The Girl Who Lived Twice

by Tina Clough

  Next day Alice and Mia sat at a corner table in the staff cafe. Alice made sure she got the chair facing the door, no doubt keeping an eye out for Callum. Mia was amused and pleased; it would be nice to have something positive to balance the negative impact of Irwin’s death. I hope she and Callum make a go of it and then that’s one thing I can stop worrying about. But Thomas is right; I can’t safeguard everyone’s well being for a whole year, I must learn to let some things go.

  Aloud she said, “Are you all set for the wedding this weekend? I’m keeping my fingers crossed for fine weather.”

  Alice looked pleased and excited. “Guess what! I was going to tell you anyway, but now that you’ve brought it up - Callum’s going to come to the wedding as my partner.” She watched for Mia’s reaction and was clearly relieved when Mia was genuinely pleased. “That’s great – you’ll have much more fun if you bring a partner!”

  Alice looked as if she had personally invented Callum and all his good qualities and was just opening her mouth to say something, when her eyes lit up. Callum was crossing the room towards them and Mia thought they must have synchronised their watches - Callum did not usually appear this early. Alice was smiling happily as Callum told Mia about the film they had seen at the weekend. It was a long time since she had watched a developing romance and it was sweet to see how delighted they were with each other.

  She returned to her office in much better spirits, determined to avoid feeling responsible for everyone and everything. When John rang during the afternoon she was pleased that she could discuss the Irwin event calmly.

  “I think we should meet and discuss where to from here,” he said, but with a question mark in his voice. “I think we need to be on the same page, as they say. I am slightly concerned about you, and we must make sure we all know what you want and plan to fit in with that.”

  Mia was puzzled. Did he suspect or know something and was reluctant to say it, or was it just the natural cautiousness of an experienced policeman? “All right, let’s do that. Why don’t we meet for a drink at my place tomorrow night after work – I’ll ring the others and let them know.”

  “I’d like to ring them myself, if you don’t mind. I want to signal that we need to have a discussion and make a commitment as a team, that whatever you want to happen will happen, nothing more and nothing less.”

  “What are you thinking? I can tell there’s something on your mind, but I don’t understand what it is.”

  “I just worry that someone on the team might try to take advantage of you and your story – I mean really exploit you for fame or financial gain. Don’t worry, I might be wrong, but an open discussion and an agreement by everyone on the team would make me feel happier.”

  Mia’s mind was racing, full of speculation. It couldn’t be Lorraine or John, which only left Miles and Paul. Something must have been said at some stage, which had alerted him, but what?

  “OK, that’s fine with me, makes very good sense in fact. We discussed earlier that my life might become impossible if the media got hold of this, so let’s do it. And I agree - it’s better that you ring the others and set the scene.”

  “I will – what if I tell them six tomorrow at your place? Can I bring some beer and chips or something?”

  “Don’t worry about chips, but some beer would be good. I have wine and nibbles, we’ll keep it simple.”

  For the rest of the afternoon John’s words echoed through her mind. She had suspected from the start that Paul was interested in her, but perhaps he was more interested in using her for gain or fame than the usual male/female reason? Or was it Miles? And if it was, what was he after? She would let John lead the discussion, but she realised that she must be certain of her own opinion and be able to make it clear to the others what she wanted.

  On and off during the evening she tried to imagine how someone could exploit her and how it would affect her. Some people might want her to recall crimes and accidents and warn those who could be injured or killed, but that thought was in the back of her mind anyway. She was waiting for something to trigger a recollection of something she could act on, much as she had tried with Irwin. Deflecting Alice from the Bad Man was another example and probably other things would occur to her as time went on.

  But being able to prevent injury or death for a limited number of people could surely not present enough financial opportunity for the sort of exploitation John was warning her about. And the use-by date of her potential was less than a year away. She only had a limited window of opportunity to offer and then her usefulness would be over. She retired to the study and turned the computer on, hoping for something to divert her attention.

  Sarah and James were unlikely to email her from Brett’s before Wednesday afternoon. They had promised to keep her story to themselves and she would probably tell Brett some time herself, but the fewer who knew right now the safer she would feel. It was not till bedtime that another possibility struck her. Perhaps John suspected that someone would want her to predict a winning horse, or a share market tip or something like that. If she could recall even one thing of that nature she could make a fortune and so could others.

  The next evening John got the discussion underway as soon as they all had a drink in their hands. “I’ll start this off and try and keep it brief, because Paul has to be away by seven, so we don’t have a lot of time. If we can’t reach a conclusion that meets Mia’s needs, then we’ll have to continue another day. We should discuss how Mia’s information can be useful and who can use it. And Mia must have the final say. Irwin ignored or didn’t get the warning. At the moment Mia can’t recall anything else that we might be able to prevent. But that’s not to say that things won’t occur to her as time goes on – we all know what a funny thing memory is, and how things spring to mind for no particular reason.”

  Lorraine raised a finger to interrupt. “Perhaps we should go round the group and hear everyone’s ideas? I’ve been thinking about it a lot since Steve Irwin died. I think that anything, however nebulous, that Mia remembers, where there’s even a slight chance that her knowledge could save someone’s life, should be explored.”

  Paul had obviously been thinking from a policeman’s angle. “I think Mia should concentrate on big crimes, robberies with killings, mass murders – if there were any children abducted and that sort of thing. It might even help if she was hypnotised. If we could get the context of where and what, then we might be able to prevent some major incidents, and save a lot of tragedy and suffering.”

  Mia smiled at him and was relieved that so far this nice man did not seem to want to profit personally, though it might not do his career any harm either if he was instrumental in preventing a major crime. John was nodding in agreement.

  “That’s a thing that occurred to me too. The big dramas would have been in the news and in the papers, sometimes for days on end, so we’re more likely to tease out enough information from those rather than isolated accidents, say.”

  Lorraine agreed, but stuck to her point. “There’s no reason why Mia wouldn’t remember other things as well – we should try for as much as possible, even if it doesn’t contribute to a reduction of police time.”

  “Of course! But what sticks in your mind is the big stuff, you must agree?”

  “Yes, but isolated things too, like an accident where the victim reminded you of someone, or was the same age and had the same first name as someone you know. Those details make events memorable, so I just want Mia to keep an open mind.”

  Mia spoke for the first time, feeling a bit as if they were talking about someone else. “I’ve been thinking of all those things since yesterday. I think waiting for the outcome of the Irwin drama sort of put my mind on hold, but now I’m trawling through memories again. And if I remember anything, big or small, I’ll work on it.”

  Miles had not contributed, but now he spoke up. He sounded vaguely irritated. “It’s all very well working from a humanitarian angle, so to speak, but there are other things Mia co
uld achieve. The Melbourne Cup is coming up in a few weeks and the Kelt Trophy race in Hawke’s Bay – both of them with major gains to be made. If Mia can retrieve the names of the winners we could all make a nice sum of money on a simple bet. Or if there was an interesting development in industry, on the share market say, or the sale of a major company – think if we could have bought 100 shares each in Trade Me two weeks before the sale – we’d be rich!”

  John spoke mildly, as if this was a new, but not particularly interesting thought. “Well, those things could happen, of course, but they aren’t important in the way preventing a disaster is. I think we need to keep our priorities focussed.”

  Miles looked aggrieved. “I don’t mean that we should do one at the expense of the other, it’s just that all aspects are worth the effort. And apart from anything else, Mia might well want to sell her story. Imagine what the interest would be, if a teaser or two appeared in the media, and then hey presto there was a TV programme about the proof, the events which followed and so on. It would be huge! There could be a TV series, speaking engagements, a book, a film even - the possibilities are endless. All it needs is for someone to mastermind it and manage it all to best effect. Mia, you’d never have to work again.”

  Mia was stunned, and all she could do was look at Miles as if he had turned into a monster. Lorraine spoke up in her place. “Miles, you sound as if you already have an idea about who could manage this publicity to best effect?”

  Miles mistook her meaning; he was too fired up to hear the slight irony in her voice. “Yes, I do. I’ve thought about it a lot and I think we could manage the whole thing as a group. Or I would be happy to take it on. All it takes is a strategic plan and a tough negotiator to maximise the profit.”

  Mia could see that both Paul and John were about to respond and found her voice in time to get in first. “No! When I first told you my story I made it really clear that I was telling you something in confidence. There’s no way in this world I want to become famous for this! It would drive me mad! I remember John saying that it could change my life forever and not for the better. And I think he’s right.”

  “But think of the money! Think of never having to work again!” Mile’s voice was one notch louder now and he was carried on a wave of combined enthusiasm and frustration. “Don’t listen only to the cautious voices, Mia. Listen to practical common sense. You’ll be set for life if it’s done right, and I’d be happy to manage all the legal aspects for you. It’s a chance you’ll never have again. It needs to be started while Irwin’s death is still news.”

  John had been watching Mia closely – her dismay was clearly visible and he intervened smoothly. “Mia, it’s your call. You must tell us what the boundaries are and what you aren’t comfortable with. We’ll keep your story private unless you tell us that we can talk about it. Hopefully we have all kept silent until now?”

  It was clear from the way he looked round at the group that this was not a rhetorical questions, but he wanted an answer. Lorraine looked straight at Mia. “I haven’t mentioned it to a soul and I won’t unless you say I can.”

  “I have kept it completely to myself and will continue to do so.” John looked round the group as if he was checking off each face in turn.

  Paul sounded sincere. “Absolutely – same as John. Nobody will hear it from me.”

  Each person had ticked the box - now they all looked at Miles, who was beginning to look flustered and angry. “There’s no need to look at me like that! I haven’t let the cat out of the bag.”

  Mia felt she needed to put a full stop to the debate before Paul had to leave. “I’m quite certain that I only want to use the information for good and in ‘good’ I do include putting a bet on a winning horse in the Melbourne Cup! If I remember the name, which isn’t likely – but if I do remember, I’ll make sure I tell you all, so we can all share the opportunity. And that goes for anything similar – I wouldn’t keep anything advantageous to myself.”

  She took a deep breath and continued with more serious emphasis. “But I don’t want publicity of any kind. No media interest or fame. I can’t think of anything worse. I’d rather do the nine-to-five routine to earn a living and have an ordinary life than become part of the media freak show and have everyone think I can work magic for them.”

  John nodded. “Quite! And don’t forget that if the general public got the idea that you know things in advance, there might be someone out there who’d be prepared to try something nasty to prevent you spiking their guns. Not a risk worth taking!”

  Paul stood up to go, Mia rose to say goodbye and he gave her a hug. “Don’t worry, Mia! Your story’s safe with us, and we won’t let you down. But if you remember that horse I look forward to some unearned money for Christmas!”

  They were silent until the door closed behind him. John was just beginning to speak, but Mia got in first and asked if anyone wanted another drink. Nobody did and Lorraine got up, picked a few things from the coffee table and took them to the kitchen. The discussion was over. John followed Lorraine with a couple of beer bottles and Mia and Miles were left hovering. The silence was slightly tense. Mia could imagine the struggle Miles was having accepting that his ideas had been vetoed and to save him having to make the first effort towards normality she took the lead. “Are you sure you don’t want another glass of wine, Miles?”

  “No, thanks, I must go. I have a date to play squash at 7.30, so I’d better make a move.” He started towards the hall and called out a casual goodbye to the other two in the kitchen. Mia closed the door behind him and went back into the sitting room to find John and Lorraine back on the sofa, pouring more wine and opening the camembert, which had sat there untouched for the duration of the meeting.

  “Ouch!” said Mia and sank down into her chair. “Can you pour me another one too? God, that was a bit of a session. You obviously suspected?” She looked expectantly at John.

  “I’ve had a feeling all along that Miles had his eye on the main chance. He isn’t one to let an opportunity to get rich and famous go by. Don’t know why, really. I only knew him very superficially from a court case, when he rang me about this at the start. But I must say that I didn’t take to him, once I got to know him a bit better.”

  Lorraine was thoughtful and a little embarrassed. “I’m sorry I got him involved. I’ve worked with him on and off in one of my part-time jobs but I have never had any reason not to trust him.”

  “Don’t worry – it’s not your fault. You couldn’t have known he’d be like this and in any case he’s not been untrustworthy yet, just on a different tack.” Mia smiled at her and then returned to John’s comment. “Provided we can trust Miles to keep his word there seems no need to worry. Do you agree John?”

  “I hope you are right, Mia. I noticed that Miles was the only one who spoke in the past tense, no mention of the future. He said he “hadn’t let the cat out of the bag” but he didn’t say he wouldn’t do so in the future. And everyone else was very specific. Perhaps it means nothing? I’ll reserve my opinion of Miles until he’s proved himself.”

  The girls looked at each other and Lorraine spoke first. “My God, John, your policeman’s mind picks up things us mere mortals completely miss. I must start paying more attention to how people word things - that one went right over my head and I bet you didn’t notice either, did you Mia?”

  “No, didn’t register at all, I’m afraid. How about we have something simple to eat seeing it’s getting close to everyone’s normal dinner time?”

  After a joint effort exploring the fridge and the pantry they put together an omelette with onions and tinned mushrooms, a token gesture of a salad, some bread and cheese. They took their wine glasses to the table and settled down to their scratch meal. Lorraine passed the pepper grinder to Mia and studied her thoughtful face. “What’s on your mind? You look as if you’re deep in thought.”

  “Yes, I am - but I’ve been pondering things for a while now. I know the only way to contain this story is
to make sure only very few people know, and that those who know are trustworthy. As regards the team we know where we stand. At the moment we trust everyone apart from Miles. Carl and Thomas know, but I’d trust them both with my life. Actually I wish Thomas had been here today. He has a kind of presence, very quiet and calm, but I think he could put a sort of mental barrier up round Miles and make sure it contained him, if you see what I mean?”

  John was counting on his fingers. “Including you that makes seven. And your sister and her husband know, so that’s nine. I think that’s quite enough!”

  “That’s all very well,” said Lorraine. “But even if we’re fairly certain that eight of us aren’t going to tell anyone else, we have to be prepared for the possibility that Miles might. And if he does, then we are going to need to plan in advance how we manage the situation. It’s exactly the same as having plans for risk management in a business – if you don’t think through every potential issue in advance you’re bound to miss something when there’s an emergency going on.”

  “But it’s worse than that!” said Mia. “I sent that CD to Steve Irwin and there might be untold people in Australia gossiping about it right now - it might be in the papers over there and we just haven’t found out yet. Anything could happen any time from now on!”

  John finished the wine in his glass and poured himself another. “Lorraine, we’ll have to take a taxi again, we’re over the limit now, both of us. This is getting expensive! But back to the subject on hand, I don’t think we can do anything about the CD apart from wait and see what happens. Hopefully it’s either been thrown out or buried in a pile of stuff in the office at the zoo.”

  “That’s what I’ve been hoping too. I think they didn’t respond for one of two possible reasons: Either the CD never reached them before he died or they got it and dismissed it as a hoax, in which case they probably threw it out. But let’s say that something appears in the New Zealand press tomorrow. What will I do?”