Love under contract

by Karin Fromwald

  Gregor looked at Zara and saw fear in her eyes, which he had never seen before. He reached for her hand and held it fast. “What is that minister doing there? Isn’t your mother Catholic?” Zara shrugged her shoulders. “She isn’t that devout. What’s most important to her is a beautiful wedding.” She sighed. She didn’t want to stand there. She bit her lips; was all this necessary? Why did she have to marry this man?

  Of course they were seated at the round table with the bride and groom. When Owen, her new stepfather, saw Gregor, he grinned and said to Zara, “Ah, only a business relationship; interesting . . .” She looked at him angrily and if looks could kill, he would have been dead. His bride sat beside Owen, with his niece on his other side, as Zara noted with relief.

  Gregor had greeted Aceline earlier. For him, everything was past history, including the shares of the firm which now belonged to Zara, at least on paper; and Aceline was his mother-in-law, although she didn’t know it yet. He didn’t want to think about the past.

  Zara leaned toward Gregor and pushed back the cuff of his shirt, so that she could see his watch. “We have to dance, probably, and then we can disappear. Maybe to a club?” She meant it more in jest, but unfortunately she wasn’t allowed to joke about that with Gregor any more. He looked at her very seriously, and said, “No clubs; clubs are prohibited!” which he didn’t mean quite as seriously as it sounded, since they had been to a club just the weekend before. Zara smiled. Gregor looked at her hand and saw the wedding ring and lifted her hand up. ‘Where did you find that?” She laughed. “In one of your suits.” He leaned over to her and kissed her gently on the cheek. She knew that she would make him happy by wearing it. And she had to admit that she wanted to make him happy, even though she couldn’t quite explain why.

  Aceline had been watching the two of them and had to smile. He was clearly in love with her daughter, she decided; he hadn’t looked at a single other woman and Owen’s niece was very pretty, a beautiful blonde, who could certainly use her feminine wiles and who was making pretty eyes at him. But he had eyes only for Zara, and as the music began, they danced – and seemed to be conversing happily, laughing and giggling. She felt a wave of jealousy, that her own daughter had gotten this man whom she had always desired. She was a little ashamed of herself, since Zara was her daughter, after all.

  Owen absolutely wanted to dance with Zara and suddenly Aceline was alone at the table with Gregor. She sat down next to him and asked, “Is this serious with my daughter?” Gregor looked at her, disconcerted, and twirled his glass thoughtfully. Of course, she had no idea that Zara had already been his wife for some time, so he said only, “One can say that.” Gregor didn’t want to speak about that with Aceline; it was Zara’s role to tell her mother the truth. “You don’t want to talk about it,” she said, and looked at him. His blue eyes sparkled, and he looked at the dance floor and saw Zara, who was trying to keep Owen at a distance, and pushed him away when he got too close.

  “No, I don’t . . .” Aceline put her hand on his arm. “Be good to her. Everyone thinks that she was born with a silver spoon in her mouth, but she didn’t have it easy – with me and her father.” She didn’t hold a grudge against him. She had earlier, for many years, but she couldn’t now when she saw how much he loved Zara, and she had her revenge. She knew her daughter.

  Gregor laughed. “Believe me, I am.” She really had no idea how much he loved Zara.

  Finally the music was at an end, and Zara returned to the table and leaned toward Gregor. “Come, let’s go; I can’t last through another dance.” Gregor nodded and smiled.

  Zara was alone with her mother for another short moment and she said to her, “He loves you – and believe me, he doesn’t fall in love easily, my God, what I would have given . . .” “Mother!” Zara shook her head. “He never paid any attention to me, but he always said that . . .” Zara looked at her mother, floored; she had always thought that she and Gregor had had a relationship, and then he took the firm away from her – and that’s the way her mother had always told the story. So what was this?

  “I thought . . .” Aceline waved her hand. “Oh, come now, you really didn’t believe that?!” “I’m a terrible business woman, and he was a good banker, not more . . .I wanted to but he never gave me any hope!” Zara couldn’t grasp what she was saying. She had hated Gregor all these years for no reason, only because her mother hadn’t told her the truth? “Mama, I really thought!” “Child, you are naïve!” She looked at her arrogantly, her blue eyes were ice cold, she had used her daughter to gain revenge and she had been pleased that she had left him when he fell in love with her. And he seems to have been spoiling her, so her daughter couldn’t complain. She turned around and joined her new husband.

  Finally they were in the limousine and on their way home. Zara was thinking about her conversation with her mother, staring silently into the darkness. Her thoughts whirled around in her head, she felt like weeping, and wanted to scream, and her hands clung to the sides of her dress.

  “What’s wrong with you?” Gregor asked. In the last hour she had suddenly become so still – and that wasn’t the Zara that he knew.

  Zara always found it difficult to admit her errors, but now it was the time to do so. “I always thought that you had a relationship with my mother,” she finally said.

  Gregor didn’t know whether he should laugh or not. “I could be her son; she wasn’t bad looking at that time, but older women are not my thing, and weren’t years ago, either. How did you come to that conclusion?’

  He did laugh then – loudly, but stopped when he saw Zara’s expression. And suddenly he understood. “No, that can’t be true – you thought that I got the firm by conniving—no, wrong, that I fucked your mother and took her business away from her?” Zara was so ashamed; she lowered her gaze; she felt herself getting hot; she had a lump in her throat. It wasn’t only that she felt bad for him, but she also felt used by her own mother.

  “You certainly had a horrible opinion of me; you could have saved yourself all of that play-acting!” Gregor leaned back and shook his head. “You could have said something,” Zara murmured in her own defense. “What could I have said – about such a perverse thought that I slept with your mother? I didn’t even think of it!?” He was really in a rage. These crazy aristocrats, what were they thinking? “For your information, my sex life is and was somewhat less spectacular than yours!” Zara turned her head and looked out of the car window. Tears ran down her cheeks. She felt really lousy, she couldn’t remember the last time she had felt as bad.

  When the car stopped, she quickly got out and ran up the stairs. She didn’t even watch out for the hem of her expensive dress, which got caught and ripped as she ran away from him.

  Gregor followed Zara into the house. She was already on the second floor, she had shed her shoes on the stairs. He heard the door of the bathroom close. “Zara.” He knocked on the door and opened it carefully. She was sitting on the floor in her ballgown, her face between her knees and her hands wrapped around her legs.

  He kneeled before her and pulled her to him. “Hey, come talk to me!” She couldn’t look at him, and turned her face away. She wept silently, and the tears ran down her face. “Zara.” He took her face in both hands and looked at her. She had closed her eyes; she didn’t want to see him.

  “Zara,” he murmured and kissed her on her wet cheeks; her tears tasted salty. “I’m sorry,” she murmured then and looked at him through eyes swimming in tears. “I forgave you long ago!” Everything; that she had slept with other men; that she had left him; that she had used him . . .

  He kissed her on the mouth, which also tasted like tears. “I love you, even if you’re crazy, arrogant, vengeful, foolish . . .” She laughed softly. “That’s enough now!” she interrupted him. She didn’t want to hear any more of her negative characteristics. He was glad that she was laughing again. “I don’t deserve that,” she whispered and leaned on his shoulder and she meant it. How could he love her, desp
ite everything, he, who could have any other woman?

  “You’re talking nonsense,” Gregor said quietly, pulling Zara up by her arms. He carried her into the bedroom and put her on the bed. She wiped her tears away with the back of her hand and smiled shamefacedly. “I am really awful . . .” Gregor lay down, almost on top of her, and sighed. “Yes, that you are, but you’re good in bed . . .” Zara turned over and now lay on top of him. “How do you mean that?” He laughed and pulled her dress over her shoulders. “Exactly as I said it.”

  “Zara, are you going on vacation?” her colleague, who sat across from her asked, and Zara looked up, straight into Jenny’s brown eyes. “Excuse me?” “I checked the vacation requests earlier, and they’re approved, although I know it’s not necessary in your case . . .” She especially emphasized the “your,” since everyone in the building had become aware in the meantime that Zara had a relationship with the big boss. “Vacation? What are you talking about?” Zara was dumbfounded, and continued to turn the pages of the report that she was working on. She hadn’t requested any vacation.

  Jenny giggled. “Then it was someone else . . . She was thinking of Gregor Levy. “Where is the vacation request form? Let me see it.” Jenny got up and gave Zara the list, glancing at the new Stephane Kelian shoes that she was wearing.

  Zara studied the yellow form and sure enough, it stated that as of the next Monday she was on vacation – for a whole week. That could only have been Gregor’s doing, she thought. She pressed her lips together and put the paper down on the desk. Now just a minute, she thought, and looked at her watch. He must already be in the office.

  She pushed her chair back and smoothed her dress. “I’ll be back in half an hour,” she said to Jenny, tossing her hair at the nape of her neck, and picked up the form. “Where are you going?” Zara grinned. “To the gentleman who would like to send me on vacation.” Jenny laughed. Too bad that she couldn’t witness what was about to take place. Zara was impulsive, but a good lawyer, and she could learn a lot from her – including how to keep company with the gentlemen at the executive level.

  Zara took the elevator up to the top floor, and got off at the large anteroom with the four assistants. Everything here was only the best: leather chairs, expensive paintings on the wall – it was the executive floor.

  “Is he here?” she asked Peggy, the only one who knew that she was his wife. “Yes, but . . .” Peggy looked at the large telephone equipment display. “He’s on the telephone, Madame Valois.” Zara had never been up here before; Peggy had only seen her in some of the magazines up ‘til now. As she stood in front of her, in her tight, very tight, dress, the very high black boots, and the sinfully expensive diamond and pearl jewelry, she was very impressive and elegant. She also smelled so good – a cloud of scent – French perfume, not the mass-produced kind – enveloped her. Peggy sniffed as Zara turned away. Oh, yes, she looked just as she had expected. She wondered if it were true that she slept with other men?

  “And at 11:00 o’clock, he has a meeting,” she called after her as she was about to open the door to Gregor’s office. She walked in and decided immediately that it had to be the office with the best view in the building. One could see all of New York through windows that extended from ceiling to floor. Gregor stood in front of the windows, and spoke on the telephone, with the loudspeaker on.

  He turned around as he heard the door open and saw Zara. “John, I’ll call you back after the meeting.” He hung up and in surprise, asked, “To what do I owe the honor of your visit?”

  Zara waved the vacation request form in front of his nose. “This! How come I’m going on vacation, if you please? I’m working on a contract!” Gregor grinned. “Because I want you to. We’re going to Israel.” “No, we are not going; you’re going, I’m not. . .,” Zara said, and tried not to raise her voice. “Yes, you are.” He was laughing, and Zara became really furious. “Why do you think you’re entitled to determine when I want to take a vacation? We had agreed that I would be just an employee here. And, as such, I have my rights!” She hit him in the chest with her flat hand. He grabbed her hand and said, “Hey, I want to finally introduce you to my parents, okay? Now calm down!” “You can go alone!”

  Just at that moment an older man walked in – with Peggy behind him. “I’m sorry, Doctor Levy.” Gregor looked at her. “Ah, Daniel . . .come in . . .” The white-haired visitor, who was a partner in the firm, smiled at Zara, and said, “Am I interrupting?” Gregor realized that he was still holding Zara’s hand and quickly let it go. “No, she was just leaving.” He smiled at his wife, while she grimaced. “As always . . .” She turned around and headed to the door. “We’ll discuss it later,” he called after her. “Don’t go to any trouble!”

  “I did interrupt, didn’t I?” Daniel asked. Gregor shook his head. “No, no problem . . .” “Your girlfriend – isn’t she the French attorney . . .” he tried to think of her name; she had such a strange French name. “Zara Valois and she is my wife,” Gregor said, and then sat down and gestured to the chair across from him. “Please sit down.” Daniel made himself comfortable. “I didn’t know that you were married.” “It’s a little secret because Zara works here.” “Ah, so . . .”

  Zara was at her desk again and was furiously doodling on a piece of paper. “So, are you going on vacation?” Jenny asked her, curious. Zara looked up. “Certainly not; it’s an error.” This man is going to make her lose her mind; if only she didn’t feel so strangely drawn to him.

  It had to be an hour later that Gregor appeared on her floor. As he approached, Jenny already saw him through the glass door, which was the only divider between offices. He was wearing a dark suit without a tie. He had never been here before in all the time she had worked at the firm, but his visit probably had nothing to do with her. “I think you have a visitor.” The entire firm whispered about their relationship, no, all of New York. Was it true that she had left him once? Right after he had bought her an engagement ring? Jenny wouldn’t have left him – but Zara, now, she was different.

  Zara sighed – he couldn’t cause much more of a sensation; it was a bad idea to work with him here. She looked in his direction, saw his broad shoulders, his handsome face, and his smile. He always beamed at her, already in the morning when she woke up next to him. Sex with him was good, very good actually, he was so obliging, charming; he idolized her, it was the ideal marriage, no, the almost ideal marriage. Strange, how it turned out. She lowered her gaze, and looked briefly at the contract that lay before her.

  He walked into the office, smiled at Jenny and motioned with his head in Zara’s direction. “Come with me for a moment . . .” Zara acted as if she hadn’t heard him. He came over, took her by the arm, and steered her out of the office. In French, Zara scolded him, “Are you crazy” What are the other people here going to think?” “That you have a relationship with me, but they think that anyway already . . .” He, too, had heard the gossip – but he had expected that.

  He was right; they were seen together again and again, so why all the secrecy? She sighed dramatically.

  He opened a door – and several pairs of eyes stared at him – he was looking for an empty room so that he could speak with her. He hated it if all day long he had to think about her being angry. He didn’t want her to be furious with him, not at all; he wanted her to be happy.

  Finally, the third door that he opened led to an empty conference room – without transparent walls. He pulled her inside, put his arms around her and pressed her to him. “I’m sorry, okay . . .” He kissed her, and she moaned softly as he pushed her against the wall. What was he doing to her? He had hardly embraced her and she had forgotten her anger, her frustration, that he had made decisions for her; she wanted only to be loved and kissed.

  “The next time you’d better ask me first,” she whispered. Her hands slipped under his jacket, and she felt his body under the fine fabric of his white shirt. “This isn’t such a good idea – we’re at work,” Gregor whispered softly
and kissed her in the nape of her neck. Then someone opened the door. “Oh, sorry!” And the door quickly closed again. Zara burst out laughing. “I think we have to postpone this until tonight . . .” “Unfortunately, until tomorrow. I have to fly to London yet today,” he responded, sighing. He let her go and looked at her face. This is exactly how he wanted her to be, smiling, relaxed – this is how he loved her, so much that it made him crazy. He knew he wouldn’t survive, not now, if she left him again. Did she have any idea how much power she had over him?

  “But I’ve planned five days on the sea. As secluded as on an island . . .” She knew what he meant: five days, night and day, only the two of them. A pleasant chill ran up and down her spine as she imagined it and she traced his lips with her finger. “So, Doctor Levy, what do you want to do there, work on contracts with me?” “If you want to, and it excites you, then yes!” She giggled like a little girl and pushed him away.

  As they left the room, three men were standing outside, grinning – one of them was the department head – another greeted Gregor effusively, “Hello, Doctor Levy . . .” Gregor smiled and Zara had to control herself so she wouldn’t burst out laughing. But both of them were in quite a hurry to get away.

  She came back to her office and Jenny grinned. “So. . .” Zara sighed. “I’m flying to Israel to meet his parents . . .” Jenny looked at her, open-mouthed. “Wow, that sounds really serious!” Zara shook her head. “More serious than it already is doesn’t seem possible,” she murmured. She hoped Jenny wouldn’t ask any more questions; she didn’t like lying to her colleague.