Old Acquaintances: Christmas Regency Tale (Regency Tales Book 2)
Page 8
Judith shook her head. “I did not know what to do.”
“Judith, why did you not come to me? I would have told you the truth,” said Sir Peregrine quietly.
“What was the truth, Perry?” she asked.
He felt bitterness spark to life, but after an instant he thrust it aside. Pride had once led him to walk away without demanding an explanation. He would not allow himself to make that same mistake again. He must keep his own end of the bargain as well as she had. “Your father approached me to arrange a match between us. I was entirely taken aback by such an arrangement being offered in this day and age. Looking back on it, I think that he must have thought my hesitation due to lack of monetary incentive. That was when he offered that damnable ‘tidy little sum’.”
Sir Peregrine gave a fleeting half-smile as his eyes studied Judith’s tight expression. He continued quietly, “But once I had a moment to think about you, I discovered that your father had merely anticipated my own unformed desires. I had already met you and become intrigued by you. The money that your father spoke about meant nothing to me. I was ready to set it immediately in trust for you to use as you wished. I hoped that you would pass it on to any children that we might have.”
Judith’s expression had altered and become vulnerable as he spoke. The last completely overset her. She covered her face with her hands. “Dear God, how could I have been so wrong?” she whispered.
“Judith.” Sir Peregrine knelt beside her chair and gently pulled her hands down, to hold both clasped between his own fingers. “My very dear Judith, why did you never tell me? We could have saved one another so much anger and bitterness.”
Judith’s smile wavered. “You have said it yourself, Perry. We were not given much time to learn about one another. Whenever we were private, we either fought or you kissed me. I could not keep a single coherent thought in my head.”
A light entered Sir Peregrine’s blue eyes. “That is most interesting, Miss Grantham.” He slowly leaned closer.
Judith watched him come, mesmerized. As his lips brushed hers, her lashes fluttered down. His mouth tasted wonderful and the kiss was heady as wine. The familiar swirl of melting feeling began to engulf her.
Realizing it, Judith broke away. She pulled free her hands and pushed against his broad shoulders. “Perry, do not,” she whispered. For several seconds she was afraid that he would reject her plea. He was still so close that she could feel the warmth of his breath on her face. But then he sighed and eased away from her.
“You are right, Judith. We have still too much that lies between us,” said Sir Peregrine. He rose to his feet and moved deliberately to stand at the mantel so that there was distance between them. “You have said that it was the discovery that your father had offered money to me that decided you against my suit. But I seem to recall quite a different explanation that you gave to me. It sounded a pack of nonsense designed to insult me. But what so deeply enraged me, and what I have carried from that day to this, was your assertion that you feared me.”
Judith sighed and shook her head. “I tried to explain feelings that I did not myself understand. What I did understand was that I was frightened. You see, I did not really know you and what my father said had shaken my faith in what I thought I knew. I was frightened and I had no one to ask for counsel. All my life I had never been able to withstand my father’s will on any occasion, accepting his decisions for my future even when I was caused unhappiness. But my marriage to you-“
She looked at Sir Peregrine somberly. “I would be giving my life into what had become the hands of a complete stranger. I tried to talk to my father, but he paid me not the least heed. He patted me on the head and recommended that I turn my thoughts to my trousseau. My father wished our marriage to take place just as he had planned, but as the date approached my fear of the unknown became stronger than my awe of him. I did not consult with my father before I saw you that day. He was…disappointed.” She could not keep the hurt out of her voice. She had been a frightened young girl sorely in need of support and comfort, but that was not what she had received.
When Sir Peregrine recalled that her father had been a burly gentleman possessed of s supreme confidence in his own opinion, he thought that Judith had surely understated the man’s reaction. All these years he had harbored an erroneous conclusion. His estimation of her mettle had been sadly wanting, he thought. “I know that your father must have made your life very difficult,” he said quietly.
Judith brushed it aside. “It is unimportant now.” She smiled at him wearily. “You must think me a perfect fool, I know.”
Sir Peregrine shook his head. “On the contrary. That is what I thought then, but now I can only salute your courage. You flew in the face of all that you were taught to revere in order to preserve your integrity. I, on the other hand, behaved with as little common sense as I have credited Cecily with. I was so blinded by my own pride and anger that I scarcely listened to what you tried so inexpertly to convey to me.”
The emotional intensity of the past several minutes was proving to be a terrible strain. Judith felt that she simply had to place the situation back into proper perspective or she feared that she would burst into tears. “I shall ring for sackcloth and ashes if you wish,” she said.
For an instant he was completely taken aback. Then he grinned and there was fondness in his eyes as he looked at her. “You are the most obliging hostess of my acquaintance, I must say. Thank you, but I believe that I will do very well without.” He straightened up from his leaning posture against the mantel. Lifting her hand, he carried it to his lips. “Good night, Miss Grantham.”
Judith smiled up at him tremulously. “Good night, Sir Peregrine.” She watched him go to the sitting room door. She had never asked him whether he still loved her, she thought. But perhaps it was just as well. She was not certain that she really wished to hear the answer.
Sir Peregrine opened the door, but he did not go through immediately. Judith stood up. She felt that she had never been more tired in her life. It was difficult to recall that the tail end of the yuletide holidays were normally the quietest days of the year for her. “Was there anything else, Sir Peregrine?” she asked.
“I do not think that I can allow you to dwindle into an old maid,” he said reflectively.
Judith gasped in outrage, quick color flying into her face. “I beg your pardon!”
Sir Peregrine came toward her, his expression unreadable. When he was within touching distance of her, he said, “I have been haunted these past five years, I thought by my hatred for what you had done. But that was merely hiding the truth from myself. Judith, when I think of the years stretching ahead without you beside me, I find it a very dull and empty vision. I fear that I am still very much in love with you.”
Her outrage over his outrageous announcement faded away. On a sigh, Judith walked into his arms, which folded tight about her. She caught hold of his lapel. “That is just what I wished to hear, my old and enduring love.”
Sir Peregrine put a hand under her chin and raised her face. His bright, piercing eyes laughed at her. “I mean to kiss you, you know.”
“Pray do so,” breathed Judith.
He took her at her word.
Other Books by Gayle Buck
The Righteous Rakehell Mutual Consent Willowswood Match The Demon Rake
Love’s Masquerade The Fleeing Heiress Cassandra’s Deception Belle’s Beau
Magnificent Match Honor Beseiged
Lady Althea’s Bargain Love For Lucinda Frederica’s Folly
Chester Charade Cupid’s Choice
Lord Darlington’s Darling A Chance Encounter
The Waltzing Widow Tempting Sarah
Lord John’s Lady
Lord Rathbone’s Flirt
The Desperate Viscount Hearts Betrayed
The Hidden Heart
Miss Dower’s Paragon Lady Cecily’s Scheme
Regency Tales
Old Acquaintances Holybrooke Curse