The Forgiven Duke (A Forgotten Castles Novel)

by Carie, Jamie

  It was an instant challenge. She came to the doorway where a liveried footman bowed and murmured something she tried not to hear. The music . . . the dancers . . . the roaring crowd—she stood on the threshold of the glittering ballroom and tried to block them out, seeing only the whirling bodies and straining instruments, the laughing faces and swaying bodies.

  Oh, dear God, it’s so horrible. How does he do it?

  She was breathing too fast, seeing it as he did. And then a stern voice crashed into her imaginary world.

  “Where have you been?”

  She turned to find Gabriel, dressed in immaculate evening wear of black and white, frowning down at her.

  “I . . . I lost track of time.”

  He took in her dress with an appreciative glance. “Never mind. You look beautiful.” He raised a brow and gestured to the watching crowd. “They are eager for an introduction. Shall we?”

  She took a deep breath and nodded. With him by her side she would make it through the night.

  He took her to one group and then another, introducing her, keeping her on his arm, watching her speak to them, noticing the moment she was bored or adrift and then whisking her into another crowd. A sea of faces and names, a few she knew but many she did not. How was she to keep them all straight? And so many men, young and old and in between, looking at her with speculation, interest, and even a few with a feverish besotted look in their eyes.

  As she’d been told countless times, with her rich fortune and pretty face the offers would not take long to come in. Already she’d had one young man hint at a proposal and three others ask to call on her the next day. An older gentleman, though quite distinguished and handsome, even asked if she would care to ride later in the week. She’d not known what to say and looked to Gabriel for help answering. He seemed to be growing more and more impatient and angry, looking red and flushed and barking out comments to any man caught talking to her.

  She felt him strain to understand, sometimes at sea as well in the conversation, sometimes keeping up. She found herself helping, turning toward his face with clues on her face or lips or moving her arm in a subtle way that said they should move to another group in the crowd. She couldn’t tell if the night was going well or not.

  The dancing was as bad. Gabriel glowered at them when she danced with anyone other than him, which was several times. She found herself acting too tired and out of breath to avoid making him so angry even though she loved to dance. Anyway, when she did dance, she couldn’t really concentrate on what her partner said. Her mind, and gaze, wandered to where Gabriel was standing, who he was speaking to, and how he was faring. One gentleman called her out on it.

  “I see that your heart has already chosen, mademoiselle.”

  Her gaze shot up to meet the dark brown eyes of Count Fallourd from Paris. “Whatever do you mean, my lord?” She must appear cold and uncaring, but she couldn’t seem to help it.

  He gave her a slow smile and dramatic sigh, his gaze darted to Gabriel and then back at her. “It is convenient at least, no?”

  She felt her cheeks warm. Were her feelings so obvious?

  By the time the midnight supper was to be served, she was exhausted. Gabriel came over to her, she thought, to escort her into dinner. She turned and shook her head at him. “How do you do it? It’s so tiring.” She looked up into those piercing green eyes. “I see your world . . . a little.”

  He leaned down and spoke to her, his warm breath with a smile in it in her ear. “I have grown accustomed to it, I suppose. You are not enjoying yourself?”

  “I am when I’m with you.” The words slipped out before she had time to wonder if she should say it.

  Happiness lit his eyes, making her glad she had spoken them.

  “I have a surprise before supper that might, I hope, make you very happy.” He looked at her in such a way that the crowd disappeared and it felt like just the two of them stood in the ballroom. He took her hand and placed it in the crook of his arm, leading her onto the middle of the dance floor.

  The crowd parted as they made their way to the center. There was no music; it had stopped the moment the musicians sensed their host had something special in mind. He could command them all so easily, his very presence commanded a crowd with a flick of his wrist and a simple nod. What was he up to? Her heartbeat quickened as the crowd grew still and quiet.

  He took her into his arms, nodding to the orchestra, as they all watched. Her jaw flexed in determination, nervous for him that he start in time, but he knew just when the music began. The song was unknown and yet . . . strangely familiar. Alex smiled up at him as she realized it was the song he had played for her that day in the blue drawing room. He had played so beautifully, so passionately. It was the loveliest song she’d ever heard. They swirled around the space the guests made, watching them. Like the time at the masquerade, it was as if they had stepped into their own private world of oneness with the music and with each other.

  He leaned down and whispered into her ear, “Do you trust me, Alexandria?”

  She narrowed her eyes in curiosity and some hesitation. What was he up to? But she nodded that she did.

  At the end, he leaned her back into a sweeping move that surprised her. She hung suspended by his arm, having to trust him. Her body was in his control and it was frightening and thrilling at the same time. He pulled her up toward his face and she gulped in air, biting her bottom lip and staring into those deep green eyes.

  They were making a spectacle of themselves. She laughed. In his arms. In front of everyone. Not caring what anyone thought. Just happy to be with him.

  He set her away from him and then did the most astonishing thing. He knelt, on one knee, in front of her and everyone. Alex gasped along with the crowd. He pulled something from his pocket. The crowd hushed as he held the sparkling object toward her. With a deep and confident voice, he asked, “Alexandria Elise Featherstone, will you be my wife?”

  Her eyes widened. She stared at the glittering ring. Dare she? It was all she wanted and yet there was still so much between them, things he didn’t know, things she didn’t know how to tell him. But she loved him. She wanted him, for her whole life, to be hers and she, his. What should she do?

  The silence lengthened as she stared at the ring. The crowd began to murmur.

  “Alexandria?” His green gaze impaled her, questioning and delving into her very soul. Oh! Why had he done it here? Now? When she couldn’t explain and he couldn’t take it back if he learned the truth about her and changed his mind. What should she do? Dear God, what shall I do?

  She felt a nauseous wave of gut-wrenching sickness like she’d never felt before. The room started to buzz and swell around her.

  “Alexandria!” Gabriel stood and clasped her around the waist just as she let out a breath and collapsed.

  THE ROOM WENT WILD WITH speculation. Gabriel saw their eyes—greedy, gossipy, shock, some sad for him but many gloating as he scooped her up and carried her, shouting orders to his staff and hurrying from the ballroom.

  “Bring smelling salts, water, to the blue salon.”

  He took her to their private place as he now thought of it and laid her on the brocade settee. She was so pale. It made his heart race. Why hadn’t she said yes? He was sure she loved him. He placed his ear against her chest and felt for the thud, thud, thud of her heart, then leaned into her face.

  “Come back to me, my sweet. Alexandria, wake up.”

  The servants entered with the smelling salts. Gabriel placed them under her nose and called her name. After a few moments her eyelids fluttered open and those sky blue eyes roved over the ceiling. She turned her head and looked at him, her cheeks flushed. “Oh dear. I fainted, didn’t I? In front of everyone.”

  And rejected me, in front of everyone.

  She slowly sat up and arranged her skirts wit
h nervous hands. “I–I–” She looked up at him and swallowed hard. “I was just so shocked. I’ve ruined everything, haven’t I?”

  He wasn’t sure what she said and it made him angry. Turning from her, he found a speaking book and writing implements and brought them to her.

  He held them out to her. “Do you love me, Alexandria?”

  She looked at the paper, then up at him, bit her lower lip, and nodded.

  “You were just shocked then? Tell me.”

  She took the book and set it in her lap, dipped the quill in the ink pot he held, and poised it over the paper. Tense and sickly white, she just kept looking at the blank page. Why wouldn’t she tell him whatever this was about? Gabriel sat beside her and took her face gently into his hands. He turned her toward him and began to speak.

  “Alexandria, listen to me. I have it all planned. I was going to tell you on our wedding day, as a gift to you, but perhaps you need to hear it now. We have had word that weeks ago someone spotted your parents. The regent and I think you are right. We believe your parents are still alive.”

  He didn’t mention the regent’s letter. He didn’t tell her they had been captured and might not, indeed, be alive. He needed her hope. There was no reason to worry her beyond giving her that hope.

  Her eyes widened. “Where are they?”

  “In Italy.”

  “Italy?”

  “Yes. The regent has already sent the very best investigators to find them. He has ordered me to keep you here and not to tell you, but I know how important it is for you to find them yourself. I wanted to give you that chance.”

  “But how?” She looked close to tears.

  “My dearest Alexandria, do you know where the bride and groom go after a wedding?”

  She shook her head.

  “On a honeymoon trip. It would be expected that we leave the country, and after a brief visit in France to throw off anyone who might be watching us, we’ll end up in one of the most beautiful places in the world.” He gripped her hands. “Florence.”

  She nodded and then leaned forward and wrapped her arms around his neck, clinging to him. “Yes,” she said into his neck, kissing him. “Yes.” She clung to him, saying it with her whole body. “I will be your wife.”

  His heart soared with happiness. He hadn’t bribed her. Of course not. She was about to say yes anyway. Of course she would be his wife. He’d been subconsciously planning it since her first letter. He’d been conscious of it since the masquerade. And she’d accepted him, loved him despite everything that had happened to him in the last year. He shoved the thoughts aside and kissed her more deeply, losing them both in the world of touch.

  They would be happy together.

  He would make sure of it.

  Chapter Thirty-Three

  She wasn’t pregnant.

  The banns had been read. The white dress trimmed in pearls and aquamarine stones, the color of her eyes, lay perfect in every way on the bed ready to slip into. The church overflowed with thousands of waiting guests, and the streets surrounding it thronged with Londoners eager to get a peek of the Duke of St. Easton’s bride. And thanks be to God, she wasn’t pregnant.

  Alexandria Featherstone stared at her family crest on the stationery from home that said Ann and Henry couldn’t make the journey and represent her only family for the biggest event in her life. Her thumb brushed across the wax seal, reading the Featherstone motto on the banner over the lion and eagle’s heads:

  Valens et Volens—“Willing and Able.”

  Was she?

  Clarissa, the maid assigned to her since coming to Gabriel’s household, burst through the door. Alex had always been thankful that Clarissa wasn’t the shy sort who held Alex in any kind of esteem. No, she was the chatty, gossipy friend sort who had helped Alexandria navigate the household and instructed her about the duties of a duchess. And today was no different.

  “Gracious me! Look at the time, my lady. We have to get you dressed and into the carriage within the hour.” When Alex didn’t move, she glowered at her and shook her head. “Come now, no time for bride’s nerves. Bless the saints, at least we have your hair done. Come, come.”

  Alex let her chatter wash over her and calm her nerves. She had had her woman’s time two weeks ago, days after her engagement became official. The relief had left her reeling with both happiness and shock. And even though that news had been welcome, she had felt a surprising stab of sadness that John would die without legacy. She could have given him that, at least. Still, she was terrified of her wedding night. What would Gabriel discover? Would he be horrified if he found out she was no virgin and hadn’t told him? Any normal man might be.

  She took a shaky breath and turned as her maid directed. There was no backing out of it now. She loved Gabriel. He loved her, as he’d told her several times over the last three weeks during which the reading of the banns occurred. They would work through it together. She would tell him, just not yet. Not today! She couldn’t ruin their wedding day. But something kept whispering to her that this was the only day left. The last day he could change his mind.

  She had been trying to get up the nerve to tell him every day since agreeing to marry him, but she froze every time she thought of it. She just couldn’t seem to get the words out of her mouth. And now, she couldn’t stop thinking about what would happen on her wedding night. He would discover the truth on his own, wouldn’t he?

  She stepped into the white gown and stood rigidly as Clarissa buttoned the row of pearl buttons. “Now, there isn’t any reason to be so nervous, my lady. Why, the duke is happier than we’ve ever seen him. He left for the church an hour ago with that handsome friend of his, Lord Albert Bartrom. Why, his lordship and the duke were joking and laughing and having a right good time all the way into the carriage, both of ’em looking so dapper in their uniforms.”

  She turned Alex and began straightening the folds of the sleeves and the skirt. “And the dowager duchess is all smiles.” Her voice lowered in a grumble. “And we know how often that occurs, almost never.” Her voice brightened again. “Lady Jane is teary eyed, happy tears, you know, and so pretty in her pink dress as your attendant. They wanted to come up, but I said to give us a minute to get you in all your glory and they’ve listened for once. Mr. Meade keeps talking about that time you shot him.” Clarissa leaned back and eyed Alexandria with laughing hazel eyes, her brown curls bobbing on the sides of her cap. “I still can’t fathom your sweet self shooting anyone.”

  “It was an accident,” Alex interrupted.

  “Yes, well he’s taking credit for endearing you to us. And the duke’s other sisters are said to be at the church already. Have you heard about the crowds? Why all of London has turned out in the streets, and we don’t know how we’re going to get you to the church on time.”

  Alex had heard about the crowds and it only made her more nervous. A sudden knock at the door gave her a jump.

  “There now, that’ll be the dowager and Lady Jane.” Clarissa rushed to the door and flung it wide. True to her words, Gabriel’s mother and sister came inside.

  “Oh, Alexandria. You look so beautiful! Doesn’t she, Mother?”

  “She does.” The dowager, having softened toward the idea of their marriage in the last three weeks, saying she was glad her son had finally found someone and could get to the business of producing an heir, looked as misty eyed as Jane.

  Jane came forward and took Alex’s hands. “I’m sorry your parents couldn’t be here to see you, Alexandria. You must miss them terribly today.”

  Alex nodded and bit down on her lower lip with sudden tears in her eyes at the thought of it.

  “Good heavens, Jane. Don’t bring that up,” Her Grace admonished.

  “Oh, I’m sorry.” Jane squeezed her hands and then backed up. “We’ve brought you something borrowed and som
ething blue.” She held out two wrapped packages.

  Alex smiled, telling Jane with her eyes that she wasn’t upset at her for the comment. “That was so kind.” She sat in one of her bedchamber chairs and unwrapped the first gift. Inside, on a bed of white velvet, lay two teardrop-shaped earrings with large, blue topaz stones and diamonds surrounding them. Alex could only stare at them for a long moment. “They are amazing.”

  Jane nodded happily. “They match your eyes and the gems sewn into the dress.” Jane handed her the second package.

  Her Grace lifted her chin and spoke with pride. “This has belonged to the Duchesses of St. Easton for over two centuries. Until you are pronounced husband and wife, it is still mine and can be your item borrowed. After today, you will be the Duchess of St. Easton and it will belong to you until your firstborn son marries when you will give it to his wife.”

  I am about to become the Duchess of St. Easton.

  For the first time the impact of what that meant struck her. Her stomach quivered as she took the small package and carefully unwrapped it. There, in a pile of tissue paper, lay the most delicate tiara she’d ever seen. Small and dainty but with hundreds of diamonds mounted on what looked like spun silver. “I can’t,” Alex said. Just the thought of picking it up made her nervous. What if it snapped in half?

  “You must,” the dowager insisted. “Let me.” She came and took the piece in her gloved hands. There were tiny combs along the edge that she slipped into Alex’s hair with practiced ease.

  “Alexandria, it’s perfect. Come see.” Jane took her hand and led her to the mirror.

  Alex looked at her reflection, shock and joy and terror warring within her. Was she really about to get married?

  They heard bells from afar. “The church bells!” Jane shrieked, eyes bright with panic and laughter.

  “Saints preserve us!” Clarissa clapped her hands as if leader of an army. “We have to get her to the church!” They all laughed, Gabriel’s mother even cracking a smile.