Wanted: Parents for a Baby!

by Laura Iding

But he couldn’t bring himself to lie to her. “My wife died almost three years ago,” he admitted, surprising himself with his willingness to talk about the past. “I wasn’t ready for a serious relationship.”

  “Oh, Ryan.” Cassie’s expressive brown eyes filled with empathy and she reached across the table to take his hand in hers. “I’m so sorry for your loss.”

  He felt like a total fraud and could barely force air past his tight throat. “Thanks. The circumstances were…difficult.” He cleared his throat, unable to say anything more. He couldn’t bear the thought of Cassie knowing all the gory details. “Enough about me. I need you to know how much I admire you for wanting to be a foster mother to Emma. Being a parent is the most important job in the world.”

  Her gaze clung to his for a long moment, as if she knew he was changing the subject on purpose. But then she released his hand and sat back in her seat.

  “Thanks. But I’m not doing this to impress anyone,” she said softly. “I bonded with Emma right from the beginning. I know it sounds illogical, especially since I’ve only known her for twenty-four hours, but she’s very special to me.”

  “To me, too,” Ryan admitted. He gazed into Cassie’s passionate eyes, struck by the sweeping desire to kiss her, right here, right now. He curled his fingers into a fist to prevent himself from reaching out to her. Thankfully their server chose that moment to return.

  “Are you ready to order?” she asked cheerfully.

  Ryan forced himself to nod. He took a big gulp of his cold lemonade, trying to get himself under control.

  “I’d love to try your Swiss mushroom burger,” Cassie announced.

  “What would you like for a side? French fries, home-made chips or coleslaw?” Maria asked.

  Cassie hesitated then shrugged. “Chips. I can’t resist homemade chips,” she confessed.

  “I’ll have the same,” he managed. “And another refill on the lemonade when you have a minute.”

  “Sure thing,” Maria promised, gathering their menus.

  Ryan stared at his soft drink, wishing now that he had asked for something stronger. Maybe if he dumped the ice over his hot head, he’d cool off faster. Normally he didn’t have trouble controlling his basic desires.

  But he was beginning to think that there was nothing normal about his growing feelings for Cassie.

  And he was damned if he knew what to do about that fact.

  * * *

  Cassie enjoyed every bite of the diabolically delicious Swiss mushroom burger, making a mental note to double the length of her planned run. The homemade chips were awesome, too, and she had to stop herself from eating them all, tossing her napkin over her plate to hide them from view, even though she knew Evan wasn’t here to give her a hard time about what she ate.

  Ironically, Ryan didn’t seem to mind her hearty appetite. The way he kept staring at her with that intense gaze of his was a bit intimidating. She wasn’t used to being the center of any man’s attention. Especially a guy like Ryan.

  Her heart ached for him. Losing his wife couldn’t have been easy. No wonder he didn’t date the nursing staff. She could easily imagine some nurse thinking she’d make the next Mrs. Ryan Murphy.

  All the more reason to get any thoughts of being with him right out of her head. She had enough personal issues of her own to deal with, including becoming a foster mother to Emma.

  Still, she couldn’t help noticing just how different Ryan was from her ex-husband. Evan had never gazed at her so intently. In fact, he’d often stared at other women, even when she’d been sitting right there. Several times since the divorce, she’d wondered why she’d thought she’d loved Evan in the first place. It hurt to realize she may have been looking for the security of marriage rather than being truly in love. And she wished she’d figured that out sooner.

  Before she’d lost her second baby.

  She didn’t want to ruin the moment by dwelling on the mistakes she’d made in the past, so she shook off the memories.

  “You called it, that was amazing,” she said, pushing her plate away and sitting back with a sigh. “I’ll need to double my workouts if I keep eating like this.”

  He scowled and shook his head. “You look perfectly fine the way you are.”

  Fine wasn’t exactly flattering, but that didn’t stop her from blushing. “Thanks again for dinner,” she said, trying to change the subject. “I should probably head back home.”

  “All right,” he agreed, gesturing for Maria to bring their bill. “If you have time, it might be nice to take a walk up to the top of the bluff first. A short walk will help your food digest, making room for dessert.”

  She caught her breath, thinking that a walk to the top of the bluff and dessert sounded like something more intimate than a friendly meal. Or was she overreacting?

  She needed to get a grip. His brain was probably foggy from sheer exhaustion and he just wanted to keep active so he wouldn’t fall asleep.

  She took a deep breath to calm her racing heart. “Sure. That sounds fun,” she said lightly.

  Ryan smiled and quickly signed off on the bill. Before he could say anything more, though, his cell phone rang. He stared at the screen for a moment, before lifting his gaze to hers. “It’s the hospital,” he said with obvious regret. “I’m sorry, I’ll need to take this call.”

  “Oh, no, it’s not Emma, is it?” she asked, leaning forward in concern.

  “I’ll find out,” he promised, pushing the button on his phone to connect to the caller. “This is Ryan Murphy,” he said in a crisp, professional tone.

  Cassie knew she shouldn’t be listening to Ryan’s side of the conversation—after all, there were rules about patient privacy. But she couldn’t bear the thought of something happening to Emma. Or to any of their other tiny patients. Each baby in their care offered hope for the future.

  “Discontinue her feedings immediately and get a chest X-ray, stat,” Ryan said. “I’ll be in to check on her and to write more orders shortly.”

  The way his eyes darkened with regret made her stomach clench. “What happened to Emma?” she demanded, fearing the worst.

  “She aspirated some of her tube feeding while having a seizure,” he admitted grimly. “I’m sorry, but I’ll need to go in. I want to review her X-ray myself.”

  “I want to go with you,” Cassie protested, rising to her feet. But then she let out a heavy breath. “But I can’t. She doesn’t belong to me yet.”

  “Give me your number,” he urged, pulling out his phone. “I’ll call you with an update.”

  “Really?” She readily gave him her number, watching with awe as he programmed her name into his phone. “Thank you, I really appreciate it.”

  Ryan slipped his phone back into his pocket. “Come on, I’ll walk you back to your car.”

  “No, just go and take care of Emma,” she said, putting her hand on his arm to stop him. For a moment his gaze dropped to her hand, before lifting up to look into her eyes, and she had to fight the urge to throw herself into his arms. “My car is only three blocks away. Emma needs you more than I do.”

  He hesitated, and then gave a brief nod. “All right. Take care, Cassandra.” He leaned over to brush her mouth with his in a kiss so brief she thought she imagined it. “I’ll call you later.”

  Speechless, she watched him stride off toward his car, lightly pressing her fingertips to her tingling lips.

  He’d kissed her. She had no idea why, but he’d kissed her!

  And she knew, without a doubt, that he’d call her, too, the minute he had an update about Emma’s condition.

  She was definitely in over her head, because there was no denying she couldn’t wait to talk to Ryan or to see him again.

  * * *

  Ryan forced himself to concentrate on driving, instead of reliving their brief but electric kiss. What had possessed him to kiss her like that? It was as if his hard-won control had abandoned him. He’d wanted desperately to kiss her, so he had. In a public place no less
.

  What if someone had seen them?

  But even the thought of Shana-like rumors rippling through the hospital wasn’t enough to make him regret his action. How could it?

  Every cell in his body wanted to kiss Cassie again, a proper kiss, deep and intimate. The type of kiss that could lead to more.

  But he couldn’t turn his back on his patients either. Matthew was apparently stuck in a touchy delivery so Sheri had called him for help. He didn’t mind, because waiting could prove deadly.

  Well, he minded leaving Cassie, but his needs weren’t important right now. If Emma ended up with aspiration pneumonia, she’d end up staying on the ventilator longer.

  Not to mention that if the bacteria grew in her lungs and transferred into her bloodstream, the overwhelming infection could kill her.

  He tightened his grip on the steering wheel. No way was he about to let that happen.

  Ryan made it to the hospital in ten minutes and as he strode into the neonatal intensive care unit the staff gaped at the fact that he was wearing casual clothes, but he ignored them, heading straight over to Emma’s warmer.

  “I’m sorry to call you back in, Dr. Ryan,” Sheri said, looking flustered. “I pulled up her chest X-ray on the computer monitor, the way you asked me to.”

  “I don’t mind,” he assured her. He washed his hands at the sink and then turned toward the nurse. “Can I borrow your stethoscope?”

  “Sure.” Sheri handed it over and he took the time to listen to Emma’s lungs before giving the stethoscope back and taking a seat at the computer.

  “There’s a small amount of atelectasis in the base of her right lung,” he said, battling a wave of helplessness. “Her breath sounds are diminished in that area, too. I’m going to order respiratory therapy treatments for her as well as antibiotics. Roll her onto her left side a bit, so that her lung can expand.”

  “All right,” Sheri agreed. “Anything else?”

  He stared blindly at the computer screen for a long minute, wishing there was more he could do for Emma. But at this point there wasn’t. All he and Cassie could do was to hope and pray the baby girl would continue to fight.

  He’d failed to save his wife and son, but he was determined not to fail Emma.

  No matter what.

  CHAPTER SIX

  WHEN HER PHONE RANG, Cassie tossed her mystery book aside and shot off the sofa. A whole hour had passed since Ryan had left her to go to the hospital and she was anxious to know what was going on. “Hello, Ryan?”

  “Yes, it’s me. I’m leaving the hospital shortly, but wanted you to know that Emma’s condition has been stabilized for now. The next twenty-four hours will be critical for her, though.”

  She momentarily closed her eyes, letting out a sigh of relief. “I’m so glad you were able to go in to take care of her. She deserves the best.”

  “I’m glad you’re not upset that I had to leave,” he countered. “Not all women are as understanding.”

  “That’s just stupid,” she said, suspecting he was speaking from experience. From the nurse he’d dated last year? Or from his wife? Didn’t matter, she told herself firmly. “What did Emma’s chest X-ray show?”

  “A small collapsed area in her right lower lung,” he said. “I’m hoping that with the antibiotics and respiratory therapy treatments, we’ll be able to prevent full-blown pneumonia. The worst part is that her feedings have to be stopped for a while.”

  “Oh, no,” she said with a sigh. Poor Emma wouldn’t gain much weight without being fed, but the risk was too high. “Thanks so much for calling me. Now go home and get some rest.”

  “I will, if you will,” he said in that sexy, low, husky tone of his. “I’ll give you a call in the morning.”

  “Okay. Goodnight, Ryan.”

  “Goodnight, Cassandra.”

  The way he said her full name in his husky voice made her want to stay on the phone with him forever. She disconnected from the call and then quickly added Ryan’s name and number to her contact list. Why had he mentioned calling her in the morning? To give her an update on Emma’s condition?

  Or because he wanted to see her again?

  She shook her head at her own foolishness. Ryan had made it clear he wasn’t ready for a relationship. And she wasn’t either. Her heart was still raw from the way Evan had trampled all over it. She really needed to stop micro-analyzing Ryan’s every move. Still, forgetting about him long enough to fall asleep wasn’t easy.

  And, of course, Ryan popped into her mind first thing in the morning. She needed to rein in her emotions. She and Ryan were friends, nothing more.

  Besides, the last thing she needed was to be hurt by another man. Discovering Evan had cheated on her had been brutally painful. Not to mention the fact that she might not be able to have children of her own.

  And Ryan clearly loved children. Hadn’t he practically admitted that while they’d been in the elevator with Emma?

  She has us. We care about her.

  Cassie leaped out of bed, anxious to jumpstart her day. She was worried about Emma, so she needed to keep busy. Since she’d promised herself she’d go for a run to work off the Swiss mushroom burger, she donned her running clothes and headed outside. Okay, so maybe she didn’t exactly double her mileage but she ran a total of three miles and felt much better afterwards.

  Saturday mornings were normally reserved for cleaning. She ate a quick breakfast of scrambled eggs and toast, and then decided there was no point in showering until she’d finished cleaning. She tossed a load of laundry into the machine and then began the tedious task of scrubbing her bathroom.

  The sky outside had grown more cloudy, so she turned on the radio to listen for the weather report. Sure enough, there was a chance of thunderstorms rolling in, but not until later that afternoon. After finishing in her bathroom, she started on the tiny kitchen. She was singing along to a song on the radio when her phone rang. She tossed the sponge into the sink, dried her hands on the seat of her jeans and reached for the phone, her heart skipping when she saw Ryan’s name on the screen.

  “Hello?”

  “Good morning, Cassie,” Ryan greeted her. “Hope I’m not calling too early.”

  “Of course not,” she said, glancing at the time. It was ten-thirty. She’d already gone for a run, cleaned her bathroom and finished two loads of laundry over the past two and a half hours. “I hope you were able to get a good night’s sleep.”

  There was a brief pause and she wondered if that was too personal a question. Friends, remember? They were friends.

  “I did, thanks,” he finally said. “I don’t have an update yet on Emma, but I’m sure I’ll hear from Matthew soon.”

  “You read my mind,” she teased. “I was going to ask how she was doing.”

  “I’ll let you know as soon as I do,” he promised. “Do you have any plans for your day off?”

  No way was she going to confess that all she was doing was cleaning, which was nearly finished anyway. “Nothing special,” she said slowly.

  “I thought maybe we could head down to the park, see if we can find the woman we believe is connected to Emma. It’s possible she might live close by.”

  Ridiculous to be disappointed that he had an ulterior motive for getting together. Friends, she reminded herself. They were friends. “Sure, why not? Although you have to know the chances of us just stumbling across her are slim to none.”

  “Maybe, but I bet we’ll run into her sooner than later. How much time do you need?”

  “Give me an hour,” Cassie said, glancing at her kitchen. Surely finishing up in there wouldn’t take long. “Where do you want to meet?”

  “I’ll pick you up,” Ryan said.

  It was on the tip of her tongue to argue, but she reminded herself that this wasn’t a date. “Okay. I live in the apartments on Oakdale Drive. The third building. Apartment 302.”

  “All right, I’ll see you in an hour.”

  Cassie set down her phone and rushed to
finish cleaning her kitchen before jumping into the shower. She used the blow-dryer on her hair, even though she knew the humidity would eventually wreak havoc with it anyway.

  Still, she wanted to look nice for Ryan, even if her long sleek hair would only last for an hour.

  She pulled on a skirt, wincing a bit at her pale legs. One would think that with her dark hair she’d tan easily, but she didn’t. A minute after she finished applying a light coat of makeup, the sound of her door buzzer echoed through the apartment.

  Her heart stuttered and her stomach clenched with nerves, but she went over to the intercom to let him in.

  He knocked at her door barely a minute later and she looped her purse over her shoulder before walking over to open the door. “Good morning,” she greeted him. “I’m ready.”

  His blue eyes swept over her, glinting with approval. “You look amazing, Cassandra,” he murmured.

  She licked her suddenly dry lips. “Thanks,” she murmured. “So do you.” Oh, boy, what was wrong with her? She was acting like this was a date.

  His gaze held hers for a long second, as if remembering their brief kiss. Or maybe that was just her memory working overtime. He stepped back, giving her room to leave her apartment. She released her pent-up breath and wondered if she was crazy to spend her day off with Ryan.

  She already liked him too much already. And she couldn’t bear the thought of giving him the power to hurt her. After all, his last relationship hadn’t worked out, either.

  No, she couldn’t allow herself to become emotionally involved with Ryan. The nurses called him the Heartbreaker for a reason.

  She wasn’t sure she’d survive another emotional train wreck.

  * * *

  Ryan nearly swallowed his tongue when he saw Cassie standing there, looking breathtakingly beautiful.

  He was playing with fire, but at the moment he couldn’t seem to bring himself to care if he got burned.

  “So, did Dr. Matthew call you back about Emma?”

  He nodded. “Yes, she’s doing pretty well. Her chest X-ray looks a little better, so I think the respiratory therapy treatments are working.” He held the door open for her as they headed outside. “As I said before, the next twenty-four hours are critical. If she can turn the corner, she’ll do great.”