Penn, Jenny - Rachel's Seduction [Cattleman's Club] (Siren Publishing Ménage Everlasting)

by Rachel's Seduction (lit)

  “Come on, boys.” Duncan nodded toward the door. “I think we were just dismissed.”

  They didn’t save their laughter for the hallway but spilled out of the room, chuckling and throwing out more lines to amuse each other with. Adam didn’t care what they said as long as they left him alone with Killian. He wanted to have a few words with his partner.

  They started with, “What the hell do you think you were doing out there?”

  “What?” Killian appeared honestly startled by Adam’s intrusion. Looking over his shoulder as he pulled out a pile of paper towels from the dispenser, he shrugged. “Out there? Just having some fun. Same as Kyle and Cole would if things were reversed.”

  That wasn’t what Adam had meant, but he let it go for the real question bugging him. “What are you smiling about? Unless you failed to grasp the situation, things are not good, Killian.”

  “No,” he snorted, wiping down his arms, “they’re better than. Did you hear what Rachel said? She dismissed me, and that, my friend, is a punishable offense. Just think of the possibilities.”

  Maybe he really had flipped his lid because Adam shouldn’t have to explain the obvious. “You can’t punish her, Killian. She’s not ours to punish.”

  “Please.” Showing the first signs of annoyance, Killian chunked the used towels into the waste basket with undo force. “Today’s events are just a temporary setback.”

  “Not according to the three truckloads of stuff I had to haul back to our place.”

  That should have broken Killian’s smile, not widened it. “Oh, another punishable offense. They’re just stacking up now.”

  “Damnit!” Adam wheeled around as Killian shoved past him. “Why don’t you get it? There aren’t going to be anymore punishments or anything else. Rachel dumped us, kicked us to the curb, threw our stuff out on her drive, and then publicly dismissed us. It. Is. Over.”

  “No.” Killian’s smile did straighten out into as serious an expression as Adam had ever seen him wear. “It’s you who aren’t getting it. You never have, and maybe that’s your mom’s fault. See, you loved her, and she didn’t love you back.”

  Adam flinched from the truth in Killian’s words, but that didn’t stop his friend from saying his piece. “Now you want to say fuck Rachel, I don’t love her anymore, but it doesn’t work that way. You love who you love, and no, it ain’t easy, but that’s the point of unconditional love.

  “It makes you feel safe and secure because you know no matter what you do, you are loved.” Killian paused for a bare second before offering up a little shrug. “The only way to get there is to give it.”

  Adam didn’t have anything to say. He’d never been loved like that, but he wanted to be. How Killian could think a woman who had walked away from them could ever return that depth of emotion eluded Adam. More than anything, he wished he could be that blind, but all he could do was let his friend walk away without bursting his bubble.

  Killian hesitated at the door. “No matter what, you know there’s always a place for you by my side.”

  He didn’t even bother to turn and see if Adam had a response for that but left him alone to consider everything Killian had said. One thing his partner had right, he couldn’t stop loving Rachel just because he wanted to. The damn woman had worked her way into more than his heart. She managed to work her way into his very life.

  Now, knowing she wouldn’t be there tomorrow or the day after made his future feel bleak and pointless. He knew the feeling well enough from his childhood. It had passed, sort of. Killian had it right when he said Adam had never stopped loving his mom.

  He’d certainly never stopped wishing at the most absurd moments that he could actually have a conversation with her, one where she acted like a mom. No matter how much Mums acted like a mother to him, that didn’t stop him from wishing his mom would care. That’s what it would be like from now on with Rachel.

  There would never be another like her. No matter how many years passed or how many women filled them up, Adam knew that he’d never feel that moment of perfect peace again. But was that really worse than spending every day with a woman who didn’t love him?

  In Adam’s book it was yes because he couldn’t take that slow, painful torture. It wouldn’t work. Eventually, his love would sour into bitterness. It would be better to be left yearning than to be hardened by rejection. At least with the first option, Rachel could have a chance to find somebody she could love.

  Lifting off the bench he’d settled onto, Adam left that sickening thought behind him. Instead of focusing on what he couldn’t stomach, he returned to work, letting the monotonous task of pushing paperwork consume his every thought. The mindless routine helped to buffer him from the voice trying to nag at him.

  He couldn’t let another man touch her. Adam would kill the son of a bitch who tried. Just what the hell he was supposed to do about that raging insanity, he didn’t know. It all went to show that he was the one really being driven crazy.

  The distraction of work helped him ignore that concern up until the phone rang. Brandon already had a call at the front desk, and the others had gone back into the booking room to hassle Killian, Cole, and Kyle. That left him to pick up line two, which Adam did without hesitation.

  “Pittsview Sheriff’s Department, Deputy Whendon.” Adam paused, but nobody answered back. “Hello?”

  Only the hollow echo of an open line echoed back. About ready to hang up, every single fiber of his being froze with a sudden, soul-deep chill as a voice whispered across the phone.

  “Adam?”

  Rachel. He couldn’t breathe, couldn’t think beyond the hope that maybe she’d called to apologize, to tell him she’d taken a heavy dose of drugs that afternoon and lost her mind or maybe aliens had—

  “I just wanted…I’m at Hailey’s, and I didn’t know…What happened to Cole and Kyle?”

  Rachel stumbled through her question, sounding nervous and hesitant. Each soft, breathless pause was like a lash from a flaming whip across his skin as every time he felt a slight lift of optimism that she might say something else. Of course she didn’t because it was over.

  “They’ve been arrested. Killian’s booking them right now.”

  “Oh. Do you need us to come in and give a statement?”

  “I guess that’s up to the sheriff.”

  “Oh.”

  There came that pause, that awkward silence that he didn’t know how to fill. Adam fought the urge to demand answers, to demand explanations, to argue with her conclusions, but what would be the point? Rachel had made herself clear.

  “Well, you’ll tell him we’re here if he needs us?”

  “That would be my job.”

  “Yeah.” The word sighed across the line with such sorrow that Adam didn’t understand, not until she spoke again. “I really am sorry about…everything. I didn’t mean to hurt you. I just—”

  “Whatever.” The last thing Adam wanted to hear was all her pitying comments. He wasn’t pathetic, nor was he hurt. By all the strength in his body, he wouldn’t let himself be either of those things. “Hey, I’ve got work to do, so I’ll talk to you later, or I guess not.”

  Not waiting for her to get in another dig, Adam simply hung up the phone. He couldn’t deal with her right then. The very sound of her voice made his muscles twitch and itch with the need to do something, something violent to whoever stood too close. It took all his concentration and a few minutes for Adam to quell those urges until he had all his emotions locked down under tight control.

  “See you, buddy.”

  Adam blinked as Cole went sauntering by. Locking on to his image, Adam stared in numb confusion as Cole waved out a farewell to Brandon and disappeared through the front door. The sound of a drawer being pulled open had Adam realizing Killian had returned.

  “What was with that?” Adam asked, pointing to the door swinging closed behind Cole. “We just let people go now?”

  “Sheriff’s orders.” Killian shrugged, snatching
his keys out of the drawer and banging it closed with his thigh. “Didn’t Brandon tell you? Alex called and said he’d settled everything up with Heather. Cole’s going to pay for the damage, so we’re to let them go.”

  That made sense. That’s how Alex liked to run things. It saved them the paperwork, the taxpayers the money, and everybody the headache of dragging things out too long. In the end, the judge would have made Cole pay, so why go through all that effort?

  Still, Adam looked around before casting Killian another confused look. “Them?”

  “Cole’s a generous man.” Meaning he paid Killian to let him go first, probably to get a head start on his hunt for Hailey.

  “Idiot.” That had Killian hesitating long enough to shoot Adam a grin. “And he isn’t the only one. Where do you think you’re going?”

  “Back on patrol.”

  Adam didn’t believe that for a second. The last time Killian had patrolled, he’d conveniently run into Rachel, which proved that Cole wasn’t the only fool around. “You’re going to be the one Alex throws in jail if you don’t back off Rachel.”

  “I ain’t going to see Rachel,” Killian informed him with enough snootiness to have Adam doubting him.

  “Yeah, right. I’m not going to bail your ass out. You’ll have to call your mom.”

  That threat should have wiped out Killian’s smirk, but it only made the other deputy chuckle. “That’s just who I’m going to see because it is time to go nuclear on Rachel’s ass. We need help.”

  “There is no ‘we’ in this,” Adam corrected him.

  “Fine, then. Me, I. I need help, so I’ll catch up with you later.”

  Adam watched Killian saunter out of the station with much of the same cockiness Cole had. “Idiot.”

  Whatever Killian thought he’d accomplished by bringing Mums into this disaster, Adam didn’t know. All he knew was that he would save his pride and dignity and keep his ass seated. Rachel had made herself clear. He wouldn’t be chasing after her like some fool because he got what Killian couldn’t grasp.

  He thought just loving the girl would be enough, but it wouldn’t be. Adam had loved his mother, but that had never made her love him back. All his attempts had been nothing more than a waste of time and energy. Eventually, Killian would realize that’s all his attempts would be.

  Sitting there, trembling under the strain of staying seated, Adam listed every reason that he was right and Killian was wrong. All the reminders didn’t make it any easier to hold back and not go racing off after Killian. The only thing that held him back was Rachel herself and the cold look she’d given him when she’d demanded her key back.

  “Hey, Adam.” Brandon broke his concentration, bringing back to life the noise and commotion of the station house around him. “Line three.”

  God help him, he hoped it wasn’t Rachel again. He couldn’t handle another round of her poor-little-Adam tones. Glaring down at the phone, he brewed a hard shell of anger before he snatched up the receiver.

  “Deputy Whendon.”

  “Adam.”

  Not Rachel. “Nick Dickles.”

  “Hey, man,” Nick sang out like they were actually friends. The gloating cheer in his tone warned Adam of what would come next. “I just wanted to call and offer my condolences. I heard a tale of your dismissal and wanted to lend you my sympathies.”

  He could have not laughed when he said the word, but Adam wouldn’t have believed him no matter how sincere Nick sounded. “Is that all?”

  “All?” A chuckle rumbled over the line, smooth, easy, and full of victory. “No, son. This is only the beginning. We’ll call it all when Rachel’s wearing a smile twice as big as any you put on her face.”

  “Touch her and I’ll kill you.”

  “You’d rather I get a buddy to do it while I watch?”

  Without thought, the need to hit Nick manifested itself into action. Adam slammed the phone down before he realized what he’d done. No longer trembling, he sat there shaking outright at his desk. He couldn’t believe Rachel had listened to whatever crap that man had said.

  She should have come to them, asked them, but Killian had it right. Rachel didn’t trust them, didn’t respect them. There could be no future in a relationship like that, but he’d never let Nick have her. Nobody would touch what was his.

  “Shit!” Shoving away from his desk with that violent expletive, Adam snatched up his keys and went racing after Killian.

  * * * *

  Rachel stared at the phone, unable to shake the echo of Adam’s voice. His tone had been beyond cold, sounding completely flat and lifeless. Whatever. That’s about what his tone said with every word, but hearing him actually dismiss her had cut deep. He really didn’t care.

  A wheezing breath broke the silence in Hailey’s kitchen, a warning of the storming sobs building inside her. Her hand clamped down over her mouth, fighting to hold back the tide. She wouldn’t cry. Not now, not here, not ever. Not over men who didn’t love her.

  “Don’t ‘now Hailey’ me!”

  Hailey’s roar fortified Rachel’s control. It was easier to focus on the trashing her friend’s life had taken tonight than the one Rachel would have to wake up and face in the morning. There would be time for tears, but right now tea sounded better.

  Focusing on that small task, she kept an ear to the conversation floating back from the living room. Patton had started to calm Hailey down, which Rachel considered a minor miracle. She’d called Patton to give her the heads-up, only because there could be no two closer friends than Hailey and Patton.

  Still, Rachel had honestly expected Patton to show up and make a bigger disaster out of the night given her predilection toward chaos. Then again, maybe she had reason to be concerned. As she carried the tea tray down the hall, their softer words started to define themselves.

  “Well, this is going to be your game, Hailey, but you need help. The first thing I suggest is for you to figure out what Cole’s weakness is.”

  Patton might have wound down Hailey’s temper, but she’d done so to focus it on getting into mischief. That figured.

  “He doesn’t have any, Patton,” Hailey groaned. “Don’t you think I’ve already looked? The man doesn’t care about anything beyond cars and fucking.”

  “Cars? Kind of like that rusted thing Kyle lured you in with?”

  “Oh, great. Let’s play copycat,” Hailey snapped. “I’ll go find a car Cole can’t resist, and then what? What good does that do me?”

  That sounded like Rachel’s cue to interrupt and hopefully bring whatever insanity was brewing between the friends to an end.

  “Well, I just got off the phone with Adam,” Rachel declared over the tinkling clings of the cups on the tray. “I’m sure you’ll be pleased to hear that Killian arrested both Cole and Kyle and is in the process of dragging them down to the station.”

  That should have triggered a conversation shift, but only silence greeted her. Silence and Hailey’s trancelike stare as she watched Rachel lower the tray onto the coffee table. The only thing creepier than the way Hailey gazed at her was the way her words whispered out.

  “Cole would give his left nut for Bavis’s Fastback.”

  “What?” Rachel did not understand how that connected to anything, but when Hailey continued on, her voice growing stronger, she began to get a clue.

  “Rachel and Kitty Anne are running an investigative story on a whorehouse down in Dothan.”

  “Why am I nervous at hearing my named mentioned?” And why were they smiling at her like that? The slow spread of Patton’s grin wound the nervous tension in Rachel’s stomach because she knew that look well.

  “I think see a plan.”

  Chapter 32

  Wednesday, May 21st

  Two weeks later, Rachel still couldn’t get over her shock at what Hailey and Patton had called a plan. She’d have called it a disaster, a convoluted, destined-to-fail mess. That first night she’d been too wrapped up in her own misery to reason through a
ny argument that would have put the brakes on Hailey’s wild scheme.

  Not that logic really counted for much these days. Hailey seemed to have completely flipped her lid. Instead of calming down and considering the consequences to her crazy actions, she appeared to have thrown herself headfirst into an all-out affair with Kyle Harding and, Rachel suspected, Cole Jackson.

  Patton never had any sense. Neither did Kitty, which explained why she’d eagerly jumped at the chance to join Hailey’s game. All of them were gung-ho with Rachel trapped between them, a place she began to fear Killian had been right about.

  Juggling crazy ladies, soon-to-be irate Cattlemen, prostitutes, and their madams, not to mention the police and one really miserable old man, this story had gotten dangerous. Strangely enough, Rachel didn’t thrive on dangerous. It didn’t make her excited but left her feeling sick and on edge.

  All the tension and worry only added to the heavy weight of depression that crept into her life. That might be a mild description. Post-traumatic stress disorder probably came closer given she couldn’t even sleep in her own bed.

  Once upon a time, crisp, cool sheets had invited her to snuggle in and inhale the clean scent of her bed. Now all they looked was cold and sterile, lonely without the musky scent of men clinging to the cotton. It was all right. The couch felt comfortable enough, and with the pillows behind her, Rachel could almost delude herself into believing she wasn’t alone.

  Sleeping in the living room did have a disadvantage. Namely, she couldn’t ignore the knocking on the front door. Whoever dared to come calling that early was lucky because Rachel really hadn’t been asleep. She’d been faking.

  Not having any sleep didn’t make her any happier to be bothered. Irritation added to her rushed movements as she fumbled for her robe. It didn’t hit her until her fingers closed over the cool latch on the deadbolt that she really shouldn’t open the door. Killian and Adam could be lurking on the other side.

  Well, maybe just Killian. Adam had disappeared, a fact that she tried to avoid noticing but couldn’t stop from feeling every moment of every day. A part of her ached to catch just a glimpse of him, but then his cold dismissal would whisper through her head and warn her that seeing him might hurt more.