A Civilian for Silo

by J. A. Hornbuckle

  “He’ll be in the recovery room for another couple of hours before we transfer him to ICU. If all goes as it should, he’ll be released in a week.” I thanked him the only way I knew how, since my voice didn’t want to work.

  And the surgeon, the man who’d worked on my Silo, seemed to take my tight, firm hug in stride before I went downstairs to share the good news.

  Shelly and Julie were still in the ER waiting room and had been joined by almost the entire Hellion Billings chapter as well as the Honeys. When I recapped what the doctor had told me, there were more than a few shaky smiles, sniffles and wet eyes, which had me releasing some of my own tears.

  Reese came directly to me, pulling me in for a tight hug before moving to Shelly. “You girls are the shit!” she exclaimed after stepping back and wiping her eyes. “Brand says that you probably saved Silo’s life, Shell, by using that pressure maneuver. And Lu! Taking out a VD all on your own? You’ve got balls, honey!”

  My sister colored and firmed her chin. “Yeah, but if I’d known Mel was unconscious out by the garage during it all, I would’ve put another couple of caps in his VD ass without even blinking.” The chuckles from the group brought more than a few stares from the other people in the waiting room and the staff passing by.

  Soon, the numerous Hellions and Honeys made to go, giving me, Lulu and Julie hugs, handshakes or a firm shoulder clasp before leaving. A move that again brought tears to my eyes at their thoughtfulness and concern. Reese had been right. The Hellions did operate as a family—a better family than any I’d ever experienced.

  After the last one left with promises of coming to see Silo when he was allowed visitors, it was just us three girls left and we found a quiet corner to wait in. With little Jules tucked up close to her side, Lulu leaned into me.

  “I’ve been thinking…” she started and then looked around the room almost as if she was gauging who was close enough or had enough interest to be listening to what she was about to say. “About the missing money.”

  I felt my eyebrows raise at both her tone and her choice of subject matter. Especially with all that we’d been through that day.

  “One of the things I remember seeing when I discovered daddy-dearest’s wrongdoings was a large transference of money into an account marked ‘cash’.” Her eyes took on a faraway look as she spoke. “When I asked him about it, he said it was nothing. Nothing for me to worry about. That the money was insurance although against what and for whom he never said.”

  “Is it in another account then, Lu? One that no one knows?”

  She nodded her head and idly stroked Julie’s hair, running her fingers through the little girl’s ponytail. “I think so because the address on it was Martha’s Vineyard.”

  My whole body jerked. “Grandmother Palmer’s old place is on Martha’s Vineyard!”

  Her blue eyes met mine. “Dad said he hated that place. Too old and too rustic for his refined tastes.”

  “And he told me that he was having it refurbished, brought into the 21st century and wouldn’t be available for vacations until late 2014,” I continued, staring at her. Could it be? “Do you think…?”

  She nodded twice. “I’d be willing to bet he had something doing there. Something no one was supposed to find out about.”

  My mind raced. If Shelly was right, it could be the answer to a lot of our problems. “Which one of us should go or should we go together?” My voice was higher, tighter in excitement. To have this over and done with almost made me giddy. But even with my elation at knowing the end was in sight, I knew I’d never go back to Albuquerque, never go back to being the better-than-thou girl I used to be.

  Lulu smiled and I noticed her lipstick had worn off. “Let’s get our men whole and healthy and then we can work it out from there, okay?”

  Oh yeah. Getting our men healthy took precedence over anyone and everything.

  *.*.*.*.*

  Luckily Silo had only been in ICU for a day and a half before he was moved to a ‘regular’ room. Since I was his only family member, I had been the only one to be able to visit with him for five minutes on the hour from nine in the morning until nine at night. But even so, the small waiting area always held at least one Hellion member who I’d give the update to and who would dissimulate the information on Silo’s condition to the other brothers in both Missoula and Billings.

  And all that waiting in between my short visits had given me a lot of time to think. To consider both my future and his. One that I was determined would be combined.

  Coming to a decision hadn’t been all that hard. Not difficult in the least, but to move forward I knew I was going to need help and Reese was my first choice.

  “Absolutely, Shell,” she’d immediately agreed after I’d laid out my plan. “You can count on me.” And my girl, my new best friend, didn’t disappoint.

  Performing the handoff while Silo was getting set up in his new space, I took a moment in the Ladies room to run a wide-toothed comb through my hair and make sure my makeup still looked okay. I couldn’t do anything about the puffy, dark circles underneath my eyes but I considered them a small price to pay in the whole scheme of things.

  Taking a big deep breath, I stared into eyes of the woman in the mirror. “You can do this,” I whispered to her with a head nod and I saw her nod back confidently as she grinned at me.

  I actually heard him before I saw him. Somehow he must have forgotten his volume control because Silo’s roar was very clear as it echoed down the hall towards me. “Well, I’m settled! Where the fuck is she?”

  “Right here, big guy.” My eyes took in his large form that seemed too big for the bed he was in as the nurse brushed by me on her way out. But his color was better and I saw he was only hooked up to an IV and a couple of other machines. “I’m right here, Si’.”

  “Where the fuck have you been, Shell?” The scowl he wore was so deep it looked like it hurt.

  Ignoring his question, I placed a gentle kiss on his forehead while stroking his crown, feeling the little prickles of the hair that had grown out over the couple of days in his hospital stay. “How are you feeling, honey?”

  “Like shit! How do you think I fucking feel?”

  I had to bite my lip and turn away to prevent my smile from being seen. Dragging the visitor chair closer to the bed, I put my purse underneath it before I sat down. “The nurse asked me to tell you to use your indoor voice, Si’. All the roaring is upsetting the other patients.”

  He shot a glare to the door before turning back to me. “As if I give a good goddamn about the other patients!” But it was said at a much lower volume than the one he’d used before.

  I took his hand while I also took in a deep lungful of air. “We need to talk.”

  His eyes, those beautiful changeable eyes, lifted to mine. “We do?”

  “Yeah, Si’.” Whoa, this was scary and I could feel my palm resting in his begin to sweat. “Now that everything’s over, I can finally get on with my life.”

  His eyebrows immediately pinched together and his mouth firmed at my words. “What the fuck does that mean?”

  I took another breath and dropped my eyes to where our fingers were entwined on the blanket. “It means…

  “Diddly squat! That’s what it means, Shell!” Whoops! We were back to loud. “Just because a few of those bastards are dead or in jail doesn’t mean they don’t have other members searching for you!”

  He could’ve had a point, but with Lulu’s idea about where the missing money might be, I was certain the end of our running days would soon be behind us.

  “Silo. Honey, I’ve been in limbo for a while and have been living off you the entire time.” I gazed into his eyes and saw they hadn’t changed to bluey-gray as I’d hoped but were still in the stormy category. “I need to start taking the reins for my own life.”

  His face looked stricken at what I’d said and I watched his Adam’s apple move as he swallowed thickly. “I don’t want you to leave me, baby.”

>   There it was.

  Said straight up and plainly, Silo had given voice to what I had finally admitted to myself. But before I could declare anything myself, we needed to get a few things straight.

  “I don’t see why not,” I countered, settling my face into a frown. I only hoped it didn’t look as phony as it felt. “We fight all the damn time!”

  “We don’t fight, princess,” he shot back. “We just…have loud discussions.”

  “You’re a control freak, always telling me what to do and when to do it!” I waited to hear him debate that point.

  “Only because you push, Shell. You push at me all the fucking time!”

  “You’re a no-frills man and I’m a frilly girl, Si’.” Which was the nicest way for me to tell him he was a miser and I liked to spend.

  “I like your kind of frills, baby, even if they are expensive as fuck!”

  “They are not!”

  “They goddamn are! You even had me spending five bucks on a pint of fucking ice cream. Five fucking bucks, Shell!”

  “So why do you want me to stay if I’m so damn expensive!” Ooh, we were getting there, getting so close to the place I needed us to be.

  “Because I fucking love you!” If I’d thought his voice had been loud before, it didn’t hold a candle to his volume at that moment.

  Matching his sound decibel for decibel, I got closer to his face by leaning over the mattress. “And I fucking love you too!

  He gave a deep, hard blink so I pressed on albeit on the quieter side.

  “And I think after all that we’ve freaking been through, all that you’ve put me through, it’s time we made it legal!”

  “What?” he whispered, his eyes finally, flipping finally, showing some blue that I thought was mostly due to shock.

  “You heard me. I want you to marry me, Silo.” I reached underneath my chair and dug in my bag for the little box Reese had pressed into my hand earlier. Pulling it out, I flipped open the lid and turned it towards my man. “Will you marry me, Silas Kettering?”

  His eyes went down to the gray titanium band with the diamond chip and cable band decoration before coming back to my face. “What the fuck is this?”

  “Your engagement ring, big guy.”

  “Dudes don’t wear engagement rings, Shell. You got it backwards. It’s the chick that wears one.”

  “In the regular world, I’d agree. But you’re a Hellion, Si’. And bikers can do whatever they want, right?” My heart was booming as I waited for his answer, not really sure what it might be.

  “Damn straight,” he agreed with a chin jut, staring at the ring I still held out to him.

  I waited a couple of beats giving him time to think. But it wasn’t long before I couldn’t take the silence and blurted, “Well? Aren’t you going to answer me?”

  “Thought I already fucking did!”

  “When? All you said was ‘damn straight’!” My voice, in my pique at not receiving an immediate affirmative answer, sounded strained.

  “And that was my fucking answer! Fuck, Shell. Get with the goddamn program, all right?”

  It was my turn to blink hard. “And is ‘damn straight’ biker-speak for ‘yes’?”

  “Yep.”

  “Yep as in it means yes or yep as in…” but I didn’t get a chance to finish because he’d snagged the back of my neck and forced my face up to his.

  “Think it’s time for you to fucking shut it, pretty girl,” he murmured before his lips touched mine. But he continued when we came up for air more than a few minutes later. “Yes, I’ll marry you. And yeah, I’ll wear the fucking ring but only because it’s cool as fuck. But I ain’t taking your last name though. Not even fucking hyphening it.”

  “That’s okay, honey,” I assured him as I stayed in contact with his mouth. “The Palmer name is shit anyway.”

  “It ain’t the name that makes a person, baby.” His voice, that deep, deep voice that reminded me of the pipes on the machine he rode, was now soft.

  And I couldn’t disagree.

  Not at all.

  Chapter Twenty Seven

  (Three months later)

  “…and it’s almost five o’clock, Si’,” Shelly called from deep in the bowels of the newly renovated kitchen. He turned his head against the back of the sectional and watched her as she came into the room, smiling as their eyes caught and held. “You need to get ready, big guy.”

  “For fucking what? It’s just another damn bar-b-que.” He snagged the remote from the cushion next to him and turned off the TV determining his grandparents had been right. Having a TV really did suck the life right out of you because he’d been watching it for over an hour but couldn’t have told you what the hell he’d watched. “Was planning on fucking wearing what I’ve got on!”

  “No,” she drawled, coming and plopping her beautiful butt down on the cushion next to him. “It’s not. It’s a dinner party at Brand and Reese’s. Just because they’re grilling doesn’t mean it’s a Hellion bar-b-que.”

  He shook his head but draped an arm around his girl, feeling her snuggle against him. “Shell, will there be Hellions and Honeys there?”

  She turned her face up to his and nodded.

  “And will there be the fucking cooking of meat over an open fucking fire?”

  “I guess, but that doesn’t…”

  “Then it’s a fucking Hellion bar-b-que!” he roared in triumph.

  “Are you gonna argue with me over everything? Because if you are, the next several months are going to be hard on us both, honey.” Her tone said ‘pissy’ but her smile took some of the heat out of her words. “Really hard.”

  Her hand went to her belly and made a small circle, bringing a softness to his heart and a weakness to his knees.

  Fuck! You could’ve bowled him over with a feather when she woke him up that morning, wailing and waving some kind of white stick in his face. A little fucking white plastic wand that smelled of pee but that held a plus sign on it. By the time he was fully conscious and tracking, his brain had put two and two together since her sobbing explanation hadn’t made a lick of fucking sense.

  But he’d gotten it, finally understood what she’d been trying to tell him.

  He was gonna be a daddy.

  Him. Silo Kettering, Hellion brother and council member, manager of Hellion Construction Plumbing Division and husband to Michelle Kettering was going to be a father.

  A thought that was both exciting and too fucking scary to be believed.

  “Ah, Shell,” he crooned, pulling her in tighter and dropping a kiss on her forehead. “I think we’re back to so fucking good, it should be illegal.”

  He heard her sigh. “Yeah, we are, Si’. Although finding that money in Massachusetts helped.”

  And he couldn’t deny it.

  After their civil ceremony at the county courthouse that included just Lulu and Hardwood, Brand and Reese as well as the huge Hellion reception at the new Billing compound, it had taken them fucking hours to get to New Bedford where he’d popped for the honeymoon suite at one of the luxury hotels. And although it had cost a fucking whack, he hadn’t regretted it in the least. Not after viewing his beautiful woman, his amazing fucking wife, spread out naked—warm, open and willing in the middle of the king-size bed in the opulent room.

  Getting to the island where her grandmother’s house was located in the middle of winter hadn’t been near as hard as he’d imagined when Shelly had explained her and Lulu’s theory about the missing money. Although it had been cold as fuck both outside the old house as well as inside where everything had been covered in sheets and dust covers. But, they’d found it. Found the stacks and stacks of cash located in what Shelly had called her grandma’s old root cellar.

  And once found, he’d placed the call to Brand as prearranged. According to the Hellion president, all Silo and Shelly had to do was make sure it was there and he’d take care of the rest. When pressed, Brand had admitted that he knew someone that would get the info to
the Milosevics and that the newlyweds didn’t have to do anything else. That it would all be taken care of without any additional help needed and without disturbing either the house or any of the year round residents.

  Which was more than fine with Silo. Just as it had been when both Shelly and Lulu respectfully declined the ‘finder’s fee’ from an unnamed source over the recovery of the money.

  In fact, when he thought of it, the big, bald biker considered everything in his life to be good, bordering on great.

  Complete in some fucking way that he didn’t want to define but just accept.

  He shifted and felt the pull of the scars on his side, only then remembering to ask his bride about Hardwood and Lu, who’d found their own place and had moved out while the new Kettering family had been on their honeymoon. It had been Brand and Pagan that had pulled the various crews together to get their bullet riddled house back into some kind of livable shape. “What’d the doc say about Hardwood?”

  “Gave him a clean bill of health,” Shelly murmured rubbing a cheek against his chest. “I guess they’re getting back to good too.”

  Poor Hardwood had gone through a lot worse than Silo had, at least in the older biker’s mind. Debilitating headaches and double vision had plagued the brother for more than a couple of months after his concussion and had Lulu fucking scared half to death. Although no one knew how the man had sustained his injury in the ensuing firefight.

  Silo patted his wife’s back as a signal to move and made to stand.

  “Where’re you going, big guy?”

  “To change my fucking shirt, baby. Ain’t that what you damn-well asked me to do?” He glanced over his shoulder, his eyes taking in her gleaming curls and soft, frosted blue eyes that seemed to be admiring his ass.

  “Without any further argument?”

  “Yeah, princess. And take fucking notes because I’m expecting it to be fucking reciprocated,” he advised with a quirked grin.

  She rolled her eyes before murmuring, “in your freaking dreams.”

  He continued on his way down the newly re-plastered hall doing some murmuring of his own. “Yeah, baby. Because I’m living it. Living my fucking dream.”