by Amanda Heath
“I’m waiting, Spencer,” she states, with a bit of irritation.
“I’m trying to figure out where to begin.” I shake my head nervously before saying anything else. “You make me so unsure of myself. I’m at a loss of where to even begin.” I sigh and look up into her dark blue eyes. “I know that we didn’t have a real relationship before...you know.” I lift my fingers up and do quotation marks around real. “I don’t think either of us thought we would have anything with the other. That’s not the case, at least, not with me. I have wanted you for as long as I can remember. It used to scare me how much I did. I think that’s why I always played pranks on you. Maybe it started as harmless flirting, but it turned into a way to keep you at a distance.
Then you came back this summer and we got shoved down each other’s throats. I was just so tired of the bullshit and pretending that you weren’t all I was thinking about. When I finally got you where I wanted you, you got ripped out of my arms. What happened to you was so horrible. I didn’t even want to think about what you would have to go through. Mixed with what Dylan said to me that night, I couldn’t handle it. I didn’t mean to sleep with her, Harley, it just happened before I even realized what was going on. I didn’t even enjoy it. She wasn’t you. She didn’t have your hair, your eyes, you’re body. Her personality is different, way different. She wasn’t you. She is a troll compared to you, honestly. What I’m trying to say is, I also figured out I was in love with you that night. I didn’t know how to handle that either. I mean, how could a guy like me really hang on to you?” I feel her soft thumbs brush something off my cheek. I look down at them and see liquid. Am I crying again?”
Chapter 21
Harley
I feel the shell around my heart crack. Spencer Grady is bawling his eyes out right in front of me. I don’t hesitate to wiggle over to him. I throw my arms over his hard shoulders and push his head onto my shoulder. His strong arms come around my waist and I almost let out a sigh. To be touched without fear is something I don’t think I will ever get used to again, and Spencer takes that fear away from me.
I know he didn’t mean to hurt me, but hurt me he did. He hurt me very badly. I think I cried myself to sleep for the past month because of it. Now, of course, who did I want to come comfort me? Spencer. I haven’t totally forgiven him. He’s going to have to work on that part, but I think after his admission I know where his head was at. I mean, I kicked him so hard I dislocated his shoulder while I thought he was trying to rape me. Doesn’t matter if I really thought it was Dylan; he got hurt in the back lash of what happened to me.
“It’s okay, Spencer. You think too low of yourself. It’s a wonder you’re still sniffing around my skirts. You know what you did was wrong. I can see that now. It just might take some time before I forgive you for it. Or maybe I won’t forgive; either way...I love you, too.” I stopped breathing when I said that. Fucking shit. That was not supposed to come out!
He looks up at me with those pale eyes and they feel with an emotion I can’t read. I know that it grips my heart and won’t let it go. “I knew that already,” he says.
He chuckles at my reaction and I smack him on his chest. “How the hell did you know that?” He gives me a smirk. I feel like I could drop dead from the way it lights up his sad face. “You yelled it at me about a month ago. I guess you didn’t realize that you even said it.” He takes a hand off of my waist and pushes a loose lock of hair behind my ear.
I shiver with the depth of emotion I see when I look into his eyes. It’s an unconscious decision when I lean in and brush my lips across his. He lets out a small gasp, but doesn’t pull away. I don’t either and I really don’t know what that says about me. The guy did cheat on me. His soft lips move under mine and his tongue swipes out, asking for permission, which I stupidly give him.
He probes my tongue with his and I let out a moan from deep in my throat. He responds with one of his own. He moves his hands from my waist, putting them on face, where he caresses my cheeks with his thumbs. I feel him start to lean forward, pushing me back, as he devours my lips.
My head gently hits the rack on the back of the four-wheeler as Spencer repositions my legs over his own legs. His hands leave my face to remove mine from the back of his neck. He curls one hand with mine and lifts it over my head. The other one lands on my thigh and goes up to the edge of my shorts.
I cringe when he maneuvers a finger under the fabric. I know what is going to come next. He freezes when he realizes I’m wearing panties.
“Why did you get panties?” He black eyebrows furrow together in confusion. I sigh and answer him,
“I didn’t want to flaunt easy access anymore. I’m sorry if you don’t like it.” I cringe when I hear the voice of a scared little girl escape from my lips in saying this.
Understanding dawns on his face and he gives me a quick kiss before moving his finger even closer to my sex. “Well, underwear or no underwear, you’re still fucking hot to me.” My breathing becomes shallow as he slips his index finger under the cotton underwear. He nuzzles into my cheek and down to my ear before whispering, “I love it when you get all wet for me, baby girl.”
I shudder as my eyes roll back in my head. It feels like it has been a hundred years since Spencer has touched me like this. I have to say, I’m quite addicted. I arch my back into him when he slips his finger inside of me. He slowly thrusts it in and out, driving me crazy.
“Please...Spencer, please.” He knows what I want. I beg him anyway. His middle finger slips into me as well and I let out a hard groan. His thumb finally settles on my swollen nub and rubs ever so gently. “Is that what you want, baby girl?” He asks as he thrusts his fingers harder into me.
I feel my free hand clutch onto his shoulders hard. My nails are digging into his exposed skin. “Harder, Spencer. Harder!” I almost yell out at him. This isn’t our first rodeo; he knows exactly what I like. It’s driving me stupid that he won’t give it to me. I hear him hiss as I dig my nails into him even harder. He finally rubs his thumb harder against me and my head thrashes from side to side.
Spencer
She is so damn gorgeous. It’s hard to look at her when she is like this.
Her pale skin is flushed from her desire. Her dark blue eyes are wild when she has them open. Her auburn hair is all over the place. If I had a hand free I would be running it through that magnificent hair.
She is so wet, so turned on, you can fucking feel it in the air. I’m drunk on it. My dick is as hard as a rock, but I don’t plan on using it. I just got her to consider forgiving me, I’m not about to take advantage of the situation. No, this is all about her.
I know she is close and I almost want to prolong it, but that wouldn’t be fair. This is something that Dylan tried to take away from her. I would never deny her it. I trail kisses down her neck, swiping my tongue here and there. I make my way up to her ear and trace the shell with my lips. I feel her shiver under me and smile. “I love you, Harley.” That pushes her over. She cries out my name, cumming all over my hand.
Damn, that felt way better than most of the actual sex I have had. She looks up at me with glazed over eyes and breaks into a huge smile. “Thank you,” she says softly. I can’t help but smirk at her, which earns me a slap on the chest. “You ass.”
“It was my pleasure, baby girl.” I sit up and pull her up with me. I kiss her lips softly before letting go of her. “Are you ready to head back? “ I ask.
She smiles and nods. I’m overjoyed to see that smile on her face again. You don’t know how much I have missed it. I turn around and sit the right way on the four-wheeler. Shortly after, I feel her put her arms tightly around my waist and I get a big goofy grin on my face.
*****
My high from the ride with Harley dies quickly when we arrive back at the tents. Every single one of our friends is standing in a line waiting for us. The girls all look scared and the guys look like they want to kill someone. I really hope it’s not me. “What the fuck are y’
all doing? You look like the Mickey Mouse Club on acid,” Harley says from behind me. We quickly get off the ATV and I grab her hand before walking over to the group. I walk over to Dean since he will tell me what is really going on before anyone else would.
He looks at Harley and shakes his head. What the hell? Lucy walks up to us and whispers something in Harley’s ear. Harley nods and pulls her hand out of mine. I try to pretend my skin doesn’t feel cold without her touch. They walk off toward Lucy and Mason’s tent. When they enter it I turn back to Dean. “So?”
“Harley’s dad called Lucy’s cell phone. Apparently he didn’t realize that we would be with such a crowd this weekend and started to panic.”
I get a horrible feeling in the pit of my stomach. I somehow know exactly what he is going to say. “He didn’t feel the need to let anyone know that Dylan made bail.” Even though I knew it was coming, all the color drains out of my face and my knees hit the ground.
“He’s been...” I clear my throat which feels like I swallowed a damn frog. “He’s been out this whole time?” I can’t believe that Richard would keep something like this from all of us. “How could we not have known?”
Paige walks up to us and puts a comforting hand on my shoulder. “Her dad got a restraining order on him when he got out. Since he was caught in the act, they didn’t even have to fight the judge on it.
Richard thought she was safe at the house with someone always being there. This though, how are we supposed to protect her here if he shows up?”
“I called my boys in. We don’t have anything to worry about. They love Harley like a little sister and would protect her with their lives. That sick fuck isn’t getting anywhere near her if he happens to show his face,” Mason says to us before anyone else can reply. “You need to tell her, though. We aren’t hiding it from her.” He glares at me before continuing. “Knowing this one here, he’ll piss her off and she will run away and straight into danger.” He doesn’t say anything else before stalking off toward his tent. This is just fucking great.
Chapter 22
Harley
They are so stupid if they think I don’t know what they are talking about. They had better not be giving Spencer a hard time for running off with me. He may have done something bad, but that doesn’t mean he is a bad guy.
“So...back together?” Lucy asks. We are sitting in their huge tent. Figures the drug lord would have a huge tent. Spencer and I got stuck with the small, ugly green one.
“Sort of. I haven’t forgiven him yet, but I know where his head was at now. He keeps telling me that he loves me. It’s kind of hard to turn him down.” I shrug my shoulders and wait for her reaction.
“Good. I was worried you were going to mope around the rest of your life.” Huh? I look over at her and notice the evil grin on her face.
“What is that supposed to mean?” I say lying down on an air mattress in the tent. I cross my ankles and wait for her answer. She comes to lie down next to me and laces her fingers with mine. Her black hair is feathered out around her head in wild curls and her caramel skin looks much darker next to my pale skin. “I know you haven’t ever seen it, but you two are meant for each other. You have talked non-stop about the guy for most of your life. We all just ignored you and let you have your fun. I was surprised, yeah, when he kissed you that first time, but that was only because I didn’t think y’all would ever get around to it.” She looks over at me and smirks.
I roll my eyes. “I’m glad everyone seems to think they know everything.” I sigh and turn on my side to face her. “I know what you mean, though. I have always been drawn to him. I was just scared of getting too close to him and getting hurt, which is what happened anyway. Hard as I try, though...Spencer is all I think about. I want to be with him, but he hurt me so bad and I don’t know how to forgive that.”
I feel Lucy’s fingers brush my face and I guess I started crying; crying at the injustice of it all. I guess people are just put into your life to hurt you and all those around you. I know what Dylan did was the catalyst for what Spencer did. “I know he screwed up...literally...but he is sorry. You can see that in his eyes. He really does love you. If you don’t believe anything else, believe that. Love is something worth fighting for. I don’t think he would ever hurt you like that again. He made a mistake...he’s a guy and they are far from perfect.” Lucy smooth’s her hand over my hair as she talks and it feels nice: Something I miss from a mother I barely remember.
Before I can even say anything to Lucy, Mason bursts through the tent flaps followed closely by Spencer. My heartbeat picks up when I see the grim looks in their eyes. “What’s going on?” I ask. I feel Lucy get tense next to me. Great, she knows, too. “Why the fuck can’t y’all just tell me? I’m not going to break or kill myself if you have bad news. I mean, seriously, I’m sure worse things have happened than what you are going to tell me.”
Spencer comes into the tent and sits down on the ground next to me. I take in his pale face. His short black locks look like he has been running his hands through them a lot. He picks up my hand and I get a feeling of dread in my stomach. “Your dad called. He forgot to inform anyone that Dylan made bail. He knew you would be safe at your house with someone always there, but out here? Yeah, anything could happen. I’m thinking we could head home in a little bit. What do you think?”
I know my face is paler than usual. I know my heartbeat picked up, but I’m not going to let him ruin my fun out here. Dylan is no longer something I fear. He may have taken my strength away from me, but I got it back on my own. I refused to let anything that happened to me this summer break me completely. “No. I’m not hiding from him. He’s not going to hurt me with all of you around. You and Dean beat the shit out of him that night. Everyone knows that Mason is here...and he’s a freaking mob boss for crying out loud.”
Spencer looks back at Mason and mouths “Mob boss?” Mason chuckles and shrugs his shoulders: ever the evader. “Okay. We will stay here, but I don’t think it is a good idea.”
“It will be fine. Besides, I want to stick around and watch people play in the mud.
Spencer
I feel jumpy to say the least. The whole time we stayed out to watch the fun I was scanning the faces around me for one I know all too well. One I hoped to never have to see again. I didn’t see him, but that didn’t make my unease any better. Dylan only has revenge on his mind. Harley tried to make us all think it wasn’t bothering her, but the quick glances around the crowd and the tense way she is holding her body says otherwise.
I had a part of my body touching her at all times. She never pushed me away so I guess it was okay with her. The crowd had turned into one big orgy after a while. Cheap alcohol mixed with a bunch of girls in bathing suits makes for a good time, I guess. I wouldn’t know since I didn’t drink a lick and Harley is wearing denim shorts and a light black tee shirt. Her auburn hair was pulled up, making me want to lean over and nibble on her neck. I actually did at one point and she sighed and arched her neck closer to my mouth. That made me smile, but I really didn’t want to push it, so I backed off.
After a while, she got bored with the mudding (and the orgy) and decided to go back to the tent. I followed, but she didn’t seem to mind. She clutched my hand the whole way and I felt content in the fact that she was still touching me.
Now we are lying around the small tent on our own sleeping bags. It was quiet between us for a while, but she seemed to want to talk about ourselves. For starters, she asked what my major is. “How could you not know that?” I respond, stunned that we have never talked about this before.
“I don’t know. I just don’t. Answer the question.” She smirks and hits me with a pillow.
“Fine,” I sigh before answering. “Management; It’s a 120 hour program for a bachelor’s degree. I can work in Financial Institutions, Government Agencies, Healthcare Industry, Manufacturing Firms, Nonprofit Organizations, and Service Industries. I like the planning, reporting, and budgeting of it. I know
it’s nothing big and impressive like a lawyer or a doctor, but I really enjoy it.”
She gives me a soft smile that I can barely make out in the dark tent. “That’s cool. Definitely not something I would have seen you go for.
I shrug my shoulders and chuckle. “Me either. I kind of flopped around the first month until they put me in an accounting class, which I loved. That’s when I asked what I could do with it. They pointed me to management.”
I roll over onto my stomach and turn my face toward her. “Anyway, what is yours?”
She rolls over to her side to face me now. “I’m undecided. I kind of like art history, but there’s not much around here I can do with that. I’ll come up with something, though. What does the tattoo on your back mean?”
I laugh out loud at her change in topic. “It’s for courage. I was scared to leave for college because I didn’t want to leave Mom alone for 4 years. I almost didn’t apply for college in the first place. So, she took me to get it and told me to stop being the cowardly lion.” I blush, thinking about the fact that I haven’t ever told anyone that story.
She gives me a huge grin and says, “That’s really sweet. Who know you were a big softy?” I roll over to her side of the tent and rise up to tickle her. She smacks my hands away after a minute, breathless and flushed a gorgeous red. I don’t even think as I cover my body with hers and press my lips to hers. She sighs around them and puts her arms around my neck, pressing us even closer together. Our tongues meet as I pull her leg up over my hip, pressing my groin into her warm heat. My dick is hard and straining toward her. I wish we weren’t wearing any clothes. Oh, the bliss of being naked!
I push my hand up under her dark shirt to get a feel of her creamy, smooth skin. She moans when I cup her tit and rub my thumb across her erect nipple. Her back arches, eliminating what’s left of the space between us. I start to lift her shirt up, but she lets out a blood-curdling scream. That’s when I feel something metal pushed against my head.