[Clearing the Ice 01.0] This Piece of My Heart

by Robyn M Ryan

  “That’s four.” Caryn’s eyes sparkled as she teased him. “All of those sound wonderful… and incredibly romantic. Don’t you have a first choice?”

  “Well, when you knocked off the Grand Canyon, I had to improvise. We can look online when we get home, then you make the decision.” He gently fingered the collar of her shirt, lightly running his hand against her skin. “Do you realize where we are?”

  Caryn laughed. “Last I checked we were in Toronto, on the university campus.”

  “You sure? Take a look around.” He gently turned her away from him. “Recognize anything?”

  Caryn frowned, not sure what he wanted her to see, then suddenly the memory burst to the surface and she nodded enthusiastically. “This is exactly where we met, literally. I can still see…” She turned to face him, the words forgotten. Andrew had dropped to a knee, and his blue eyes grabbed hers with an intensity Caryn could not resist.

  He took her hand. “I love you, Caryn. I want to be with you for eternity, raise a family with you, and grow older together. Will you make me the happiest and luckiest guy in the universe and marry me?” He had a blue Tiffany box in his hand, and opened it as Caryn stared at him, her eyes flooding with tears.

  Her hand flew to her mouth. “Yes, yes, yes!” She thought she might be shouting, as she pulled him to his feet and threw herself into his arms. “Yes, of course I’ll marry you! I love you. Yes, yes, yes!”

  Their lips met and she expressed her joy in a different way. Vaguely she was aware of the sound of clapping, followed by whistles and catcalls. Reluctantly, they ended the kiss and looked around to see that a small crowd had gathered, congratulating them boisterously.

  Caryn felt her cheeks flushing as one student called out, “Way to go, man! Classic.”

  “Here, give me your phone, I’ll take your picture,” a girl offered as she walked toward them. Caryn fumbled in her pocket, but Andrew handed over his iPhone. She took a few photos, then handed the phone back. Another approached.

  “I actually caught the moment on my phone. I saw you go to a knee and just knew. I can email it to you.”

  Caryn gave her email address, and then looked at Andrew. “That’s correct, isn’t it? I can hardly think.”

  “Yes.” Andrew laughed, then he held Caryn’s left hand and slipped the ring on her finger. “If you don’t like it, we can exchange for another design.”

  Caryn looked at the blue eyes that still made her knees weak, even through the blur of tears. She shook her head unable to speak, then pressed her face against his chest. When his arms closed around her, she felt like a Disney princess. She shut her eyes and vowed to treasure this moment forever.

  ***

  Caryn snuggled next to Andrew on the sofa, holding her left hand out, watching as the brilliant diamonds sparkled in the lamplight. “Pinch me, Drew. Am I dreaming?”

  He gently reached for her hand and folded his hand around it. “No dreams, Cary. You can’t ‘wake up’ and change your mind.”

  She laughed softly. “I’m absolutely not changing my mind. And neither can you.”

  “Wouldn’t think of it.”

  She sat up so she could see his face. “Have I told you how happy I am?”

  “Only about a thousand times.” His blue eyes captured hers. “When you said, ‘yes,’ I thought I was the one dreaming.”

  “You ever had any doubts?”

  Andrew shrugged. “You could have said no.”

  She leaned back against his shoulder. “Extremely unlikely.”

  “Are you absolutely sure you like the ring?”

  She looked him directly in the eyes. “If you ask me that again…” she began. “The ring is perfect, Drew. I’d have been happy with a pop-top.”

  “That could be arranged.” He pressed his lips against her forehead. “Plan the wedding of your dreams, Cary. Make it everything you always wanted.”

  “We could elope.”

  “We could,” Andrew agreed, “but that’s not your perfect wedding. I want the whole world to know I’m marrying the most amazing woman who’s made me happier than I ever deserve.” He paused, then added, “If we elope, you’ll never hear the end of it from Lauren.”

  “I don’t even want to imagine that!” Caryn couldn’t contain her laughter. “I’m really not sure about my dream wedding.”

  “Take your time. There’s no hurry.”

  “You thinking next summer?”

  “After you graduate—we can have a summer-long celebration.”

  Caryn sat up again and touched his cheek. “I don’t have to graduate.” She smiled at his quizzical expression. “If we elope or have a really small ceremony, I could go back to St. Louis with you. Maybe enroll in a university there.”

  “You’ve worked so hard to get that degree, Cary. You’ve overcome so many obstacles—statistical analysis the least of those. Don’t you think you’d regret not finishing? Just two more semesters.”

  “I could check universities in St. Louis,” she persisted.

  “You could. You could see if your credits would transfer. It’s your decision. Can’t say that thought has not occurred to me…but just remember, there’s no guarantee I’ll be in St. Louis the entire season.”

  Caryn’s face mirrored her disappointment. “Do you have to be so practical?”

  He pulled her into his arms and kissed the disappointment aside. “You’ve always said you wanted to know you can take care of yourself. Don’t you want to use what you’ve learned? I can already see the difference since you’ve taken control of my ‘digital image,’ as you term it.”

  “I don’t want to work for a bank, that’s for sure.” She laughed as she made a face. “I was thinking about maybe starting my own business. There must be other people or small businesses that need some guidance.”

  “I can probably find enough guys to refer—you’ll end up hiring your own interns.” His fingers traced her lips. “There’s a bottle of champagne chilling in the kitchen. Shall we begin our own celebration?” He kissed her gently. “Or would you rather start calling families and friends?”

  Caryn closed her arms around his neck and continued the kiss. “Tonight—just you and me,” she whispered. “Our own private celebration. Everyone else can just wait.”

  ***

  Caryn was too excited to sleep and her mind hopped from weddings to honeymoons to reliving the most romantic proposal she could have ever imagined. She slipped out of bed twice to go into the darkened bathroom so she could look at the photos the students had taken…and to admire her engagement ring. She tried not to toss and turn, hoping she would not awaken Andrew. Finally moving her pillow close to his, she slid her arm around his chest.

  Mrs. Caryn Chadwick…Mrs. Caryn Avril Chadwick…Ms. Caryn Chadwick…Mrs. Andrew Chadwick…Definitely no hyphenated Stevens-Chadwick. She could finally shed the weight and expectations intertwined with that name. She played with the names as she ran through them over and over again.

  How would her parents react? Maybe she’d just send them a postcard from the honeymoon or post a photo on Facebook. Her dad would hear about that probably in less than an hour. She would post the photos for her select Facebook friends to view—and change her relationship status. Engaged to the man I love more than I could ever express.

  Despite herself, Caryn thought of her mother’s exquisite wedding gown. How she’d dreamed of wearing it one day! She often begged her mother to show it to her; even tried it on when she was sixteen. She almost laughed out loud as she remembered her father’s face when she walked into the study wearing it, her mother quietly following her. She’d always assumed she would marry in the same church as her parents did in Montréal, the celebration a delightful mixture of French and English cultures. When did she last see her grandparents, aunts, uncles, or cousins—in Montréal or Ottawa? Of course—she’d missed the annual Christmas family gatherings last year.

  She suddenly regretting not calling her grandparents or taking Andrew to meet them. He
r mom’s parents in Montréal would adore him—her grandmother would charm him with her smile and refusal to speak English; her grandfather, the rabid Habs fan, would talk hockey for hours. Her dad’s parents would love if they visited them in the small house they refused to sell, although her dad constantly offered to buy something closer and easier to maintain. Stubborn, just like her father. Because her parents had cut her loose didn’t mean her grandparents had ceased loving her. Shame from selfishness and neglect washed through her. She would rectify this first thing in the morning.

  She didn’t think she’d fallen asleep, but suddenly the sun was streaming through the windows, and Andrew was kissing her cheek.

  “Morning, sunshine,” he said softly. “Or should I say afternoon?”

  Caryn smiled as she sat up brushing her hair away from her face. “I didn’t think I’d fall asleep.” She suddenly looked at her hand. The ring still sparkled. “I was afraid I had dreamed everything!”

  Andrew sat on the bed beside her. “Not a chance—though you made part one of my dream a reality.” At her quizzical expression, he held up her hand. “You did say yes, I believe.”

  “I believe I did.” She reached to place her palm against his cheek. “I love you, Drew. I was so excited last night I couldn’t sleep.”

  “Really? I never would have guessed. What were you doing when you were walking around in the dark?”

  Caryn flushed. “I didn’t want to wake you, so I went in the bathroom to look at the photos and my ring. I’m sorry I woke you.”

  “Not your fault. I have an inner sensor that obviously knows when you’re not in bed with me.” His voice teased her. “Show me the pictures again.”

  Caryn reached for her phone, scrolled to the photos, smiling when she saw the moment Andrew proposed and handed the phone to him. “I can’t believe someone took this picture!”

  “Quick thinking and very thoughtful.” He glanced at her. “What do you think about posting this on my Facebook page or Twitter?”

  “Depends how much attention you want. You’re going to break thousands of hearts, you know.” Caryn tried to keep a straight face. “Though, I have the perfect caption—Off. The. Market.”

  Andrew chuckled. “I was thinking something like “Happiest guy in the world—she said ‘yes.’…”

  “…And she says, ‘hands off, girls.’” Caryn finished.

  “Okay, we can negotiate that later. I picked up some lunch after I worked out.” He leaned to kiss her. “I’ll get everything set up while you’re dressing.”

  THIRTY-EIGHT

  During lunch, they discussed sharing their news with family and friends. “If you don’t mind, I’d like for us to see my folks and tell them in person,” Andrew said.

  “Of course—they should be the first to know!”

  “What do you think about calling or going to see your parents?” He carefully kept his voice neutral.

  “Talk about raining on my parade.”

  “You really think so?”

  Caryn took a bite of her sandwich as she shrugged.

  “Even your mom?”

  “I don’t know, Drew. There’s been no contact since last fall, unless you count that call to warn me about the texts I’d be receiving. Maybe they’ve just gone on with their lives and what I do doesn’t matter.”

  “I guess you could think of it as a courtesy call—or maybe just text or email—so they don’t hear about it second hand.”

  “I’ll think about it.” Caryn stood to clear the table, taking a deep breath to quell the sudden rush of emotion. “I should have taken you to meet my grandparents a long time ago. They’ll love you. I can’t believe I’ve been so out of touch with them. It’s so selfish of me. They will be happy for us.”

  “We can do that, definitely. Where do they live?”

  “My mom’s parents are in Montréal. How’s your French?”

  “Good enough to communicate—on a basic level. Your grandparents don’t speak English?”

  “My grandfather does, but my grandmother won’t—and she’s never going to change. She understands English perfectly, and if a conversation shifts from French to English, she’ll just continue in French. Just flash those blue eyes at her and she’ll adore you.”

  “Spunky, like you.” Andrew suppressed a smile as he helped her package the leftovers. “I’d enjoy a trip to Montréal.”

  “Good thing you’re no longer with the Leafs. My grandfather is a Canadiens fan to his core. He’ll keep you talking hockey for hours.”

  “That will be my pleasure. What about your father’s parents?”

  Caryn laughed as childhood memories flashed through her mind. “They’re fun. They live in as rural an area as they can outside Ottawa in the same home they built when they got married. My dad grew up there. They have a good bit of land and refuse to move, even though Dad keeps enticing them with luxury condos or homes closer to them. When I was a kid, I called their house ‘going to the farm’…I think you’ll like them and I know they’ll love you. I realized when I wasn’t sleeping last night that we’ve lived in our own little world this past year, and I love it. But now we need to include our families. I want to know your grandparents, aunts, uncles, cousins.”

  “Be careful what you ask for.” Andrew leaned against the counter. “I agree. So, how do you want to handle this?”

  Caryn didn’t speak for several minutes and Andrew guessed the thoughts running through her mind. He reached for a bottle of water to drink and pulled his phone from his pocket to quickly check his emails.

  “I guess I can call my mom,” she finally said. “A part of me wants to tell her and the other part fears getting devastated again.” Andrew slipped his arm around her and pulled her close. His blue eyes captured hers and held her gaze.

  “Cary, it’s completely up to you. If you don’t want to contact them, don’t. Just do what feels right to you.”

  She shrugged, her eyes still locked with his. “I should give my mom the benefit of the doubt. Once I tell my grandparents, they’ll hear anyway and I don’t want anything to be awkward for my grandparents. I doubt they even know what happened.” She leaned her face against his chest. “Can we tell your parents first, and Tom?”

  “Of course. You know they’ll be thrilled.”

  “That’s why I want to go see them first.” She pulled back and smiled at him. “Give me a happiness reserve to get me through my call.”

  ***

  As expected, Andrew’s parents and brother welcomed Caryn to the family enthusiastically, his dad telling Andrew, “It’s about time.” His mom asked permission to organize a family celebration to introduce Caryn to the rest of the Chadwick clan.

  “I imagine your mother is over the moon,” Jean Chadwick told Caryn. “We’re looking forward to meeting your parents.”

  “You’re the first we’ve told,” Andrew answered for her. “We haven’t decided if we’ll call or drive up to Ottawa.”

  Jean hugged Caryn tightly. “You have made us all so happy. Now, I’ll have a daughter…and you’ll help even the odds around here.”

  “Oh, I think you two are more than a match for us guys,” Tom said. And I’ll have a little sister to torment.”

  “I told you I wished for a big brother growing up. I have high expectations for you, Tom.” Caryn tried to keep her face neutral, but when Andrew nudged her, she burst into laughter. “I’m just so happy!”

  “So are we,” Jim Chadwick replied. “Andrew’s a lucky man—be sure to remind him of that periodically.”

  “Go on, you two,” Jean said. “We’ll pick a night we can get together for dinner and you can tell us your plans. Get on with your phone calls!” She looked at Andrew. “You want us to call our parents?”

  “No, I want to. I’ll call aunts and uncles, too and let them spread the news to cousins and so on.”

  “Let us know if we can do anything.” She hugged both of them. “Call when you come up for air.”

  ***

 
Their genuine happiness buoyed Caryn’s mood and fueled anticipation that her mom would react in a similar manner. She poured glasses of lemonade, taking a deep breath as Andrew took a glass from her hand. “Wish me luck,” she said with a small smile.

  “Why don’t you go in the living room to make your calls? I’ll sit on the patio so we won’t be talking over each other.” He kissed her gently. “Holler if you need me, babe.”

  Caryn sat on the chair, remembering the last time she’d seen her mother, sitting on the couch right there, seeking some middle ground to keep her family intact. She flipped through photos on her phone and paused to look at one of her parents taken in happier times. Maybe, just maybe, her mother would react as Jean Chadwick had. She took a deep breath, and then scrolled to her mom’s cell number. Pressing it, she took a deep breath, wondering what kind of message she should leave if her mom didn’t answer.

  She needn’t have worried. The call was answered immediately. “Caryn, is everything all right?”

  “Yes, everything is wonderfully perfect. Andrew proposed to me last night.” She knew everything came out in a tangled rush of words.

  Her mother laughed. “If I understood, you and Andrew are engaged?”

  “Yes, I am so incredibly happy.”

  “Of course you are. Take a breath, calm down and tell me everything.”

  As she recounted the details and significance of Andrew’s choice of locations, Caryn’s apprehensions dissolved, as her mother’s enthusiasm felt sincere.

  “So, do you approve?” she asked.

  “You are marrying the man you love. You don’t need anyone’s approval or permission. I’m truly happy for you, Caryn.”

  “I wanted to tell you and Dad before I called my grandparents.” Caryn paused, then ventured, “What about Dad?”