Trouble

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Trouble Page 6

by P. L. Jenkins


  “Really? Ashley?” She smiles at me.

  “That is your ride. Mine is that cab. You need to have the closure and be okay. You need to tell him bye.” I nod as she hugs me and runs to the cab. He walks up, grabs my bag and we take off for my house.

  “So did you get my text?” I wait for him to answer.

  “Yeah. You are right. This has to stop before feelings go any deeper. I need to leave you alone and you need to leave me alone.” I nod.

  “I am going to miss you. Hey at least it was only two months and one great weekend.” I look out the corner of my eye and he’s smiling.

  “Yeah you are right. Well this is you.” I laugh and he turns to look at me when he notices the now purple mark on my cheek.

  “What happened to your cheek?” I chuckle before placing my hand over his hand which was on my face.

  “I ran into a door. No biggie.” The anger flashes in his eyes.

  “A door? So who the fuck hit you?” I shake my head as I climb out the Jeep going to the back to get my things.

  “Don’t run Lannie! I can protect you. Please.” I slam the back of the door to his jeep and make it to the door when he grabs my hand. I turn around.

  “You can’t protect me. Don’t you get it? You are just another person to play me on their fiddle. You are no better than Evan, my dad, mom, uncle, and mostly you are no better than Chad. Making me miserable when I start getting better you just appear all over again.” He stares into my eyes as I stand there unable to breath. Panic attack was coming on.

  “First off, how am I like them? I don’t leave you, abuse you, and I am always here for you. Second who is Chad?” I hadn’t even known that I said his name. I close my eyes. I spoke quietly before the full panic attack happened.

  “You going to burn me. I am playing with fire, you my friend are that fire. You will leave they all do. Once they get what they want they leave. I become another mark on the bedpost and they go onto the next girl. Not anymore. I am taking control. Chad’s a nobody now.” He runs his hands through his hair obliviously frustrated.

  “You are not making sense Lannie.” I move forward and take a few breaths.

  “I’m falling in love with you. Weird huh? Haven’t even know you until two months ago and then last weekend, it was fun. You didn’t judge me and then you show up here before I left yesterday. Ugh. So this between us is done. You are my teacher and I am the student. That is it.” I walk into my house, slamming the door all while falling onto the ground. I have to remain calm as I dig my cell out of my bag. I power it on and hurry up and send a text to Ashley.

  Ashley: At home, having a big panic attack.

  That was the last thing I remembered before blacking out.

  “Lannie, get up.” I roll over and see Ashley’s face staring at me.

  “Yeah?” She smiles her big smile showing her perfect white teeth.

  “I have a surprise for you. Come get up and put your bikini on. Oh, your mom called they won’t be home until the will has been read. It supposed to be done Wednesday, but who knows. You think they will move there?” I didn’t get what she meant. Why would they move there?

  “I am getting up. What time is it?” She throws my phone at me and all I see is a text from Brandon.

  Brandon: Hope your morning is going better than mine.

  Me: I wish you would tell me who you are. Until than please do not text me. Thank you and goodbye.

  Brandon: Okay. Bye.

  I throw the covers off and decide a shower was good. I don’t remember yesterday, which means that Ashley gave me more medicine on top of what I took on the plane. I get out of the shower; I need to take control of my life. No more J and no more Brandon was a start.

  “La, you ready? Gage is here.” Why is Gage here? I throw my bikini on, a tank top, shorts, flip flops and then finally throw my hair into a pony. Grab my phone and walk out the door. I love my phone case, it’s a wallet and case all in one.

  “I am here, hey Gage.” He takes me into a bear hug, which makes me giggle.

  “I want to take you guys to my buddies BBQ at his beach house. He’s having a little Sunday get together. This day two years ago he lost his little brother. I think that it will be good for him to have friends.” He smiles at me.

  “Who is your friend?” He shifts and looks at Ashley before me.

  “Oh no, I am not going.” I turn around, but Ashley stops me.

  “Lannie, Gage told me something and I always go with you on things and you know that. I think this is best if you go and talk to him. Seriously I think that it will help you a lot.” I nod my head and walk with them. I don’t want to face him. J was the last person I wanted to see. Maybe it will be best to talk shit through to where school won’t be awkward. We get into Gage’s big truck and drove all the way to the same beach house the party was held at. That is how he knew I was going to go. We pull up and park and I notice a few cars in the driveway, but not many. We step out and I mentally start freaking out.

  “Gage, I need a cigarette! Please. Now. Or I’m going to end up taking another pill.” He looks at Ashley who nods, he pulls one out of his pack, lights it for me, and hand it to me. I blow out the smoke staring at it and just realizing I found my new addiction than those pills. This was taking the stress of the world off me. Ashley and Gage head in as I sit there and smoke the cigarette. I need to be okay, because I was going to see him considering we did hang out with same crowd and Ashley is with Gage, who seems to be extra close to him. I head for the beach; I need to clear my head before facing him. I know I’m chicken shit, but I confessed my love for him and shut the door in his face.

  “Hey Lannie.” I look over to see him. Ugh this was unfair. He held up a plate and sets it on the sand next to me with a drink and walks away. I look down at the food not hungry then look back at the ocean. It’s so pretty. I did live in a pretty state. I yawned, feeling still not rested. I lay back and let the sun beat down on me. It was around three in the afternoon and it wasn’t even hot.

  “Lannie, there you are.” I look up to see Ashley staring over me.

  “Hey, what time is it?” I sit up and Gage was with her. I am not ready to leave.

  “It’s about six, you fell asleep and we didn’t want to wake up. You’re lucky you don’t burn. Anyways Gage and I are leaving. You ready?” I look down and notice that I wasn’t even red.

  “No, I want to stay. You go ahead I will text or call if I need anything.” They nod while walking away. I turn my attention back to the ocean. The waves are splashing on my feet.

  “I am sorry. You don’t have to turn around, just listen. Then I will walk away forever. I know it was stupid to talk to you outside of the party. I know it was even dumber for me to take you to my house. Or showing up there the next day. Or at the airport. I truly want to believe that I am not in love with you after that weekend. I want to so bad, but I can’t. I saw a side of you that weekend that I’ve never seen before. You were sad, hurt, and needing help, but didn’t want to burden anyone with it. I saw the light in the eyes at school start to disappear. I for so long had been in search of answers. My brother dyeing in a car wreck was the most painful thing I have ever been through. I am thankful my parents didn’t have to go through it. They were dead for a few years. He was all I had. I even taught at a different school so it wouldn’t conflict with him. He was the light of my life and now he is gone. The first day of school when I bumped into you, there was something in your eyes that I saw. I am not sure what it was, but it was there I see it from time to time. Before you speak. Lannie you are a wonderful girl. Please don’t lose insight of that.” He stood there as I had tears streaming down my face.

  “J, what was your brother’s name?” I know the answer there were too many similarities in the two, not to be him.

  “Chad. Chad Douglas Jones.” I turn behind me to stare at him as he looks down at me.

  “I was afraid of that. What happened that night? Of the wreck?” I know some but some pieces are blurre
d out. He sits down next to me putting his feet in the water.

  “Well I remember like it was yesterday. He begged me all morning and all during school, through text, that he really wanted to go see this girl. I said no with it being a school night. He begged. Until after school. He came home saying he wanted to break up with her. She wasn’t in it for the long run. I laughed at him because I was like you. You are doing the same thing. Well he left. He texts me saying he loved me, but he had to go. A few hours later the officer called me told me he was involved in a car wreck and was rushed to the hospital, and that there was a girl with him who had no ID asking if I knew her. I didn’t though. I threw on my shoes and rushed to the hospital. By time I reached him he was dead. I cried and cried. The girl that was with him though she was incredible. When I asked the nurse they said they couldn’t release the name because the parents haven’t been contacted. I remember walking into her room seeing her lying there. She was like an angel. I stayed there with her until her parents showed up. Imagine my surprise to know that this whole time I knew them. Crazy huh? But I for some reason had no clue who this girl was.” He smiles and I for once was able to smile a real smile. I wonder if he knows it was me.

  “That’s really sad. I am sorry for your loss. I have to go if you don’t mind can you take me home?” He nods, getting up and helping me up. He goes inside and comes right back out.

  “Here Gage told me to give you these. Said that you need to keep them so you can smoke, instead of taking pills. He wasn’t making sense he said she’ll know.” I laugh as I took the full pack of cigarettes and lighter.

  “It’s just an inside joke. I am going to smoke one though before leaving.” He laughs. I light one up and sit on the curb. J disappears and then returns with a cigarette in his mouth.

  “You don’t know how hard it is to hide. But hey already did something that I could get fired over. Why not?” We laugh. I would have never guessed.

  “Let’s go.” We hop into the truck as Bush glisten through his speakers. He was about to change it when I stopped him. Once my hand touched his I felt the warmth of them.

  “Please don’t change it.” He smiles at me Glycerin by Bush was the most amazing song. I close my eyes as the chorus starts. I couldn’t help but sing. I feel his hand grab mine and I held his. It was so perfect.

  “So, why did you want to know what happened to my brother. Or his name?” I stare out the window afraid to look forward. I was always nervous when I stared ahead. He tightens his grip on my hand. I spoke hoping to not be hated.

  “I am the girl. I was the one who caused the wreck I just wouldn’t let him go. Why in the world didn’t I just get out of the truck? Lightening Crashes was playing in his truck when we were hit by the truck running the light. I woke up moments later on the ground and made my way to Chad. He was so bad. I grabbed his hand as he told me he loved me and that he needed his brother to know he was sorry. He loved you so much.” The tears are flowing as he pulls into my driveway and he grabs me and pulls me into his lap. I cried as he held me against him. I knew it was his brother when Gage mentioned it this morning, but damnit I didn’t want to be right. He climbs out of the truck, never once putting me down. He unlocks my house and takes me to my room. It was around nine and dark. He went to leave, but I grabbed his hand.

  “Please stays don’t leave me. As friends.” He climbs in my bed and held me all night. That is how we were when Ashley came to wake me up in the morning.

  “Oh my god.” J jumps up knocking me off onto the floor face first. J looks at Ashley and me and they both start laughing. I grab the blanket and pull it over my head.

  “To early go away.” I hear her moving towards me and landing right on top of me and tickling me.

  “Oh come on. You think I didn’t bring you a monster at least?” I hold out my hand for it. She gives it to me. I sit up on the floor and take a big drink.

  “I am up. Let’s get ready.” I stare at J who had the biggest smirk on his face. I flip him off.

  “So I’m going to head home since I need to get ready.” Ashley jumps off me.

  “Bye Mr. Jones, sir, J. I am conflicted on what to call you.” He winks at me before walking out the door.

  “So La, what happened? You are awful cheery.” I hit her before going to get ready for school. I tell her everything and she was happy that Gage was able to help. She also told me they are indeed official. I’m happy that she’s found her true love.

  We make it to school early for the first time ever. We are usually right on time or late. I hate being late, so early was just as good. I see Evan running towards me and thought this should be good.

  “Hey La, I need to talk to you.” He glances at Ashley... “Alone?” I shake my head no.

  “Fine. So I want to see if you want to go out again?” I laugh so hard I almost pee myself.

  “Look, I am thrilled, but you are the one that fucked me over. I am not in the state of mind to have it done again….Ever. So go find another mark on your post and have fun.” I grab Ashley and walk off. He’s just mad, because I scared his little girl friend and he didn’t want to be a punk about it. I glance at my phone and there was a text.

  J: Where does that leave us?

  Me: Friends. That is what we are. Can you handle that?

  J: I think I can get by. I want you to truly know that I am here for you. I want to help and protect you.

  Me: Thank you.

  “J?” I nod as we head to our lockers. We glance at Shelia the other slut on campus, but she’s more of a nasty one.

  “Hey La. I heard that you went to Mr. Jones BBQ party with Gage and Ashley. Also heard that you sat on the beach all day, because he didn’t want whores in his house.” Got to hand it to her she was good.

  “Well Sha, that’s funny, because I heard that you couldn’t attend the frat parties a couple weekends ago, because they said you were too high school and not hot enough. Also I didn’t go anywhere, but home. That would be because I was at funeral.” She laughs letting it roll off her shoulders.

  “Yeah I heard. You went to your grandma’s funeral who didn’t like you either. Real smooth.” I look at Ashley and mouth sorry. I turn around to her and grabbed her blonde extensions and slam her face into her locker before getting on top of her bashing her head into the ground before I was yanked off by Coach Smith.

  “What in the heck is going on here?” I look down to a hunched over Shelia having blood pour from her nose.

  “Well coach she...” he interrupts me before I can finish.

  “I swear Lannie if you say she ran into something than I am going to be pissed off.” I cross my arms over my chest. As the students all stare at me. There were a few teachers heading towards us including Ashley’s mom and Mr. Jones.

  “Well Lannie lets hear it.” Ashley’s mom spoke.

  “I can’t because Coach said not to say the dumb bitch ran into the locker.” Ashley tries not to laugh.

  “And the ground? She just happened to bang her head?” Coach says annoyed at me. I put a smile on my face and nod.

  “That is it Lannie. My office now.” Ashley’s mom spoke; I look up to see the wide eyes of Mr. Jones.

  “No need I know the drill. I will be back in a week. Shelia, sorry, but next fucking time I see you ball up to me, you better have the damn balls to fight me.” I grab my purse and leave school as I hear my name being called by Ashley’s mom. I know I will get a lecture from my parents. This was not a good idea, but after the week I have had I don’t care. I make it home and go into the kitchen to drown my sorrows in liquor. Hours later my phone rings nonstop from my mom, dad, and even Mark. I didn’t want to talk I had been drinking since I got back home this morning and I was beyond wasted. I lie down on the couch with the crown and drink some more before eventually passing out.

  “Lannie, get up sweet girl.” I look up to see my mom standing above me. Shit. My head hurts.

  “What are you doing here?” my dad walks in and grabs the crown bottle.
/>   “We came back early. So a fight? Suspended?” I sat up and had to keep it together.

  “Sorry. I just couldn’t take it anymore.” She sat down and my dad followed as Mark gave me a hug and ran upstairs.

  “We were thinking of moving to Nevada. Your dad’s just having a great time with his family. Mark loves his cousins. They have a top school for him, and we would have someone to watch him when went on trips, so no burden on you. You are about to go away to New York and live your dream. Why else would we stay?” Ugh, Ashley was right.

  “Umm I am not moving there. That family hates me. I would kill myself before I went.” My dad glances at my mom who lowers her head.

  “You wouldn’t go. You would stay here. In this house until graduation and then we would buy you a condo in New York and sell this house.” I look at them like I was hearing things.

  “Okay, so me by myself. After what happened? When would you leave?” My mom sighs before turning her attention to my father who spoke.

  “In two months. What are your thoughts?” I couldn’t help, but feel as though that family corrupted them into thinking that I am a nobody.

  “What I think? Well that you two couldn’t even be parents to us growing up just flashed money and cars at us. Well me. Than you want to move across country with my only brother to live by the family that abused your daughter all those years? So what holidays would you come here, because I sure in the hell wouldn’t go there? So you know what I think? You two deserve to be there with them, because you guys sure in the hell act like them.” I get off the couch and walk right out the door, and go down the street. I didn’t know if he was home, but I prayed he was. I walk up to the door. I bang on the door. Moments later he answers.

  “Lannie? Everything okay? I didn’t get a text.” He walks to his phone.

  “No I didn’t text you. You said you would be here for me. Well I need you now. My parents are worthless pieces of shit.” He holds the door open as I walk in and plop down on the couch. I didn’t know where else to go. I know this wasn’t the best thing, but for now it was.

 

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