Rent Boy

by James Anthony Ford

  We never got to a recovery party earlier then 10 or 12 pm, it was way too uncool to do so. When we arrived at Uranus, for this particular Red Raw recovery, the entrance to the club was always a back alley entrance. That was part of its underground grungy feel. Then we walked inside the club and at first we could not a damn thing. The sunshine from outside and the sudden darkness from inside the club blinded you for a few minutes. All you could hear was the thumping sound of the bass and the small of the smoke machines. Soon we were greeted by other ‘so called friends’, to me they were only really club world friends. They greeted us with the usual

  “Oh my god!”, “It’s so good to see you, I love you!” kiss, kiss, hug, hug.

  It was all about how drugs create strange over the top friendships. It was all very superficial but what the hell, we just wanted to have fun, and I wanted to party!

  When i arrived inside the club I headed straight for the dance floor which could feel the music, so loud, it was vibrating. I just left my friends behind, huddled in a corner, and I just wanted to dance. It was clubs like this that no one really dance opposite each other, it was actually consider a bit daggy, everyone was high and everyone just wanted to groove. After a while your vision became clearer and you started to see that everyone was smiling at you. I was just happy and happy for others, life was so great at that time. I wish I could feel like this forever, so I swallowed another ‘e’, right on the dance floor. People saw, but it was not shocking to anyone there, they were in the know as well. People did drugs all over the club even with security walking around, they didn’t care. Nor did I. I just wanted to party so hard now until I literally drop and my body says no more. Then Kim found me spotted me and started dancing towards me with a huge beautiful smile on her face.

  Kim laughed and knew this was my happy song and she started to sing along with me. The people around didn’t seem to care that we were sort of making fools of ourselves. Kim didn’t care she knew that was my happy song and the only time I sing it was when I was genuinely happy and content. Kim realised the true meaning of this silly pointless song and wanted to share in my happiness. We were happy together and danced the night, or I should say, day away.

  As hours went by and after peaking again on the dance floor, I was approached by a couple of hot looking guys but had to turn them back. I just said no thanks, I was way too out of it. It was a shame as they were hot and there goes missed opportunities. So at the time I didn’t care, it was all about the clubs and drugs. Time ticks over so quick inside club land it’s monumental. By the time we knew it, it was 3 in the afternoon, the club was still pumping, about 3 quarters full. It was still going off, but Kim wanted to go to another club called the ‘Megabar’.

  Now the ‘Megabar’ is not considered a gay club, but a lot gay people go there. It is an inner city based club. I’m not going to comment on what seedy sort of business took place in this once fashionable club as it has nothing to do with me. I was always a little apprehensive in walking into ‘Megabar’. It was always quite bright in there but the patrons were a bit different. Most of them were mixing their drugs with a lot of alcohol which led to a lot of fights and brawls there. I tried my best not to rub anyone else the wrong way there. They were a lot of steroid buffed guys there too with serious attitude problems. You did not want to walk in their way. But we partied on inside, mainly on the upstairs dance floor. The music was pretty good still, garage and funky house. This club was also the favourite of Kim’s new boyfriend at the time. His name was Martin. He didn’t come to the dance with us as he was working so we met him at ‘Megabar’. He was actually a security guard during his day job. He was a good looking guy and exactly my type. He was definitely straight though and there was no way anyone could change that. I never told Kim that I had the hots for her boyfriend. It just wouldn’t be right. He was a tall and stocky muscular guy, looks intimidating at first but he is actually the sweetest guy you could ever meet. He was simply a nice genuine and down to earth guy. Kim should be flattered with a man like that. He was perfect, and perfect for her. He treated Kim like gold. He even found it quite amusing that a lot of people think Kim and I were boyfriend and girlfriend as we acted so close in the clubs. But Martin never felt threatened by that. That’s the kind of guy he was, he was just a kind soul. I wish I could have a man like he was.

  Anyway, soon 5 pm arrives. Yes, it was Sunday! Still going strong, a bit over the music in this club and I could see there were a few dickheads in the club starting to brew trouble. There was going to be another one of those infamous brawls which were always featured in the news. I wanted no part of and was a little terrified. I believe some of them even carried weapons on them. So I told Kim and Martin I am out!

  “Let’s go back to Uranus!” I said with a panic to Kim.

  “No, no, no, I wanna stay here, don’t worry them James, they won’t come near you, just stay out of their way” Kim pleaded.

  “Maybe we should go” said Martin.

  “NO! I’m stayin’ here” Kim bited back.

  “Well, I’m goin’ back to Uranus then, by myself “I said under my breath.

  “Okay,....but be careful!” Kim said as she gave me a gentle hug and kiss and I gave Martin a hug and I felt the club.

  I hailed a taxi right outside the club where they were lined up waiting to take home all the tragic party goers. I was included. I’m the cab I managed look at my eyes in the mirror and my pupils were huge. Massive in fact and I was chewing on my gum at 100 kilometres an hour. I was still feeling good and wanted to keep dancing, even on my own, I didn’t care. So cab driver!, take me to Commercial road, Prahran and step on it! I’ve got a party to go to man!

  I arrive back at Uranus and it was about 5:30 pm Sunday afternoon and was hoping the club was still going. And it was. I rocked up the back alley entrance and they security staff smiled at me as if to say “ he here he comes again, off his face”, then I flashed my pass-out stamp on the back of my hand and proceeded inside following the thumping sound of funky bass. The club was still half full but you could see that the atmosphere was toning down a bit. I thin everyone was starting to come down and they have had their fill of recreational drugs for the weekend. But people were still dancing, on the dance floor, on tables and chairs and on the bar while stripping their clothes off. At this time it was only the hard-core party animals that remained here. We were the ‘it’ people. The die -hard party people and I felt like I was a part of that sub culture, like a societal group of special people. I had taken my fifth ecstasy pill and then ‘BANG!” I was hard at the dance floor. Totally going off. I was a good dancer and people always liked to watch me dance. I always got comments that I danced well. It was flattering but I tried not to let my pride show. I felt like the whole club was watching me dance to this fantastic dirty deep house. It was dirty, sexy bump and grind hard garage. It was so cool it just consumes you. The music was just so cool. And I let it show. I could see the DJ standing behind his decks watching me dance with a sweet smile on his face. I wanted to look at him a bit closer to see what DJ it was as I was quite familiar with DJ names and stuff. He was an international guest DJ and had been playing a five hour set and was still going. I danced closer to the DJ station and noticed he was hot. As he was spinning the decks and I dance my guts out were didn’t take our eyes off each other. I was still as horny as fuck and didn’t care about anything. My mental state was like I was in another world but I was still conscious of my surrounding. I was however, drug fucked. Totally. But it felt good. I didn’t even think about the thing I did. I just did it with complete confidence. It was drugs that were controlling my brain now. Somehow the DJ and I never spoke a word to each other, the music was too loud anyway, we seemed to both know what we wanted without saying anything. So I proceeded to crawl underneath the DJ decks. The DJ was standing there and nudged his crotch closer to me and proceeded to unzip his pants. In complete and utter fulfilment I gave him oral sex for about 30 minutes. He then returned the favour in a t
oilet cubicle. Now I have something to feel guilty about. It wasn’t until I went back on the dance floor at 6.30 pm that I realized that I have crossed taboo boundaries. I think I was out of control and the feeling of guilt suddenly shook me. So I decided I had to go home. Enough was enough, I’ve had my fill and I’m all partied out. So it was Time to make my way home. Before I do something crazy, well, even more crazy.

  As I staggered my way out of the club, there were other clubbers lying all over the alleyway, completely out of it and looking very, very tragic. The girls’ eyeliner were running down their cheeks, some guys fake tan was stained on their white shorts. It was just complete tragedy. But that’s club land. I too was apart of the tragic end to a night of our lives. Everyone was still with either with a lollipop in their mouths or chewing gum in a very fast rhythm. I was the gum chewer. I didn’t want a taxi home. I decided to walk. The evening summer air felt so good against my skin. I also wanted to continue walking around with my top off to show off my bronzed chiselled abs and chest. Yes, I was very shallow. But I really just wanted to enjoy a slow wander, or stagger home, coming down off my drugs but still as high as a kite. The come down was as smooth as silk.

  As I walk down the streets I see families playing in the playgrounds. I laughed and kept thinking how normal they were. I saw people just walking down the street with their grocery shopping and thinking how normal and boring they look. It was like I could not believe how anyone could prefer a life like I was leading versus normality. Down the streets as I walked I got stares. Everyone looked at me as if to say “I know what he has been up to”. Some even whistled at me as they drove in cars. I was feeding off that attention and wanted more. So I decided to take the long way home and walk around the botanic gardens area, nice and slow, just enjoying the mild euphoria and the evening sun.

  Although most of the looks I was getting were sexy looks, there the odd few, like the older elderly people, looked at me like I was some sort of freak. As I walked past them they moved right out of my path so I don’t accidentally touch them, that would be horrible! By the way, I was being sarcastic. Yes, you could catch my party animal disease, you bunch of normal boring dickheads!, which was what I was thinking at the time. But I really didn’t give a shit what people were thinking. I wanted people to know that I have been out all night and partied all day. I was proud of that. After every party and recovery party it gave me a sense of achievement. Like I gave the performance of my life and i feel as though I deserve an Oscar.

  It was such a good feeling after having partied all night and all day, not only just because still made you keep buzzing for a day or so later, but it was like a job well done and worth all the stress in the lead up to the party. As I was strolling down the street of South Yarra, keeping in mind I lived in Fitzroy and knew that I had a long walk home, I was reminiscing about the good times we just had and had a huge smile on my face.

  This song was my anthem and no one could take that away from me. Even though I took the words from the classic song “I love rock and roll”, the word that I replaced with ‘sausage rolls’, not because it rhymed, it did, but because it was a metaphor. Sausage rolls had no reference to food or sex. To me, sausage rolls meant a few things. Firstly it was like a symbol of Aussie masculinity, you know, like meat pies and sausage rolls. Secondly it just sounded like a comical aspect, like it was funny, just innocent silliness. I was in search of both, the perfect Aussie male and genuine happiness. I was getting close, but I don’t think I ever got there. Yet.

  About an hour later, not having walked so far from the club, I was strolling down the streets of South Yarra and I was thinking how even after a few full sex sessions in the night and day just gone I was still as horny as fuck. That’s what drugs, especially ecstasy, made you like. You just ask anyone who has taken the drug and they will tell you. It’s not an urban myth. It was an aphrodisiac, mainly when you are coming down from the peak. Then ironically something happened which will never be forgotten and is way up there with the most amazing of events in my life. What I am about to tell you is sacred. This was opening Pandora’s box and I can’t believe how this happened. To me and why? This was about to become every gay man’s fantasy and it happened to me. I still wonder why me?

  So..........

  I, like I said earlier was wondering around the road lining the edge of the Botanic Gardens, which the locals call ‘The Tan’, and there was a black sporty BMW curb crawling me. I realised it was curb crawling as it drove past me once quite slowly, then again the other side of the road even more slowly. Then once the car got a few metres away, it came to a sudden halt. Like the driver suddenly jammed the brakes on therefore making the back of the car jump slightly. There were only a few other joggers around so no one really took notice of the car suddenly stopping in the middle of the road, and there was hardly any traffic anyway. I got a funny feeling that I was been followed but was not sure and just kept on walking but I slowed my pace. As I got closer to the car, which was still stationery, I began to get some horrible thoughts which is unusual when you are feeling so good. I thought perhaps this person was a psycho. Perhaps he or she is a homophobic, or a serial killer, and the list just went on filling my head full of crazy stuff. So I got nervous and picked up the pace a little so I could just keep on walking past the car. As I approached the car, I was trying not to look at it, but I noticed at the corner of my eye the dark shaded driver’s window started to roll down. Even the vision at the corner of my eye told me the guy was hot looking. So I looked directly at him. He looked familiar but it never clicked. Even though by nature I am quite shy, I don’t even know how I did this but I gave him a sexy kind of smile. I remember it well. Then he spoke from across the road in the driver’s seat, “Howz it goin?”. Then I replied, “Yeah good mate” trying to sound as masculine as possible. “You been out all night have ya?” he said immediately. “mmmm, .....yeah” I said in a sexy manly voice. It was during only those few seconds of small talk I kept thinking in the back of my mind, I have seen him before but I can’t recall who he is. We then had a moment of three seconds where we both had nothing to say and where just staring at each other. Those three seconds felt like hours, I swear, it was such an awkward moment. Then bang!!!! It couldn’t be? It’s not! It is!!! I know you are dying to know who it was but I respect his privacy and this was a situation so sacred that I cannot possibly reveal his name. But all I can say is that he was in the Aussie rules football side of things, and that is all I can say. Well, at least I think he was, I am still to this day still not that completely sure. It still feels like I dreamed it. Perhaps it was too good to be true as it felt too surreal. He is well known and he is really hot, even more so in person. But I really cannot, and will not, reveal the name as this would open up a whole new can of worms. I respect his privacy. Anyway, after those three seconds and I realised who he was I literally felt my knees go weak. I also felt my heart starting to race. I was hoping, or dreaming that he would say the following words and he did. “You wanna lift?” “Fucking hell!” I murmured under my breath so he couldn’t hear. I didn’t even answer, I was too shocked and so very, very nervous. I just walked across the road and went straight to the passenger side, got in the car and closed it. I was not even thinking about what I was about to do, I was in a trance like state. I noticed as soon as I got in the car he looked straight at my pecs. I felt a bit awkward as I was sitting there with my top off, all bronzed and oiled up, a bit of glitter stuck on part of my body and face which rubbed off from someone and feeling pretty trashed. But some reason his fame meant nothing, he was just another man. I felt like I had cross into his territory and any sort of celebrity status meant nothing. It’s hard to explain but as soon as I got in the car, he no longer looked like a famous sports star. He was no longer untouchable. He was just a man, a hot guy with emotions and desires. I didn’t care who he really was, if he was who I thought he was, I just wanted his body. “Where you live?” he asked with a slight smile. “Fitzroy” I replied with a n
ervous tone. But he just sat there for a few seconds without even driving, just looking directly ahead. I noticed that he was getting nervous as he was clearing his throat and his hands were beginning to shake. I was wondering what on Earth are you thinking. I thought this might not be good. Like it was something more sinister. But then he started up the car and accelerated without driving. I just kept thinking to myself as I was staring at the bulge on his crotch. Just do it. Just touch me, just do it, do it, do it, do it, do it.........I then noticed his bulge began to grow as he was staring directly at my chest and abs. He was getting an erection. And so was I. The atmosphere in the car grew so steamy that you could smell sex in the air. I just wanted to pounce on him so bad, it hurt. Then the silence was broken and he spoke again “You have a hot bod mate, you work out?” . “yeah,...I do” I said. “You obviously work out too, I mean, you play sport......don’t you” I said trying not to think I knew his celebrity sports status. I just played dum. He just smiled, gave a bit of a giggle, and started to breathe heavier. “Wanna go somewhere?” he asked me as he was trying to hide his guilt. I didn’t answer, I just had to go for it. I couldn’t help myself. I was feeling out of control. So I slowly started to rub his pulsating crotch. Then he panicked and said “Not in the car!” “We’ll go over there” he said as he was point to a nearby toilet block. We both immediately got out of the car and it was strange. We both knew the drill. We both just jogged to the toilet block. He was obviously very nervous and was worried being seen by someone. He kept looking around and over his shoulder making sure no one was watching. I was doing the same just to give the impression that I too was concerned about his privacy. But the reality was, I wanted someone to see. I mean, why would you not want to be seen with a guy like this?