by Styles, T.
“You know I’m not gonna do that, baby. Just do what you must.” He said, as he continued to follow me. When my phone rang I anxiously answered it without looking at the number. I got a new cell phone and put the number on my voicemail at home for Miss Daffany to reach me in case she called.
“Hello. Miss Daffany, is this you?”
“No, Miss Wayne it’s Parade. Where are you?” “I’m out.” I sighed.
“Out where?” she persisted. “I’ve been trying to reach
you for weeks.” I had been deliberately ignoring her because lately all I could think about was Miss Daffany and that unborn baby she was carrying. And since Miss Parade didn’t want to talk about her, I left her alone. It had been a few months since we saw Miss Daffany at the police station and I was worried sick.
“I’ve been looking for Miss Daffany.”
She sighed.
“What’s wrong with you?” she screamed into the phone.
“The girl doesn’t want to be found can’t you understand that?! Why are you doing this to yourself? It’s ridiculous!” “I know, Miss Parade but I can’t help it. I have to try! She ain’t got nobody out here but me since you turned your back on her too.”
“Miss Wayne, that girl is gone! Nobody can help her now. Trust me, she’s not the same person we use to know.” “I don’t want to believe that.” I told her getting into the
passenger seat of Dayshawn’s black Acura. Dayshawn parked
and let me talk to her knowing when I was done, I’d be right back
out there looking for my friend. “All she needs is love. If you
were sick wouldn’t you want somebody to be there for you?” Silence.
“You care about her more than me!”
“What?” I asked not sure if I heard her correctly. “I said you care about her more than me!”
“That’s not fair!”
“Well that’s how it seems!” she cried. “I’m getting married and you not even here for me. You steady runnin’ around town tryin’ to find Daffany’s-fuckin’-fiend ass! What about me?
Huh?”
“Parade, please,” I shook my head and looked up. “That
girl is alone out here!”
“Oh so now I’m Parade!” she sobbed. “I ain’t got nobody
either! Remember that while you outside at night chasin’ zombies!”
When she ended the call I fell back in my car seat. I can’t
believe this chile is doing this to me right now. Mentally I can’t
deal! She know I love her more than anything but I love Miss
Daffany too. I think she’s taking her problems out on me because
although she’s getting married, she’s not happy. I was so pissed I
almost didn’t even feel like looking for Miss Daffany anymore. I
was done.
“Excuse me? Ya’ll lookin’ for Daffany the Dopehead?” a
little boy said approaching my car window.
I looked at Dayshawn and back at him. Did God answer
my prayers so soon? It hurt to hear the name he gave her but I
was relieved he knew who she was.
“Yes, honey?” I looked him over. He had to be about
twelve years old. “You know where she is?”
“Yeah…she be at the Smokehouse. It’s around da corner.
I can take you dere for some money.”
“Uh…sure, honey.” I reached into my purse. “Take it!
Just get in and show us the way.”
“You sure about this?” Dayshawn asked unlocking the
door for the kid to get in.
“What you think?” I responded.
He sighed and pulled off. After a few minutes of driving
we arrived at a large group of houses. They looked run down and
dilapidated.
“Dere the house right there?” He pointed to the worst looking one of all. It was green and most of the windows were
shattered. “Ya’ll can let me out here.”
“Hey, you don’t want to wait for us to take you home?” I
asked, realizing it was too late to have somebody’s child out on
the street looking for dope heads.
“I ain’t got no home.” He said, as he jumped out of the
car and ran down the street.
We watched him disappear into the night and felt pity.
Had I had more time, I would’ve grabbed his little ass and
demanded that he let us take him somewhere. But I had neither
the time nor the patience.
“Wait right here.” I told Dayshawn preparing to exit the
car.
“I don’t like this, baby.” He said grabbing my arm. “Can’t
we come back during daytime?”
“No! I might lose her if we wait.” I snatched away from
him.
“Please be careful. And if she don’t want to come, don’t
force her.” He yelled.
“I’m not leaving out of there without her.” I told him as I
unbuckled my seat belt and moved toward the run down house. When I got behind the old green house I saw a bordered
up door. It didn’t appear as if anybody could come in and out of
it so, I figured there had to be another way. When I looked down
I saw a dark hole with steps leading within it. That’s must be how
they got inside.
The smell hit me the moment I took the first step. But my
love for Miss Daffany pushed me forward. If Miss Parade was
gonna give up on her she’d have to live with it but I wasn’t. The
moment my foot hit the last step water splashed inside my tennis
shoes causing it to make a squishy noise when I walked. It was
disgusting and I hated being wet. I could only pray it was musty
old water and not piss. The moment I entered the house somebody reached for me begging for money. I kicked him off and gripped my arms hoping I’d live long enough to help Miss Daffany out if she was in there. I didn’t want any of my limbs hanging. People continued to reach for me like they were in hell
and needed an escape. Maybe they were.
When I turned a dark corner I saw a candle on the ground
and a dude giving another dude a blow job and even I was disgusted. Walking past them did nothing to stop their rhythm. As I
continued down the path I came to a bigger room. The smell was
so strong I was sure I smelled it before. It was the day we popped
up over my grandmother’s house to check on her and she was
dead. She had been that way for weeks. I was sure a corpse lied
amongst them and either they didn’t know or care.
“Do you know Daffany?” I asked a stranger who was
lying up against the wall nodding off. There appeared to be thirty or so people in the broken down house. The person ignored
me, appearing half dead.
I repeated the same question ten times before I finally
spotted her. She was lying on the bare floor her pregnant belly
straight up in the air. I gasped seeing her like that. How could she
come to this?
She was completely naked and appeared so thin that had
it not been for looking for someone pregnant, I would not have
known it was her. A man crawled on top of her gripping her legs
and pressing her belly without regard for her position. Seeing
this, I rushed past everyone to get at her kicking people in the
process. This dirty mothafucka had her legs spread a part while
he moaned inside of her.
“Get the fuck off of her!” I screamed grabbing him by his
neck throwing him to the floor. His monstrous dick was rock
hard.
“What the fuck?” he responded, too high to challenge me. “
I will kick your ass if you come near me!” I told him.
“Get up, Miss Daffany!” I grabbed her arm as delicate as possible but forceful enough to lead her out. I had plans to take off my sweatshirt and put it on her naked body the moment we got outside but first, I needed to get her out of that house before these
mothafuckas got up and decided to hurt me.
She moved very little and I decided to carry her when I
realized walking wasn’t working. The stank from her body was
atrocious. We were out in the backyard when I gently put her
down on the grass. Stooping down I was preparing to take off my
sweatshirt until she wrapped her limp arms around me. I held her
tightly happy that she recognized me. But instead of speaking,
she went tugging at my pants instead.
“What you want your dick sucked?” she said going for
my zipper. “I can suck it for you real good if you let me. I just
need to get hiiiiiiiigggh.”
“Miss Daffany, please!” I hit her hands. “It’s me! Miss
Wayne!”
She stopped reaching for me and wept. She appeared
conscious but I could tell she didn’t recognize me. And then she
smiled and I wondered what brief moments filled her mind to
remind her who I was. Was it the times we played on the playground in Elementary school? Or was it the time when me, Miss
Sky, Miss Parade and her ran away from home just to be together after a party.
“Ooooohhh, MissWayne,” she replied her eyes half
closed. “You like it kinky huh? I’ll call you whatever you like” Didn’t she know who I was? Did the drug have her mind
that gone? I could barely see her face because tears flooded my
eyes so I pushed her hands off.
“Miss Daffany, please! I’m family!”
I was somehow able to get my sweatshirt off and onto her
when I felt a blow against the back of my head. The pain was
blinding. I fell face first on the grass and received another blow
to the back of my head. It felt like rocks were in my mouth due
to my tooth being cracked. Finally able to turn around, I placed
my arms out in front of me to stop any more blows. One by one they hit me with a bat, back to back. All I could see was their feet. One of them had on some old white Air Force Ones and the other
had on some run over yellow Timberland boots.
“Help!!!! Please!” I screamed hoping Dayshawn would
hear me. “What did I do to you?!”
They didn’t answer. Just kept hitting and kicking me. I looked up and saw Daffany scoot back away from me
on the grass. She looked nervous and scared. And although her
breasts were covered with my shirt, her vagina was exposed.
There was so much blood on my face that it was useless trying to
identify the suspects now. The more they hit me, the more I didn’t feel the blows. I knew I’d be dead if they continued. “Get the, bitch!” one of them yelled. “And hurry up
before she gets away!”
I guess Miss Daffany was about to run when they directed their attention to her. I was thinking about my next move until
I heard…click. It sounded like a gun and I knew I would die. My
mother would not be able to take me being murdered. What about
Miss Parade? She couldn’t survive without me either. Why hadn’t I listened to them? I was so stupid.
And then I heard, “Unless you want a bigger whole in the
tip of your dick then the one God blessed you with, I suggest you
put her down and get the fuck out of here.”
It was Dayshawn!
“We ain’t got no business with you!” a man’s voice said.
“We just want the girl. She makes us a lot of money.” “Did you hear me? Cause the next thing I say will hurt I
promise you.”
“Fuck her!” the other man said. “She ain’t worth it! We
can get another whore way better than her someplace else. And
one who looks better.”
I heard them run and then I heard Dayshawn’s footsteps
rush over toward me.
“Look at you!” he said touching my face. “Oh my gawd!
Are you okay, honey?” he said lifting my head sniffling. “Yes! Is Miss Daffany okay?”
“She’s right here. Let me get you to the car and I’ll come
back for her.”
“No…please, take her first!” I told him. My head hurt so
bad it was terrible.
“Miss Wayne, I’m not leaving you!”
“And I’m not leaving without her! Now take her first.
Please, Dayshawn,” I pleaded with him. “Cause if I leave her,
and she gets away, all of this will be for nothing.”
Silence.
“Bitch, you gonna cause my ulcer to flare up!’ he said to
me as I heard him stand up. “I’ll be right back.”
I heard him grunt like he was lifting her up and I was
relieved. Everything in me just wanted Miss Daffany to be okay.
And it all most cost me my life.
Parade
It was a beautiful day for a concert. And as I sat outside of Miss Wayne’s apartment complex waiting on him to come out, I admired the peacefulness while I could. That would all change the moment Miss Wayne stepped foot in this car and found out who I had with me. He’s gonna kill me! But trust me, it was beyond my control. I brought Sweets to prevent an argument with Smokes and now I was gonna start one with Miss Wayne, instead. I was starting to wonder if it would be worth it.
“Where you at?” I called his house phone. I’d been sitting outside of the apartment he shared with his lover for over twenty minutes. And we had forty minutes to make it to the concert and it wasn’t lookin’ good! He told me he was coming downstairs a long time ago! “We gonna be late for the concert! Shit! I want to see the opening act too.”
“Calm down, Miss Parade! I tell you, I’ll be glad when this wedding thing is over because you’ve been a royal bitch lately.”
“That’s your opinion,” I told him frowning at his comment. “But I spent $90.00 for these tickets each and I’m picking you up. The least you could do is be on time. You told me you liked Corrine Bailey.”
“And I do!” he said sounding out of breath. “I can’t tell cause it seems like I spent this money for nothin’.”
“And I never done nothin’ for you? Hold on, Miss Parade.” He said cutting me off. “Miss Daffany, can you take the potato salad out of the fridge and put it in the picnic bag by the door please? Thank you, baby.”
I hated that she still lived with him. He was hardly available for me. Back in the day if I called him he was always there. Now I could be dead for all he knew and he could probably care less. And I was sure he was still having problems with Daffany using dope, even though he’d never admit it to me. There’s no way a dope head can all of a sudden stop based on sheer determination alone. I for one wasn’t buying it.
“And while you’re running your mouth, you could be up here helping me with these bags.”
“Bags?” I had purchased our seats on the lawn of the outdoor venue and you were allowed to bring outside food. But why was he bringing bags? To me one was enough.
“Yes bags! Now hurry up here before we’re really late.”
“I’m not tryin’ to be bothered with that zombie?” I adjusted the rearview mirror so that it faced me. “Where is the dope head anyway? I’m not trying to see her.”
“Where you think she at? Didn’t you just hear me talk to her?”
“Yeah whatever,” I sighed. “And what about your man? He can’t help you bring the bags downstairs?”
“He’s out of town and don’t flatter yourself about Miss Daffany! This chile ain
’t hardly thinkin’ about you.”
“Shoot!” I yelled, turning the mirror back in its correct position so that it focused on the road behind me. Let me hurry up so I can get this over with cause going back and forth with him is a losing battle. “I’m on my way up!”
Miss Wayne’s place was always so cozy. Dark burgundy was dominant for his color scheme. It blended well with the green curtains he chose and the dark blue sofa. He knew how to make you feel at home when you stepped through his door. Everything was neat and the house smelled of the banana bread candles he purchased from Bed Bath and Beyond.
He opened up the door without saying anything when I knocked and continued about his apartment like I wasn’t even there. I saw three picnic bags already by the door and wondered how many people he thought he was feeding tonight. This was enough food to feed a small village.
“All this goin’ with us?” My statement caused him to break his busy body motion for one moment. I picked up one bag and noticed it was heavy.
“Yeah.” He placed saran wrap over a bowl of fried chicken. “I got one more bag and then we good to go.”
I loved this man all my life. And don’t get it twisted, I appreciate everything he does for me, but he’s getting on my last fuckin’ nerves! He was the reason I could hardly lose weight. He cooks for every occasion. Somebody’s birthday…he’s cooking. A holiday…he’s cooking. Somebody’s taking a shit…he’s cooking. It’s ridiculous!
“Hey, Parade.” Daffany spoke appearing from the back room. Her stomach was extra large and she was real skinny. She looked bad. Real bad. I felt my nose stinging. It was the sensation I got whenever I was on the verge of crying. How could she let herself fall like this and force me and Miss Wayne to watch her? I hated her for the pain she was causing me. And I hated her for the pain she was causing us.
“Daffany.” I said dryly not in the mood for a conversation with that bitch. My eyes roamed everywhere but on her. “Well I’m bout to take this stuff outside, Miss Wayne.” I grabbed two of the picnic bags and threw them over one arm and held the third in my hand. “I’ll be waitin’ for you in the car.”
“Hold up I’m comin’ now!” he said grabbing his oversized Marilyn Monroe meets Car Windshield shades. “Honey, you gonna be okay?” he asked Daffany swinging his white leather purse over his shoulder. He had on blue velour pants, and a matching blue velour top with blue strap sandals. His toes were damn near hanging over the edge.