The Death of You

by Allyson Young

  “Oh, little one. The things we want to do to you. With you.”

  She wiggled her brows in a poor imitation of Gagne. “Maybe I have my own list.”

  “That will be the first order of business. You’ll write it out for us.” Crap. Homework.

  Connor’s head tilted and she caught the echo too. A dull chime of some kind. “That’ll be Lawrence. Come along and meet him. I want you to know what the entire team looks like.”

  “I want to do something to help.”

  “Oh, Maddy. I know it’s tough for a civilian to wait around, but we’ve got it in hand.”

  “That’s not it. I’m good with that. I’ll follow your orders. But can’t I fix some food or something? So you won’t be distracted.”

  “Done, Maddy. But thanks. Come and meet Lawrence.”

  She was fuming a little as she obediently traipsed behind him, back down that staircase. Pretty soon she’d feel like Scarlett. “Connor?”

  He halted, and let her catch up. “What?”

  “Who cleans?”

  “We have a housekeeper. And no, you’re not taking that on. You aren’t here to be a drudge.”

  “You’d better not say that around your housekeeper,” she said darkly. Now she knew who picked up the wet towels and probably all the other stuff they left lying around. Drudge indeed.

  “Mrs. Evans shops for staples, cleans, and does laundry. You won’t have time for that.” There was no need for him to spell out what would be occupying her time. Maddy’s sex dampened and the crotch of her jeans rubbed suggestively against the gusset of her panties. Her bottom didn’t hurt at all anymore, the heat transferring to her pussy.

  “We’ll talk,” he promised.

  She needed to quit being so selfish and let him attend to the real issues. The worry rose up and swamped her arousal. She admonished herself to get her head in the game.

  Lawrence turned out to be a ginormous black man with the gentlest handshake ever. Bald, with a scar across his forehead, he looked terrifying, but Maddy sensed the sweet bear deep inside and treated him in kind. He reminded her of Master Thomas but even bigger. Connor tugged her back and glared at Lawrence, who shrugged, huge shoulders rolling with muscle. “Pleased to meet you, sweet girl. Wanna bring me up to speed, Con?”

  “I’ll brief you in the den.”

  Maddy watched the interaction and thought maybe Connor had been the head guy of the bunch. “Did you guys have ranks?”

  The silence that fell told her of a major gaffe, but she had no idea what she’d said.

  “We don’t use ranks, Maddy. Keeps the bad guys from targeting the leader.” Connor patted her hand.

  Oh jeez. She had to ask and now could worry about that too. “Makes sense. Nice to meet you too, Lawrence.”

  Connor pulled her back to the stairs. “Go upstairs and relax, read, whatever, honey. Wake Rafe in two hours. Ask him to show you the playroom.”

  “Okay.” She was going to be cooperative and not give him anything else to worry about. And she wasn’t averse to lying beside Rafe, reading and watching him sleep. Maybe take a peek at the playroom.

  “The door to the playroom is coded, Maddy. So you’ll wait on Rafe. And once he’s up you can explain to him why you were punished.”

  She should have known. Subs didn’t get away with anything at Vantage, and her Doms were part of the training program, after all. “I will. Master.”

  As she hoped, Connor responded to the title. He seemed to grow in stature and she resolutely didn’t look at his crotch. “Good girl. Now scoot.”

  She scooted, running upstairs, knowing Connor watched her go, and made her way to the master bedroom. Rafe slept the sleep of—well, maybe not the just, but certainly he slept. She’d have thought he was a light sleeper, considering his training, but maybe he felt safe. It warmed her heart to think he felt that way, as she went to sort through her things for her e-reader. Returning to the bed, she looked around and saw the door to the playroom.

  It was set nearly flush with the wall, a flat panel, with only the keypad to indicate it was actually a door. She stared at it and hoped the next two hours went quickly, because she wanted to see how it was set up. Carefully climbing onto the bed, she curled into what was definitely her spot, and lit up her reading device. She’d concentrate on one of her murder mysteries, the one where the bad guys got theirs and the hero got the girl. The sex wasn’t as hot as what she’d recently experienced, but that was okay. She wasn’t going to think about anything other than her book, watching over one of her Doms as he recharged, while the other firmed up the preparations.

  Chapter Eight

  Rafe took his time opening his eyes. He’d had sufficient rest, but he knew their submissive was cuddled up beside him and he wanted to soak in the sensation. A strange whisper of sound piqued his curiosity and he cracked an eye to see Maddy flick her finger across the screen of an e-reader in rapid succession. He lay quietly, watching her read, minute changes of expression accompanying each page she perused. At one point she reached up to push back a strand of her multicolored hair, and Rafe wanted to touch his tongue to the slight indentation where her cheek and ear joined. He wasn’t typically soft, and Maddy needed a firm hand, but damned if her vulnerability didn’t call to some previously unknown part in him.

  He knew when she became aware he was awake. Her finger hesitated and she tensed slightly, then tilted her head his way. The smile that lit her pretty face made her breathtakingly beautiful because it was full of promise and sincere pleasure.

  “I was going to wake you in a few minutes.” That smile dimmed and she turned her attention to the reading device, fiddling with the button on the bottom, the screen going blank.

  “Maddy?”

  “Connor got word. His flag was picked up. The…response could be as soon as—” She turned her head and glanced at the clock on the nightstand. “Well, you probably have time to get dressed.”

  Rafe rolled off the bed, careless of his nudity, slipping into combat mode without another thought. He crossed to the closet, then cursed. His clothes were still in his former room. Maddy was huddled on the bed, watching him, no longer smiling at all, and he held out his hand. “I have to go down the hall.”

  She joined him without a word and they went to find his clothes. She perched on the bench at the foot of the bed while he pulled on some black cargo pants over his usual boxers, adding a black T-shirt before stomping into a pair of boots. Kneeling, he laced first one, then the other, Maddy watching him solemnly. He longed to climb back into bed and wake up to her smiling at him all over again.

  “It’ll be fine, sweetheart.” He sounded as though he believed it because he did. Unless this Ryker had the ability to level the place, raze it to the ground, he wasn’t getting within a mile of Maddy. And not even then. She was worrying for nothing.

  “I know. I’m trying not to think about it, is all.”

  After the months she’d spent, waiting for the axe to fall, and now faced with the end game—Rafe likened it to all those ops he and Connor and countless other people had endured. Only she’d done it by herself. She was remarkable and he, for one, would never forget it. But now it was time for her to give up the burden and let him and Connor shoulder it. There was no comparison, one little subbie against an asshole like Ryker—or him and Connor taking her place. He yanked her into his arms and she welded her body against him.

  “It’ll be okay.”

  Breathing in the scent of her hair, he closed his eyes and shared his certainty and strength, their heartbeats synchronizing. Stepping back, he gripped her biceps. “We’ll take care of it and you.”

  “Connor said for you to show me the playroom.”

  Indefatigable. If he retained any connection to his native roots he’d have asked an elder to suggest a name for Maddy, something representative of her tenacity. He fit a headset on and dialed it in. Connor answered instantly. “What?”

  “Anything?”

  “Not yet.”

&
nbsp; “I’ll show Maddy the playroom, then.”

  “See if you can encourage her to stay inside, because that’s where she’s going when the balloon goes up.”

  Rafe laughed. “Still using that old adage, Con? I prefer when the shit hits the fan. But I’ll be a diplomat.”

  “Since when?”

  “I’m capable of learning new skills.”

  “She tends to bring that out in us, buddy.” Connor’s voice was packed with emotion for a moment. “She tell you why she got paddled?”

  Rafe’s focus narrowed on Maddy, who tilted her head like a little bird. She blinked her eyes wide.

  “No. She didn’t. We’ll be in the playroom and the coms won’t necessarily work well in there, so you send somebody if anything happens.”

  “Will do.” Connor chuckled and signed off.

  “What?” Maddy tilted her head again. “What didn’t I do?”

  “Why did you get paddled? You were supposed to tell me.”

  “Oh. I was planning to but you went into battle mode or something and I was a little intimidated. And it was hot watching too.”

  “Maddy.”

  Her hands reached behind her to cover her butt cheeks, an involuntary action he assumed, by the way she snatched them back. She looked at the floor. “I challenged Connor about the dogs. In front of Gagne and Benedett. It was wrong and I know it but I got caught up in the reality when I met them.”

  She voiced it all in a rush, and he saw her take a deep breath. “He welt you good?”

  “Yes. And put me in the corner.” There was distinct distaste in her tone, and Rafe filed it away. Definitely a means of punishment. Maddy obviously didn’t care for humiliation, something that suited both him and Connor, but they’d use it if the occasion called for it.

  “Are you totally clear?”

  “About why he spanked me? Yes. I regret it, especially because we weren’t alone.”

  Rafe swallowed a chuckle. Maddy wouldn’t take orders easily, outside of a scene, at least not those she didn’t feel were fair or didn’t make sense to her. But she didn’t like to disappoint, so they could work around it with better communication. And sometimes she’d simply have to accept their edict—or lose. It was the way of their burgeoning relationship and he and Connor would do whatever was in her best interest. If they fucked up, and they likely would, they’d make it up to her.

  “Okay.” He didn’t miss her relief when he let the matter drop. Well, he hated being lectured too, regarded it as an insult to his intelligence, and it tended to detract from the lesson. It didn’t stop him from patting her on her abused bottom however, before he urged her down the hall, back to the master suite and the playroom. “Let’s do the tour while we have the time.”

  Punching in the code, he ensured Maddy knew the sequence. With her memory he didn’t have to repeat it. The panel swung open silently, and Rafe wondered if they should make the hinges squeak or something to build the anticipation, but Maddy’s rounded eyes were enough. He stepped in and she followed.

  Flicking on the lights, he allowed her some time to look around, wondering if she saw what he did; carefully chosen illumination over the cross, the stocks and the spanking bench, not to mention the piece of furniture that served as both an examination and massage table. The rest of the room was swallowed in gloom, hints of the implements of pain and pleasure he and Connor favored hanging on the walls or stored in open-faced cabinets. Nothing overtly hidden, merely shadowed, and certain to titillate and challenge an eager little subbie.

  “Wow. It’s like Vantage, if on a smaller scale,” she breathed. “More intimate.”

  Rafe shrugged. “It’s our kink, sweetheart. Glad you like it.”

  “I’m surprised you spend any time at the club, with what you’ve got here.”

  Was she fishing? He hoped so, because any hint of Maddy feeling proprietary was most welcome, seeing how possessive he was of her. “We like the social aspect and we take our training opportunities seriously. Besides, how else would we meet submissives?”

  As soon as his flippant remark left his mouth, he regretted it. Maddy’s eyes dropped, but not before he saw the flash of hurt. And hadn’t he just been congratulating himself on their connection? He tried to retrieve it. “We wouldn’t have met you, otherwise.”

  A tremulous smile, then she began to walk the room. He traipsed after her, his confidence slightly shaken. Damn, he needed Connor for this kind of stuff. Maddy inspected every toy and assorted implements with what seemed like exacting care, her hands clasped behind her back, leaning slightly forward from the waist. Rafe thought to ask her what she was thinking, but contented himself with reading her body language instead. She was aroused and somewhat uncertain, and at length she turned to him. Finally. He breathed a sigh of relief.

  “Do you…use all of these?” Her bottom lip caught between her teeth, she gestured, wide-eyed, at one particular display.

  Rafe checked it out. “We’re trained in everything you see, Maddy. But you have your safe word.”

  “Oh, right. Good. I mean, I’ve seen some of those things on the Net but I don’t think I want piercings or tattoos or anything to do with fireplay.”

  His gut clenched, because although he’d asked her to trust him in regard to the scarring on her shoulder, he hadn’t explained the reason for it. She’d also acquiesced while under a certain sexual encouragement. “We’ll see how we go,” he promised. “Not a lot of time to discuss things right now.”

  With another uncertain look, Maddy nodded, and her face tightened as she obviously remembered their situation. The playroom was a good distraction only for a short time.

  “I guess we should go downstairs?”

  A scuffle at the door, accompanied by a short, excited bark made them both whirl to face the commotion. Anann and Hannibal bounded in, stubby tails wagging frantically and Maddy dropped to her knees, arms spread wide. Rafe liked their woman on her knees, but fought back a smile at the utter lack of eroticism. The Dobermans slid to a stop, their toenails skittering on the polished floor, their whimpers of joy increasing. He and Connor cared about the dogs, and gave them rough affection and good care, but they were hardly pets. Until their pet unraveled that premise.

  “Hannibal! Anann!” Maddy’s cries of greeting filled the room as she hugged them both, the bitch’s long muzzle sliding alongside her face, the dog’s head resting on her other shoulder.

  Rafe saw Connor ease inside, the other man lifting both hands in a “what can you do?” gesture. Maddy gave Connor a wide smile. Men fought wars on the strength of smiles like that.

  “The dogs don’t usually come into the playroom,” Rafe observed.

  “They never come in here,” Connor retorted. “But Maddy will be spending some time alone, and I thought she’d appreciate the company.”

  Maddy got to her feet, the dogs moving to flank her. “Is he here? Is it starting?”

  “A drive by. Two big SUVs and no reason for them to be out this far that we can tell. Rentals, and to a company that has some pretty convoluted ownership. Sounds reasonable to assume it’s Ryker. What we don’t know is if he’ll wait until dark or try something before.”

  Anann and Hannibal pressed close to her, and Maddy’s visibly trembling hands gripped their necks. When Connor stepped forward, she shook her head. “I’m fine. Really. And Ryker’s like a snake. He’ll strike when you least expect and he’s got that eerie patience going on.”

  His buddy nodded as though she hadn’t shared the info before, and Rafe realized she’d really pushed him to get her butt spanked earlier. He kept from smiling at Connor’s rather obvious olive branch. Two olive branches who were presently serving as some additional support to their sub and shedding everywhere.

  Maddy lifted her head high. “What do you want me to do?”

  Rafe would have done absolutely anything in the world for her at that point, as she held it together and left them to do their job. He didn’t voice any of that, knowing she needed him to b
e matter-of-fact. “You stay in here with the dogs. There’s stuff in the fridge tucked in the corner. You need the bathroom first?”

  “I’m good.”

  “Then we’ll see you in a bit.” He moved to her and brushed her lips with his, as gentle a contact as she’d ever get from him, and stepped back for Connor to do the same.

  “You stay in here, Maddy. Nobody comes in but Rafe or me. And you do not come out, no matter what. Clear?”

  “Clear.”

  It was fucking hard to walk away, and from the way Connor shut the panel on the playroom with a definite snap, his buddy suffered from the same reluctance.

  “Best place for her, Con.” He tactfully didn’t mention the dogs who were worth their weight in gold when it came to patrol and sneak attacks. Time to bust Connor’s balls for that later.

  “Right. Now let’s get the job done.”

  ****

  The weapons were already out of the secured room and laid on the desk. The other men had presumably chosen their poison, and Rafe took his, a Glock he favored, with a silencer, and a suppressed semi-automatic rifle. Connor would have his Browning and probably an AR 15. He filled his ammo pouches with clips before checking the magazines on both weapons, leaving them where he could grasp them immediately. The usual calm that descended before the shit hit the fan, lowered to steady his hands.

  “Somebody’s walking up to the gate. The SUVs must be parked a fair piece away as we can’t pick them up from any angle.” Lawrence spoke in his usual rumbling tone from his languid pose in front of the screens. Rafe knew from experience that the big guy could move as quick as any grizzly and people underestimated him at their own peril.

  As if on cue, the intercom buzzed and Connor hit the call button. “Yes?”

  “He sounds like the freaking butler,” Lawrence offered, and Rafe nearly smiled at the look his buddy shot the big man.

  A deep male voice emanated from the speaker. “I’d like to speak to the owner.”

  Connor pitched his voice differently and answered. “Here. And you are?”