio until she’s ready to move.

  “Do you want to stay here or ride back tonight?” I murmur against her temple.

  “Can we stay?”

  “Anything you want. We need some food though.”

  Sheer joy materializes in her eyes.

  “Why didn’t you tell me you wanted to come here sooner?”

  She shakes her head. “I didn’t know how much I wanted it until you stepped into my home.”

  “Fair enough. Can you show me where the control box is for your alarm system? Also, do you have a map of your property here?”

  She presses a chaste kiss to my lips and leads me into the basement. It’s impossible to miss the vault. It’s approximately three feet wide and five feet deep. I’ll add it to the information for the builder once I finish checking her security system.

  “Is this hardwired or to a cell phone?”

  “It’s hardwired, and it also alerts my cell and Bruce’s. I’ll change that as soon as we get back upstairs. There’s a map in the strong box in my office.”

  I nod. “Who owns the house?”

  She shoots me a look that I can only described as confused. “I do.”

  “I mean is it you personally, your corporation, or something else?”

  “Sorry, the title is held by my corporation. I used the money from my trust to buy the house once I was an adult.”

  “What trust?” There was no reason for me to review her personal financial status. It wasn’t necessary then, and it isn’t now.

  Her eyes flutter closed.

  I move in front of her and take her hands in mine. “You don’t have to share. Other than the fact that you’re the CEO of your corporation and your last corporate financial statement, there was nothing financial in your file that I needed to know.”

  “You didn’t read it?”

  “No, it doesn’t impact my ability to provide security for you.”

  “Thank you. I appreciate that. My parent’s employer gave money to each of the families after the attack. Since I was in the foster system, they created a trust for me that I gained access to when I turned eighteen. About the same time, I signed my contract with Madeleine and received a signing bonus, I started receiving distributions. The corpus was released to me when I turned twenty-five.”