John Keats 02 Paper Moon

by Dennis Liggio

  Maybe knife wasn't the best term for what she held. A blade like that deserved to be called a dagger. A long blade with a slight curve, it had an ornate handle. There was no moon tonight, as incoming rain clouds covered the sky, but in the outdoor lights the blade flashed silver with reflections due to the twists and thrusts as she tried to gut me.

  She wore something completely white, somewhere between a dress and a toga, almost a simple shift. It was belted at the waist with a similar fabric as her blindfold. Though I wondered it for a moment, I was pretty sure this was not the new hipster fashion. This was I Started a New Religion in My Garage fashion. All things considered I was pretty sure she was not a mugger. My wallet might be safe, but my life - not so much.

  "What the hell, lady?" I managed to say just before she charged at me again, dagger flashing.

  Since she had lost the element of surprise and I wasn't trying to reciprocate violence, I was better able to evade her attacks. I didn't need to get close to her, I just needed room to move away from her. Since I had the whole parking lot, I had plenty of space. However, she was surprisingly fast. Even with all that room and all my backing off, she still kept nearly slicing my chest.

  Unless her knife attacks counted, she never responded to my words. I started to say, "I have no quarrel with y-" but she kept slashing at me, and my breath was better spent on movements. Clearly she had some sort of quarrel with me that I was unaware of. So I resorted to a simple "Get the fuck off me!" shout which did not stop her either.

  My Get The Hell Out of the Way While Asking Her To Stop strategy was going well with enough until I ran out of parking lot. I stepped backward and panicked. I had just bumped up against my car, the only car in the lot. This was an unfortunate coincidence; I hadn't been intending to maneuver this direction, and I sure as hell wasn't expecting to bump up against it with a dagger flying at me. I wondered if she had intentionally been herding me toward it, but had no time to think about that as her dagger thrust forward, aiming once again for my chest. Panicking I clumsily slid left along the car. Once again, my shirt took the hit. The dagger passed through the tattered mess of my shirt and past me. Then the knife point screeched along my car and with dismay I realized that there was probably a long scratch.

  Seeing her fuck up my car steeled my will. It was less about the damage to my car as much as that she put an identifying mark on it. I drive a fairly common, forgettable car (a silver Honda Civic) for a reason! I wanted to always be anonymous! Now I had the Honda with the long scratch. I was angry.

  At this point I realized that I wasn't going to get away from this fight. The Rocky Balboa technique of tiring her out seemed far too unlikely and had too much potential for stabbing, as she might tire me out first; I had some years on her. I could run for it. But I wasn't sure that would be a good strategy, since I knew already that she was fast, perhaps faster than me. And my car was right here, so I would eventually need to get back here. You can't do much in Austin without a car. And when I came back, she'd probably be waiting. I could get help, but telling a friendly police officer he needed to escort me back to my car because it was being guarded by a dagger-wielding blind chick was probably not going to go over well.

  Of course, fighting back unarmed against a crazy knife wielding woman isn't as easy as just deciding to do it. At least it wouldn't be completely one-sided. She might be faster than me, but I was pretty sure I was stronger than her. I technically had a longer reach, but with the dagger, it was about even. The way I saw it, I had a few options. I could block with my forearm, taking a gash on the bone, then hope that would be enough time to grab her wrist and that she didn't completely fuck up my arm. I wasn't sure about that one; I didn't want to go to the emergency room if I could help it, so I put that idea on the back burner. Next idea: I could do some fancy grappling shit where I grabbed her forearm and yanked it around. While I had seen that in self defense videos, it's usually done without a large curved knife and often on attackers that aren't professional dagger wielders. I'd go out on a limb and suspect that she was trained in the finer points gutting people, so I was just really damn lucky she hadn't drawn blood yet.

  That left my last option. Use the environment and do something unexpected. That sounds like a fantastic idea, but actually figuring out what the unexpected is happens to be something else entirely. As much as I hated the idea, the only asset I had right now was my car. And as much as I might complain, I'd rather the car get damaged than me.

  I shifted around my car, sliding to my left and then doing a fancy spin so that she was on the side of the car but I was behind the trunk. I moved farther back so that the corner of the trunk was between us. She would need to either walk around the side or stab across the trunk. If she moved around the car, I could keep backing around, keeping the car between us. I can keep this car between us all night, baby. While that would keep me safe, although in a tedious way, for my plan, I was really hoping she'd try to thrust her arm over the trunk.

  She took my bait. It wasn't exactly what I expected, but it was still usable. Rather than stabbing forward, she swung out her arm at me over the top of the trunk, trying to hit my shoulder. I only leaned out of the way as much as I needed to, because my move was to slam my hand down over her arm. This succeeded and her hand hit the trunk hard, but unfortunately, she kept hold of the dagger. I had hoped that the impact would cause her to let go. I could tell by her face that it did hurt. I then slammed my other hand down over her wrist, keeping her from twisting that curved blade to cut me.

  I kept holding her hand down, gritting my teeth. She was fairly strong despite her size, but I still had the advantage in strength and weight. I couldn't see her obscured eyes, but I was pretty sure she glared at me, and I could see that her teeth were bared. She tried leaning backward, attempting to leverage her weight against me to free her arm, but I held her arm down with two hands, my weight pressing down against the car.

  "Now what the hell is this all about?" I said slowly through gritted teeth.

  She didn't answer. Instead she used her other hand to punch one of my arms, right on the inside of the elbow joint, trying to get me to release my hold. This hurt like hell, since I couldn't dodge it. It did get me to ease up, but it was also her mistake. One arm was already forward and pinned against the car, so punching with the other moved her balance forward so that she was leaning over the trunk. I rocked backward, yanking her knife arm forward with both of my hands. She had already been off balance from leaning forward, so I yanked her smaller frame across the trunk of the car, leaving her legs dangling over one side and her arms dangling over the other. Then I twisted her arm. She yelped in pain and finally let go of the dagger, which clattered to the ground.

  Leaving her sprawled over the trunk, I reached down and grabbed the dagger. I turned back toward her holding it defensively. Fast as she was, she had already recovered and gotten to a standing position. However, she wasn't trying to attack. Instead she rubbed the arm I had twisted. I think she might have run if I wasn't holding the dagger semi-threateningly. I wasn't planning on using it, I just didn't want her going full psycho.

  "Now are you going to tell me what this is about?" I said, trying to remain level headed, which even I admitted was surprising for someone she had just tried to murder. In my opinion, now that I was in control the situation, I shouldn't also freak out. Besides, I still I wanted to know the reason for that attack. If someone I didn't know was trying to murder me, this was probably bigger than the two of us.

  I couldn't really tell because of that white strip of cloth over her eyes, but it seemed like from her facial expression that what she felt was hatred. Her words confirmed that. "You must die. It has been dictated. To stop what has been foretold."

  Oh great. One of those. I had never been quite on the receiving end of religious crazy, but I figured it was just a matter of time. I had seen people like that online and sometimes yelling on the streets of Austin, but this was my first time being the target of someone like this. F
irst time and first time with a knife.

  "You don't even know me," I said. "Why are you trying to kill me?"

  "You are John Keats," she said. She spit the word like venom, my name itself hated syllables. "We don't doubt your identity. You must die."

  Well, she had the right person. She knew my real name. That also meant that either someone found me out or this wasn't related to Nick's disappearance.

  "Why?" I said. "Why are you trying to kill me? Why has that been decided?"

  "You know why," she snarled.

  I sighed and looked at the dagger, turning it over in my hand. It was ornate, a red jewel in the handle, some gold edges to the metal. There was some writing on the blade, but I wasn't sure what language. Hebrew? Arabic? Viking runes? I did notice two words in English, etched on either side of the blade, so faint that I could only read them as the light caught on the blade. LOVE on one side, TRUTH on the other. It was a little weird to see "love" on a murder device.

  "I'll ask again," I said, still looking over the dagger. "Who are you and why are you trying to kill me?"

  "You will herald the world's end!" she spat at me. "You will open the door!"

  "I have no idea what you're talking about," I said calmly. Seriously, who was I in the grand scheme of things? And what door? I didn't think she meant the entrance to the studio.

  "What you know doesn't matter," she said. "We Seers have foreseen the future. If you die now, it can be averted. We will protect the world and the future! The possibility for a respite from the world's future pain is here and now!"

  "Me? What does killing me do?"

  "It will stop the doom that comes," she said. "There are many possibilities and your actions a blur, but in all of them you appear before the end of humanity."

  "So you want to kill an innocent man because sometime in the future he might be a threat? And just based on your supposed future-telling? Which you even admitted has some uncertainties? That's insane."

  "You haven't been innocent for a while," she said. "The taint is upon you. We cannot see you anymore, but we know it is there."

  I tried not to laugh at the unintended slang meaning of the word "taint" and focused on what she was trying to say. "What are you talking about? I haven't done anything."

  "You've still been marked," she countered.

  "Marked? By who? Nobody's marked me."

  "Then you're a fool," she said acidly. "Yesterday the world turned into conjunction, the first in two years. The gears started, doom is in motion. A dark future has just begun. We know you are involved... we just don't know how," she said, losing confidence for a moment before redoubling in her fanaticism. "But you are! If you die now, it will be averted! The futures narrow with your demise!"

  "Wait, back up," I said. "Did you say you don't know how I'm involved?"

  "Some details are unseen," she said, but she was uncomfortable about admitting that.

  "But you're..." I searched for the word she had used. "Seers, right? Like, people that see the future, am I right? That is what you're talking about."

  "Yes," she said neutrally.

  "Then why can't you see the details? Why don't you know how I'm involved? Particularly if you're trying to kill me."

  "I don't have to explain myself to you," she said sullenly.

  "You'd deny a condemned man the reason for his death?"

  "I would deny you everything," she said with cold anger.

  I pointed the knife point at her, not entirely threatening, but enough to make a point. "Why can't you see my future?" My voice I allowed to be forceful.

  "We are blind to your actions," she said reluctantly. "We can see up to you entering the mental hospital, then sometime in there we cannot see again. We can only see around you - your wake, the lives you affect, the chaos that surrounds you, and you standing at the moment before the end of all things."

  Bellingham hospital again. I would never be free of that place. That was really what tainted me. That was the memory I'd never be free of.

  I shook my head. "Your own logic is damning. You don't even know I will cause these things, just that I'm involved. Even if I thought you weren't crazy - and I think you are - you still have no reason to kill me! You have only a faint notion, a coincidence!"

  "What is one wrong death if it prevents the end of billions?" she said.

  "Spoken like a true fanatic," I said with a sigh. "I've never had any patience for the righteous. What if you're wrong? How many need to die before you learn that?"

  "We know the end is coming! My sisters and I have foreseen it! The true enemy is unknown, but we know it is one of them - the Harvest God, The One Who Waits Beyond, the Demon Kings, the -"

  "You don't even know who destroys the world? What do you know?" I said incredulously.

  "We know that you are involved! We have seen you in the future in a field of black! We have heard the whispering in the present. In the darkest voids we have heard it calling your name across space, across the thresholds! You are Keats! And you will bring the end of us all!"

  "You want to do something? Then go prevent your damn apocalypse some other way! Stop the other symptoms of our demise! Do whatever else you want, but get the fuck out of my life!"

  "Other agents are on other assignments, but you are mine. She is a foothold, but you are the door. We will not suffer you to live!" She tensed up, her hands clenching. For a moment I worried that she had another dagger hidden on her that she was going to pull, but instead this was just her rage.

  "Wait, she who?" I said. Who else was she talking about? Who else was in danger?

  "I have said too much," she said. "If you will not listen to reason and let me kill you, talking is pointless."

  "Sacrificing my life isn't reason!" I said. "You know more, tell me! Tell me about the 'she' you mentioned!" I involuntarily brandished the dagger at her.

  The Seer took a step backward and kept her eyes on me. "Killing me won't stop us. I will be replaced. We will do what we need to protect this world. And for that, you will die"

  I looked down at my more threatening hold of the knife and relaxed it. "I'm not going to kill you."

  "It doesn't matter," she said, taking a few more steps back. "Know that we will return. We will do what is needed."

  "You stay the hell away from me," I said. "If you come near me or any of my friends, you're going to have hell to pay. I don't want to see you nor any of your crazy cult members ever again. I'm not evil nor am I going to bring about the end of the world. But I won't hesitate to hurt you if you're trying to kill me or hurt my friends. Got it?"

  "You won't stop it yourself," she said. "You need to die! Things are going to get worse and you'll realize it's all your fault!"

  "Your much worse can go fuck itself. I'm not your enemy. You can go fight whatever evil you want. Just leave me out of your crusade."

  I opened my car door, keeping my eyes on her. At first, she made no move to stop me.

  "Wait, return what you have taken!" she shouted. "The sacred blade!"

  I looked down at the dagger. What was she thinking? I wasn't going to hand back the knife to the person who just stabbed me with it. I examined the blade again and shrugged.

  "Y'know, I think I'll keep it."

  "Thief!" she cried, and she stepped toward me, but I gestured toward her with the dagger and she stepped back.

  "I don't think you can be trusted with this," I said.

  "Thief!" she shouted again.

  "I really don't care," I said as I got into my car. "You already want me dead. What are you going to do, kill me twice?"

  I pulled the door closed, and then locked all the other doors. I considered putting the dagger in a drink holder, but settled for putting it in the passenger seat next to me. I started the engine.

  The girl came close to the driver's side window, but was still a few feet away. She shouted loud enough that I could hear her. "You're just delaying the inevitable!"

  I shook my head and ignored her, putting the car i
nto gear and driving off.

  She shouted again. "You can't stop it! Darkness will have you!"

  Seven

  How do you go on after being attacked? After attempted murder? After crazy rantings that you yourself are somehow the end of all things? It's meeting with a chaotic storm that most of us never have to deal with. Nobody encounters apocalypse fanaticism lightly, nobody deals with diehard doomsayers and keeps their cool - you always come off feeling raw, your pulse even raising if you laughably dismiss them. The end of the world is a dire possibility that we find extremely unlikely, but we use that as an excuse - we really don't want to think about it, even if it were plausible. It's a field of dark thoughts we'd rather leave alone. We hate it when someone thrusts it into our face, like a dog's nose in a mess he made. And if someone adds attempted murder to that, you may have some trouble calming down.

  Had this happened on one of my off days, I might have headed home to nurse a bottle of liquor, calming my nerves and numbing my consciousness to hopefully fall face forward into a dreamless sleep. Instead, I only had the bandwidth to get in the car, drive to a safe location (a parking lot two miles away), and let out the breath I was holding. A few minutes of solid breathing had me feeling better. Then I got drive thru fast food - a greasy cheeseburger, even greasier fries, and a soft drink with enough sugar to rot my teeth. It probably took hours off my life expectancy, but it calmed my nerves. Never underestimate the healing power of a burger. Then I turned to more practical matters, pulling out my phone. I was still working. I had leads to follow. And I had been given a big one.

  Lindsey Hubert, the former executive producer for Hornswaggle & Friends who had defected to Boulder for another project, owned a condo in Austin. A public records search from my phone said her name was still on the deed, despite moving out of state. The condo was in a particularly sought after spot Downtown right on Town Lake, which had been renamed to Lady Bird Lake, a change I had never gotten used to, no matter how many years since it had happened. The condo hadn't been put up for sale yet. I guessed that Lindsey had reservations about her move, so if Boulder didn't work out, she could come back and live in her condo. She could have sold the condo and made some good money, but the area was so hot, if she had sold, even in a year she'd be paying a lot more for a similarly located condo.