Playing At Love: A Rogue Series Novel

by Lara Ward Cosio

  Gavin nodded and took a deep breath in, savoring the sweetness of this moment and the promise of all that was to come.

  ~

  After the excitement of their news had died down, Sophie noticed that Shay was missing from the party. She saw him hunched over the deck railing outside, smoking. The black flight jacket he wore surely couldn’t keep him warm in these low temperatures. She slipped on a long coat and went outside to bring him back in.

  “Shay,” she said and wrapped her arm through his.

  He straightened up with a start. “Sophie,” he said. “Congratulations, dear.” Taking one last drag on the cigarette, he then pinched it out and put it in his pocket.

  She smiled. “Thank you. We are very excited as you can tell.”

  He turned away from her and blew out a stream of smoke. “Of course you are. You two will be amazing at this thing.”

  Nodding, she took a moment to examine him. He was never one to wear his heart on his sleeve but she could see that something was off.

  “Tell me,” she said.

  Her simple approach always had the effect of allowing him to feel more open with her than almost anyone he knew.

  “Jessica. I’m wishing she were here,” he said.

  “Why isn’t she?”

  “Danny Boy made an unexpected visit to the house.”

  Danny Boy. Shay’s troubled brother, Danny, who had spent his adult life bouncing all over Europe in search of the next party—or the next grand self-detox. His pattern was to return to Dublin when he had hit bottom and that invariably meant he would call upon his baby brother. Sophie had only met him a handful of times but had gotten enough of a sense of his cunning ability to guilt Shay into support to make her dread the next meeting.

  “What happened?”

  Shay rubbed his free hand over his buzzed hair. “For some reason he decided it would be a good idea to go ahead and break in. To steal some things, I think. But Jessica was there alone and he scared the shite out of her. He went off on some half-cocked rant that she was after me money. But it was the way he looked that bothered her most. He was . . . in a bad way.”

  Sophie grimaced. “That must have been hard on her.”

  “I came home in time to shut it down. But she’s tired of my ‘co-dependent ways’ as she calls it.”

  “You know that comes from a good place, right? I’m sure what hurts her most is seeing you torn up by this again and again.”

  He nodded and looked out at the sea, fixating on the lights of a boat in the distance. After a couple minutes of silence, he sighed.

  “She’s moving out.”

  “Oh no, Shay. I’m so sorry.”

  “I am too.”

  “Maybe you can work on things—”

  “We’re going on tour, remember? It’s probably for the best.”

  “That doesn’t have to mean—”

  “Thanks for listening, Sophie. You’re a real sweetheart. Let’s get you inside before you catch a cold,” he said and ushered her toward the door before she could protest.

  Moving inside, she was jolted by the laughter and general good energy coming from everyone else. Gavin was taking a gentle ribbing from Celia and Martin over the kind of things he needed to do as a father, including changing diapers. Conor and Felicity were sitting closely together on the sofa and he was whispering to her, eliciting a smile. Christian and Patsy were engaged in a playful debate with James and Maddy over whether Scandal was responsible for Rogue’s early success for having “allowed” the band to support them on tour.

  Sophie suddenly felt a pang of guilt at being so happy when Shay was going through losing his girlfriend and having to once more manage his brother’s life. It made her want to try to be of some sort of help to him.

  “Darlin’,” Gavin said as he went to her. He helped her out of her coat and then slung it over the back of a nearby chair. “You okay?”

  He was watching her with such concern that she smiled. He had been overly solicitous of her since finding out about the baby and it amused her to see him treating her with kid gloves. After all they had been through, the thought that this pregnancy would be a challenge was comical. She had already survived her lowest points and refused to believe that life could throw anything worse at her.

  “I’m good. Great, in fact. It’s not midnight yet, but kiss me anyway,” she said.

  “Happy to,” he said with a grin. He took her face into his hands and kissed her tenderly, his lips brushing hers with the utmost care.

  She pulled away with a teasing bite to his lower lip. “You can’t break me,” she whispered.

  He met her eyes for a moment, taking in the declaration as he knew she meant more than the obvious. “Thank God for that.” He kissed her again, and this time he didn’t hold back.

  ~

  Conor returned to the sofa with two fresh glasses of champagne and handed one to Felicity before he sat with her again.

  “Have I told you how incredible you look?” he asked.

  In fact, he had told her several times, beginning with when she had stepped from the master bath and declared she was ready for the party. She wore the Roberto Cavalli dress Sophie had given her for Christmas. Sophie had insisted with this night in mind that she get it tailored to fit her immediately. It was black with spaghetti straps and intricately jeweled flowers in pinks, yellows, pearls, and blues throughout the body. The plain, tightly pleated skirt fell against mid-thigh. Once again, Sophie’s instincts were right as the dress not only looked great on her but turned Conor’s head as well.

  “You might have mentioned that,” she replied with a smile. “I should warn you, though.”

  He looked at her expectantly.

  “Next time you tell me how attractive I am, I might just do something about it.”

  He smiled in recognition of this “warning,” and said, “I look forward to that.”

  She trailed her fingers through his beard and watched him happily.

  The past several weeks together had been nearly perfect. Though she often talked of looking for a place of her own, she had continued to stay at his house since the night he took her home from the documentary film editing bay. Being together as a real couple had been so easy and so satisfying that they hesitated to verbalize what they were doing for fear of throwing themselves off track.

  There was a brief period where their happiness was interrupted, however. Colette had turned the wedding date originally planned for herself and Conor into a spectacle for the reality show she was filming. She had apparently kept all of the plans, including the church service followed by lavish reception at The Ritz-Carlton Central Park. The cameras filmed her as she walked down the aisle in an incredibly sexy Berta gown that showed off her curves. It was smooth white satin with hand-beaded pearls embellishing the thin straps and low neckline, as well as the plunging open back. She wore no veil and had her hair up so as to better showcase the exposed skin of her back.

  The man she met at the front of the church was none other than Jackson Armstrong. They took great delight in declaring “I don’t” when the priest asked whether they would take each other as husband and wife.

  The ruse was followed by a one-on-one interview where Colette declared herself heartbroken because Conor Quinn had left her for the second time due to his “sick infatuation” with his best friend’s wife. While she played coy about actually naming Gavin as the best friend and Sophie as the woman in question, the insinuation was clear.

  Colette garnered sympathy as well as what she desired even more, media attention. Her reality show was the highest rated in the history of its type, and she quickly landed a spin-off show focusing solely on her and without any of the contestant competition element.

  This also had the effect of new scrutiny of the lyrics of Rogue’s current album. In the past, Gavin had deftly answered questions of Sophie having cheated by saying any reference to her being with another man in his lyrics was focused on when they were separated and so she was free t
o be with whomever she chose. But Colette’s stunt had reawakened a critical examination of each word choice and some media outlets pored over old photos of Conor and Sophie, looking for any evidence of a love affair.

  While Sophie, Gavin, and Conor were agitated with this turn of events, Felicity and James colluded to come up with a way to shut it down. Meanwhile, album sales skyrocketed again.

  In the end, they asked Sophie to enlist the help of two of the more prominent men who had pursued her during her separation from Gavin—the American actor Tucker Williams and the Swedish model Stefan Grojean. Felicity wasn’t sure how she managed it, but Sophie was able to get both men to agree to go along with the quiet rumors James arranged. The whisper campaign said she had had relationships with them that were intimate enough to make her husband jealously pen songs about it.

  The tabloids and web chatter instantly focused on envisioning what those pseudo relationships had been like and sympathizing with Gavin’s heartache over them. They were all amazed to watch random people come forward to claim they could confirm the rumors, as well as Gavin’s state of mind over it.

  The whole matter had occupied a week of the media’s attention before they shifted en masse to another celebrity “controversy.”

  And that gave Felicity and Conor back the freedom to explore their own newfound relationship. She was happily surprised to find their sudden cohabitation was remarkably effortless. Though she was mindful of both having their own space, she found they needed little time apart and instead gravitated to wherever the other one was. They enjoyed being in each other’s company, even during mundane moments like when he lifted weights or when she took a hot bath.

  Felicity decorated his modern home with garish Christmas lights and was delighted to spend the day with his parents, who welcomed her with barely contained enthusiasm.

  The tour was to start in the second week of January. Rogue would begin with an arena tour of Europe, followed by larger scale venues in the Americas, before returning for the summer festivals. After a late summer break, they would head out again, touching down in Australia, New Zealand, and Asia. They would add cities and countries as interest dictated.

  Felicity knew she couldn’t justify traveling with the band beyond the first leg of the tour as most of her work could and should be done from an office at the heart of the Rogue organization in Dublin. She had thought from time to time what life would be like then, with her rock star boyfriend surrounded by temptation everywhere he went. It was part of what she was signing on for, she knew, when she fell for Conor Quinn.

  She had been thinking this very thing for some reason when Gavin asked for their attention and made clear what she had suspected for a while. Sophie was pregnant. Conor had immediately leaned close to her and whispered in her ear.

  “You will be a mother one day. We’ll make sure of that. One way or another, we’ll be parents, too.”

  She hadn’t been able to respond for fear the tears would fall unrestrained along with her words. Instead, she had taken his hand and squeezed it tightly.

  ~

  With only ten minutes until the New Year’s countdown, Conor was happy to close the door on this year. It had been a wild ride, one in which he learned he couldn’t out think his heart and was better off simply following it.

  He watched Felicity as she and the other women circled Sophie, each taking turns touching the barely visible belly bump and cooing over how she seemed to glow. Felicity’s smile and excitement for her friend was genuine, but he knew it carried with it a degree of bittersweetness.

  He had meant it when he told Felicity that they would be parents together. Being with Felicity felt like coming home. It was the surest he had felt about what he wanted in a long time and he didn’t intend to ever let her go.

  The first challenge was to stop her silly talk of moving out. But he didn’t want to scare her with the depth of his feelings, so he let her bring it up now and again. Soon, though, he would make sure she knew he didn’t want her going anywhere. They, as a couple, felt natural and inexorable in the best possible way.

  Above all else, he was looking forward to showing her off as his girl. They had purposely kept their relationship under the radar, especially with Colette’s stunt turning the focus onto his love life. Felicity had argued if he were to be seen dating the band’s media manager, the tabloids would see it as a put on and dig even deeper. Now that that episode was over, he was glad he wouldn’t have to pretend that he hadn’t found the love of his life.

  He was perpetually drunk on this feeling, he had to admit. But he thought that after the various and complicated ways he had kept himself from finding the right connection over the years, he could afford to indulge himself in this for a while. Maybe even forever.

  The Van Morrison song “Bright Side of the Road” came on and Conor felt propelled into action. He stood up and moved toward Felicity, shamelessly breaking up the chatter among the circle of women as he took her hand and kissed it gallantly.

  “What have you in mind?” she asked warily, seeing the gleam in his eyes.

  He pulled her with him and into the open area just beyond the sofas, artfully spinning her before taking one hand in his and holding her close with the other as he led her in dancing to the song.

  “We’ll be lovers once again, on the bright side of the road,” he sang softly along with Van.

  She looked up at him and smiled.

  Soon, the other couples joined them on the improvised dance floor. Sophie pulled Shay by the hand with them and he joined in as they all hoisted their glasses aloft and sang along to the upbeat and optimistic song.

  ABOUT THE AUTHOR

  Lara Ward Cosio is the author of the Rogue Series Novels. When not writing, she can be found chasing her two girls around the house or at the beach,

  always with music on in the background.

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