Worth Saving

by G. L. Snodgrass

  I nodded to the boys, letting them know they were off duty and could go have fun. They carefully un-cocked their bows and dropped them at the blanket before running and diving into the cool water. All three came up sputtering at the cold shock.

  Sitting on the blanket, leaning back on my arms, I watched everyone splashing and yelling in the water. I’d determined that I’d stand guard while everyone else enjoyed themselves. Hearing a rustle slightly to the side and behind me I turned to see Susan stepping out her shorts, she’d already removed her T-shirt. My heart stopped, she stood there in a red bikini that somehow accentuated every curve. My eyes were trapped by the swaying hips as she slowly walked down to the river’s edge. Every step screamed, female and sex. Her perfect form and movement spoke to the animal deep inside of me, calling to my baser instinct and making me glad I was a man. I was also thankful that I was sitting down. Slowly my breath returned but I couldn’t look away. I noticed that Hector and the boys were in the same spot, all four of us were trapped by the vision.

  “Kris, can you help me a second,” Claire said from my side. She sounded like she was trying to not sound angry as she spoke through gritted teeth.

  I turned to see what she wanted, having to force my eyes away from Susan. And there before me was another goddess, lying on her stomach in a small black bikini, as skimpy as Susan’s. I couldn’t believe what I was seeing. I knew Claire had a beautiful body, but here, in all its glory was perfection. She reminded me of those women in the magazines I found at Mr. Johnsons. My heart raced and my insides dropped like I was in free fall. My eyes roamed from her bare feet, over those long graceful legs, resting on the perfectly rounded bottom. Up the pale flawless back with the golden hair flowing down her shoulders. My heart ached with wonder and admiration.

  She was looking at me, watching me as I examined her. She blushed, but couldn’t stop herself from flashing a small smile of satisfactions. Reaching out, she handed me some sunscreen and asked me to “do her back.” She laid her head on her arms and pulled her hair out of the way, assuming I would comply with her demands.

  The Norse god of Thor couldn’t have stopped me from spreading sunscreen on her gorgeous back. I warmed the oil in my hands before rubbing it into her shoulders. Her skin was so soft and warm, the sweet scent of coconut and Claire drawing me in. I lost all awareness of everything but the beautiful girl lying next to me. I slowly moved my hands to her waist, massaging the sunscreen into her flesh. My hands caressed her lower back and accidentally brushed the top of her suit bottoms, she didn’t object, just squiggled deeper into the blanket and moaned a little.

  I had trouble pretending like it wasn’t having any effect on me.

  “Do you want me to do your legs too?” I asked between breaths. Trying hard to show that it didn’t have any effect on me. You know, trying to play it cool. But god it was hard.

  “Mm, yes, thanks, that’d be nice,” She said.

  I pumped out a bunch more sunscreen and started at her ankles, slowly working my way up her legs. Squeezing her calves and being thrilled when she relaxed a little, soft sighing sounds escaping from her buried head. My hands moved above her knees but froze as my eyes locked onto that perfectly round bottom. My heart hurt looking at it. I couldn’t think as I memorized every detail.

  Glancing up I saw her staring at me over her shoulder, wondering why I’d stopped. Our eyes locked and I realized that the truth of what I was thinking was written all over my face. Her eyes left mine and traveled down my body to look at to my shorts and opened wide in shock when she saw the state I was in.

  I broke away and rolled onto my stomach, “OK, you should be good now,” I said, through gritted teeth, my voice threatening to betray me.

  “Thank you,” she said. And I swear there was a small smile in that statement.

  I lay there for several minutes trying to gain control over myself. Every time I got a whiff of coconut or heard her move, or just thought about what she looked like, I was lost again. I’d have to start the fight all over again.

  After about fifteen tense minutes, I heard her get to her feet. She stood there, the sun behind her, outlining her narrow waist and delicious curving hips. She reached out a hand towards me. “I think I’ll go swimming, want to come?” she asked. And looked disappointed when I said no.

  Shrugging her shoulders she turned and walked down to the water, I couldn’t help but watch. My world had exploded, and I was going to join it any moment. Visions of Claire and me wouldn’t stop dancing through my mind. I couldn’t control my thoughts.

  I wanted her so bad and wondered if this feeling would ever go away, praying that it would and dreading that it might.

  I looked at the group; the boys had shinnied up and tied a rope to the lamp post and were using it to swing out over the water and drop in. Jenny and Ellen were walking along the shore line looking for treasures. Margaret was waiting in line for her turn on the rope and Susan was sitting on the pier, her feet dangling in the water. She looked at Claire and back at me and flashed a knowing smile. Could she tell just by looking at me?

  Coming to the river must have been the dumbest idea I ever had.

  Gaining enough control, I stood and ran into the water, diving and swimming underneath until I felt the slow tug of the current. I surface out past everyone and dog paddled in place letting the cold water help me.

  I watched Hector swing out and yell as he dropped in a big splash and came up spitting a long stream of water like a fountain. I caught his attention and nodded back to the blanket; he immediately swam in and walked to the blanket drying off as he scanned the surrounding area.

  We spent the day at the river, the sun had lost its heat and was turning afternoon gold when I said it was time to go. There were a few grumbles, but everyone knew we didn’t want to be caught in the park at night.

  I promised that we’d come again and they started gathering their stuff. I noticed that Claire was avoiding me. She’d look at me some times, shake her head and then return to what she was doing.

  We walked back in the late afternoon, the same deployment as before, everyone tired but happy. We’d gone about half way when Claire dropped back to walk beside me.

  “It was a good day, thanks,” she said.

  I nodded, but couldn’t think of anything to say. For the first time I realized how much the five years alone had cost me. I couldn’t even talk to a pretty girl without stumbling over my words.

  “Do you ever wonder what our lives would have been like without the Illness,” she asked, almost reading my mind. “We’d be graduating from high school, maybe getting ready for prom or something. Worried about college next year. It seems so far from reality, the before world I mean, like a fairy tale,” she said, smiling up at me.

  I looked at her as she walked easily alongside me. What was it about this girl, no this woman, that she could twist my guts with a simple smile.

  “Come on, let’s beat everyone to the library, I want to claim the bath before the rest of you girls get there, they’ll hog it half the night,” I said and started running for home.

  Claire seemed surprised but quickly joined me and we were off racing for the library, she beat me by a step, I tried everything only she was too fast. Maybe when my leg wound was fully healed. I doubted it though.

  She grabbed the front door handle and pulled it open, laughing, a look of triumphant glee spread from ear to ear. “I win, you’re getting slow in your old age,” she said, her eyes dancing.

  I stopped next to her and put my hands on my knees to catch my breath. “Yeah, you reached the front door first,” I said through huffed breaths. “But the objective was the bath,” I said before scooting through the door and up the stairs ahead of her. She screamed that I was cheating and followed closely behind. I blocked her every time she tried to pass, we both tumbled into the bathroom, laughing at each other.

  She hit me in the shoulder and then froze as our eyes found each other.

  I didn’t think, didn’t
worry. I leaned down and kissed her, if I’d thought about it I might have hesitated and missed the sweetest experience of my life.

  Her lips tasted like honey covered coconut as she kissed me back, sending my heart skipping to a new rhythm. Her arms wrapped around my neck as my arms wound around her waist, my hands resting on the small of her back as I pulled her close. Her body melted into me, feeling soft and warm and full of dreams.

  We fit together perfectly, as if we were made by a master machinist, two parts of the same pair. We were lost in our own little world; nothing existed except for each other and that kiss. Her lips caressed mine, seeking more.

  I wonder where it would have gone, but we were interrupted with laughing voices coming up the stairs. We quickly seperated, a part of me had been torn away. I grieved the loss and blinked hard to regain a sense of where I was at and what was going on around me.

  Claire’s eyes were closed, looking like she was lost in a dream. Slowly she opened them and looked at me hesitantly, searching my face. She smiled at me and something melted inside me.

  We’d barely separated when Ellen and Jenny burst into the room clamoring to know who had won.

  “Oh, I won, most definitely,” Claire said. “Kris came in first, but I won,” she said with secret smile.

  Chapter Twelve

  I was helping the boys put the finishing touches on a chicken coop we’d built on their apartment roof. Tying off some chain link fence to keep the future tenants inside, and the eagles outside when Jenny screamed KRIS, as she ran across the rope bridge. The little girl grabbed my arm, trying to catch her breath.

  “There’s a man coming … a wagon… street,” she said, struggling to breathe and talk at the same time.

  “Where,” I asked.

  She pointed and I ran to the corner of the roof to get a better look. A box type wagon was several blocks away and approaching our fence. I turned and slung my bow over my shoulder and raced to the nearest Jacobs ladder. We’d fashioned rope ladders with wooden rungs and hung them from the roof tops. I didn’t let anyone use them, they were for emergencies only. This seemed close enough so I swung over and made my way down to the street and within minutes I stood behind our fence, arrow drawn and ready.

  The wagon moved slowly, taking forever to make its way up the street. Drawn by two huge brown horses, they reminded me of smaller version of beer wagon horses. A man dressed in black sat on the bench with the reins laced through his fingers. My stomach began to ease as I identified the Tinker sitting in the seat; no way was he connected with the raiders.

  Keeping a sharp lookout, I noticed Schick/Shuck joining me at the fence and directed them to lower their weapons as I lowered mine.

  “I thought it might be you,” The Tinker said as he pulled his huge horses to a stop, a look of surprise crossing his face when his gaze rose to look over my shoulder.

  I turned and saw that everyone had come to the street to see our new visitor. We made a large crowd in these times of individual loners.

  He was about forty years old with wrinkled brow and penetrating brown eyes that could stare right through you when he wanted. I watched his face as he scanned the crowd. I could tell he was sensing for danger signs and trying to catalog information. Finally he relaxed, his shoulder losing their tenseness. Smiling he asked if he could join us for the night.

  I told Schick to open the fence and let him in. He parked the wagon in front of the library, looking around trying to figure out the set up. Claire had to pull Jenny and Ellen out of the way; they wanted to pet the horses and were fascinated by the huge beasts.

  “Let me get them unhitched and you can feed them their oats,” The Tinker said. “They’re gentler than kittens,” he said in an aside to Claire, Instantly recognizing the true authority figure in the group.

  He worked smoothly and efficiently, removing the harness and horse collars and leading the behemoths to an old fountain full of rain water and let them drink there fill.

  “I don’t suppose anyone would like to lead them to the park and let them go, they’re too lazy to wander far and I’ll pick ‘em up in the morning.”

  Both little girls started jumping up and down yelling. Me! Me! Me!

  The Tinker clipped a leading rope to each of their halters and handed the other end to a girl, laughing at the awe and joy that spread over them.

  I told Schick/Shuck to follow them and make sure they were ok. Both boys grabbed their cross bows and followed. Margaret joined them with a bucker, “I want some manure for the garden,” she said to my questioning look.

  “Aren’t you worried about dog attacks?” Claire asked.

  “No dogs are going to mess with those two, not as long as they‘ve got room to move around.” Claire accepted the explanation and held out her hand, introducing herself and shooting me a look that reminded me of my duties.

  “Um, I’m sorry, Tinker, I’d like to introduce you to Claire, and this is Hector, our mad genius, and finally Susan.”

  The Tinker shook each of their hand, lingering over Susan’s. They stared at each other for a moment then separated. Susan blushed a little, and I swear she batted her eyes. He smiled from ear to ear like a cat with a dead canary.

  “Well Kristopher, why don’t you show me what you’ve done around here,” He said “And then latter, maybe we can do a little trading.”

  “I don’t think we have anything you could want, not anything you couldn’t pick up in town somewhere,” Hector said.

  “Oh I don’t know, got to trade something or the trip wouldn’t be worth it you know. I’m sure we’ll find something of interest,” The Tinker said, quickly glancing at Susan.

  His eyes lit up when he saw all the books. He said he knew that most people used to get their books via the net and few if any read the old paper kind. It was obviously the city hadn’t gotten around to closing this place down, thank god. He walked through the aisles running his fingers gently over book spines, stopping occasionally to pull one out and handing it to Hector with a smile. “Trading goods,” he said.

  We spent the next several hours touring the roof tops, Margaret’s garden was growing like a jungle. I’d built a tarp covered gazebo with benches placed to catch the breeze.

  We showed him the chicken coop and explained about using fishing nets to catch chickens in the park. The birds had settled in well in their roof top aerie and were fully protected by the chain link fence which provided two hundred square feet of room to hunt and peck outside and return to their nice safe wooden coop at night. One of the three hens started laying a few days ago and we were excited about the first brood due in a few weeks. I explained that we’d decided to put off gathering eggs until we had a full flock. I didn’t want the Tinker thinking that eggs were a commodity for trading, Jenny would have killed me. She’d assumed full responsibility for them and worried so much. Every day she hauled armful’s of grass to the roof to spread around and give the birds something to work through.

  The Tinker smiled and complimented us on how great everything was. Giving me a strange look, as if he wanted to say something, but decided to hold off.

  When Hector started showing him our water system, The Tinker became truly fascinated, asking all types of questions, his eyes soaking up every detail. I could almost see the thoughts racing through his head, where could he sell this idea and for how much. Hector explained about how he’d hooked a bunch of fire hoses together and attached them to a farm windmill he set up on the other street. He’d found it in the feed store at the edge of town, the same place we’d found the sacks of chicken feed.

  It had been easy to hook the hoses to the windmill but took forever to prime them, sending water all the way down the hose to the river. Filling it enough so that the pumps could get suction. We had run it for three days filling a portable swimming pool. One of those four foot high thirty feet across ones.

  “Then, we did the same thing on the roof of the warehouse,” he said, showing him the fire hose dipping in a big loop from the t
aller building down to the library roof. “I fed it down stairs and we use it for filling the commodes so that we can flush the toilets,” he said, beaming with pride.

  “Indoor plumbing, One of the true hallmarks of civilization,” The Tinker said with admiration.

  “We also built a shower stall over here; we use the run off for the vegetable beds.” Susan added, pointing to the small wooden cube and the green garden hoses that ran across the roofs asphalt tiles. It was unusual for her to interject. I thought I knew why when the Tinker smiled at her and asked if he might use it later.

  “Dinner’s ready,” Claire called from down stairs through the open stairwell door.

  We made our way down and joined the younger kids as they set the table.

  Claire look flustered and bothered, she’d cooked a venison stew on the wood stove and the room was hot and stuffy despite the draft we’d created by opening all of the doors and windows and having the hot air rise out through the roof door.

  I walked over and gave her a quick hug, “It smells wonderful, anything I can do to help,” I asked.

  She smiled up to me and shook her head, then nudged me towards the table saying, “Get everyone situated and I’ll start serving.”

  Tinker sat next to me and everyone grabbed a seat as Claire placed the steaming pot of stew in the center of the table where I started ladling a bowl and passing it along. The meal had that hearty meaty smell that made your mouth water.

  “Wonderful my dear, truly wonderful,” The Tinker said to Claire who flushed and beamed with pride. I think serving a visitor, an adult at that, was important to Claire; she wanted things to go well and had a habit of overly worrying about that type of thing.

  Everyone peppered the Tinker with questions about where he’d been and what he did, Ellen and Jenny’s questions revolved around the horses. He answered each question patiently and with lively stories about what he’d seen.