The Lonely Lady

by Harold Robbins

  “Oh, no!” She took a step after the cab. But it had already turned the corner. She stood there for a moment, blinking back the tears that suddenly came to her eyes.

  “Taxi, miss?” the doorman asked.

  “No, thank you.” The evening breeze was beginning to come in off the river as she boarded a cross-town bus on Fifty-seventh Street.

  The driver looked down at her hand as she held the bill toward him. A tone of disgust came into his voice. “For Christ’s sake, lady,” he said. “Can’t you rich East Side broads get it through your heads that there are poor people in this world?”

  “I’m sorry,” she said, searching in her bag and finding a quarter. She looked out the bus window and blinked. It really would be funny if it weren’t so sad.

  The only kindness she had known during the whole depressing day had come from a stranger, a woman whose name she had never thought to ask. But then they were both female in an alien world. Only a woman who had been there herself could sympathize with one who was there now. She was sorry she hadn’t taken the cab with her. It would have been good to have someone to talk to.

  Suddenly she thought of Licia. There was something about her that was solid and strong. Fred had said that she was into a lot of businesses. Maybe she would be able to help her find a job. She made up her mind to call her when she got back home.

  ***

  The downstairs buzzer sounded. She took a last quick look around the apartment as she went to press the button that unlocked the outside door. It looked as good as it ever could. She opened the door and waited.

  The sound of footsteps came from the landing below. “Up here,” she called. “One more flight.”

  Licia’s head appeared as she came up the stairs.

  “I forgot to tell you there was no elevator,” JeriLee said.

  Licia grinned. “That’s all right,” she said easily. “I never knew there was such a thing as elevators until I was fourteen years old.”

  JeriLee closed the door behind her. “I didn’t mean to interfere with your work.”

  “You’re not,” Licia replied. “I usually take Tuesday nights off.”

  “Would you like a drink?” JeriLee asked.

  “Do you have any fruit juice?”

  JeriLee shook her head. “Some white wine?”

  Licia hesitated. “Okay.”

  JeriLee quickly filled two glasses and gave her one. Licia sat down on the small couch and put the glass on the cocktail table. JeriLee sat opposite her, suddenly feeling awkward and embarrassed. She took a quick drink of the wine. “I shouldn’t have called you,” she said. “I’m sorry.”

  The black girl looked at her steadily. “But you did.”

  JeriLee’s eyes fell. “Yes. The roof was caving in. I felt I had to talk to somebody. The only one I could think of calling was you.”

  “What happened to the play? Fred told me that Fannon was going to do it.”

  “It wasn’t any good. I didn’t know it then but I know it now. I fucked up.”

  Licia’s voice was easy. “Those things happen. I put some money into a few shows. Nothing happened.”

  “Now I’ve got to get a job. I can’t fool around anymore.”

  “Fred told me that you wouldn’t take any more from him.”

  JeriLee nodded.

  “Why?”

  “Fred had his own plans. I had mine. They didn’t go together. It wouldn’t be right to take his money.”

  Licia was silent for a moment. “What kind of a job are you looking for?”

  “I don’t know,” JeriLee said. “I’m an out-of-work actress and an unsuccessful writer. The only thing I know is that I want to make enough money so that I can continue writing.”

  “How much would that take?” Licia asked.

  JeriLee laughed, embarrassed. “A lot more than I’m probably worth on the job market. At least a hundred and fifty, two hundred a week.”

  “That’s a lot of bread,” Licia said.

  “I know,” JeriLee said. “But this place costs me over two hundred a month with the utilities.”

  “What you need is some man to keep you,” Licia said.

  “Is that how you did it?”

  “Yes,” Licia said evenly. “I have an eight-year-old son. When he was born his father gave me twenty-five grand to get lost. He didn’t want his nice white world to get fucked up.”

  “I’m sorry,” JeriLee said quickly. “I had no right to say something like that.”

  “It all worked out,” Licia said quietly. “My boy lives in the country with my mother. And the friends I made when I was with his father helped me get started in business.”

  JeriLee emptied her glass and refilled it. “You don’t drink?” she asked, noticing that Licia’s wine was untouched.

  “Never liked it,” Licia said.

  “What’s happening with Fred?” she asked.

  “He’s working,” Licia said. “He’s in L.A. right now. He’s getting an album together for one of the record companies. When that comes out, they’re goin’ to send him around the country on a tour. They think he’s got a real good chance.”

  “I’m glad for him,” JeriLee said. “He’s a good person.”

  “You haven’t changed your mind about him?” Licia asked. “He still wants to marry you.”

  “No.” JeriLee shook her head. “It wouldn’t work. We make it in bed and we make it as friends. But that’s as far as it goes. If we did get married we’d only wind up tearing each other apart. There’s only room for one career in Fred’s life.”

  “You wouldn’t consider giving up yours?”

  “I would have remained married to my first husband if I felt that way.”

  Licia was silent for a moment. “Have you had dinner yet?”

  “No.”

  Licia smiled. “What do you say we get something to eat? Somehow problems never seem as heavy on a full stomach.”

  Chapter 9

  The Sawmill River Parkway was deserted. Disregarding the posted limit, Licia calmly moved the big car up to seventy miles an hour. JeriLee looked at the clock on the dashboard. It was almost nine thirty. “Are you sure it will be all right with your mother, bringing someone up to dinner at this hour of the night?”

  “My mother’s used to it. We’re all night people in my family.” She began to slow down. “Besides we’re almost there. We get off at the next exit.”

  “You like driving?” JeriLee asked.

  Licia nodded. “Especially this car.” She laughed. “It used to be a pimp’s hog. Man, when he got it he was on top of the world an’ he shit down on everybody. Then he got heavy into horse an’ completely lost control. His girls georgied on him an’ he had to sell it to feed the habit. I got it for practically nothing because he still had some payments on it. But he was one guy I didn’t mind shaftin’. He had to be the world’s number one prick.”

  They turned off the main road onto a narrow road that wound its way through the trees to the top of a small hill where a few houses were clustered. “We’re here,” she announced, pulling into the first driveway on the left.

  The front door opened as they got out of the car and a boy came running down the steps and across the lawn. “Mommy! Mommy!”

  Licia bent forward and he leaped into her arms. He put his arms around her neck. “You came just at the right time,” he said. “There’s nothing but commercials on.”

  Licia laughed and kissed him. “I swear you’re goin’ to wind up with square eyeballs from watchin’ the tube like that. JeriLee, this is my son, Bonny,” she said, putting him down. “Bonny, JeriLee.”

  The boy came to her, his hand outstretched. “Hello,” he said. “Do you like television?”

  JeriLee laughed. “Yes.”

  “Good,” Bonny said. “We can watch it together. There’s a good show just starting.”

  “You’re going to bed, young man.” The woman’s voice came from the open doorway. “You’ve got school tomorrow.”

 
Bonny turned back to Licia. “Mommy?”

  Licia took his hand and they started toward the house. “You heard Grandma.”

  “But you just got here,” he said. “I won’t even be with you.”

  She laughed. “You wouldn’t be with me anyway. You’d be with the TV.”

  Licia’s mother was a tall woman and if it weren’t for the fact that her hair was flecked with gray she might have passed for an older sister. Her smile was warm and her hand firm as JeriLee took it. “Nice to meet you,” she said.

  The house was warmly decorated. Bonny went right to the color television set. “Just ten more minutes,” he said.

  “Okay,” Licia’s mother answered. “Then you go right upstairs.”

  They went to the kitchen. A table had been set up on the screened-in back porch. A charcoal-fired barbecue was glowing in a corner. “I got steaks and salad,” Licia’s mother said. “I wasn’t expecting company.”

  “That’s fine with me,” JeriLee said.

  “I make great fried chicken, barbecued ribs and greens, but Licia won’t eat soul food. She says it’s too greasy an’ she’s always on a diet.”

  “Mother.” Licia laughed.

  “Okay,” her mother said. “You see if’n you kin get your son to bed. I’ll put the steaks on.”

  “How do you like yours cooked?” she asked JeriLee.

  “Rare.”

  “Like Licia.” The older woman sniffed. “I like mine cooked through. I don’t hold with eating raw meat.”

  JeriLee smiled. “Is there anything I can do to help?”

  “No. I’m used to managin’. But maybe you like a cold drink? We got all kinds of fruit juices. We don’t hold with liquor and no soda pop in this house.”

  “Anything you have will be fine, Mrs. Wallace.”

  “Licia likes orange juice, but my favorite is Hawaiian Punch.”

  “I’ll have some of that.”

  Mrs. Wallace smiled. “I’ll put ice cubes in it. Don’t taste as sweet that way.”

  The meat was sizzling when Licia returned. “Those steaks smell good,” she said.

  “I had the butcher at the A and P cut them special for me,” her mother said. “He didn’t charge me extra either.”

  “My mother’s got everybody in the A and P under her thumb,” Licia told JeriLee.

  Licia walked over to the grill. “The meat looks about ready to me.”

  Mrs. Wallace got out of her chair. “Now you come right back here an’ set down,” she commanded. “I’m the one who does the cookin’ in this house.”

  “Yes, Mother,” Licia said meekly. She looked over at JeriLee and smiled.

  JeriLee returned her smile without speaking.

  It was after eleven o’clock by the time they finished. During the meal, Licia’s mother didn’t stop talking. It was apparent that a week’s worth of problems and conversation had been stored up inside for this one night. Licia listened patiently—Bonny’s school, shopping, the plumber. All the normal trivia came pouring out. And in the telling there was a feeling of pride. She had coped. Licia’s approval was obviously very important to her mother. And the woman glowed when Licia gave it to her.

  Finally Licia said, “We’ll have to be gettin’ back to the city.”

  Her mother was surprised. “You’re not stayin’? I got your room all fixed up for you.”

  “Maybe JeriLee’s got some things to do in the morning, Mother,” Licia said.

  “Do you?” she asked bluntly.

  “I don’t want to put you out,” JeriLee said.

  “It’s no trouble,” Mrs. Wallace said quickly. “There are twin beds in Licia’s room.”

  Licia smiled. “My mother’s used to gettin’ her own way.”

  JeriLee nodded, got to her feet and picked up her plate. “Let me help you with the dishes,” she said.

  “You don’t have to do nothin’, girl,” Mrs. Wallace said. “We got an automatic KitchenAid dishwasher in this house.”

  ***

  There were three bedrooms on the upper floor. Licia had the master bedroom. It was in one corner of the house, separated from the other rooms by a large bathroom. Licia paused in the upper hallway and kissed her mother. “Good night, Mother.”

  “Good night, Mrs. Wallace. Thank you,” JeriLee said.

  The older woman nodded and went down the hall to her room. JeriLee followed Licia. A small lamp was glowing between the beds. Licia crossed to the bathroom. “I’ll put out a new toothbrush for you. I have extra nightgowns in the closet. I’ll get one for you.”

  “Thanks.” JeriLee walked to the open window and breathed deeply of the night air. It smelled fresh and green.

  Licia’s voice came from behind her. “Not much like the city.”

  “I’d almost forgotten what fresh air really smells like.”

  Licia took out a neatly pressed nightgown. She held it up. “This okay?”

  “Fine.”

  “You can use the bathroom first,” Licia said, holding the nightgown toward her.

  She took the gown and went into the bathroom, closing the door behind her. Quickly she undressed and folded her things neatly over the hanger. She took the toothbrush from its package and brushed her teeth, then washed her face. She had been feeling all right up to now but suddenly she was nervous. She rummaged through her purse. If she remembered correctly, there was a ten-mg Valium in her pill box. When she found it she swallowed it quickly. She felt reassured. Valium always put her to sleep.

  Licia smiled as she came through the doorway. “That gown’s a little big on you.”

  JeriLee looked down. The hem was dragging on the floor. “I guess it is,” she said.

  Licia gestured to the bed nearer the door. “This one’s yours.”

  JeriLee nodded. She went to the bed and sat down. Automatically she reached for a cigarette and lit it.

  Licia seemed to sense her nervousness. “Are you okay?”

  “I’ll be all right. It’s just been a bad day, that’s all.”

  “You don’t have to worry,” Licia said in a low voice. “I didn’t bring you up here to hit on you. I never figured we’d be staying.”

  “It’s okay. I’m glad you did. It’s the only good thing that’s happened to me all day.”

  “Good,” Licia said, going to the closet. Quickly she pulled her blouse off over her head and stepped out of her skirt. She reached behind her to unfasten the brassiere.

  JeriLee ground out her cigarette. When she looked up, Licia had slipped into a beige-colored peignoir that was almost the same color as her skin. JeriLee slid down into the sheets.

  Licia sat down on the other bed. “What do you think of my little family?” she asked.

  “There’s a lot of love here.”

  Licia smiled. “That’s why I keep them here. Ain’t no way you can get that feeling in the city.”

  “You’re doing the right thing.”

  “Bonny’s growin’ fast though,” Licia said. “A boy like that needs a father.”

  JeriLee didn’t speak.

  “You think he’d put Fred off?” Licia asked.

  “Fred loves kids,” JeriLee answered.

  “What about me?” Licia asked. “He ever say anything about me?”

  “Only that he liked you. He respects you.”

  “But he knows about me. He’s seen me with Sam.” Licia was silent for a moment. “It ain’t that I don’t like men, I just went off them. With them everything’s a battle. They don’t make love, they make war.”

  “Fred’s not like that. He’s a very gentle man.”

  Licia rose to her feet. “I don’t know,” she said hesitantly. “I got to think some more about it. I don’t want to make any mistakes.”

  “You won’t,” JeriLee said. “You’ll do the right thing.”

  “You really think so?”

  “I think so.”

  Licia smiled suddenly. “Enough of my problems. You go to sleep.” She turned off the light. “Good night.�
�

  “Good night.” JeriLee watched her go into the bathroom and close the door behind her. Then she looked up into the dark. After a few moments she heard the sound of the water running and closed her eyes. She didn’t hear Licia come out of the bathroom. She didn’t feel Licia’s kiss, light on her cheek, or hear her soft murmur. “Poor little baby.” She was fast asleep.

  Chapter 10

  The fucking California sunshine, she thought as she opened her eyes. Christ. What I wouldn’t give for just one rainy day.

  Then she was wide awake and thinking about Licia. For a moment she could almost smell the warm sweetness of her and the smooth sensation of the honey-colored skin against her fingers. Then she heard the voices through the closed bedroom door and the thought was gone.

  She sat up in the bed and listened. The voices, a man’s and a woman’s, were muted. Then the man’s voice grew more insistent. A moment later the door opened softly.

  Angela peeked into the room. “Are you awake?”

  “Yes.”

  “You were asleep when I looked in just a moment ago. I didn’t want to wake you.”

  “That’s okay. Who’s out there?”

  “George.”

  “Shit!” JeriLee said. “What does he want?”

  “I don’t know. He just said it was important that he see you. I’ll tell him to go away, that you’re not feeling well enough.”

  “No.” JeriLee swung her feet off the bed. George was too self-centered just to pay a courtesy call. It had to be something else. “I’ll see him. Just ask him to wait a minute while I go to the bathroom.”

  “Okay. You let me know when you’re ready. I’ll send him in.”

  “No. I’ll come out there.”

  “Don’t you think you should stay in bed?” Angela asked disapprovingly.

  “What for? I’m not sick. All I had was a lousy little abortion.”

  The door closed behind Angela, and JeriLee went into the bathroom. She sat down on the john and changed the tampon. She was bleeding more than she had in the morning and she was still sore. She took two aspirin and a Percodan for the pain. Then she washed her face with cold water. She began to feel better. She touched up her lips, used some rouge on her cheeks and brushed her hair quickly.