Stricken Trust (Stricken Rock)

by Logsdon, S. K.

  I know the way he and I talk it sounds like we’re an old married couple sometimes. But it’s how we roll. And we are furthest from married or a couple.

  “Don’t do it James. Don’t you do it,” I giggle taking another step back.

  He charges at me and swoops me up like a baby into his arms. He’s so big and strong. My stomach does this flippity flop like riding a rollercoaster. I belt out a loud laugh and wrap my arms around his neck and he turn his face and kisses my cheek.

  “I told you my pregnant lady cannot be walking,” he smirks, carrying me from the room.

  “You know you can’t be doing that forever. I’ll gain too much weight and you’ll drop me and then where would we be?” I tease. I know he’d never drop me and I’d never gain enough weight where he would. I bet he max bench presses three hundred pounds easy.

  He walks us into our bedroom and gently lays me down on my side.

  “I know because in twenty years you’ll be carrying me. Okay, maybe thirty,” He kids and slides into bed next to me pulling me into his arms. I drape my leg over his torso and my head on his chest. My babies are touching his side. “See, cuddling with your Teddy Bear isn’t so bad after all.”

  I snuggle down against him my hand on his ribs. “It never is.” I kiss his peck and he sighs.

  “So what you saw…”

  I cut him off. “Calvin James, I’m serious, I don’t need you to tell me. It’s okay. I’m sorry I asked.”

  “Stop it. I’m going to tell you. Now just let me, will ya?” He scolds, but sweetly.

  I nod and kiss his peck again. Running my hand up and down the middle of his chest. It’s soft and buttery. Perfection.

  “Like I was saying. Ten years ago I was discharged from the military. I was going career, the full twenty. It got cut short. No pun intended,” He chuckles.

  I smack him. “That’s not funny.”

  “Ok, it’s not. Anywho… a year or so after 9/11 I was stationed in Iraq and a few other places. I did special Op’s kind of stuff. Our small outfit of five men were captured unexpectedly. We didn’t even see it coming. I can’t remember the details. Docs say it’s part of the stress, my brain blocks a lot of what happened out to protect me. I guess that’s a good thing.”

  I tug onto him tighter, this doesn’t sound good.

  He pats my back.

  “A group of ten soldiers took us. Stripped us of our guns and clothes. They held us captive in a mountain for three weeks. Some of us less. Two of our outfit died the first week from torture. The whole thing was taped, including their beheadings. A lot of my time I draw a blank. But… I was starved and beaten and water boarded for fun. They weren’t seeking information. They just wanted to see who could hold out the longest. If we begged to die they’d make it slow and painful. I never asked to die. I never begged. I took it like a man. I remember that much. Once Johnny, my closet friend of the group, was murdered third in line. I don’t know how. The soldiers got bored and antsy. I think they were itching for a fight so in the meantime they decided to do experiments on me and this other guy Hudson.”

  “Last name?” I ask, tense as hell. I can’t believe James experienced any of this. Wow.

  He nods. “Yeah… So about two and a half weeks in they started burning my ass cheeks with cigarettes. My arms strung up and my legs spread with ropes. That’s how I slept and lived my time there, as did the rest of us. They gave me water once a day, just so I didn’t die. But never enough to have any energy to fight back. I’ve always been a bigger guy. But my muscles were fading quickly. Hudson got the worst end of the deal. They sliced his back with knives every day. I had to listen to him whimper for hours. Between exhaustion, blood loss, and malnourishment, he died hanging by his arms and I was the only one left. I had to watch his corpse hang in the scorching heat and stench for days,” he informs me, his tone even. He’s not shaky about it or anything. I would be bawling. I want to cry for him and his friends. But I have to suck it up. He’s telling me this not to stress me out. I asked to know. I guess this is what I get. The truth.

  I kiss his chest to make sure this is real, that he’s really here with me. I’m shaking, completely a loss for words and he rubs my back. “Calm down, Em. I’m alive that’s all that matters.” I kiss his chest again and hug him closer.

  “I’m so glad you’re alive.” I whisper.

  “Me too. Me too.” He rubs me again.

  I don’t know what I’d do without his warm hands to soothe me every day. I know that sounds needy but it’s how I feel about James. He’s my rock and my caretaker. And not like a dad at all. Like a friend that I love dearly.

  “So the day the military showed up to rescue us. They’d received the beheading videos and they came full force, no-holds-barred. I can’t remember much but when the forces were closing in. One of my captures decided he wanted to kill me slowly and painfully. I don’t think he thought I’d live.”

  I gasp. I can’t help it.

  “The man took a small blade and stabbed a few centimeters under my balls, through my scrotum and then he curved it around my penis and then for shits and giggles decided to cut it too. It bled and bled and bled. I screamed and my arms jerked out of their sockets, once my knees gave out, I passed out. And when I woke up I was in a hospital with a bandage on my manhood. I thought I’d lost it all. I got lucky I guess. I lost one testicle. The other works fine. I have a big scar from under my balls that runs up and around the top of my penis and then of course the one the runs on my penis. It’s ridged but everything I have works like it should and I wasn’t damaged by the grace of god. I’ve had three surgeries to be able to function again. Went through years of PTSD counseling and was honorably discharged from the military six weeks after I was injured. And here I am.” He shrugs.

  I lean up in bed, scoot close to his face, look him in the eye then I kiss him smack dab on the lips. His lips are soft and sweet. He doesn’t push me away. I take my hand and cup his cheek. Oh, this feels nice. I want to show him how thankful I’m that he is who he is. I couldn’t think of a better way than kissing him. He grabs the back of my head and holds me in place. I groan in my throat. His warmth sparking from his lips through mine is so sweet and satisfying. My breathing kicks up a notch and I press my lips harder to his. Melting them together. I open my lips slightly and he does the same. Mine fit into his perfectly, like a lock and key. I suck his bottom lip into my mouth and suckle it gently. Sucking in a sharp breath through his nose he groans in his throat, accepting the loving gesture I’m sharing with him. Slowly I maneuver myself so I’m leaning but I’m on my knees. My lips still on his. I kick a leg over his stomach and straddle him. Cupping his face in my hands for balance. His hands find my hips and hold me firmly against his body. Running my soft velvety tongue over his lip that’s inside my mouth he moans, kneading my hip bones with his thick fingers. In a jerk he sits up, my mouth still on his and I hold onto him. I’m not letting go. This feel so good and so right. He wraps his arms around my back, my pussy is rubbing the thick length of his hard cock in his boxers. My greedy core wants him so intensely. It wants him to plow into me and mark me as his. To love me and fuck me all day long. To make me come and scream his name. But I can’t. It would be wrong. Utterly sinful.

  I press my belly to him and my arms planted around his neck. My legs wrapped around his butt. He pokes his tongue into my mouth and I take it with an overwhelming neediness. His body quaking under me, I swirl my tongue with his, lapping his beautiful flavors into my mouth. Savoring him. He tastes perfect and minty. I grind myself down onto his length. My greedy pussy wants to touch it. Shit, I want to touch it. My nipples are screaming to be sucked.

  Shut the fuck up body! Let me enjoy him. Damn!

  Our tongues swirl fervently together as one. I’m moaning in my throat. I might come from just touching him. His soothing warmth is enveloping me, loving me. It’s perfectly hot. I hump him harder in this boxers. Damn, his cock is huge and thick. He grabs my face. Oh, yes kiss me harder.
His tongue laps mine and it’s thick and gentle, but so sensually erotic. He groans in his throat and quickly pulls my face from his. Our eyes lock. I’m breathing heavily, unable to catch my breath and he’s shaking like a leaf, eyes wide with obvious disbelief.

  I can’t believe I just kissed James! I kissed him. He didn’t kiss me. Well he did kiss me back. But god I’m so hot right now. My clit it thumping to the beat of my heart. I suck in a long breath to calm myself. I can’t rape this man. Even if I wanted to. I love him. He’s sweet and caring. Not a piece of meat.

  I rub the sides of his arms, to calm him. He’s still shaking.

  “I’m sorry,” I murmur. He didn’t ask for this. I was pushing him. Now I feel like a complete ass. Damn me. I just wanted him to realize how grateful I am that he made it and that he’s okay and is in my life. I guess I could have told him. Or wrote it in a hallmark card. That’s what normal people do. I fuck shit up and kiss a man who doesn’t like me that way. He’s made it known, over and over. Plus he’s nineteen years older than me. Stupid, stupid, stupid.

  “I’m so sorry, James,” I apologize and put my hands on his shoulders so I can get off of him without losing my balance. He grabs me by the waist and makes me sit back down against his manhood.

  “Don’t move,” he orders in a whisper. His body won’t stop trembling.

  I wrap my arms around his neck, nuzzle my face it the crook of it, and use my hands to finger his hair soothingly. I run circles on his scalp, massaging him.

  “James are you okay?” I whisper into his neck. I want to kiss it and suck on it. But I already crossed the line big time. That would be totally uncalled for.

  “I’m fine Emily. Just a little surprised. Can I show you something? It’s ugly but I want to show it to you.” He asks softly.

  I nod hesitantly. “Okay, whatever you want. I’m really sorry.”

  Damn, I feel horrible.

  He shifts his weight with me on him to the side of the bed and stands. I unlock my legs from around his waist and he lowers me caringly to the floor. He’s six two and I’m five two, it’s a big difference.

  “Sit on the bed, Emily,” he instructs in almost a whisper. I listen and leave my legs dangling over the side.

  “Please don’t laugh or cry. Just look,” he says and drops his boxers to the floor in one quick swoop.

  Holy shit, I think I just came. Ok, maybe not. But damn! He’s fucking hot as hell. I’ve known this for a while. But when you haven’t seen someone completely naked and then you do. It jumps their hotness level either up or down. His just blew through the roof. He doesn’t look forty three, he looks thirty five and his cock looks thirty. Not that I have much experience. But I’ve watched a lot of porn in the past month.

  My mouth drops open.

  “Please, don’t do that,” he says sadly and covers it with his hand.

  I reach out and pull his hand away.

  “It’s not a bad thing James. Your cock is sexy as fuck,” I giggle. I can’t believe I just said that to him. “Okay…” I take a deep breath. “What I meant to say is you have a beautiful package.”

  I gaze up to him and he’s smiling and blushing fifty shades of red. This is a huge moment for him. I know that. He’s obviously not having sex with women because of this cock of his. And that would be a shame to women-kind all over the world. He should have been dipping into pussies like the rest of the band with that thing. Okay, it does have a fairly nasty scar the runs around his cock and he only has one testicle. But it doesn’t look deformed or bad. It’s definitely not ugly. It has character and it’s hot. If anything it makes his dick sexier. His cock itself has a ridged line that looks like of like a snake but dark pink. It’s hard right now, well only partially. But it’s enough to see most of the scarring.

  “It doesn’t gross you out?”

  “James — if anything, it makes you hotter than you already are. You’re a sweet, loving, wonderful man. You’ve been through so much in life that I haven’t even begun to scratch the surface of. Your cock isn’t gross or deformed or bad looking. It’s beautiful and sexy. It has character now. Which no other man can say. How you got it, is a horror story. But no, it doesn’t gross me out. It’s perfect, just like you.” I smile and blow him a kiss.

  His body is still shaking. I think its nerves. But he’s smiling. Thank heavens.

  “You’re not just being nice are you? You’re overly nice sometimes. You can be honest with me.”

  I chuckle and shake my head. I can’t take my eyes off his cock. I know it’s wrong. But it’s true. The naughty horny side of me is screaming to suck it into my mouth. It really is beautiful and he keeps is cleanly shaven. Which makes it sexier. I can’t shave my who-ha lately because I can’t see her anymore and I’ll be damned if I get cut. No one’s going to see it anyhow. So it’s not like it matters and B.O.B has no eyes.

  Man, I’m all over the place today.

  “James, I’m being honest. I promise. I think he’s beautiful just like you. Now will you please put him away because I’m a horny pregnant lady remember and this is just making it worse.” I tease and blush. I think the heat in this room just turned up a few notches.

  He turns around. Holy shit! His ass is fine as fuck.

  “See,” he says.

  I know what he’s referring to. The burn marks from cigarettes. There’s twenty or so little circle scars. But it’s like his cock. It gives it character. He has no hair on his ass and it has those beautiful muscles on the sides that forms it perfectly. I want to bite it. Oh, Jesus horny bitch between my legs. Shut the fuck up. This is James not Claire or Johnathan. It doesn’t work that way in our lives.

  I shake my head to clear away the naughty thoughts.

  “Yes, I see. And just like the front of you, it makes me horny. So please cover them both back up. I’m dying over here.” I’ve resorted to begging.

  Shit, my stomach hurts. I have to orgasm. My pussy is pulsating and my nectar is soaking my panties. Not a good timing! I’m an idiot.

  I get off the bed. I have to go take care of this.

  “Where are you going?” he asks. I think he’s worried I’m lying to him.

  “Honestly? James. Smell the air.”

  He inhales and a dirty little smile creeps from the corners of his mouth.

  “Now I have to use B.O.B I’ll be back in a few. It shouldn’t take long.” I say making my way to the bathroom.

  He turns around when I’m looking back and his giant cock is hard hanging between his legs. I lick my lips. Oh, fuck. I grab the door frame to steady myself. This is not good. I inhale sharply and gulp back. Fuck, his cock is hot. I haven’t seen one in person for almost two months. Damn-it. Okay, I got to go. I need to stop staring. Stop it, Em. Stop looking at your forty-three year old best friend bodyguard’s cock. This is wrong! This is wrong on every single level.

  “I…uh.” I croak out. “I…” Fuck, I can’t stop staring. I look like a complete horny dumbass. I’m like a man who stares at tits. I’m almost drooling at the sight. It’s official, I’m crazy. I’ve hit the level of horny crazy, I need to be locked up and throw away the key.

  I grip the frame harder.

  “When… um…” Oh fuck, no don’t you dare ask him that. That’s none of your fucking business you horny cunt.

  “When what Emily?” he says his voice is like a gently caress on my skin. Shit!

  “Nothing, nothing.” I shake my head back and forth. He hasn’t moved he’s standing next to the bed naked. Without a care in the world and his cock is hard as a rock. Damn. I bite my lip and groan. I hate this. I hate myself.

  “When was the last time I had sex?” he asks softly and sensually in his deep voice. It’s like his voice is making love to me. I know he doesn’t mean to but I’m so high on hormones I can’t stop thinking about anything else. I squeeze my legs together. Fuck! Oh, I’m going to come. Oh yep. I’m nearly there. I squeeze them again. My body trembles. I hang my head and let out a hard lustful breath.

>   “I haven’t had sex in five years,” He states, with his normal tone. Now that didn’t feel like he was tonguing me with his words.

  I stare up at him and my mouth drops open. “Five?” I sputter out and swallow hard.

  “You’re the third woman ever to see this.” He eyes his beautiful member.

  “And?” Oh shit, I can’t believe I said that. Grab the bathroom door, Emily, and shut it. Stop looking at your hot sexy Teddy Bear who’s naked as a jaybird. And surely stop fucking him with your eyes, you stupid bitch.

  “The first one was my girlfriend I told you about. She was okay with my, you know. But it never felt right, we didn’t click. But she wouldn’t touch it with her hands. The other we never had sex and when she saw it, it scared her. So I haven’t dated since.”

  “You’re an idiot,” I blurt. Son of a bitch! I need to put duct tape over my mouth.

  “Why?” he asks hotly. Damn him. That voice is back. The deep tone with the underlying current of pheromones basically lapping me into an orgasm with his words. Why does he have to be so hot!?

  “Because your cock should be put on display as the hottest thing ever!” I nearly yell.

  He laughs a throaty laugh and that cock and I can’t stop staring at jumps. Fuckkkkkk.

  I back into the doorway and grab the door I slowly shut it and push myself against it sliding to the floor. I push my hand into my panties and I squeeze my clit. Oh! Yes!

  “Oh shit!” I moan out loud. I rub it two more times. Oh yes…… I scream and I break into a million pieces of a perfect orgasm on the bathroom floor. My body twitching and my breathing is heavy. Fucking James and that beautiful cock. This is going to be a huge problem if I ever see it again. Which I hope I don’t. It makes me want to suck it and fuck it and do all sort of other naughty things. Which is all because my stupid whore of a cunt can’t be happily sated for more than a few hours.

  She doesn’t understand that James is James and not just some regular dick. She wants it, all the time. Doesn’t matter if it’s the milk man, the mail man, B.O.B, my hand or whatever else. She wants fucked and fucked good. And Anna misses Claire. But I haven’t touched Anna since I’ve been with Claire. It’s all for her and it doesn’t seem sexual if I touch it.