Trouble

by P. L. Jenkins

  “Ash I am fine. I am just not feeling well…” I don’t finish my sentence as I am running back to the bathroom and throwing up again. I run cold water over my face as I make my way back to the room.

  “La, what can I get you?” I shake my head, nothing sounds good.

  “She needs to stay hydrated. I’m going to run to the store and get her some sprite and crackers.” Ashley stops Gage before he leaves.

  “She hates sprite it needs to be white cherry Gatorade. It always works.” He chuckles as he leaves the room.

  “Ash, I don’t want you to get sick. Please.” She dismisses me like always and I feel myself going back to bed. I hear in the back ground her turning on my TV, but I am too tired to care. I really hate this bug thing. I fall into a deep sleep.

  “Lannie, can we talk about us?” I sit down at the lunch table being surrounded by all our friends. I have a feeling this is the “we’re done” speech. We may not be together, but the friends with benefits even have the speech that brings it all to an end. I didn’t want to admit that I had developed feelings for Chad. I haven’t even told Ashley, but that is okay.

  “What about us? I mean we are friends that have benefits, but I get it. It is time to put this to and end and move on to the next thing. Its okay you don’t have to pretend that it meant something. I am a big girl and I knew the outcome of our arrangement when we first hooked up.” I start to eat my lunch, but he just stares at me with his mouth hung open like he didn’t think I knew.

  “Lannie, seriously?” I put my food down, I was hoping that this was done, but I guess not.

  “What? Don’t try to spare my feelings. I was getting ready to move on anyways. Glad you said it and not me.” He slammed his fist on the table causing everyone to stare at us in the whole freaking lunch room. I felt my cheeks blushing at the embarrassment of what kind of game he is playing.

  “You are the stupidest bitch around.” He stormed off leaving me speechless. What did I miss?

  I shot up in bed as I feel the sweat dripping off my face. I look outside to see that the sun has set. I cannot believe that I just had that dream again. I guess with everything going on it was my mind. I stand up feeling weak as hell. I look to my nightstand and see my phone on the charger. I smile knowing that Ashely did it. I head down stairs for a drink. I come back up and crawl in bed and look at my phone. I have a few text messages.

  Ash: I left you Gatorade and crackers in the kitchen thanks to Gage for getting them. Mom said that you are not to come back until you have been fever free for twenty four hours. She even stopped by and confirmed that you were indeed sick and wrote the note for school. I love you bitch you better get better I need the B to my S without you I am not BS just the S. XOXO Ash.

  Gage: I have a half day tomorrow if you need anything please text or call me I will be there as quick as I can. Get better La.

  Mark: I love you Lan. I am sorry you are sick. Get to feeling better.

  Brandon: If you need anything do not get out of bed just send me a text and I will help you. I am here for you like I said months ago and I am still here.

  Brandon: You love music so much I figure this would work better. Griffin Peterson-Maybe Someday. XOXO B.

  I pull up Spotify on my phone and enter the song. The beginning of the song is so amazing. It glistens through my ears. I take in all the words and I am not sure exactly who this guy is, but he has one of the most amazing voices for a guy that I haven’t heard in a long time. A single tear slides down my cheek, but all I do is lay back and listen to the song on repeat. Talking about maybe someday that they will be together. The next verse is dead on. He sings saying it’s “They say it wrong, but feels so right, cut me lose and hold on tight. Words unfinished like our song. Nothing good can come this way, lines are drawn, but then they fade. For her I bend for you I break. If I can’t be yours now… I wait here on this ground… till you come, till you take me away… Maybe Someday… Maybe Someday.” I take in a deep breathe. He secretly admitted to me that he is with someone, my guess is this R person who I bet anything is Rhonda. I am happy for him I am. I can’t string him along till I leave.

  Brandon: If I need anything I promise to let you know. That song was amazing. Listen to same artist but Hold On To You <3

  Ashley: I am fine thank you so much. I think my fever broke so of course I won’t be at school until Wednesday. I will pick you up Wednesday morning. XOXO your bitch <3

  Gage: Thank you. I will keep that in mind tomorrow when Ash is at school.

  I maybe sick, but I have slept all day that I am wide awake. I move into the living room. I look at my phone and see it is after one in the morning. I am go crazy being stuck and sick in the house tomorrow. I turn the TV on and hit the list button to pop my DVR selection and flip through shows landing on Pretty Little Liars. This series is addicting. Of course when it first previewed I swear it would be retarded and then one day I was lying on the couch and a marathon came on and there wasn’t anything on and plus Ashley kept raving about it so I watched and become instantly hooked. Then I learned that it was book series. Crazy. I hit play as the chime comes through my phone. I pull it up and it is from Brandon.

  Brandon: There you are. I thought that I had lost you to sleep. How about Pink-Try apparently Ashley loves that song according to Gage I am to manly to listen to Pink let me know what it is about.

  Me: No need. I know that song well and it is a good song you should try listening to it. I promise not to take your man card. Jason Mraz- Quiet

  I go back to watching my show. I know that I am going too bored as hell tomorrow with everyone in school. I am just thankful that I am keeping this drink down. I’m trying not to think about the whole daddy situation, but what if I get diagnosed with a disease that could have been prevented if I told my doctor about my family history? Ugh this is like the big elephant in the house, not room, house. I throw the blanket off me and head into the office. I debate whether I really want to know or not. I stand there with my hand on the knob for a good fifteen minutes before I give up and turn the knob. Standing in the office feels so wrong without my parents here. This was the one room we weren’t allowed in without permission. I notice that my dad’s laptop is still on there. Which is a little weird I figured he would have took that with him. I head towards it. How am I supposed to find an envelope that contains information about my birth dad when I don’t even know where to begin? I take a seat in the chair and roll around in circles. I maybe seventeen, but this is still fun to do. I stop when something catches my eye. I stand up and head to the filing cabinet. There is a sticky note with my name on it.

  Lannie, everything you need to know is in draw three, file two, and the whole file will contain the information that you seek. Love Dad and Mom.

  Well this is it. Now or never. I walk over to the desk and open the draw with the keys and go unlock the file cabinet and sure enough the file is labeled Lannie’s Birth Dad I pull the file out and begin to look through it. I pause when I read the name. Something about this name is familiar, but what exactly is it? Think Lannie think. Then as if the light decided to turn on I freeze when the name registers to me. Some may say how did I not know. Well when I was little and to this day he has always gone by a different name than I knew. Apparently his name is actually Paul Timothy Clark also known as my Uncle Tim. Are you freaking kidding me? Am I really too be blamed because he didn’t want me and my dad stepped in. Oh my god I have been getting crap from my birth father. This can’t be real. No wonder my dad didn’t want me to know. If there was a health issue he of course would have known. I can’t put the paper down. I keep staring at the name maybe thinking that it changes, disappears, or shit even freaking flames up and burn. Who do you call at two in the morning? I can’t bug anyone they all have school. He will never be my father. “You hear me dad, you are my dad and that is all. Not that man that you guys allowed to abuse me. Is this why? He held it over your head? Is this why you couldn’t do anything? You must have really loved me to allo
w that. Not really.” Time to see if my stomach will keep liquor down because tonight that is what I need the most. There is no way in hell I am telling people this. I will never be that bastard’s daughter. He didn’t want me ever and I sure in hell feel the same.

  CHAPTER 8

  After returning to school, the weeks flew by. Before I knew it, it was Thanksgiving break and I had my dad’s Audi loaded down with my stuff. I lent Ashley my car just in case. I have spent the last couple weeks trying to forget everything that I had found out. Of course I told Ashley the next day when she came home from school to find me sleeping my hangover off. She thought I was still sick till I filled her in what I found out. Mark has come over every night, but eventually got struck with the bug. Brandon of course had to stay home with him so the last few days before the break were awesome. Now I am heading towards the car and driving upstate. I am so excited. This is another chapter to open up in my life to look forward. I am still a little in shock about the whole ordeal, but I can’t help it. At least my dad’s blood still runs through me.

  “I’m going to miss you bitch. Better not get no stupid place.” I laugh while hugging Ashley.

  “I promise I won’t. You better tell me how Thanksgiving goes down.” She nods before we separate. I hop into the Audi and take off. I know I would have to stop in North Carolina for a half way stop and that was still pushing it. I jam out all the way before making it to Georgia. I decide that I was good for the night and pull into a hotel. I check in and make my way into the room. I just need sleep and then I will be good for the rest of the drive. I lay down and look at my texts that I haven’t checked. I see Brandon’s name and I roll my eyes. He is my brother’s guardian not mine. How are we supposed to distance ourselves? I click the dang message icon.

  Brandon: Every have a dream that you wish was so real, but yet it isn’t when you wake up to reality? Yeah not going to lie just had one about Chad.

  My heart skips a beat. Other than that one night he has never mentioned Chad to me. It’s nice to know that I am the one he turns to about this, but it still pains my heart because if anything I know the feeling.

  Me: I do. I had one the day I went to the saloon with Ashley more of a flash back than a dream, but then I had dream about him the night before I got sick. I am sorry. I truly am. It sucks that he died that night. You don’t understand how many nights afterwards I blamed myself for that night and wish that he would have lived and I would have died.

  Brandon: I don’t. I am not happy he died, but when I saw you in that bed I was hoping at least you would have lived. I do believe if you would have died as well I would feel guilty, not for me having part of it, but just the fact he would have killed you. Also if he lived and you died then he would have went to jail or worse lived with knowing he is the reason you died. Where are you at now?

  I guess he did have a good point. It still doesn’t ease the pain knowing if I had just got out of the truck like he said then just maybe he would still be alive.

  Me: Georgia hotel. Resting before I’m back to driving in the morning. Luckily I set up to see three condos Monday and then another three Tuesday. I am hoping to be back Saturday. Gives me Sunday to get ready for another two weeks of school before Christmas break. How is Mark?

  Brandon: He is good staying the weekend with one of his friends. So it’s just me in this house the whole weekend. Thinking of making plans, but I am unsure at this moment.

  Me: I am glad he is getting out. Being cooped up in a house could make you go insane. So if you don’t mind me asking who is R?

  Brandon: Yeah I know that is why I am hoping to make plans. LOL.

  Me: So you are just going to dodge the question. Well goodnight Brandon.

  Brandon: Just a friend. Night.

  Liar. I roll over and turn off the light.

  I wake up to loud ringing and it really pisses me off. I mean it is a break after all. I roll over to see that it is six in the morning. I have had no sleep, but maybe a few hours and here it is Ashley. Shit.

  “What?” I say as I answer the phone.

  “Hey what are you doing?” Seriously?

  “Sleeping what about you?” She whispers something in the back ground before coming back to the phone.

  “So I totally know who R is.” She slurs a little and I then realize that this hooker hasn’t even been to bed and is drunk.

  “Okay please enlighten me. Who is R?” I hear Brandon in the back ground saying something about get off the phone. I thought that he was at home.

  “Brandon, stop it. I will go to bed when I tell her. So La, this R person is Rhonda. The one that you went all bitch on a few years ago at your first frat party. She came with Brandon to pick Gage and me up, because we got really drunk. She is pretty, but not that hot.” That was the last thing she said before the phone was snatched from her.

  “Lannie?” I heard his voice boom through the phone, only it sounded pissed. It also confirmed who I believed it was. I hit the end button and roll over to get a few more hours of sleep before check out at eleven.

  I hate when I have no sleep. Only ten more hours and I will be in New York. I go and check out at nine and get back on the road. My phone has been blowing up with phone calls from Brandon. No text, but a crap load of calls and about ten voicemails. I am assuming Ashley passed out, because she hasn’t tried calling me. Gage tried once I hit the end button, but I bet he is asleep too. Brandon on the other hand is not. Here is phone call number whatever. I hit the accept button and wait.

  “Lannie?” Ugh damn him for sounding sexy and sleepy.

  “Yes? What can I do for you?” He lets a sigh out.

  “Just making sure that you are okay.” I know it is for the best, but I am more aggravated that he couldn’t just tell me who she was. I knew.

  “Yeah I am fine, just on my way to New York. Why?” I wait, but he didn’t speak.

  “Brandon?” He then talks.

  “Yeah I am here. We’ll have fun in New York. I hope you find the perfect condo.” It was then that I hear a woman’s voice.

  “Bye Brandon.” I hit the end button, but hear him mutter shit before I hit it. I must be the shit button, because he says that a lot when he talks to me. I drive the rest of the drive only stopping to fill up and stretch. Before I know it I am pulling into New York. I was in love the first time that I ever saw New York. My parents took me here when I was fourteen and right then I knew that this was the city for me. The traffic, chaos, and the never ending lights. I have had my doubts about getting in, but my dad always told me that if I wished for something so bad that most of time it comes true. Key word being most, because I wish every morning and night that they would be alive or now my wish is that my birth father wasn’t who it is, I pull into the hotel and am amazed at it. I pull into the valet and hand him my key. Its night time, but the city is still booming and I am in heaven. I walk in the lobby and take a good look to memorize this. It has this old historian theme about it. I love it.

  “Hello welcome to the Plaza Hotel. How may I be service to you?” The lady spoke cheerful for being late at night.

  “Yes I am checking in, name is under Clark.” She begins punching buttons as I wait. I turn to see the bar popping as ever. I wonder if I would get carded. I could really use a drink or two. I scan around and I see that New York indeed has a lot of young hot men. Definitely what I need.

  “Here you are Mrs. Clark. A suite for six days and five nights?” I nod at her handing her my credit card. She finishes getting the keys together.

  “Here you go. You are on floor thirteen. If there is anything you need my name is Sam and just hit zero on the room phone, it will connect you to the front desk. Enjoy your stay at the Plaza.” I thank her as I grab my bags declining the bag boy his offer to help. I hate someone touching my bags. I hit the elevator button and wait patiently as I see that it is coming down from floor seventeen. Gosh it will take forever.

  “Hello.” I hear a man’s voice say. I turn to him and am surprised I am
still standing. He is breathe taking. He is tall, dark, and so damn handsome. He has to be in the mid to late twenties. What in the world is with me and older men?

  “Hello.” I smile at him. He smiles showing his pearly white teeth. Man I hate being underage.

  “You from around here?” Okay so there is one thing that I don’t like about New York, random people talking to me.

  “Nope I’m from Florida condo searching. Moving out here this summer.” He nods as he looks back to the elevator and I realize it has stopped on floor five. So close.

  “Florida is nice. Where might you be looking for condos at? I know where some new ones were built recently that are like heaven to live in. I have a penthouse there. I could give you a card, maybe you could check them out.” Oh so he is a business man. That is all not too creepy.

  “That would be awesome. Do you think I might be able to get in this week? I am leaving Friday and this is the only week I can do it considering the long drive.” He smiles before reaching into his wallet and pulling out a card and handing it to me.

  “When you call just tell them that Jake sent you and I am sure they can get you in.” I nod as I hear the ding of elevator door open. We wait as people step out and we step in.

  “If you don’t mind me asking, if you have a penthouse here in New York why are you at a Hotel?” he chuckles making me cross my legs. Damn is it hot in here?

  “There’s this stupid dinner work thing in the restaurant downstairs. I figure that I would have a few drinks so I just got a hotel room, better safe than sorry right?” He turns to me and it was the first time that I notice he has the most gorgeous green eyes.

  “Well good thing that you did stay safe.” He pulls his phone out before rolling his eyes and shoving it back into his pocket.

  “What are your plans for your first night in new York?” Sleep, be lazy, and watch TV, but of course that isn’t what I said.