Worthwhile

by Lynne Silver

  “Did you have fun?” They arrived at her car, and he opened the trunk to toss her beach bag in.

  She smiled. “I did. A lot of fun. Thank you.”

  They both leaned a hip against the side of the car and faced each other.

  “Sorry we were a little later coming to dock than promised. We had to go slow because there were manatees in the harbor,” he said, and she beamed at him. “Olivia,” he said, and she looked up at his face, wanting to remove his sunglasses to better read his expression. Then he did it for her, tearing them off and tossing them onto the roof of the car.

  She could better see his face, but didn’t know how to interpret his expression. “Yes?” she asked.

  “I know what you think of me, but I…” He ran a hand through his hair. “Shit,” he muttered.

  She grabbed his forearm. “Tell me. I want to hear.”

  “I like you,” he said simply. “I know you probably don’t want to hear it, but it’s the truth. Do you ever see a situation in which we could be something more?” he asked.

  She blinked, his question the last thing she was expecting. Her top teeth bit down on her lower lip, and a little thrill went through her, because after today, the answer was yes. She wanted more with him.

  She smiled and he leaned down to gently touch his lips to hers, and all her pent-up longing from the day rushed forward. She grabbed his head, pulling him lower and tighter against her to deepen the kiss.

  He caught her intentions immediately and tugged her against him, keeping his large palm flat on her bare back. The tiny triangles of her bikini were between them, and the fabric rubbed at her hardened nipples.

  She wanted more, and only he could give it to her. She pressed her hips closer to his, seeking the friction she craved. Her reward was feeling him harden against her intimately. He groaned and obviously tried to temper his response, but she was having none of it.

  She’d been like a dam, trying to spring free, and now she couldn’t contain the rush. Nor did she want to. Drew’s little experiment of breaking her out of her confined life was working too well if the result was her getting busy in a public parking lot.

  They devoured each other, racing to get closer, and more intimate. She’d never been kissed like this in her life, and had never given her all to a man the way she was giving everything she had, everything she was, to Drew.

  He gave her ass a final squeeze and nibbled at her lips before wrenching back. She wasn’t ready for his retreat, and grasped at the car, stumbling to gain her equilibrium. “Wow. I’ll take that as a yes to exploring more between the two of us?” he asked. His eyes looked glazed, and she knew she’d have to catch her breath before trying to drive home with her pupils in their current dilated state.

  She couldn’t find words at first and nodded. “That was some kiss.”

  “That was a hell of a lot more than a kiss.” He shook his head. “I know we need to take it slow, but with a kiss like that…” He gave another headshake.

  “What if I don’t want to take it slow? What if I’m ready to explore?”

  He blinked at her, unsure of what she was asking. He also became aware that a lot of time had passed and he’d left Carlos alone on the boat to clean it down and close it up for the day. “Come back to the boat with me so we can talk.” He held out his hand, but she shook her head.

  “Can’t. My parents are expecting me for dinner. They’ve been pretty lenient with me and my newly crazy schedule. I don’t want to keep them waiting.”

  “Got it. Call me later?”

  She smiled shyly. “Maybe.”

  He groaned. “Olivia. You can’t drop a bomb on me then sashay away.”

  “I’m not sashaying.” She pulled open the door to her car. “I’m driving.” She sank into the driver’s seat and shut the door. He heard the car engine turn on, and he grabbed his sunglasses, then stepped out of the way to allow her to reverse out of the spot.

  She pulled out and then positioned the car to exit the lot, but before she did, she stopped and rolled down her window. He stepped closer to hear her better.

  “Ask me out on a date,” she ordered.

  Like a robot, he said, “Olivia will you go out with me?”

  She gave a light laugh. “Nope. But I will meet you at OCXA tomorrow night.” With that, she sped off leaving him to stare after her in bewilderment.

  At ten o’clock, Olivia stepped out of her car in the paid parking lot two blocks from Drew’s club. She wished she could’ve called a taxi or an Uber, but her parents would’ve interrogated her if they thought she was going somewhere she might be drinking. Instead they thought she was seeing a movie with a girlfriend. She hated lying to them as if she were in high school, but until she was married they saw her as a child.

  As she walked toward the club, the sounds of the music spilled out, and she bypassed the long line of people waiting outside as Drew had told her to do. Hesitantly she approached the man at the door and gave her name. He spoke into a headset, then gestured that she should enter.

  “Drew’s meeting you right here. Come inside, but don’t wander away.”

  She nodded silently and followed his instructions. It took a minute for Drew to come find her, but she was grateful, because it gave her a chance to look around and for her eyes and ears to adjust to the sensory overload.

  “Olivia.” Drew walked up to her, looking way too good in a white button-down, open at the collar.

  “Hi.” She turned her cheek for him to greet her with a kiss. “Do you have an office or a bathroom I can borrow for a minute?”

  “Sure.”

  She followed him through the club, already pulsing with bodies, despite being told that nothing got started until at least eleven. He led her into a small office in the back. She immediately knew which desk was his because it was utilitarian with only a computer and box for files on it.

  The other desk must belong to Ian, a suspicion confirmed by the framed wedding photo of him and Cat.

  “Everything all right?” he asked, leaning back against his desk.

  “Yes. I want to change.”

  “Change? Why? You look great.”

  She gave him a look. “For a movie or dinner with a friend, but not for OCXA.” Carefully, she stepped out of her shoes, then shimmied out of her jeans, pulling down her tight little dress to cover her butt. Her thin cotton cardigan came off next, revealing the tight little black dress her mom had assumed was a camisole. Enjoying Drew’s reaction, and almost feeling as if she were tempting him with a mini striptease, she gave a little shimmy to get her cleavage in place, then straightened. “Now I’m ready.”

  His eyes were wide as he looked at her. “Holy shit.”

  “A little trick I picked up in high school. I’m not the nun you think I am.”

  “Catholic School girls rule,” was his response.

  “Let’s go dance.” Now that she fit in better with the other women she’d seen dancing, she couldn’t wait to go join the crowd.

  “Hang on.” He tugged her to him. “Can I kiss you hello?”

  Heck yeah. This was why she was here, after all. She smiled and inched closer to him. In her high heels, her face was closer to him and their bodies lined up differently than the other times they’d pressed against each other. She wasn’t in a bikini this time, but her dress fit like a second skin, and he wasted no time getting his hand cupping her ass, pulling her snug against him.

  Their lips found each other, and they were becoming experts on the way the other person felt. She knew he’d start off softly nibbling at her lower lip, then tease her with his tongue, daring her to part her lips. Then he’d swoop in to taste her.

  She’d had enough kisses in her lifetime to know the good from the bad, and Drew’s were in a whole different zone. She lied to herself that they weren’t from his expertise and many years of practice on legions of women. Maybe he was a naturally good kisser.

  Whatever the case, she wasn’t complaining because she was the beneficiary o
f his prowess. He seemed to like her skills too, if his groan and roving hands were any indication.

  He kept her against him, letting her feel every inch, but he pulled his face away to say, “We should leave.”

  “Huh?” She was in a stupor, unable to process language.

  “You’re too delicious. I want to keep you in here all night, but I’m needed out there.”

  “Oh.” Then she remembered that she wanted to be out there dancing. “All right. Let’s go dance.” She took a step to the door, but he pulled her back to look down at her seriously.

  “Hang on. What’s happening here, Olivia? I need to understand.”

  She cocked her head and looked up at him. “There’s nothing to understand. You asked what would happen if we could be more. You said you know what I think of you, but you don’t. Here’s what I think. I don’t need or want a man to change for me. Either he wants me enough to make me a priority or not. If you could be that man, sure, maybe we’d have a future. Otherwise, we’re going to be friends who kiss.”

  He didn’t respond, and she plunged forward bravely. “I also decided to listen to you about freeing myself from my parents’ strict rules when it comes to dating and sex. I want to learn and you’re going to be my teacher.”

  With that, she headed out of the office and straight into a crowd of people dancing off their work day. She glanced behind her to see Drew staring after her slack-jawed.

  She crooked a finger at him. “Come dance,” she shouted.

  He looked dazed, but followed orders. At that moment the DJ switched it from a thumping beat to more of a Latin beat that called for a partner to do it right. Without missing a step, Drew swung her into his arms and led her in a dance as if they’d been practicing for weeks for this moment.

  In a way they had. What was flirting and kissing if not an elaborate dance?

  “You’re pretty good,” Drew called to her over the music.

  “Colombian,” she said, in her one-word explanation. “You?”

  “College. Was chasing a girl who was a dance major.”

  For some reason, she found that hilarious and burst into laughter. He spun her into a move that had her catching her breath, but he safely kept a hold of her wrist and brought her back up against him. Now they started to move more like it was a Lambada, and all around them, couples were doing the same. For a moment, she stilled her movements because it started to feel like a giant orgy where they were surrounded by couples all mimicking the sex act, albeit fully clothed.

  But then Drew used two fingers to catch her chin and refocus her on his face. She became aware of other sensations and the rest of the crowd melted away as Drew occupied all of her attention. With his thigh between her legs and his hands on her hips, she moved in time with the music, hyper aware of how he felt between her legs.

  He bent his head to plant a row of tiny kisses on her bare shoulder, leading to her neck, ending with her lips. She leaned in to deepen the kiss when two men walked over and broke the moment. Drew straightened, keeping hold of her waist.

  “There a problem?” he said to the men she didn’t recognize, but who’d come up to stand too close for comfort.

  They grinned at Drew who didn’t return the smile. “We went to high school with your girl. We came over to say hi,” one guy said.

  She stiffened, the night suddenly taking on a new tone. She had no interest in saying hi to guys from high school. God, what if they said something about her being Olivia the Giver? She tried to pull away from Drew, but he kept his grip on her.

  One guy held out a hand toward her. “Good to see you, Olivia.” She wasn’t imagining it; he was looking at her as if he could see right through her clothes. Like she was still the girl who’d take him to the bathroom and give him a blow job.

  She might’ve nodded, maybe even shaken his hand, but she was suddenly numb.

  “Want to dance?” one of them asked.

  She felt, rather than saw, Drew scowl and try to pull her closer in to his body, but she resisted. “The lady’s not interested.”

  “What’s your problem, man?”

  Drew glared, his hold on her hand almost painful. “My problem is that you interrupted my dance with her. And then you asked her to dance indicating you have no manners. This is my house, and in my house, I demand manners. You’re no longer welcome.” He made a subtle head gesture, and two burly men appeared as if out of thin air and surrounded the two men from her past.

  When they were gone, Drew tried to coax her into relaxing back into dancing, but the moment was broken. She wasn’t lighthearted and fun anymore. She was a hypocrite. God, what if Drew knew she’d been a total slut back in high school, and now she derided him for the same behavior? He’d probably hate her.

  “Olivia, what’s going on?” he shouted over the music.

  She shrugged his hand off her shoulder and stalked off the dance floor, back to his office. She realized her heart was pounding and her stomach was one big giant knot. It had been years, nearly a decade, since she’d spoken to guys from her high school. She’d thought the past was behind her, but now she saw it would never be gone. At least in her heart.

  They got to his office and he stood away from her, eyeing her with a quizzical look. “What was that about? Why did seeing guys from your high school upset you so much?”

  She shrugged. “It wasn’t that. I’m just tired. I’m not used to being out this late. If you don’t mind, I’m going home.”

  He stepped closer. “Bullshit. You do crazy hours at the hospital all the time. I think those guys upset you.”

  She shook her head. “No. Not really.” Truth. Sort of. If things with Drew got serious—unlikely--she’d tell him about her past, but a first date was for fun, not for dark confessions. Drew didn’t need to know.

  He reached with his hand to twine his fingers in hers, and she allowed it because she’d allow almost anything when it came to this man touching her. “Olivia. We were having fun. Why are you letting those guys ruin it?”

  Tears sprang into her eyes, and she mutely shook her head. “I don’t want to talk about it, Drew. Leave it alone and let me go.” She jerked her hand free and started to try to leave the office, but he caught up with her easily and stopped her by putting a hand on her shoulder.

  “I’ll be walking you to your car,” he said.

  “No need.”

  He gave her a look, which she correctly interpreted as don’t bother arguing because I’ll be walking you regardless.

  “Fine. Whatever.”

  “Don’t forget your clothes.” He turned and bent to grab the jeans and cardigan on his desk and handed them to her.

  “Turn around,” she ordered.

  “You let me watch before,” he said. “Best striptease of my life.”

  “I didn’t strip.”

  He shrugged. “Close enough.” But he didn’t argue more, and turned, giving her his back. She swallowed her tears and pulled on her clothes.

  “Ready.”

  He turned around and took her hand to walk her through his club. They stayed silent the entire two blocks to her car. When she went to open her door and get in the car, Drew pulled her by the hand in a suave move that had her pushed against the car frame and his front pressed to hers.

  “You don’t trust me yet enough to tell me what the hell happened on the dance floor tonight. But someday you will.”

  She opened her mouth to protest and say that there was nothing to tell, but he leaned in and started to do his thing where he coaxed his way into her mouth with his soft lips and tongue until she was kissing him with urgency.

  Her hands tangled in his hair as he caged her in his arms against the car. It was a trap she loved. It felt as if she’d been floating wildly untethered for the longest time, and at long last, she’d found her anchor. She’d lied to both him and herself when she’d told him they’d only be friends. She wanted him to see her as worthwhile enough to change his womanizing ways.

  She hoped he’d com
e to see a relationship as a good thing and not dead weight.

  No. Didn’t matter. She’d promised herself to keep emotions out of this. Drew could give her amazing kisses and other surprises along the way. Love, companionship, and monogamy would never be on his agenda, and as long as she remembered that, she’d protect her heart.

  They had tonight and she was determined to make the most of all the tonights they had before he moved on to his next woman and she agreed to settle down with one of the many nice men her father hoped for.

  He had her caged in, but he wasn’t using his body to hold her, and she craved his weight against her. Moving her hands from his head to his back, then to the base of his spine, she pulled him against her. His erection pushed at her, and she wished they weren’t in a public space so she could more thoroughly explore that body part of his.

  It had been too long since she’d seen or touched a penis, and she was dying to get her hands on Drew’s. From the feel of things, it’d be long and thick and gorgeous. She wondered how he’d taste.

  His mouth was delicious. The hint of beer and perhaps whiskey flowed from his mouth to her tongue, and she was feeling tipsy thanks to his drugging kisses.

  “Olivia,” he murmured.

  “Hmm.” She leaned up, seeking more of his mouth, but he’d pulled away a fraction of an inch.

  “We either need to find some place more private, or you need to go home.”

  She paused, realizing he was right.

  “I want this—you—too much. You make me forget where we are and what I’m supposed to be doing.”

  “Is that a bad thing?” she asked.

  “It is when we could get arrested for public indecency.”

  That was a bucket of cold water. She pushed back, her spine pressing against the car.

  He opened the door for her and helped her in.

  “Text me?” he asked.

  She nodded, feeling a bit dazed at all the ups and downs from the evening. She was glad they were ending on an up. She didn’t know if she would’ve had the courage to keep moving forward if Drew hadn’t walked her to her car and kissed her until she’d seen stars.