The Girl Who Lived Twice

by Tina Clough

She paused and thought for a moment while Callum watched her intently. “I do need for him to be caught doing real mischief and be seen to be a cheat, Callum. Not because of nastiness on my part, but because I know of something he did about a year ago, something very bad, and it caused terrible trouble for someone else.”

  “Did you know Josh before you started with us, then?”

  “No, I didn’t know about this thing that happened a year ago until long after the event, but it’s a fact and I know everything about it. I know the person he did it to, you see. He must be shown that he can’t do this again or he’ll continue to trample on others as he climbs the ladder.”

  Well aware of the irony of talking about a misdeed committed a year ago, but still to happen, so to speak, Mia decided not to answer any questions Callum might ask. To her surprise he took her word for it. “I can see that you’re not going to tell me what it was. And I understand that it would be pointless to try and persuade you. But promise me one thing: If this turns out the way you think it will, then you’ll tell me the whole story.”

  Mia stood up and stretched. She felt really tired all of a sudden. “I’ll fill you in over a bottle of wine, but not until it’s all sorted, so please don’t talk to anyone about it! And thanks for waiting with me and driving me home, I appreciate it.”

  At the front door he turned, put his hands on her upper arms and gave her a little shake. “You are so lovely, and so amazingly determined. God knows why I’m going along with this crazy thing! I’ll see you tomorrow.”

  His hands felt warm and comforting. He pulled her closer and kissed her gently at first, then with greater urgency. Before she could either respond or withdraw he stepped back and smiled at her, then closed the front door between them. His voice came through the door; she could hear the smile. “Don’t forget to lock the door now.”

  She went back into the living area and stood by the window looking out at the glittering lights and considered what she felt. The answer was “nothing” - she felt absolutely nothing. It was the first time a man had kissed her since Greg died, and though she liked Callum and found him attractive, the kiss had meant no more than a handshake. She admitted to herself that she had enjoyed the solid comfort of the male touch, but aside from that there was no response of the kind he might have hoped for.

  She shook her head. Ah, well, I hope it was just an impulse – I don’t want any complications right now. I have enough on my plate as they say. She turned the lights off and went to have a shower and scrub her dirty feet before going to bed.

  When Mia arrived in the office the next morning Alan was in his room reading something and looked as if he had been there for hours already. She thought about him telling her that he needed a change and wondered if he got up early and came straight to work because it was preferable to being alone at home. She made a mental note to remember to ask him for a drink or dinner once the rush of new furniture and everything else was over. While the computer booted up she took off her jacket, hung it behind the door and then noticed a manila folder on the corner of the desk. In it were some spreadsheets she had done for one of the first projects she had worked on with Alan. She was surprised only for a moment before she realised. Just then Alan walked in, holding a lever arch file and a pen.

  “Mia, do you remember a couple of weeks ago I mentioned I wanted to change the way the internal reports are presented? It was when we talked about changing the layout of the graphs in a proposal? And you came up with an idea of using those spread-out pie charts?”

  “Yes, you mean exploded pie charts – we used them instead of stack graphs for the percentages. We could easily do something similar with your monthly report, if you don’t like the way it looks.”

  “I was reading up on business psychology and they said that we take things in differently, better actually, if the format changes now and then. If there’s an element of the new and unexpected it sort of forces us to really consider what something actually says, and we process the information differently. I get a bit brassed off sometimes, when I sit in these management meetings, and you can pick up straight off that half the people there haven’t read the material beforehand.”

  “Right! So you figure that if you change the format, they won’t be able to just skim over it while they are in the meeting, and then they won’t know how to discuss the result, so next time they’ll read their stuff before the meeting?” Mia laughed at the prospect, both amused and impressed.

  “Yes, hopefully something will change! How about you show me how to do it, so I can do it myself in future? I really do need to learn a bit more about Excel. Can we sit down together now so you can at least show me how to do that chart format?”

  “Of course, but let’s do it in your room, where we have a bit more room in front of the computer.”

  As they moved toward the door Mia pretended to be struck by a thought and took the manila folder from her desk and held it up. “Where you looking for something before I came in? Did you find it?”

  Alan looked puzzled “No, why? What’s that?”

  Mia feigned innocence. “It’s a folder of some spreadsheet prints from late last year, one of the first briefs I helped you with. I haven’t had it out of the filing cabinet since. It was lying on the corner of the desk, when I came in just now.”

  “Who could have taken that out? Who on earth would be interested? Are you sure you didn’t leave it there last night for some reason?”

  “No, you know me by now - I have a double copy of the tidiness gene and I always tidy my desk before I go home. There was nothing at all on this side of the desk, when I left. I only had that little stack on the far side. And anyway, I haven’t looked at this stuff since we finished working on it.”

  She tried to look suitably concerned and slightly upset. “I can’t imagine why anyone but you would want to go through my files?”

  The episode must have stuck in Alan’s mind, because later that day he sent an email memo to everyone on the ground floor, saying that though people didn’t lock their doors at night, and most filing cabinets were not locked, it would be a good idea to either check with others before searching for things, or else leave a note, that a file had been needed. Alice came past on her way to get a cup of coffee and popped her head in Mia’s door. “Do you want to come up for a cuppa, Mia? I’m on my way now, if you’re ready.”

  They went up the back stairs together. “I’m going out to buy a shawl to wear to the wedding tomorrow morning. What are you up to?”

  “I’m having a huge clear out in the flat, really radical. I’ve got rid of lots of things and I have some new furniture coming in the morning, so I’ll be busy getting organised.”

  “What fun! You are a lucky thing! Oh god, I’m sorry, Mia – I didn’t mean that you are lucky; I just meant it was fun with some new furniture. God, I am such a klutz at times! My mum says I open my mouth only to put both feet in!”

  Mia smiled. “Don’t worry, I know what you mean, it’s not a problem.” When they parted after coffee Alice apologised again and impulsively Mia invited her to come for a visit the next day. “Provided you come before lunch because I’ve got something organised for the afternoon.”

  It was late in the afternoon when Mia saw Josh for the first time that day. He sauntered into her room with one hand in his pocket – the very picture of innocence and unconcern. “Hi Mia, how’s it going? I heard from Alan that someone’s been in your drawers – sorry, no pun intended.”

  Mia kept her expression casual. “Yes, someone must have been going through the filing cabinet for some reason. There was a folder on the corner of the desk, when I got in this morning. Nothing important, just some printouts of a costing file I hadn’t had out for months, but it seemed a bit odd! I thought it might have been Alan, but he didn’t know anything about it.”

  She stopped and said nothing more, deliberately waiting to see what Josh would say next. In her mind she pictured Josh last night, standing in front of the open filing cabinet, no more t
han a meter from where he was standing now. Josh looked puzzled. “Well, you never know, do you? Perhaps it was the cleaner? Or someone else looking for something they needed, though it does sound a bit weird.”

  “Not to worry,” said Mia calmly. “There is nothing in those drawers that would be useful to anyone. And everything I work on is on the public drive on the server anyway. It’s hard to think what harm it would do if someone had a look through my files. It’s just a bit strange.”

  “Ah, well, I suppose you’re right. Nearly time to go home, must go and tidy up my mess. Have a good weekend!” He strolled out and Mia sat looking at the empty doorway, considering the difference between That Time and This Time. Now she was on high alert for everything to do with Josh and she would not miss any clues along the way. It was intriguing to try and figure out how it would work out, because her own actions had changed a raft of minor details. She closed down her computer and stood up. Time to leave and she still had those heavy carry bags to bring home on the bus.

  Next morning the entry phone buzzed five minutes after she got out of the shower. The furniture delivery was downstairs, at least an hour earlier than she had expected. ‘When they say “first thing” they really mean it,’ she grumbled to herself as she pulled on a pair of jeans and dragged a brush through her damp hair, while the men downstairs loaded the lift. After six lift trips the flat looked like a badly organised furniture storeroom and the men were busy assembling the bed before leaving.

  “Can you please sign that you’ve got everything and we’ll be off.” She quickly ticked off the items, and then realised that the bedside tables had not been delivered. They went back down to check the truck and returned in five minutes with the tables.

  “Are you OK moving all this stuff around? Do you have someone to help you?” She couldn’t wait for them to leave, so she could start organising things. “No need to worry, I have a friend calling in this morning.” They gathered up all the cardboard and plastic wrappings, took their trolleys and left. Alone again she stood for a moment relishing the feeling of excitement. There’s no way I want to share the pleasure of this with anyone else. I’ll start right away and get it sorted out a bit more and then I’ll sit down and have breakfast and admire it all.

  It was half past ten before she was done. Things in the living room had been moved around several times to make sure it was just right, and then there were the minor tweaks – the sofa half a meter to the left, so it didn’t cut in on the view from her armchair, the other armchair a bit to the left, so someone sitting there could see the TV. She moved the new TV unit twice, thankful that flat-screen models weighed so little.

  Once the big pieces were in place she spent a lovely half hour deciding where her remaining ornaments would go. She had kept very few and she was being very particular about how they were placed and a couple of things needed particular care. The Trudy Kroepf cast glass bowl must be where it was lit properly both in daylight and at night. The brilliant translucent crystal cube was particularly tricky. It had been a wedding present from Sarah and James - a stunning piece that needed to sit on a dark surface to look its best.

  When she had finished she looked round, satisfied and excited. I have only five ornamental objects in this whole big room, and it looks amazing. And the paintings look better than they ever did! I’ll make up the new bed with new linen and then tidy up. Just as she was thinking of eating something at last the entry phone buzzed.

  “Hi Mia, it’s Alice. Is it all right if I come up for a coffee?”

  “Of course, come on up!” She pressed the button and turned the kettle on. By the time she opened the front door Alice was getting out of the lift. She gave Mia a quick hug. “I can’t wait to show you the shawl I bought, it’s gorgeous!”

  They walked into the living area and it was as if Mia saw it for the first time, the way it would appear to a visitor and she said “Wow!” out loud. She turned apologetically to Alice. “Sorry, but I think I’m a bit over-excited. I’ve just this minute finished making my new bed and I’ve spent the last three and a half hours getting things right. The stuff was delivered before eight this morning and I hadn’t really seen it as a whole till now. It’s like being in someone else’s house - weird.”

  Alice looked round, taking it all in. “Mia, it’s stunning! Just stunning!”

  They did the full tour and then went to the kitchen to make coffee. Alice had brought Danish pastries and Afghan biscuits and was taking them out of the bakery box when the door buzzer went again. This time it was Callum, who “was just going past and thought he’d call in”. Alice insisted that Mia took Callum on a tour too before they finally sat down for a cup of coffee. Alice showed off the shawl she had bought for the wedding.

  “Ta-da!” she announced and flicked it out of the bag and held it up. It was deep turquoise-blue silk with dragons embroidered in red, silver and lime green - vivid and luxurious. Mia and Callum exclaimed at how beautiful it was and Alice was delighted.

  “Mia said a shawl would be perfect with my black slinky dress, because it’s so bare-shouldered. She said I’d be able to drape it over my shoulders like this and let it slip or trail it behind me like a seductive diva!” She strolled across the floor to demonstrate the diva look, let the shawl slip first off one shoulder and then let it droop, trailing it behind her in one hand. Mia laughed. “That will rock them, Alice – they’ll all be after you!”

  It was a surprise to find that Callum and Alice had never really had a conversation before. Alice was her usual sparkling and vivacious self, and Callum was forced to have opinions on things he had never considered before.

  “Really, Callum!” said Alice, amazed and disbelieving. “I can’t believe you never stayed up all night and had pizza for breakfast! You’ve led a sheltered life.”

  At half past twelve Mia broke it up. “Sorry, you two, but I must get ready to go out. I’ve arranged to meet a group of friends and can’t keep them waiting. It’s been lovely to see you both.”

  Alice and Callum went off together, making arrangements for Callum to drive Alice home. Mia thought how amazing it was that since getting up this morning she had not once thought of the cathedral fire, until just now when she mentioned meeting friends. She turned the computer on and took the coffee mugs and the plates to the kitchen while it booted up and noticed that the phone cord in the kitchen was disconnected. How did that happened? Of course, I moved those big shopping bags from the hall to the kitchen bench, when the furniture was delivered. Maybe the phone cord got pulled out when I shoved the bags along the bench.

  The bliss of modern technology - Mozilla swung into instant action. She went to the BBC site and scanned the foreign news items. And found it! Her heart skipped a beat. It had happened on Friday afternoon just as she had predicted. She avidly read the short notice and then clicked on the link to a more detailed article. It was very much as she had described it in her document. The main dome was made of wood and had collapsed during the fire, a minor turret had been destroyed and the entire church was damaged by water and smoke. There were photos of people watching the blaze from across the street and helpers carrying artworks to safety. My god, now I can prove my story! Or at least I can prove that I can predict things that will happen. And unless you believe in magic that proves I must have ‘been here before’ so that’s something, at least. I have to think through this now, before I meet with the others this afternoon – do I tell that whole group what happened to me, or do I just leave it as it is and let them think I can see the future?

  The Danish pastry had not been enough after all the hard work and there was plenty of time until she had to be at the police station. She went to the kitchen and found herself smiling while she made a toasted sandwich. The phone rang and she picked it up with one hand while putting the cheese back in the fridge.

  “We’re absolutely baffled! How did you know? We were there – we saw it, we videotaped it!” Sarah was nearly shouting with excitement. “It happened, the dome collapsed in
a huge shower of sparks, we spent a couple of hours watching, and there was an enormous fireball type thing, a huge explosion from inside - incredible!”

  James must have snatched the phone from his wife. “Mia we can’t wait until we get home, we’re both dying of curiosity. You must tell us how you knew.”

  Mia thought fast; they would have to know sometime, and at least there was some proof now. She decided to give them a short version. “OK, can you try and arrange yourselves again so you can both hear me? I’ll tell you the basics, and give some examples, but the details will have to wait. I can’t do the full-blown version over the phone; I need to see you face to face when I tell you the whole story.”

  “OK, that’s fine, we’re sharing the receiver now. It’s five in the morning here, we’ve hardly had any sleep but we couldn’t get through before, must be the Russian phone system.”

  “No, it was my phone - accidentally unplugged,” Mia laughed. “I pushed things around on the bench this morning and I didn’t notice that the plug thing got pulled out of its socket - don’t blame the poor Russians! Now – this is the brief version.”

  She gave them a summary of the event in the night: Of waking up to find that time had been wound back by a year, taking that fateful Friday off to do the research to establish where she was in relation to certain key events and her decision to take hold of fate and change her own future. As she spoke there was not a sound from the other end of the line.

  “Are you still there?” said Mia, hoping they had not been cut off.

  “God yes, we are still here!” said James. “I suppose we’re just literally struck dumb. Do continue!”

  Mia turned the toaster oven off and went on to relate her reasons for confronting Barb, but decided not to reveal that she remembered that Sarah and James had known of Greg’s affair. She told them of other things she had figured out and about the strange little ceremony at the police station the other night, but she deliberately did not mention Josh or finding Carl. It was too complicated and would mean a lot more explaining.